Another Boring Day NOT!
by Jeril Dragonsoul
Summary: Bouke's just your average teenager. Average, that is, until Vegeta appears in her bedroom one night. One by one, he is followed by other Z warriors. She's soon got her hands full and she's gotta send them back to their world... but how? *COMPLETE*
1. I don't know how he got here!

It had been another long, boring day in another long, boring week. I stomped up the stairs of my porch and heaved a large sigh as I leaned against a wooden beam. Why did my life have to be boring? I just wanted to have an adventure. Was that too much to ask? By Kami, sometimes I just wanted to blow my brains out from sheer frustration!

I opened the door, walked in and then slammed it shut behind me. "Kaasan!" I roared, stalking into the kitchen. My mother stood there, not noticing the temper I was in. "What the hell are we having for dinner?"

"Absolutely nothing if you are going to use such language in my house, Bouke Enda." My mother answered. 

"Well, fine! Fuck you!" I screamed and walked down the hall into my room. I slammed that door too, almost tearing it off its hinges. I threw my book bag onto my bed and sat in the corner, curled up with my knees touching my chin, thinking.

Why was I stronger then the other kids? I never tried to work out or anything but I just was strong. Abnormally strong. In P.E. the coach had made me lift weights. Again. It had been horrid. My schoolmates had looked on in horror as I easily lifted one hundred and fifty pounds without breaking into a sweat. There went my chance at being normal. Fluttering out the window like a half-dead scared bird.

I grabbed a pad of paper and a pencil from off my floor. Writing and drawing were the only way for me to let my emotions vent. I usually wrote about killing people. These people included my parents, my elder sister, the principal, my teachers and my schoolmates. I was sure I would get back at them one day.

I changed my position so I was cross-legged. I tapped the pencil against my lower lip and tried to think of what to write about. Inspiration hit my. "It had been another long, boring day in another long, boring week." I congratulated myself on such an awesome beginning sentence. The beginning sentence of a story was the key point of the story. It was where the reader's interest was captured or deflected.

I continued to write. It would be a story of a girl who had a horrid life and then got transported to the world of Dragonball Z. This would be before the Cell Saga and she would meet with Vegeta and they would fall madly in love and she would be the mother of Trunks. I had always disliked Bulma and her freaky hair and so in this story Trunks would have _normal_ black hair.

After I was halfway through writing, my belly rumbled. I groaned and stood up, stretching. I had sat there for almost six hours and my neck hurt like hell. On top of that, I had five different assignments due by the next day. I smiled. Fuck my teachers. They were a bunch of weak, bitchy bakas anyway. Pathetic humans.

I blinked. _Whoa… Where the fuck did that thought come from?_ I shrugged it off as watching too much DBZ and I walked out of my room to raid the kitchen. I walked in just as my parents were beginning one of their famous fights that could be heard around the neighborhood.

"When we decided to have children, you said you'd help me raise them!" My mother yelled.

"Oh yeah, bitch? Well, I'm the one who helps with their homework, not diddling around the kitchen like some airhead onna!" my father shouted back, his eyes bulging out and spittle flying from his lips. I slipped by them and got a tub of ice cream from the refrigerator. When my parents argued, I could do just about anything because they were so fixated on the argument.

"Why you fucking son-of-a-bitch! If it wasn't for me and my father's money, you'd've starved long ago!" I brought the tub of ice cream, a couple donuts and a liter of soda into my room, humming happily. My parents' fights didn't bother my anymore. A little surprising, since they almost always pertained to me. I put the food down on the floor and then closed my door.

I thought about the reason I had come home angry as I ate my donuts. _Damn school councilor. Yeah, I'm just a normal eighteen-year-old with violent tendencies. Well, up yours asshole._ I started eating my ice cream as I drew a picture of me beating the shit out of the school councilor and some other people that I hated. _Muwhahahaha! Take that you bastard! And that! And this! Die motherfucker! And…_

I was kicked out of my mad "killing" spree from a knock at the door. "Who the hell is it?" I snarled.

"Bouke?" the voice of my little brother floated through the closed and locked door. I cursed myself for swearing and stood up to open the door. There stood my eight-year-old little brother, in ruffled pajamas and clutching his teddy bear.

"Yes, gutei?" I said affectionately as my little brother walked into my room.

"Reishi? Can I sleep with you tonight?" Zaretu asked, his voice trembling. My heart almost broke. I knew that when their parents fought he got scared. My little brother was the one weak spot in the iron shell I had built around myself.

"Yes, yes. Of course, chibi." Zaretu squealed in delight and hopped onto my bed.

"Yeah! Yeah! Now we can stay up and play video games and eat candy and ice cream and drink pop!" I grinned and tossed my brother the control for the game system. Zaretu sat down and zoned out, staring at the screen in concentration as he played one of his Dragonball Z video games.

I turned back to the picture and found I had lost my interest in that. I took the picture and hid it under a pile of paper. I didn't want my brother finding it. It would poison his mind. I looked back at the game and saw him cheering as Vegeta appeared on the screen. I smiled. Little gutei was a great admirer of the Saiyan Prince and he would have killed to meet him.

Suddenly, a kind of odd glowing light filled the room. I stood up and stood directly over my brother. I had my fists at the ready. Something was happening; I could feel it in my belly. I had always trusted my intuition and I wasn't about to stop now.

I studied my room closely as the glow began to dissipate. That was when I noticed a familiar figure standing a few feet away from me. He looked just like… but that was impossible! "What the hell is happening?" I yelled.

The person turned around and my suspicions were confirmed. Vegeta, the Saiyan no Ouji himself, was standing in my bedroom with a look that could kill.

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Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ, though I wish I did. This disclaimer's covering the entire story, ok? Ok…

Well, it's my second DBZ fanfic. Please review telling me what you think and if you want me to continue! I'll prolly continue even if you don't tell me to but I still need feedback! Gah! There's something with me and the characters in my stories getting abducted to other worlds! And no, the plot for my story is _not_ the plot for this one! I'm not _that_ thick! Definitely not! And I don't hate Bulma. Her blue hair just scares me… And I do love Vegeta!

If you want translations for some of the Japanese words I'll use in this fanfic, go look on my profile and I have a link to a Japanese-English, and visa versa, dictionary. Very helpful. I got Bouke's and Zaretu's names from two Japanese words.

boukendan = tale of an adventure

zareuta = limerick; funny song; comic song


	2. All's I got is a week? Oh Kami, I'm dead...

"Oh my Kami…" I whispered.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Vegeta yelled, "And where the hell am I?"

"Reishi… Is that who I think it is?" my gutei asked.

"Uh, I think so Zar." I gulped, "Are you _the_ Vegeta?"

"Prince Vegeta to you, bakayaro. What do you mean by 'the Vegeta'? Now answer me now before I get really pissed off!" the vein on his forehead became prominent. I gulped again. Yep, it was Vegeta all right.

"S-s-sir, here where we live you are a legendary figure." I explained.

"Now tell me where 'here' is!" Vegeta spat out each word vehemently as he prepared a ki blast in each hand. I could tell he was just about ready to kill me. He then muttered to himself, "At least they have good taste. Imagine if they revered Kakarot." I almost smiled. Wait till he found out…

"In a small town in the state of Alaska. Alaska's part of the United States."

"How come I have never heard of this 'United States'? That damn onna made me memorize a map of this mud-ball planet and I saw no United States."

"That's because we're in another dimension or an alternate universe," my "helpful" brother stated as he scrambled to his feet.

"Way to break it to him easily, gutei. For all we know he might go on a killing spree now." I muttered under my breath, having temporarily forgotten about Saiyans' sharp sense of hearing. Vegeta's eyes narrowed and he thought over the things we had said.

Meanwhile, I looked him over. He was wearing his training clothes and I was so close to drooling. _I wonder if I could… _Zaretu kicked me hard. I glared at him and, mocking me, he put on a dreamy look and covering his mouth so Vegeta could see but I could, he mouthed: Love is in the air. Using that line on me was one of his most favorite pastimes. I lifted my upper lip in a snarl and looked back at Vegeta. He had a smirk on his face and with a blush I realized he had probably noticed everything.

"You will find a way to send me home." Vegeta said simply.

"WHAT?" I screeched. How the hell did he except me to do that? I saw my life flashing before my eyes when I remembered my parents were home and would not appreciate a guy in my room, Saiyan no Ouji or not. _I'm in deep, deep shit now. _"I can't do that! I don't know how you got here in the first place!" I proceeded to think, _but you can stay in my room until you go home!_ I mentally smacked myself. _He's married, you ass!_

"You will do what I say and I don't care that you don't know how I got here. You will find a way to send me back to my world." Vegeta ordered.

I caught myself before I said something I would regret. Instead, for a change of topic, I said, "I bet you're hungry." His stomach growled in reply and he looked ready to kill me. I grinned, "Be right back."

Before he could stop me, I dashed out of my room, slamming my door behind me. I ran into the kitchen and stood in the middle. I felt drained and my brain was screaming for energy. I walked over to the refrigerator, something nagging at my mind. I opened it and behold the half-empty 2-liter bottle of cherry coke from a few days before. I thankfully took it out and thanked my subconscious mind.

When I turned around, I was faced with my two parents. I screamed and almost dropped my soda. I looked left, I looked right. There was nowhere to run to! I took a deep breath and faced my parents. "Hi tousan, kaasan. What's up?"

My tousan looked at me for a moment then said, "You're mother and I are leaving."

"What?" I was confused.

"We are going on a vacation. There's money on the counter and you have a bank account you can withdraw money from. We'll reimburse you when we get back." They started out the door, each carrying a large bag.

"When will that be?" I ran out after them.

They got into the car and as they drove away, my kaasan yelled out the window, "In one week!"

I felt sick. One week. That was all. I had only one week to find a way to send Vegeta back to his world. I looked up at the clear, blue sky and wished Kami would blast me with a lightning bolt.

When the lightning didn't come, I walked back inside and found Vegeta and my gutei standing in the kitchen. "Well, what was that about ikeike?"

I glared at him, "They said they'll be gone for a week but knowing them it'll probably be longer."

"Good. Now fix me something ikeike, I am hungry." Vegeta said.

I was about to throw a retort his way when my brother chimed in, "Yeah reishi! That would be great! I so hungry! Please?" The Saiyan no Ouji stood there, with his arms crossed and smirking that smirk of his that just made me want to leap over and rip all his clothes off and get down to business.

With my cheeks burning at that very bad thought, I grabbed a recipe book and opened it to one of my favorites that would serve ten people. I estimated that would be enough to feed my brother and Vegeta.

As I began to cook, I saw my brother grabbed Vegeta and start dragging him to his room saying, "I want to show you something, Vegeta-sama!" I almost laughed when I imagined the look on Vegeta's face when he saw my brother's collection of DBZ stuff. Yep, this was going to turn out to be a very amusing thing indeed.

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Okay. Well, if you haven't guessed by now, this is an AU and maybe a little OOC. Anyway, got any funny suggestions? Review and tell me them please!


	3. Vegeta Must Pay! What the hell is that?

I finished cooking the meal and I set it all down on the table. I looked at my nifty, special, completely cool, digital watch. It had been fifteen minutes since my gutei had dragged Vegeta off to his room. _Whoa. I can't believe that Vegeta's been able to stand Zar's ramblings for this long. I guess I'd better check on them before the Prince blows a vein or something._ I walked out of the kitchen and down the hallway.

Slowly, and with some apprehension, I opened the door and peeked in. "And these are pictures of you beating up Cell, and this one is of you killing Nappa, this is you and Goku fusing into Gogeta, and you and Vegeta becoming Vegetto, and these are you as Super Saiyan, and this is you getting beat up by Cell, and you getting beat by Goku, and you getting beat by…" Just like I had suspected, my brother was going on and going.

"Shut up, brat! I can damn well see what they are for myself!" Vegeta snapped. He obviously didn't like being reminded of his mistake with Cell.

"Okay." Zaretu picked up a one of his favorite pictures, one of Super Saiyan Vegeta smirking, and a pen, "Um, Vegeta-sama?" Vegeta was busy studying all the pictures the boy had pasted on his wall. "Would you sign this?"

"What?!" Vegeta snarled at my gutei, "You want me, the Saiyan no Ouji, to sign something for you?"

"Well, yes. Something along those lines…" my brother mumbled and scuffed his foot on the floor.

"No." Vegeta said and turned toward the door. He saw me and smirked, "Dinner ready, ikeike?"

I snarled at him, "Yeah, yeah. You males are all the same." Zaretu ran into the kitchen then stopped when he saw the clock. I was close behind him and I realized what he had. DBZ started in two minutes and we never missed it. _Shit! How's Vegeta going to react when he sees it? It's currently the Cell Saga and he doesn't seem too fond of it._

Actually, on further reflection, I realized Vegeta had been amazingly quiet since Zaretu had dragged him to see his room. Maybe Vegeta didn't like the idea of being famous and the object of millions of girls' fantasies. _Nah, who are you kidding? This is Vegeta we're talking about here! Mister Ego-the-size of-the-Solar-System Vegeta that'll kick your ass if you dare address him disrespectfully to many times._

It was too late though. Zaretu had already picked up half of the dishes and moved them to TV room's card table. I sighed and picked up the rest. Vegeta didn't help at all, of course, I never expected him to. Zaretu began serving himself as I turned on the TV and flipped it to Cartoon Network. We were just in time for the entire intro DBZ thing. Vegeta sat down in my dad's leather recliner and for once, I can say that he was, honest to Kami, dumbfounded.

I put food on a plate and handed it to him. He took it and the utensils and ate mechanically. The episode playing was one of my personal favorites. _Vegeta Must Pay_. I glanced at Vegeta and I saw the vein bulging. He looked like he was ready to destroy the TV but yet he still ate and watched. I sighed and sat back. I had lost my appetite. Lucky for me though, the other two had enough of one left to finish off everything.

When the half hour long show ended, Vegeta stood up and stretched. His face was once again the regular look for him. Cold, emotionless and so sexy. _SHUT UP!_ my mind screamed at me. I must have blushed or something because Vegeta smirked and flexed his muscles. I nearly fainted. Hey! If you had had him in your house and he did that, what would you do?

"They censored that." Vegeta said flatly.

"Yeah, I hate American TV. It sucks major shit." I answered.

My brother nodded, "Those damn people at FUNimation. They should all go to hell and rot. I mean, don't you agree, reishi?" My brother had an evil glint in his eye and I knew something was coming, and the blow was going to be low.

"Er, yeah." I was glaring at him. His language was worse then mine and I swore I'd shove a bar of soap down his throat the next day.

"Complete bakas, all of them. Cutting out the shower scenes and all that great stuff. But hey! That's what the Internet's for, right?" My brother grinned slightly while I choked, my mind not knowing whether to laugh or scream.

"What shower scenes?" Vegeta demanded.

"Nothing! Nothing that Veggie-c-ta needs to know!" I yelled. I think Vegeta must have known what I was about to call him because he glared at me.

"Have you watched it today?" Zaretu asked me. He then turned to Vegeta, "She watches it at least once a day. I've even seen her drooling."

Before I could hit my brother, Vegeta said, "Who's in the shower scene?"

"Why, it's…" I slapped my hand over my brother's mouth and picked him up. I then hauled him to his room and dumped him on his bed.

"Now listen to me, you little shit." I hissed. He shut up. I never talked this way with him and he knew I was serious. "I swear to Kami I'll kill you if you mention that. You drool over Bra and Pan, you want me to spill that? And what about those hentai pictures you keep locked up in the little wooden box, huh? That thing wouldn't stand a chance against Vegeta if he was pissed off. Hell, he wouldn't even need to be pissed off. He could break that with one hand."

"No, no, no! Hey, hey, hey! Reishi! When would I ever tell your secret? Right?" my brother now looked like he would kill himself before he told. I loved my secret weapon! It was so useful sometimes!

"I'm glad we've come to an understanding. Good-night, gutei." I kissed the top of his forehead and turned and walked out of the room.

As I closed the door I heard him mumble, "Good-night fat ass." I decided to talk about that later. I had thought I was pretty trim for my age!

Back in the kitchen, I was struck mute. Vegeta had cleaned up the TV room! _What the FUCK? Why the hell would he do that? Unless…_ _No! Snap out of it, Bouke! You baka!_ I mentally slapped and pinched myself.

Suddenly, Vegeta appeared by me. I jumped at least five feet in the air as I hit my head on the ceiling. I rubbed the back of my head and asked him what he wanted. _Please say it, please say it…_

"Where am I sleeping?"

_Damn! _"On the couch or in my parents' bedroom." I said, cursing Kami for all my rotten luck. _Well, it could have been worse. I could have had a sister who also would have been after him._

Vegeta nodded and walked down the hallway to my parents' bedroom. How he knew it was that one I don't know, probably just the old-fashioned elimination process.

Anyway, I yawned and headed over to my room. I kicked aside the empty ice cream carton and sat on my bed. Heh. My parents had just up and left, leaving Zar and I all alone. They didn't even know about Vegeta. Sometimes it was cool having parents who didn't care about you.

I thought about Zar's threat. The little bastard. How dare he threaten me? That turned me to thinking about the shower scene. Hell, I didn't need to watch it anymore! I had watched it over a thousand times and by now I had it memorized!

I stood up and stripped off my clothes. I pulled on my pajamas and checked my alarm clock. I set it to wake me a hour earlier then usual. I had to take into account now that I was cooking for a Saiyan. I closed my eyes and was asleep before my head hit the pillow.

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Ok. Next chap: Veggie-chan's accompanying Bouke to high school!! Whoa! He ain't gonna like that, now is he? Suggestions please!

Bouke is a dirty minded person! Reminds me of myself… And her brother! He's eight and he has bad pictures? Kids these days!! *throws up her hands in disgust* Anywho, it's 12:15 here and I gotta go. Hope you enjoyed this!


	4. Uncle Vegeta? Is he fair game?

Soory that it took me a few days to update this. I've had a huge project that I just completed so I should be updating every other day or every three days now.

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I jerked awake. I sat up and hit my clock. _Why is my alarm clock going off an hour earlier then it should?_ Then I remembered everything that had happened the night before. I lifted my hands and looked at them. They were shaking so violently that I couldn't clutch them into fists. _So it's true,_ I mused, _what my teacher said about shock. Sets in after a half-day or so._

After I took a few deep breaths, I willed my hands to stop shaking. They did thankfully and I stood up and got dressed. I walked outside to the kitchen and pulled down the Bisquick. I began making the batter for waffles. It was the easiest mass-producing breakfast recipe I knew and I was pretty good at making them. I hummed to myself as I poured the batter in the waffle-maker and while I waited for the little light to turn on, I made bacon.

Suddenly, I had the creepiest feeling that I was being watched. I looked around but there was no one around. I shrugged it off due to the fact that I had a major project due today and I was nervous. _OH SHIT,_ my mind wailed, _OH FUCKING SHIT! THE PROJECT!_ I ran over to the counter and picked up the poster board that I had pasted everything on.

It was ruined. There was drool all over it. "Oh my Kami… I'm fucked…" I whispered and staggered over to the trashcan. I dropped the ruined project in it and took the waffle out of the waffle maker. I put in the next dollop of batter and closed the waffle maker.

Then, I marched over to a cage on a desk. "Hamps… you baka of a guinea pig. I'll kill you one of these days." I put another encyclopedia on top of the five others. That damn guinea pig was an escape artist and no matter what I did, he got out, wrecked havoc on something of mine, and went right back to his cage. I think he knew he was immune from my wrath because if I hurt him, my gutei would skin my alive.

I finished making all the other waffles and the bacon. I put it on the table and turned around to find Vegeta staring at me from the kitchen. I felt my skin crawl as he looked at me with his cold, expressionless, heartless, sexy, beautiful… _Stop it._ I warned myself and nodded to the Prince.

Vegeta was luckily the same height and build of my father so he could borrow his clothes until I took him shopping that afternoon. He had chosen jeans and a muscle shirt to wear to school and I nearly whistled when I first saw him.

My brother ran in and seated himself. "Good morning reishi! Good morning Vegeta-sama!" He put two waffles on his plate and five strips of bacon. He poured on a fountain of syrup and then dug in. I shook my head and served myself. Vegeta took the waffle plate and the bacon plate and began eating. I glared at his rudeness but remembered he would not care what an ikeike had to say about his manners.

When we all had finished, Vegeta looked at me. "Where's the other part?"

"What other part?" I asked him.

"Seconds." He said and his belly rumbled. I groaned and walked over to the fridge. I opened the freezer part of it and grabbed a quart of ice cream. I tossed it to him. He looked at it quizzically.

"Eat it. Haven't you ever heard of eating ice cream for breakfast?" I asked with a grin. His hot glare met my eyes and I turned to prepare for school.

After a few minutes, I heard a groan. I rushed into the dining room to find Vegeta rolling around on the floor, gripping his head and the ice cream on its side on the counter. I held my sides as I laughed harder then I had in weeks. Vegeta had had his first encounter with brain freeze. "It's okay, Vegeta." I chuckled, "Just eat it slower." I walked away laughing as the Saiyan no Ouji growled at my back.

By the time Zar had left on the bus a half hour later, Vegeta was done with the ice cream. He had taken a little longer then I had expected but I had had a few things to do so I didn't get impatient. "Come on Vegeta!" I said and walked out into the warm spring air. I adjusted my ball-cap and started walking to school. I looked behind me and didn't see Vegeta. "Vegeta?" I called out.

"Up here, ikeike." His taunting voice answered. I looked up and there he was, flying.

"Um, Vegeta? Listen, you can't fly as long as you're here."

"And why not?"

"Because people will freak and call the cops."

"I can destroy anyone who tries to stand up to me."

I felt like grabbing his throat and choking the arrogant bastard, "Just don't!" I wailed, feeling helpless. With a snort of disgust, Vegeta landed beside me.

"All right." We continued walking in uneasy silence.

Then, my thinking mind hit against an obstacle. "Er, Vegeta? What do I tell my teachers when they ask who you are?"

"I am Vegeta, the Saiyan no Ouji, you baka!"

"They won't buy that." I thought for a moment, "How about you're my older broth…." That brought a frosty glare flying my way, "Ooooookay… Scratch that idea. How about…" I racked my mind for ideas and then got one. I had just watched 'Terminator 2' recently and that was what inspired me. "Uncle Bob!"

"No! I will not have some baka name like 'Bob'."

"All right." I pouted. Bob was one of my favorite names. "How about Harvey?"

"NO WAY!" he shouted at me.

"Fine! You suggest something!" I yelled back.

"Vegeta. I will be your," he grimaced, "_Uncle_ Vegeta."

"Okay. They'll just think my grandparents are DBZ freaks." I said more to myself then to my 'uncle'.

When we arrived at school, Vegeta got _a lot_ of looks from all the girls. My friend, Rachel, had to fight her way through the crowd to get to me. She looked Vegeta over appreciatively but then noticed his expression. He had the Vegeta smirk on. "Like what you see?" he asked her.

"Get lost!" Rachel shot back but he cheeks colored slightly. She then asked me, "Who's he? Your date or your older brother who you never told me about?"

"Neither. He's my uncle." I answered, "My uncle Vegeta." I could barely keep myself from smiling at the way that sounded.

"Uncle, huh?" she looked him over one more time as did many of the other girl who had heard me, "How old and fair game?"

"I'm twenty or so." Vegeta lied. Many of the girls smiled at him seductively.

Rachel prodded my side, "Fair game?" she repeated.

I looked at Vegeta then answered. I couldn't stand to be followed around by these girls my entire school week, "He's taken. Married."

"Awh." Rachel groaned slightly and a few of the girls left. I was surprised though that most of them stayed.

One of the girls who left was on the arm of her boyfriend and he asked her loudly, "What's he got that I don't?"

"A body that most guys would kill for. Including you." She answered, giving Vegeta one last look over her shoulder. The guy made a "pshaw" sound and left her to go to his class.

As we fought our way to my first class, English, I checked my watch. _School's been going for five minutes now!_ "Oh my Kami!" I yelled and showed my watch to Rachel. She also screamed and we tore our way through the girls. We weren't making much headway when my 'uncle' decided to help us.

Vegeta roughly pushed me out of the way and began shoving the girls around us away. After the first few fell down and got a little hurt, the others quickly left. Rachel yelled her thanks as we all dashed to the class.

I think the only reason we didn't get detention was Vegeta.

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Don't worry, you'll be able to read Vegeta's , erm, _encounter_ with the English teacher in the next chap. *lol* It'll be fun! *Vegeta glares at Jeril, knowing he's going to be ogled again*

Like it? Any suggestions? Please let me know!


	5. Do not touch the Royal Ass!

I halted in front of the door of the classroom and listened carefully. The teacher was doing roll call. I was just in time. "Bouke Enda? Is Ms. Enda with us today?" I opened the door and walked in.

"Hi Ms. Piers! Sorry I was late! There was a large crowd in the hallway and we had a horrid time getting through!" Ms. Piers glared at Rachel and I then noticed Vegeta, as did all of my fellow classmates. I saw more then a few girls go starry-eyed. Ms. Piers smiled brilliantly and rushed through the rest of roll call.

Now, Ms. Piers is single and in her late twenties. She is fairly attractive, or so I am told, and she has made a few plays for the vice principal and some of the students. In much of the student body's eyes, she is a slut. She dresses like one and acts like one. I knew from the moment she looked at Vegeta that he would not like her attention but she was still going to give it to him.

After roll call, she sat on her desk and looked at Vegeta and I. He was sitting in a spare chair by my desk. "Ms. Enda. Please do us the honor of introducing the person accompanying you."

I stood up, blushing slightly. "This is my uncle Vegeta." I sat down again.

Ms. Piers arched an eyebrow in my direction. "Tell us more, Ms. Enda. What's his age? What does he do? Where does he live?" I almost groaned aloud. Yep, she was going to try to snag him all right.

"My uncle is married and lives a ways away. He doesn't have a job and trains most of the time." I sat down again.

"Mr. Vegeta," she made his name sound purely sexual, "please tell us about yourself." _Oh shit! He's going to kill me with his "Saiyan no Ouji" talk! I'm going to be the laughing stock of the whole school! Everyone's going to think my uncle's a freak and a nutcase and my life will be ruined!_ I waited for my life to come crashing down on my head with my eyes tightly closed.

"There's no more to tell, baka." Vegeta said from his chair and smirked at Ms. Piers.

She flinched as if he had thrown something at her. To cover up the rejection, she pulled out our textbook. "Class, turn to page 224 of the hard covered textbook and Mr. Stone, please read." Gary read in a halting manner. I had always despised him for that.

My mind straying from the class, I thought back to what Vegeta had said to my teacher. _I'm in deep shit for that remark. She'll prolly take out her anger on my grade. Thank you monkey._ I growled to myself. _I'll have to talk to him about calling people names. If he calls Mr. Burn a baka…_ I shuddered at the thought. Mr. Burn was the vice principal, a nice guy but if you called him fat-ass to his face… Mr. Burn wasn't really overweight, he was pretty muscular actually but he did have a few extra pounds around the belt area. The story goes that when one boy called Mr. Burn that, he grabbed the boy by the throat and dragged him into the cafeteria kitchen. He held the boy's face close to the hot burners until the kid apologized and took it back. The next day the sixteen year-old transferred to the other high school. Said he couldn't stay within twenty feet of the "psycho".

"Ms. Enda? Ms. Enda!" Ms. Piers' voice brought me back to class. I looked up, startled. "Well, it's nice to know that you were paying attention. Please pick up from where Ms. Davis ended."

I panicked. I hadn't been paying attention naturally, who does in class? So I didn't know where we were, of course. In Ms. Piers' class, that was an instant ticket to detention. I looked at Rachel but she shrugged slightly. She couldn't help me out. I looked over the page, hoping something would catch my eye. I felt Ms. Piers' eyes drilling into the top of my head as I bent over the textbook.

"225, second paragraph." I looked at Vegeta in surprise. He had actually been listening to the class. I quickly picked up from where Rachel had left off. Ms. Piers' eyes narrowed. I guessed she had wanted to keep me in after school to lecture me. Inwardly I chuckled. _Hehehehe! You're not gonna get your chance this time whore!_

After I was finished, I nodded my appreciation to Vegeta. He just snorted quietly and turned away. I still couldn't believe the Saiyan Prince had actually been listening to an English class, and following along in the book!

Luckily, my next three classes had male teachers. I dashed out of the classroom, followed closely by Vegeta who was followed by Rachel. She and I were split till lunch so I waved good-bye to her as I showed Vegeta the way to my next class. "Listen, uncle. You can't go calling people names like that." Once again, Vegeta was in front of me, plowing through the dense crowd of girls.

"And why not, ikeike?" Vegeta asked.

"Because! I'll be suspended! Or you'll be thrown out!" Suddenly, Vegeta stiffened. He looked to his left with a glare that could burn. There, now cowering, was Hanna. She was a pretty girl but not too bright because she didn't follow the rule: look but don't touch. As Vegeta grabbed her by the throat and lifted her up, I realized she must have pinched his ass.

Not really caring about her, I doubled up with laughter. Vegeta dropped her and turned the glare on me. Hanna crawled away whimpering. "Just why do you find that is so damn funny?" he roared, the vein popping into existence on his forehead.

"I can't help it!" I giggled, "It's too funny to not laugh at!" That's when I found myself hoisted up by the neck. I squeaked in terror as I felt my eyes begin to bulge out of my skull. My oxygen supply was slowly being cut off! I saw the world being reduced to a small pinprick as I heard a distant voice yell, "Let her down!"

I was dropped to the floor with a thud. As I gulped in the sweet, luscious air, I noticed everyone had cleared away from Vegeta and I except one senior. "Leon!" I gasped to the guy I knew very well. I did not want Vegeta using him as a punching bag. Leon was the scholarly type and wouldn't be able to take much physical damage.

"You know this brat, ikeike?" Vegeta asked me.

"Yeah!" I gulped in some more air and staggered to my feet. "He's my boyfriend!"

"For your sake then, I will not pound him into the ground." Vegeta waited for me to recover.

"Who's this psycho?" Leon asked me, putting an arm around my shoulder to steady me.

"My uncle." I said with a little laugh.

"I am not a psycho." Vegeta growled in a tone that resembled Mr. Burn's. Leon must have noticed the similarity because he nodded vigorously and walked me back to my next class in silence. He was also in it and he sat behind me, staring at the back of Vegeta's head the entire time.

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Well? Do you think Mr. Burn heard about the little 'incident' in the hallway, hmm? *evil cackle* Bad Hanna! I wish Veggie-chan had killed her…

No one reviewed the last chap! *cries. Bob hits her over the head with his baseball bat. That brings her back to reality* Okay… Well, *sniffle* I guess reviews don't really matter. As long as people enjoy it.


	6. Subway Sandwiches and Leon's WHAT?

It was lunch, finally. I staggered into the cafeteria and held my head to try to stop its pounding. Vegeta just had to insult every single teacher that he met and in my rush to get to the last class, I had forgotten that Mr. Eveans was attracted to men. _Kami, kill me!_ _I feel like running off a cliff right now. That would be preferable to this hell!_ "Ikeike, where's the food?" Vegeta snarled at me.

"Look's like there no cliff to run to…" I mumbled to myself and pulled out my wallet.

"What did you say?" Vegeta asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Nothing," I said with a sigh. I had fifty bucks. I wasn't sure if that was enough to feed both Vegeta and I. Kami, I felt like I could eat an elephant! I looked at Vegeta, "Listen. The budget's fifty and we have to feed both you and I. Luckily, they let us seniors leave campus to eat."

"Why don't we eat here?" Vegeta looked around the cafeteria.

"Here! I'll show you!" I dragged him over to the counter and made him look at the food they served. It was a noxious green color and it _oozed_ around the plate.

"It's… it's moving…" Vegeta stuttered.

"Yeah! You still want to eat here?" I said in a cheerful, sarcastic voice.

"Let's go!" Vegeta walked out of the cafeteria with me trailing him. Before we could leave the building though, we were stopped by Vice Principal Burn. _There goes my week,_ I thought to myself desolately.

"Bouke!" Mr. Burn barked, "Can you please explain the disturbance that has been occurring in every one of your classes?"

"Eheh. Uh, well… you see Mr. Burn… the day's been a little…" I struggled to grasp for the right words.

"I'm waiting!" Mr. Burn's face was getting redder by the minutes and his nose hairs were protruding from his nose at least an inch.

"My uncle's the source of all the problems, sir." I said in a rush.

"Where's your uncle?" Mr. Burn looked around.

"Right behind you, sir." Mr. Burn turned around and looked down. Yep, Mr. Burn was about a foot taller then Vegeta and he seemed enjoy that fact.

"So, you're the one behind all this?" Mr. Burn said in an accusatory tone.

"Well, if you didn't have weaklings and whores for teachers here, there wouldn't be a problem." Vegeta shot back. I giggled slightly. That was _not_ true. Vegeta would insult anyone, even if they were stronger then him.

Mr. Burn and Vegeta glanced at me quickly and then looked back at each other. "Stop disrupting the classes or I will be forced to expel you from these building." Mr. Burn stated in a voice that was low but carried far.

"You forgot to say the magic word." I burst out laughing and dropped to the ground. _Vegeta actually knows the magic word? This is too rich!_ I couldn't help myself as I lay there in a heap and laughed.

"What?" Mr. Burn spluttered, not paying any mind to me.

"The magic word. You forgot to use it." Vegeta nudged me with his boot slightly and I got control of myself.

"Uh," Mr. Burn looked lost. "Abracadabra?"

"Sorry. Wrong word." Vegeta began to walk off and I followed him. As we rounded the corner, he called back. "The magic word is 'please'."

"Whoa! I could not believe you said that to him!" I wiped a film of sweat off my forehead.

"Why not? The man has almost no ki to speak of, he's so weak." Vegeta asked as we walked to Subway.

"Because, Mr. Burn's nutty! He's off his rocker! He's crazy, that's why!" I answered.

"How do you know this?"

"Well… Uh… I just do." I said lamely. I opened the door to the fast-food place and held it open for the conceited Prince.

"Hey, Bouke!" Leon said. He was directly in front of us in line.

"Hey Leon." I said.

"I heard about your uncle using the old 'magic word' trick on Mr. B." Leon said and grinned at Vegeta. The Saiyan no Ouji glared back.

"How does information pass this fast?" Vegeta asked me in a lowered voice as Leon began making his order, "Are some of your friend telepathic?"

"No," I suppressed a chuckle, "but they might as well be."

"Hello and welcome to Subway. May I take your order?" the lady behind the counter asked Vegeta as he was standing in front of me.

"Uh, uh, I…" Vegeta looked at me.

"I'll go first." I sighed and made an order for a foot-long BLT with the meal. The lady looked at Vegeta.

"Ten of what she's having." He said.

The lady's jaw dropped, "What? Ten?"

"Yes! Ten!"

"Where are you going to put it all? Aren't you worried about getting fat?" the lady looked at me.

"We're buying for a few classmates of mine also." I offered and clamped a hand down on Vegeta's arm before he began to talk about Saiyan metabolism. She took that answer and began making the food. "Vegeta." I hissed in the Saiyan's ear. "People here don't know about aliens and all. So just keep your mouth shut."

"Or else what, ikeike?" he asked me.

"I won't introduce you to my friend who researches all this interdimensional shit."

"All right." I handed the money to the man behind the counter and he gave me the measly two dollars and fifty-two cents change. Leon gestured me over to his table and I sat beside him and Vegeta sat across from us. All our food covered the entire table. We made small talk during the meal. "We" included Leon and I. When Leon tried to ask Vegeta a question, Vegeta would just glare at my boyfriend and continue eating.

About halfway through the meal, Vegeta stiffened and his eyes widened in shock. Five seconds later, Leon sat up sharply and his face went white. Vegeta glared at Leon and snarled in a low, dangerous voice, "Just what the fuck do you think you were doing?"

"I… I… uh… I…" Leon looked like he was going to pass out and Vegeta looked like he was going to grab Leon's neck and snap it. "I need to use the restroom!" Leon yelped and ran to his destination like a demon was after him.

I watched him run then looked at Vegeta accusingly, "What the hell happened?"

"I believe your _boyfriend_," Vegeta used the word like it was the worst curse ever invented, "was playing the human game 'footsy' with me."

"What?" I dropped the little bit that was left of my sub on the table in shock.

"My reaction exactly." Vegeta growled and slide out of the booth. He picked up his last sub and drink and then said, "I'm leaving." He marched off to the door. With a grimace, I picked up my drink and hurried after him. _Leon, you better have a damn good explanation for that one!_

"Vegeta," I said as we walked out of my last class and toward the school exit, "Meet Mike. Mike, meet Vegeta." Mike offered his hand but Vegeta ignored it.

Mike pushed up his glasses and peered at Vegeta. "Are you a fan of Dragonball Z?" he asked Vegeta.

I elbowed Vegeta before he could utter a word, "You could say that." I said for him. Vegeta glared at me and I glared right back at him.

"You resemble the Saiyan no Ouji slightly." Mike said in a professorial voice. I snickered. _Oh how little you know Mike, my friend, _I thought as we exited the building.

"Mike, could you do my uncle and I a slight favor?" I asked.

"Well…"

"Please?" I drew out the word and put on my best Son Puppy Eyes™ imitation.

"Depends on what it is." Mike gave in.

"My uncle and I are interested in your interdimensional theory. Could you come over to my house later tonight and talk to us about it?"

"You've never showed any interest before, Bouke. Why the sudden surge?" Mike lifted an eyebrow at me and looked over the rim of his glasses in his best librarian look.

I chuckled, "Well, we've got some information that we think you might like."

"Really?" Mike's eyes lit up like a boy at Christmas. "I'll be over at 7."

"Catch ya then." I said as he peeled away and walked to his house. it was only a block from the high school. I waved good-bye to him and Vegeta just watched him go.

"He's the scholarly type, is he not?" Vegeta asked as we kept walking.

"Yeah, nose-in-a-book, twenty-four-seven." I sighed. "I call him 'Gohan' sometimes to make him laugh when he's down."

"Why would he be sad? He seems like a happy brat." That's when the fight started. We could hear the yelling and the shattering of glass from where we were, two houses away. "Ah, I see." Vegeta lapsed into a thoughtful silence.

"We met through the school councilor. Told us we both had the same type of problems and that maybe we should stop kidding ourselves that we were alone in the world." I laughed sarcastically. "Probably the only good thing that bastard's ever done for me or him. I think he was trying his hand at matchmaking but it didn't work out.  I was already with…" my voice trailed off and Vegeta glowered.

We walked in silence the rest of the way home and when we got there, well, frankly, we were surprised shitless.

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I'm wondering why both of my people have family problems? And what is with me and my characters having little brothers? And why am I obsessed with cliffies?

I got informed yesterday that this is the best, and funniest, of all my stories. Hm, I wasn't really shooting for humor when I began this but if Vegeta landed in anyone's room, yeah, funny shit would happen.

What's in Bouke's house? Is Leon gay? Will Veggie-chan find out about the hentai pics and the shower scene? *lol*

Stay tuned for the next chap of… **Another Boring Day… NOT!**

Disclaimer: I don't own Subway but Kami, do I love their food! BLTs without the T… *stomach rumbles* Damn it Subway! Why do you torture me?


	7. How the hell did they get here?

I took my key out of my pocket and opened the door. I walked in with Vegeta right behind me. With a sigh, I threw my book bag on the couch and plopped down. I had so much homework it wasn't even funny.

Then, two little kids appeared out of nowhere in a flash of orange light.

"What the hell?" I yelled, jumping to my feet.

"Dad!" a purple-haired blur hit Vegeta's right leg.

"Mr. Vegeta!" a black-haired blur hit his other. They both latched on like leeches.

"Get off me, brats!" Vegeta roared.

"Daddy! Mom and everyone were so worried when you disappeared so we gathered all the dragonballs cause no one could feel your ki anywhere and then Mom wished that you would come back but Shenlong said 'no' and it couldn't be done and then he went off talking about other universes and stuff so then we wished to be where you were so here we are!" the boy with lavender hair said in one big breath.

"GET OFF MY LEGS!" Vegeta's vein once more showed on his forehead. The two children looked like they knew something bad would happen if they didn't let go that instant so they reluctantly backed up a few feet, mumbling apologies. "Do your mothers know where you are?" Vegeta asked the chibis.

"Well…" the black-haired child put a hand behind his head and looked at his companion.

"Uh, not really." The purple-haired boy studied his feet.

"Brats! Do you know how much trouble this will put you in? The onna might even blame me for it!" Vegeta paced back and forth in the living room.

"Uh, Vegeta?" I said.

"What?" Vegeta looked at me.

"Is that… Are they… Goten and Trunks?" I asked, licking my lips nervously.

"Yes!" Vegeta snapped. That's when the door flew open and my brother barreled into me. I landed on my back with him straddling my stomach. "Reishi! Reishi! I went to school and I had the best day! I told everyone that the Saiyan no Ouji was over at my house!" My gutei's face fell. "But nobody believed me."

"Zar, you did no such thing." My eyes widened and I grabbed the little brat by the throat.

"Of course I didn't! What do you take me for? A baka?" He punched my shoulder playfully and then finally noticed the two chibis. "Wait a sec… Are they…" All the blood drained from his face and he fell over.

"Gutei?" I shook him. "Zar? You kidding?" I propped him up against the couch and walked into the kitchen. I got a glass of water and returned.

"Does he faint often?" Vegeta asked me sarcastically as I crouched down by my brother.

"No, he jokes about it often though." I splashed the water in his face. He came awake spluttering.

"What'd you do that for?" Then Zar remembered everything. "Oh, yeah." He looked at Goten and Trunks. "So they'll be here too until we can find a way to send them all home?"

"Yeah. That's what it looks like." I sighed and rubbed my temples. I could feel a headache coming: but the fun was only just starting. To give you a little insight, I've always preferred to call Goku 'Kakarot' though my brother likes Goku. He says it sounds better but I argue that Kakarot is his true name so he should be called that. We argue about it all the time.

Oh yes, anyway, the fun was just starting because that was the moment that Kakarot decided to show up. He just appeared out of nowhere using that Kami damned Instant Transmission thing he learned. I must have jumped at least two feet in the air. By this time, my nerves were as raw as meat that just got processed and I wasn't in the best of moods either.

"What the hell is Kakarot doing here?" I screamed like a banshee.

"Uh," the man in question grinned his Son Grin™ and said, "I came looking for Vegeta and the kids."

"But… but…" my little brother was overloading. Four characters from his favorite anime had appeared in his house on the same day. I could tell he was about to faint again.

"Gutei! Sit down now!" I yelled at him. He obeyed amazingly enough. "Now," I turned to the four visitors, "Kakarot, how'd you get here?"

"I used the Instant Transmission technique. After the chibis wished themselves here, I could still feel their ki though it was fading. So, after telling Bulma and Chi-chi where I was going, I came here." Kakarot explained. "Oh, yeah. Where is 'here' anyway?"

"You explain to them, Vegeta. I'm going to go take some Tylenol." I turned to go to the kitchen but what Vegeta said stopped me.

"I will not explain anything to that third-class baka and his spawn."

"Listen Vegetable Head…" I hissed, using that one term I knew the Prince hated. "You're the guest of my house and I don't give a damn whether or not you want to explain! But one way or another, you are going to while I get myself something to kill this fucking headache which you guys, by the way, so kindly bestowed on me!" I stormed into the kitchen and grabbed the Tylenol. I got out three tablets without looking at the directions. _So what if it kills me? That would be so much preferable to this little hell that has seemed to been brought down on my head. Oh Kami! What did I do to deserve this?_ I washed down the tablets with a glass of water.

As I walked back into the living room, I couldn't believe my ears. Vegeta was actually explaining the entire alternate universe deal to them! I sat down on the couch next to my brother and opened up my book bag. My brother had already started on his homework and he flashed me a smirk. _Damn brat knows his work is far easier then mine._ I pulled out my math book and started doing my homework. I didn't even want to think of what feeding two Saiyans and two demi-Saiyans would be like.

When Vegeta finally got fed up trying to explain to Kakarot and his brat, I pulled out the only DBZ tape I owned: Perfect Cell - Temptation. I hoped it would make the new three understand things a bit better. Trunks had picked up the whole bit in the first five minutes and now looked bored. A bored Saiyan, or demi-Saiyan, is a dangerous thing. I turned on the TV and popped the cassette into the VCR.

As the DBZ opening started up, the bright genius that was Kakarot exclaimed, "Hey! That's me!"

"Yeah, now shut up baka," growled Vegeta. "If you chatter the entire time, I'll kill you." Kakarot just grinned and the group settled down to watching the movie. As the first episode started, Trunks watched his future counterpart in, was it awe? Or maybe jealously? Hate? I couldn't tell really. I'm not very good at reading people's expressions.

When the tape reached the point where Cell proposed his challenge to Vegeta and Vegeta accepted, I glanced over at the Saiyan no Ouji. His countenance was hard for me to decipher. Was that actually _regret_ I was seeing? I blinked a few times and then nodded to myself. Yes, Vegeta really did regret accepting Cell's offer. Vegeta noticed me looking at him and his expression changed back to that of his usually heartless look. _Hey Vegeta._ I thought to him silently. _It's not such a bad thing to let people see your true self every once and a while._ I then mentally shook my head. No, Vegeta wouldn't be Vegeta if he didn't act the way he did.

Kakarot… Well, to tell you the truth, I've always hated that baka. He is just so stupid! He sat in front of the screen, staring at it in dumb fascination. His son was the same way. They were complete vegetables the entire time!

I sighed to myself and looked at the clock on the wall. 4:15 pm. I guessed I had better start cooking dinner. Wearily, I trudged into the kitchen and brought out the pots.

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Oiy! Cooking for FOUR Saiyans? I do NOT envy Bouke! Looks like she's got here work cut out for her!

BTW, I don't hate Kakarot. He just gets on my nerves.

I'd like to thank all you wonderful reviewers out there for all your reviews! I really appreciate it and I hope to hear more advice, suggestions, whatever from you! Things should now be just a little bit more crazy now that Goten, Trunks and Kakarot have entered the scene!


	8. A Shopping Trip? Great Fun!

I collapsed on a stool in the center of the kitchen and looked at the mess. There were dirty pots and pans everywhere. I glanced at all the food I had baked. A huge pot of rice, another large pot of macaroni and cheese, three whole chickens, and two large bowls of Ramen Noodle soup. I had left one bowl in a pot, on the stove with the setting at low. It was for later, if any of the Saiyans got hungry in the middle of the night, Kami forbid!

I tiredly walked out into the living room after moving all the food to the table and setting it up. I had convinced my brother to get out the four controller game system. He had also brought out a variety of four people games and not to our surprise, the DBZ guys wanted to play the one that starred them. They had picked themselves as their characters and now they were duking it out. My brother, not surprisingly, had chosen Vegeta as his character.

Speaking of the Prince, I didn't see him anywhere. I looked around the room closely and then spotted him. He was sitting in a chair in the corner of the room reading a book. I looked at the book closely. The cover was very familiar to me. I thought for a moment and then remembered. Vegeta was reading "Where the Wild Things Are"! I loved that book! The paper cover was torn and ripped but I still read it every once and a while. I almost laughed out loud. The Saiyan no Ouji was reading a five year-old's book!

"Everyone!" I called out and my gutei paused the game. "Dinner is ready!" I quickly moved out of the way as the Saiyans stampeded for the food. My brother followed at a more leisurely walk and I followed him.

They ate the food at a pace that could make people think that there was no tomorrow. I heaped my plate and made my brother do the same before all the food disappeared. I ate as quick as I could after I glanced at the clock. 5:45. If I could do some really quick shopping with Kakarot and the kids, I would be home before Mike arrived.

I finished my dinner and looked at the progress of the Saiyans. They were slowing down but still eating. I turned to Zar, "What's your teacher's phone number?" I asked him. He recited it to me and I wrote it down on my arm. I got up and dialed the number on the phone.

"Hello. This is the Griffon residence." My brother's teacher's voice said. She was a kind, elderly woman who enjoyed teaching the third graders and she was very fond of my little brother.

"Hi, Mrs. Griffon?" I said nervously.

"Yes that's me, " she answered, "and who might you be?"

"I'm Bouke Enda, Zaretu's older sister."

"Ah, yes. The little mischief maker," she chuckled, "what can I do for you, dear?"

"I was wondering if my brother would be able to bring his two cousins into class for the rest of the week. I know it's a big thing to ask but you see, my parents are out of town and my two uncles came for a visit and they both brought their sons with them." I waited for the answer with crossed fingers. I also hoped she didn't think I meant that Kakarot and Vegeta were gay. _Oh boy! That would piss the Saiyan no Ouji off more then anything!_

"I don't know, dear. It's an awfully big thing for me to do. Why can't their fathers watch them?"

"Well, my uncles are from different sides of the family but they really dislike each other and so I'm worried about what would happen if I left them alone in the house. I'm having to bring them to the high school with me. My teachers don't mind as long as they don't prove to be a distraction."__

"Ah, I see." Mrs. Griffon digested this information for a little. "Well, I guess I can take them on. As long as they are good and, as your teachers said, don't prove to be a distraction to my students."

"Thank you, Mrs. Griffon!"

"You're welcome, dear. Good-bye now."

"Have a pleasant evening! Good-bye!" I said cheerfully and hung up. I put my back to the wall and slide down till I sat on my ass. _Oh Kami… What if they blast a hole in the school?_

I stood up with a groan and walked into the dining room where everyone had finished eating and they all were just sitting there in bloated silence. _Ack! They had to be Saiyans!_ I thought to myself and began talking, "Okay, gutei! Clear off the table, put the dishes on the counter. You two," I pointed at Goten and Trunks as Zar rushed off to do my bidding, "get the dishes off the counter and put them in the dishwasher. If you drop a dish, I won't give you breakfast."

They paled visibly. "Yes, Bouke-sama!" Trunks gulped and flew into the kitchen. Goten followed him and they handled the dishes with the utmost respect you can have for dishes.

Kakarot stretched and stood up. "I think I'll go take a little na…"

"Nuh huh!" I said and stood in his way. I looked up at him. "Kakarot, stay right where you are." He froze. Vegeta sat back with a smirk. But I wasn't finished yet. "Vegeta! Wash the things that can't go through the dishwasher! Zar will show you which one's they are." 

"And why should I?" Vegeta asked insolently.

"What goes for the chibis, goes for you buddy." Vegeta did as I told him to. I turned to Kakarot. "Let me see your drivers license." I said. He felt around in his pockets for a few minutes but didn't find it. "Do you have it?"

"No," he said sheepishly. "I don't carry it around with me all the time."

"Okay. I'm driving then." I turned and looked into the kitchen. They were done. I checked the clock. It had only been 15 minutes since I last looked. "All right! Everyone outside!" I lead the way to the car. It was a five seater. I counted heads. Six of us. "Okay, two of the kids are going to have to double buckle. Trunks and Goten?"

"Okay." They said. I climbed into the drivers seat and Vegeta sat in the passenger seat as the rest of them piled into the back. I checked. Kakarot was having trouble buckling his seat belt.

"Gutei! Help him." I said and started the car. I backed out of the driveway and onto the street. Luckily, the mall was only five minutes away and my town was relatively small so the traffic wasn't so bad. On the way there, I explained to the three kids about what they were doing tomorrow. Gutei didn't look too happy with the prospect of being stuck with Goten and Trunks for the entire week. "I'm going to bake a batch of cookies for you to bring to her and if any of you eat one, I'll kill you." I threatened the Saiyans and my brother. They all nodded except Vegeta. I then managed to get all the Saiyans to promise not to blast or hurt anyone while they were here on Earth. That was a hard thing to get Vegeta to agree to, believe me!

We got out of the car and walked into the mall. My brother started toward the toy store but I grabbed the collar of his shirt and dragged him back. "This is going to be quick shopping trip. No detours. I'll bring anyone back tomorrow who wants to come back again." The three chibis looked delighted at the prospect of being let loose in the mall and they agreed to be on their best behavior. "Zar," I looked at my brother sternly as we walked into a clothing store, "go into the kids clothing department, help them pick out two outfits their size each and meet me back here in 20 minutes." I checked to make sure our watches were synchronized before sending the brats off. I just hoped to Kami my brother could keep them in line.

I turned back to Vegeta and Kakarot and brought them into the men's department. I brought along a shopping cart. I told them to pick out two outfits. Vegeta returned three minutes later with a black and a white muscle shirt and two pairs of the baggy type pants that were in style. Kakarot just wandered around. I stood with Vegeta and watched Kakarot for five minutes. "What's his problem?" I asked the Saiyan Prince.

"All he ever wears is that damn orange gi or clothes that his harpy mate picks out for him." Vegeta explained to me.

"Then go help him pick out clothes! We haven't got all day!" I said exasperatedly. Vegeta looked at my expression and stomped over to Kakarot. He grabbed the baka by the arm and within five minutes he had two shirts and two pairs of pants. I took the stuff and walked back to the entrance area that we had agreed to meet at. I checked my watch nervously. It had been almost sixteen minutes and the brats were nowhere to be found. I was really nervous and I had a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. Whenever I get that feeling, something's wrong.

I sighed. "Kakarot, Vegeta. Stay here with the shopping cart. I fear the brats might have got themselves into trouble."

I charged off into the kid's department and arrived in the shirt section just in time to see my gutei being dragged off by a security guard and two very pissed off looking chibis following him.

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What did Zar do that made the security guard mad? What's going to happen to Vegeta and Ka, I mean, Goku while Bouke isn't there? You guys know something's gotta happen to them, right? *evil giggle*

Yikes! Bouke sounds like a slavedriver!


	9. Damn Security Guards! I'll kill them all...

"Hey!" I shouted and skidded to a halt right next to the man. "What are you dragging my little brother away like that for?"

The security guard turned around and looked me over. He was a burly man with large arms and a hard look to his face. He looked like he dealt with shoplifters and angry customers every day. "This boy was acting suspicious. He was lugging a large amount of goods around and when I confronted him, he wouldn't tell me who his friends' parents were." The man said in a rough voice. I estimated Vegeta or Kakarot could take him down in five seconds and ten for the demi-Saiyans.

"Well, could you please let him go?" I asked the guard and then I gestured at the two chibis. "Our cousins' fathers are waiting by the cash registers."

The guard peered at me suspiciously. "Let me talk to them."

_What do I look like? A druggie? _"Okay." I said happily and grabbed the clothes from Goten and Trunks' hands. _Ah shit, ah shit, AWH SHIT! Please Vegeta and Kakarot! Act like normal humans!_ Alas, I should've known that Saiyans don't have the capacity to act 'normal'.

When the guard asked Vegeta for his name, Vegeta of course answered, "I am the Saiyan no Ouji, Prince Vegeta." The guard gave him an odd look and then turned to ask Kakarot the same question. He still held my gutei's arm in a firm grip. "Son Goku!" Kakarot replied cheerfully.

I dropped the boys' clothes into the basket as the guard asked, "Well, can I see some identification?"

"Uh," Kakarot looked to me for help while Vegeta just stood and looked aloof.

"Sorry, sir, but neither of my uncles own a driver's license or I.D. of any kind. They got their wallets stolen by pickpockets. We were going to get them a new card right after this shopping trip." I explained, hoping my story was believable.

"Oh really? The place where you get I.D.s is closed after five o'clock."

"What?" I checked my watch. "Argh! I told you three not to spend all that time in the toy shop!" I yelled at Trunks, Goten and Zar.

"But we didn't…" Trunks slapped a hand over Goten's mouth to shut him up. Thankfully, the guard didn't notice that slipup.

"Okay. Get some identification soon then. I presume your driving?" he said to me and released my brother. I noticed that his teeth were stained yellow and lined with black. His breath was horrid. As I avoided gagging, I nodded and showed him my driver's license. He smiled and I got another gut-wrenching view of his teeth. "Well, kid. Just a little advice for you," He put a fatherly hand on my shoulder and I noticed he had really terrible body-odor, "lay off the drugs. They're bad for you." He sauntered off.

That's when I noticed his uniform wasn't real. Kakarot had to hold me down to keep me from ripping the bastard's throat out. Zar collapsed on his knees and began having a nasty attack of the dry heaves. I felt awfully sorry for him. I would have hated to have that guy have a grip on my arm for that long and have to stand his BO. Goten and Trunks apologized for not blasting the guy when he first grabbed Zar but they reminded me that I had extracted a promise from them not to hurt anyone.

Finally, after I had regained my composure and that took me a good minute and a half, I pushed the cart into the register line that was nonexistent. I put all the clothes up on the counter and the lady behind it rung it all up. My eyes nearly burst out of my skull when I looked at the total. It was over two hundred dollars! I sighed and pulled out my money. "Things don't come cheap these days, now do they?" I said to myself as I gave the money to the lady. She smiled sympathetically and gave me back the change.

I picked up one of the bags while Kakarot helpfully picked up the other two. Vegeta, of course, didn't even offer to carry one. We walked back to the car and put the clothes bags in the trunk. We all piled in and after Kakarot had help with his seat belt again, I drove away.

When we reached the house, I had Zar go and get a sleeping bag from the garage. I explained that one of the adults would be sleeping on the couch. Vegeta immediately stomped back to my parents' bedroom with his clothes and locked the door. I looked at Kakarot. "You mind?"

"Looks like I don't have a choice." Kakarot said with a shrug and grinned. I shook my head and checked the clock. Twenty more minutes till Mike said he'd arrive. I stretched and flopped down in my dad's chair. Zar had taken Goten and Trunks back to his room and I could here them having a pillow fight or something resembling one. I shut my eyes and leaned my head back against the headrest. I was so tired! I decided I'd go to bed as soon as I possibly could.

Suddenly, a rumbling shook the living room. I shot to my feet and wildly looked around. Kakarot was blushing from where he sat on the couch. "Don't tell me!" I said with a sigh, "I can guess. You're hungry, right?"

"Yep!" Kakarot grinned the goofy grin he always had.

"There's a pot of soup on the stove." I said then thought better. I got up and turned the stove off, then got out one of the larger bowls and served Kakarot some soup. Like hyenas to a carcass, the demi-Saiyans arrived. I served them too and then Vegeta, who was close behind them.

I looked in the empty pot and then shook my head. I put it in the dishwasher and started it. The doorbell rang. _Will my entire week be nonstop work?_ I asked myself as I went to answer it.

There stood good old Mike, right on the dot. "Mike, you're never late, you're never early and bugs the hell out of me." I said with a grin and ushered him in.

"Yes, well, you make up for what I lack in that department." Mike laughed as he walked into the house, shouldering his heavy-looking backpack.

"Want anything?" I asked him.

"Anything to drink?" he asked.

"Milk, lemonade, coke…" I rattled off all of the possibilities.

"Uh, how about water." He blinked, looking lost. My smile widened and I lead him into the dining room where the Saiyans were eating with my brother watching, a bemused look on his face. Mike sat down without noticing everyone else and pulled out a few books. "So, what exactly do you wish to know?" he asked without looking up as he flipped open one of the covers.

"Is interdimensional or alternate universe traveling possible?" I asked bluntly as I set his water down on the table and sat in the seat next to him.

Mike's head jerked up and he looked at me with an odd stare. Then he noticed Kakarot, Vegeta, Trunks, Goten and my gutei. "Hey all." He said nervously. Mike doesn't like meeting a lot of strange people at one time, you see.

"And you are?" Zar asked. "I'm Bouke's brother."

"Mike." Mike rubbed his neck as he had a habit of doing when he in uncomfortable.

"I'm Goku and this is my son, Goten." Kakarot said happily, placing a hand on Goten's shoulder. Goten smiled.

"I'm Trunks. Vegeta's my dad." Trunks grinned.

_Wham!_ Mike was out of his chair and also out cold. I glared at the surrounding people. "Way to go!" I said sarcastically and attempted to wake up Mike as Vegeta snickered.

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Whoa! I guess Mike didn't take that too well, now did he? *lol* First the 'guard' and now this happens to Mike! I'm so mean to my characters! I'm really updating quick lately, huh? But, you all love people who do that so I guess it's okay.

Tanx to all you who review and for the people that put me on their faves list! *sniffe* You all are so nice to me!


	10. Bouke! What's he doing in your room?

When Mike came around, he looked at me kind of funny for a moment. "Know what, Bouke?" he said in a slurred voice as he got to his feet.

"What Mike?" I put a hand on his arm to steady him.

"I had the weirdest kind of daydream a few seconds ago. I dreamt some people who looked like DBZ characters were over at your house claiming to be people from the show. Weird, huh?" Mike hadn't noticed the group yet.

"Uh, Mike? It was a real dream." I said. Mike looked at me sharply and then noticed the people finally. "They are from DBZ."

"Ahhhhh!" he jumped back and picked up a heavy book threateningly, "I don't know who you are but whatever drugs you are on, I don't want any!"

"Mike. Calm down, buddy." I said soothingly, "I am not on any drugs. Why would I be?"

"Not you Bouke! Those potheads!" Mike was hyperventilating by this point.

"I have had enough of this foolishness, baka!" Vegeta phased from where he stood to behind Mike. He lifted Mike up by the upper arms and Mike dropped the book he was holding. Vegeta slammed him down in his former seat and growled, "And stay there!" he stormed back to his seat and sat down, keeping an eye on Mike the entire time.

"Whoa." Mike shook his head and looked at me suspiciously, "How can you prove they are the people from Dragonball Z?"

"Ask them questions that would prove to you that they are. Or have them blast something." I shrugged. "Whatever you want but if you choose the latter, have them blast the school."

Mike chuckled weakly and then looked at Vegeta, "If you're Vegeta, then why did you sacrifice yourself to try and kill Majin Buu?"

"W-well… It was because… I DON'T HAVE TO ANSWER THESE BAKA QUESTIONS AND NEVER, EVER, EVER MENTION THAT EVENT AGAIN!" Vegeta roared and fell silent. Trunks looked a little crestfallen at Vegeta's outburst over that certain happening.

Mike lifted an eyebrow and turned to Kakarot, "If you're Goku, then who killed your Grandpa Gohan?"

Kakarot's face fell, "It was a monster."

"I see." Mike looked at Goten and Trunks. "I dunno what to ask you two." He took a deep breath and sighed. "But, I believe the others you I guess I can believe you both. It's not like somehow getting confirmation from you will change anything."

"How did their answers make you believe them?" Zar asked, cocking his head to one side inquisitively.

"Well…" Mike took a breath.

"Don't get him started." I warned Zar.

Mike grinned at me. "Yes, I'll just summarize it for you. It wasn't only the answers. I also used their facial expressions and other body language to identify them to myself. Now," he picked up the heavy textbook from where it had lain on the floor, "Bouke? You wish to know if alternate universe traveling is possible?"

"Well, yeah. I guess." Bouke nodded.

"We know that it is because they're here. Now, I wonder if we will be able to send them back." Mike thumbed through his book and then set it down. He thumbed through another and then another. Meanwhile, the boys and Kakarot had left to play their game that was still paused and Vegeta was looking impatient.

"Mike? Anything?" Bouke asked.

"Sorry, Bouke but I can't help you." Mike closed his books and looked at Bouke apologetically.

"What?" Vegeta hissed. "You don't know how to get us out of this universe?"

"I'm sorry but I'm not a wizard and I'm afraid none of them exist on our world." Mike shrugged. "I guess you'll have to find some alternative means of getting back."

"Thanks for your help, Mike." Bouke said as Vegeta stood up seething. Vegeta lunged at the scholarly lad and grabbed him by the next. "Vegeta! Let him go!"

"You need to find a way to send me home!" Vegeta yelled as he shook Mike by the neck. "I will not be stuck on this hellhole of a planet with no one to fight but the brats and Kakarot!"

"Bouke…" Mike gasped, scratching at Vegeta's hand helplessly.

"Vegeta! Kami damn it, put him down! He tried!" Bouke attacked Vegeta with her fists by the Saiyan no Ouji was gradually squeezing the life out of her friend. "KAKAROT!"

"What is it?" Kakarot rushed in and saw Vegeta. "Vegeta! Put the boy down!" Kakarot grabbed Vegeta's hands off Mike's neck and then pushed the boy away. "Vegeta! Remember that we all promised not to kill anyone?" Kakarot yelled at Vegeta as he stood between him and his target.

"I will not keep such a promise!" Vegeta tried to push by Kakarot but the other Saiyan blocked his path. "Move you baka!"

"I won't let you hurt Mike! I'll fight you first!"

"All right! Bring it on!" Vegeta readied a small ki blast that grew with every passing second.

I realized the danger to my house immediately. "Whoa boys! Calm down!" I pushed in between the two Saiyans, "Vegeta, you will not fight with Kakarot in my house!"

"Then we will take this outside!" Vegeta yelled.

"No! You will not fight at all!" I screamed. I could feel my temper rising and I began to breath heavily. "If you do, I will kill you."

"You couldn't if you tried." Vegeta said smugly.

"That's beside the point…" I muttered and tried to think of a new threat that would work. "I won't feed you."

"I will just raid a store or some other human's house." Vegeta smirked at me.

"KAMI DAMN IT! JUST DON'T FIGHT OR ELSE I WILL BECOME VERY PISSED OFF!" I felt like I could kill someone at that moment. Preferably Vegeta.

"Calm down, ikeike." Vegeta mumbled and walked away. He had a strangely thoughtful look on his face, like he had just eaten something and he couldn't decide if it was sour or sweet. I watched him go with a confused expression. Why did he just leave like that? I glanced at Kakarot. He had the exact same look on his usually jovial face.

"What's up, Kakarot?" I asked.

"I… can't… don't… get it." He walked off, looking at the ceiling. That was a bad move. He tripped over a toy my brother had left out and fell flat on his face. Mike and I burst out laughing.

"He is pretty wild, huh?" Mike asked me.

"Yeah. You should've been there when we went shopping." I told him the whole crazy story about the 'guard'.

"Oh yeah! That's Mall Mad Marvin. He hangs around the mall doing that to everyone." Mike broke into a fresh round of  laughing. Mike hung around for a few more hours. He and I discussed schoolwork, Dragonball Z, the school play that was coming up and other big things that were happening.

Finally, he admitted to be over two hours overdue to be home. "Mike, you really should move in here or something. You spend enough time over here already." I laughed as he moved toward the door.

"Hey, maybe I could spend the week over here. I'm a fair cook, as you know and you could use some help in the kitchen. I'll bring some foodstuffs with me." Mike answered. I agreed. We had known each other since second grade and had been spending nights at each other's houses for years. Our parents believed that familiarity breeds contempt so they guessed we wouldn't try anything.

Mike left and returned a half hour later with his stuff. He knew the drill and put his stuff in my room. That's when Vegeta approached me. "What's he doing in your room?" he growled.

"He's spending the week over here." I answered with a shrug.

"Yes, but in your _room_?" Vegeta sounded almost… protective. _Oh Kami._ My mind met with a thought it didn't like at all. _What if he begins to take this 'uncle' stuff seriously? No! There'll go my chance at him!_

"We've done it since I was in second grade." I said, trying not to let my thoughts transfer to my voice.

"Really?" Vegeta lifted an eyebrow and I was struck by how immensely sick my last line had sounded.

"Hey! Not like that!" I howled. He looked a little confused and then realized what I was meaning. His face took on a shade of pink that was not becoming on him and he walked away muttered something that I think went something like, "Human bakas! Thinking sick all the time. Kami, I did not need that image!"

_There you went and screwed up his mind for the rest of the night! Nice one, Bouke! Sheesh! Making him think you and Mike have been making the Beast with Two Backs since you were only eight or so… Kami!_ I berated myself thoroughly as I went back to my room to sleep. Mike was already camped out with his stuff strewn everywhere. "Mike, you know the rules." I said as I crawled into my bed.

"Make sure you're up before I turn off the alarm and don't take on after Master Roshi or Oolong." Mike chuckled and crawled into his sleeping bag. I grinned and turned off the light.

Vegeta gestured for Kakarot to come over. "Kakarot, did you notice what I did?"

"If you mean the surge in her ki, yeah. I noticed all right. Hard to miss." Kakarot scratched the back of his head thoughtfully.

"I wonder why she had such a high ki for a human." Vegeta mused aloud.

"Maybe she's not human." Kakarot joked. Vegeta glanced at him sharply and then walked off. _What's eating him?_ Kakarot wondered as he watched Vegeta walk back to 'his' room. Kakarot shrugged and wandered into the kitchen. He was hungry and he decided to have an early night snack.

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Now where the hell did that come from? *tries to remember when she decided to make Bouke have a larger ki level then normal* I guess it was inspiration or something… Is Vegeta taking the 'uncle' bit seriously? NO! There goes Bouke's chance!! Bouke does have an awfully sick mind! Tanx again to the reviewers who are new and those who have come back!

6Dark6Angel6: Here are the translations for you: chibi: kid, little. Saiyan no Ouji: Prince of Saiyans. gutei: my foolish, little brother. –sama: is a term of respect usually used for royalty. reishi: your elder sister.


	11. Kakarot, Trunks & Goten's First Day of S...

I woke up early and Mike and I managed to get a big enough breakfast to feed all the Saiyans and ourselves sufficiently. "Mike," I groaned, "I'm going to need to do some major grocery shopping this afternoon."

"I know." Mike obviously regretted volunteering to help me now. We set the table with the four-foot tall pancake and waffle platters and I put a few sliced watermelons with them. My family had eaten a lot before so we did have quite an amount of food but we never had enough to supply four Saiyans for a week. I sighed and collapsed in a seat. Mike did the same and we just sat there for a few moments, savoring the time of no activity.

Suddenly, the buzzer to let me know about the cookies went off. I jumped up and ripped open the oven. They were perfect. Crisp, golden, and the chocolate was at just the right temperature and gooiness. I split one with Mike and we ate that in silent companionship. The silence didn't last for long though.

The three chibis ran in and as one, attacked the food. I couldn't believe my eyes. Zar was keeping up with the two demi-Saiyans as they ate. The food began to rapidly deplete when Vegeta and Kakarot appeared. Vegeta looked at me appraisingly and then ate.

Mike looked at me also questioningly and I just shrugged. Mike took that as an answer and he ate half a watermelon before getting up to take a shower and get dressed. I collect all my school stuff while he was in there and then I got in.

By the time I was done, Zar was knocking down the door. Thank Kami we had the deal where someone could take a shower in my bathroom and also in my parents'. The Saiyans were using that one while we used this one. I got dressed and let Zar in. He began to strip as I left. I sighed and averted my eyes. _Is it going to be this hectic the entire time?_ I asked myself as I put my school stuff by the door.

Then, I remembered lunches. "SHIT!" I bellowed. "Goten! Trunks?"

Trunks came running. "What's the matter?" he asked me.

"Do you have any capsules on you?" I asked, crossing my fingers.

"Yeah. Three, why?" Trunks answered.

"Would they be enough to hold Goten and you lunches?"

"Yeah." He handed the capsules to me and I eyed them. I knew how they worked as I had watched almost every episode of Dragonball Z.

"Okay." I looked him over. He was still in his pajamas. They featured him of course. "Go get dressed." I checked the clock as he followed my instructions. It was 7. I still had to take the little guys to the supermarket to get them food.

Fifteen minutes later, everyone was ready. We threw all the backpacks into the trunk of the car, as there would be no room for them in the passenger section. I got into the driver's seat of the car as Vegeta got into the passenger seat. Mike got into the middle seat of the back seat and Kakarot set his son on his lap. Trunks and Zar ended up sharing a seat. As we drove to the store, everyone complained about the cramped positions. Everyone except Vegeta of course.

We hurried into the store and I grabbed a cart. "Goten? Trunks? You like grape jelly?"

"Yeah." They both nodded.

"Okay, Zar, take the two kids. Each of you pick a 2 liter bottle of soda and then return." He nodded and led the two demi-Saiyans off. "Mike, go get two jars of peanut butter and two of grape jelly." Mike dashed away toward the aisle with the condiments. I dragged Kakarot and Vegeta with me to the bread aisle. I grabbed four loafs off the shelf and then grabbed six different, large bags of chips from farther down the aisle.

"Bouke!" Zar put his bottle in the cart carefully then did the same with the other two. Mike arrived and put the four jars in.

"Kids, if you see anything else you want, you better spit it out now!" I called out as I pushed the cart toward the short line.

"Here!" Goten threw a bag of candy in.

"Yeah!" Trunks threw in another bag and was about to go get more but I stopped him.

"That's enough!" I tapped my foot hurriedly as the cashier started checking the stuff.

"You providing snack for the little kids' class?" he asked me in a conversational tone.

"Yeah, but I forgot about it last night so here we are, getting it now, thirty minutes from when school starts." I grinned.

"I know how it is."

"But, Bouke. I thought…" Zar tackled Goten before he could say anything about eating it all themselves. Trunks then tackled Zar and they started rolling around in the cashier's line. Luckily, we were the only ones in it now. Vegeta snorted at the kids' lack of dignity and Kakarot laughed at them as they giggled and tickled each other.

I gave the cashier my credit card that I only used in emergencies. I needed to withdraw more cash soon. I signed the receipt and we carted all the stuff out into the near-empty parking lot. I capsuled it all and gave the three capsules to my brother to keep. "Your teacher lets you eat outside, right?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, then find a nice, hidden area and don't let anyone see the amount of food you have."

"Right." We piled into the car again but when Trunks went to sit in the back seat, I told him to sit up in his father's lap like Goten was sitting in Kakarot's. He looked at me like I was crazy.

"Do it, brat. It's too crowded back there anyway." Vegeta said. Trunks looked at his father like Vegeta had suddenly grown another head but he did it anyway. The school was only four minutes away so Trunks didn't have to be uncomfortable for long. During the drive, I snuck a few glances at Vegeta. He just sat with a stolid look on his face.

When we reached the school, Zar, Trunks and Goten ran out and grabbed their backpacks. I told Zar to give the cookies to his teacher and not to drop the plate. He said he wouldn't and then they scrambled off to Zar's classroom.

I drove away, dreading the school day. _It was bad enough with Vegeta but with Kakarot too? Why me, Kami? Why me…_

Zar ran down the hallway, bowling over a first grader and knocking down a kindergarten. He shouted apologies over his shoulder as he arrived at his classroom. He ran a hand through his hair and checked on Goten and Trunks. The two other boys were looking at the pictures on the walls. "Come on." Zar said and led them into the classroom. He walked up to Mrs. Griffon. "Hi Mrs. Griffon. Here's some cookies for you." He gave her the cookie platter.

"Oh. You're so sweet, Zaretu. Now, when class starts, you can introduce your cousins to us." She replied, smiling at his 'cousins'. They smiled nervously back and Goten put his hand behind his head sheepishly. Zar shouldered his bag and grabbed Trunks and Goten by their forearms and dragged them back to his seat that was in the back row, thank Kami.

"Okay. Don't do anything that's not normal." Zar said as simply as he could.

"But what's normal and what's not?" Goten asked.

"Gah! Just… just… think things over before you do them." Zar answered, scratching his head furiously.

"We can do that!" Trunks said confidently.

"I hope so." Zar dragged two chairs over to his seat and put one on each one side of him. He was beginning to have a bad feeling about this day as his class milled around.

"Be seated you motley bunch of ruffians. School is starting." Mrs. Griffon said over the din. Quickly, the 'motley' bunch of children sat down amid chuckles. Mrs. Griffon was considered a wonderful teacher as she had the ability to think as her children would and they would talk to her and tell her their problems like they would to their best friend. "Zar? Would you please introduce your cousins?"

"Sure." Zar sat up on the back of his chair, leaving his feet on his seat. Goten and Trunks just stood up. "These are my cousins, Goten and Trunks." Zar laughed nervously as some of his classmates raised their eyebrows at the odd names. A lot of the girls had noticed that the two boys had more muscle then was normal for children their ages. "My uncles are Dragonball Z freaks."

"Yeah. My dad even made me dye my hair." Trunks said, with a grin. The class let out a few tentative chuckles. Goten began to speak and Zar fixed him with a cold look. 

Goten changed what he was saying, "Our dads… we come from another state." He said recalling something that Zar said about 'states'.

"Welcome to Alaska then." Mrs. Griffon said warmly.

"Thanks." All three boys sat down again and Mrs. Griffon told everyone to take out their math books.

_Well, this day might not turn out very bad after all._ Zar thought happily as he showed Goten and Trunks what they were doing, _What ever happens though, I know Bouke's gonna have a worse day then I could possibly have._

At that moment, Kakarot and Vegeta were working overkill to get me to English on time. Mike had left to go to his first class, Science. The horde of girls that were attacking them was amazing. Girls begging me for their phone numbers were even attacking me. "That's it!" Vegeta roared. He turned and hissed something in Kakarot's ear and Kakarot nodded. Vegeta picked me up by my waist and Kakarot did the same to Rachel. They leapt over the crowd of girls and then ran all the way to my first class, which was English again. Vegeta put me down quickly and Kakarot did the same to Rachel. He tried to pry her off him but she was busy feeling his chest muscles.

"My God Bouke! If all the guys in your family are built like these two, invite me to the family reunion!" Rachel called out as she finally, reluctantly, let go of Kakarot. Then, I steeled myself for anything as we walked into the hellhole.

"Why hello Ms. Enda. And who have we here?" Ms. Piers eyed Kakarot. "Another uncle of yours?"

I nearly groaned. "Yes." I hurried Kakarot and Vegeta over to my seat where I placed two extra chairs. "Kakarot, don't say anything stupid." I hissed.

"Sure! That'll be easy!" Kakarot placed his hand behind his head and grinned. I knew my day was going to be worse then the one before.

As class started, Ms. Piers rushed through roll call yet again and then looked Kakarot up and down. "Please introduce to us your other uncle."

"This is my uncle Kakarot. He does martial arts and is _married_." I stressed the word but Ms. Piers didn't take the hint.

"Mr. Kakarot. Please tell us more." She batted her eyelashes at him.

Kakarot stood up, oblivious to her advances, "Well, like my, uh, niece said, I study martial arts and I am married. I have entered in the World Tournament a few times. Though I don't usually go by my name Kakarot. I use my middle name, Goku." He sat down and grinned at me. I was beating my head against the table. _Why did he mention the World Tournament? Why me, Kami? Why, why, why, why, why?_

"Thank you for that introduction, Mr. Goku." Ms. Piers opened the English book and we picked up from where we had left off the other day.

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Jeril: Muwhahahaha! You get to hear about what happens in both Zar and Bouke's classes! Have you noticed that the chaps are becoming longer? Aren't I nice? Actually, it's because you people are giving me so many reviews! I'm not the nice one, you'll are!

Vegeta: Why is the slut ogling Kakarot? She should notice that I am much better then that pathetic, third-class baka will ever be!

Jeril: She just doesn't have good tastes! *bats her eyes at Vegeta. Vegeta looks scared*

Kakarot: *scratches his head for a few seconds* Wait a minute… That's a diss on me!

Vegeta: Took you long enough to figure it out…

Jeril: Shut up you two and let me do my author note! *Vegeta and Kakarot be quiet* Okay, if you have any good suggestions PLEASE tell me! I'm having Kakarot have a funny encounter with the male Science teacher in the next chap during the study of muscles. _Just to let you know, I have nothing against gays._ Also, the spelling in the title of this chap was intentional! You'll understand in the next chap!


	12. Duck duck deltoid!

Zar smiled. The first thing for the day was a spelling quiz! He was good at that! He lined up with his classmates and Goten was in front of him and Trunks behind him. The words were easy ones; eye, dog, cat, frog, fork, spoon. Then they got harder. Soon, only Shane, Goten, Zar, Trunks, and Janie were left.

"Shane. Please spell 'basket'." Mrs. Griffon asked.

"Uh… B, A, S… K, E, T." Shane said.

"That's correct. Now, Goten. Spell 'school'."

"S, K, O, O, L." Goten spelled and grinned.

"I'm sorry Goten. That's wrong. Please sit down."

"But… can I please try again?" Goten tried to use the Son Puppy Eyes™ on Mrs. Griffon but forty years of teaching had made her strong.

"I'm sorry Goten. Please sit down." She said firmly. In awe, Goten went and sat down in his seat. Mrs. Griffon was perhaps the only person in both his world and this one who could resist the Son Puppy Eyes™.

"Now, Zar. Spell 'building'." Mrs. Griffon grinned at him. She knew it was a hard one and she was challenging him.

"Let me think for a moment… B, I, L, D… I, N, G." Zar looked at Mrs. Griffon hopefully.

"No. Sorry Zar." Zar sat down obediently. "Trunks, spell 'classroom'."

"C, L, A, S, S, R, O, O, M." Trunk said.

"That's very good." Mrs. Griffon turned to Janie. "Spell 'novel'."

"N, O, V… I… E, L." Janie spelled with a stutter.

"No. I'm sorry Janie. Sit down please." Janie sat down at her seat, looking like she was about to cry. "These are very hard ones, boys. Shane, please spell 'vitamin'."

"V, I, T, A, M, E, N." Shane said confidently. He knew he would win. He did every time and he believed even Trunks couldn't beat him!

"Sorry Shane. That's incorrect." Shane's expression dropped. He looked pissed. Zar chuckled to himself. "Now class, if Trunks can't spell his word right, Shane will go again. If Trunks does, he wins. Trunks, spell 'domino'."

Trunks took a deep breath, "D, O, M, I, N, O."

"Very good! Trunks wins!" Mrs. Griffon pulled out a lollipop from her desk. "Here you are, dear."

"Thanks." Trunks dashed back to his seat to eat his sucker. 

I grabbed Kakarot and Vegeta and tried to haul them out of the classroom before Ms. Piers could say my name. _Tried_, is the key word there. "Ms. Enda?"

"Yes, Ms. Piers?" I said, trying not to let myself snarl.

"Please allow me to talk to your uncle more." She practically purred.

"Sorry Ms. Piers but I have to go to my next class." I hauled Vegeta and Kakarot out of there before she could stop me.

"Why wouldn't you let me talk to her?" Kakarot asked me naively.

"She's after your hide." I answered, fighting the crowd.

"Why? Is she a hunter?"

"No, you baka! She wants you as a mate!" Vegeta growled while stepping in front of me to help clear the path. By now, people had heard about his foul temper and they cleared out of his way.

"But I already have a mate. Bouke said that." Kakarot scratched the back of his head. "Ms. Piers heard that."

"She doesn't care!" I snarled at him. "Use your head Kakarot! Sometimes you're so thick it amazes even me!" I remembered the next class. "Vegeta! Left here! And the third door on the right!"

"Wait a minute!" Vegeta stopped in front of the Science class and turned to glare at me. "We are going in there?"

"Yeah. Why wouldn't we?" I thought a moment and then remembered. "Oh Vegeta. Mr. Eveans is harmless."

"To females!" Vegeta hissed. "You humans have an annoying habit of asking questions and then answering them."

"Oh, shut up Vegetable Head and come on." I muttered and dragged Kakarot into the classroom. Vegeta followed without any additional coaxing but he had a look fixed on his face that could have curdled milk if he had seen any.

As I sat down with him and Kakarot sitting in seats on both sides of me, he growled back, "Do not call me that abominable name."

"And why not… Veggie-chan?" I said with a smirk that disturbingly resembled his.

"I will not tolerate those pet names." Vegeta snarled back at me.

"Oh come on Veggie, loosen up."

"I. Will. Not." I could hear the anger ringing in his voice. I realized he would probably destroy the school if I did not give in.

"Fine. Be that way Vegeta…" I muttered and pulled out my Science book. Mr. Eveans was studying both Kakarot and Vegeta. I looked at both of them myself. Vegeta was looking at the ceiling while Kakarot was looking around the classroom; blissfully unaware of the interest he was sparking in my teacher. I struggled to hold in my chuckles as Rachel sat down next to me. She winked broadly at me and I grinned back. We knew what was about to happen.

Mr. Eveans called for order. "Now class. Today we will be studying muscles. I…"

"But Mr. Eveans," I said loudly from where I was seated, "Yesterday we were studying the eye…" Disaster or something similar was heading my way. I could feel it.

"Well, I have decided to leave that section for later. Now, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted," Mr. Eveans fixed me with a threatening stare, "I will need a volunteer." He looked around the classroom, judging people, or so it seemed. "Bouke, would you please ask your uncle to come up." Vegeta stood up sharply. "The one who just arrived today."

Kakarot glanced at me and I shrugged. "Go on Kakarot. It's for school so whatever the teacher says goes." Vegeta looked extremely relieved as Kakarot walked up to the front of the classroom.

"Mr. Kakarot, is it?" Mr. Eveans asked.

"No. Kakarot's my first name but I go by Goku." Kakarot said.

"All right then, would you please remove your shirt." Mr. Eveans said. I noticed he was having a tough time not smiling.

"Sure." Kakarot innocently pulled off his shirt and all the girls in the class began drooling.

"God…The muscles…"

"I'm going to pass out from the good view…"

"Just let me get near him…"

"Oh, if I could have just _five_ minutes with that hunk…" These and other strange, and disturbing, comments came from my classmates. I had to admit though. Kakarot didn't look too bad. Mr. Eveans obviously thought the same thing.

"Now, if you will be so kind as to flex your muscles." Kakarot did as the teacher asked. Mr. Eveans pointed to Kakarot's bulging shoulder muscle. I could tell he was restraining himself from touching Kakarot. I could understand and almost admired the man's control. "This is the deltoid, class. Please make note of all these." He moved his hand to Kakarot's upper arm. "These are the biceps." He went on, pointing out every muscle visible and naming them. He did this for the entire class period, going over each one five times.

When class ended, groans went around as Kakarot put his shirt back on. Mr. Eveans even joined in on the disappointed murmurs. I glanced over at Rachel's notebook. She had a pretty good drawing of Kakarot that she had doodled. I looked at the notebook of girl in front of me. I gagged.

The drawings were so obscene that I nearly threw up! I decided not to mention it to Kakarot. Vegeta, though, had already seen them and he was smirking at me and at the obviously perverted thoughts that would follow such images. I flipped him off as we walked out of my classroom.

I checked my schedule. Two more, hopefully uneventful, classes left till lunch. I looked at those after and nearly had a heart attack. Two fucking periods of _physical education_! There went my life. Washing down the Drain of Life.

With a downtrodden air to myself, I trudged down the hall to my next class.

Zar smacked his head against the wall again. The first two classes of the day had gone horribly! After the spelling bee, Goten and Trunks had gone off to a corner to play with wooden blocks. In the second class, they had become bored and so they had began to eat the lunch that Bouke had bought for them. They had eaten it all! Zar smashed his head against the wall again.

"Zar, honey. This isn't the end of everything." Mrs. Griffon's kind voice said.

"Yes, it is!" Zar howled and turned around to look at her. She was standing by him in the corner where he had been secluding himself for the entire thirty minutes of recess.

"No. Death is the end of everything." Mrs. Griffon smiled at him. "Please join your classmates in their games. Your cousins are currently playing a good rousing game of duck-duck-goose and they seem to be enjoying themselves immensely."

"Have they been picked yet?" Zar muttered, rubbing his aching head.

"No."

"Then that's the reason!" Zar ran past Mrs. Griffon and to the door leading outside. He ran out the door and to the circle where the game was being played. A little girl named Shelly was It.

"Duck… duck…. duck…" she put her hand on Janie's head, then Gregory's, then Shane's. She was approaching Goten and Trunks. "Duck… Goose!" she took off running as Goten stood and blurred after her. He caught her in less then a second while Zar was hitting his head with his fist in frustration.

"Gotcha!" he called out with a laugh. "Now you have to be in the pot!" Shelly looked a little confused at how Goten had gone so fast but she shrugged and went to the 'pot'. Zar squeezed into a gap in the circle and began waving at Trunks. Trunks noticed his frantic wavings and grinned. "Don't… Fly…" Zar mouthed and did hand motions also. Trunks' grin disappeared and he nodded.

"Goose!" Goten yelled and hit Zar on the head. Hard. Goten blurred over to his empty space while Zar fell over with a crash. Zar saw stars dancing around his head in pretty patterns.

"Zar?" Trunks' voice echoed around in his head. "Are you okay?"

"Stars…" Zar whispered and felt himself being picked up by Trunks. "Colors…" Trunks brought him back through the door and to his desk. He sat him down and waved a hand in front of his face.

"Zar? You going to be okay?" Goten asked. He had come in also but the other third graders had continued on with their game, ignorant of the pain of their classmate. "What's wrong with them? Don't they care?"

"Oh… Them. Yeah, they care." Zar was beginning to see straight but he closed his eye anyway. "But they just are a little… not understanding of pain and death and stuff. To them, it's still video games and things." Zar opened his eyes and smiled, albeit he was a little cross-eyed, but he could still see relatively fine.

"Good to see that you can see." Trunks said with a smile.

"Sorry Zar." Goten blushed faintly. "I forgot that you humans are less strong then us and more fragile."

"But what I don't get…" Trunks pursed his lips thoughtfully, "is that fact you recovered that quickly. That hit would've put most humans or even other species out for an hour or two at least."

"My mom's always said I've got a hard head!" Zar grinned and Goten and Trunks chuckled. "Goten, don't go really fast or fly, okay?"

"Sure Zar! Let's go play with the building blocks!" the three boys ran off.

Mrs. Griffon's brow furrowed from where she had stood. Even though she was a little old, she still had quite good hearing and she had heard their entire conversation and was puzzled by it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: Vegeta and Bouke's relationship won't turn to getting too friendly. I already have something about Bouke's love life planned out. *giggle* Kami damn! I spelled both 'vitamin' and 'domino' wrong when I wrote them down! *blushes* I even had a domino box right in front of me!! I'm so stupid!

Vegeta: You got that right!

Kakarot: Vegeta, that's not nice!

Vegeta: Shut up Kakarot!

Jeril: Thank you. Ikeike means 'bitch', I'm pretty sure. Now, once again, any ideas, tell me! Sorry Drogan but Vegeta can't blow up the school. 

Vegeta: *glares at Jeril* And why not?

Jeril: BECAUSE! Hmmmm… I'm getting losta reviews! I'm happy!! *dances around* BananaGirl! You're the coolest! I worship your _Fanfiction University_ fic!! 


	13. Excuse me officer Can I see some ID?

I sighed with relief as the last period before lunch ended. Nothing had happened! Well, actually, ten minutes before the bell had gone off, Vegeta's stomach had rumbled, rattling everything in the classroom. Then Kakarot's had. My 'uncles' and I had gotten a glare from the teacher and looks of amazement from the other kids.

"Paging Ms. Bouke Enda," came a voice over the loudspeakers, "You are required at the office to take a phone call."

"Come on, guys." I sighed and led them toward the office. I had a bad feeling about this call.

Mike was there waiting for us. "I'll watch them while you take the call." He said and I grinned thankfully at him.

"Thanks, Mike." I entered the office. "I got paged for the phone call." The secretary looked at me then jerked a thumb at the waiting phone. I picked it up. "Yello?"

"Reishi?" asked the boy on the other end.

"Gutei, what are you calling about?" I asked incredulously.

"You won't believe this but…"

"The chibis ate all the food for snack?"

"How'd you know?"

"I just had a bad feeling. I'll pick you up in five." I hung up and walked back out. "Come on. We have to pick up the chibis and then we're eating at Subway."

"Again?" Vegeta growled.

"Come on! The food isn't that bad!" I said as we all got into my car.

"No. It's not but I would like a little variety in my diet. Why didn't you drive this car to school yesterday?" Vegeta answered.

"I don't want carless people to started asking me for lifts." I said and stepped on the gas as I drove to the younger kids' school. I got there in record time and the chibis were outside waiting. They all got in without comment and I took off for Subway.

When we got there, I ordered two party subs, four potato chip bags and five cokes for each of the Saiyans. Zar, Mike and I both got foot long meals. I paid with my credit card and I didn't even look at the total. _Thank Kami I have over three thousand dollars on my card._ I said to myself and pocketed the receipt. _Though by the end of the week it'll prolly be all gone._

We all sat down under much scrutiny and most of the people had to blink a few times as they saw the four Saiyans dig into the party subs. Mike, Vegeta, Kakarot and I sat at one table while Goten, Trunks and Zar sat at another. "So Mike… how's school?" I asked around mouthfuls.

"Well, normal. Except Ms. Piers seems to be in LaLa Land, all of a sudden." Mike chuckled. "I guess that has something to do with those two?"

"Yeah. She saw Vegeta and _bam_! Love at first sight!" I chuckled too and sipped at my soda.

"That is until she saw Kakarot, right?"

"Yeah. Same deal with Mr. Eveans."

"What? What did he do?" we were now talking over the Saiyans' heads and they knew it.

"He used Kakarot as a dummy. Pointed out all the chest and back muscles on him. I swear he has some pretty good self-control! He kept himself from touching Kakarot the entire time!"

"Really?" Mike lifted an eyebrow and licked his fingers clean. "Scary…"

"Yeah." I finished my food and found the two adult Saiyans looking at us.

"Any other _surprises_ you should tell us about?" Vegeta asked me in a low, dangerous voice.

"No…" I thought for a moment. "Mike? What are your next two periods?"

"P.E. Both." Mike answered and then looked at Vegeta and Kakarot in shock.

"Yeah. Listen up you two," I crooked a finger at the two Saiyans. "If you dare do anything unhuman during gym, I swear I will kill you." Vegeta quirked an eyebrow at me in a show of disbelief. "And I will, no matter how weak I am."

"Bouke?" Zar asked. "Our lunch hour's about up."

"Really?" I looked at the clock and felt my heart jump. Ten minutes till. Ten minutes to get to the chibis' school and then to mine. "To the car!" I yelled and we all ran and jumped in it. I took off speeding. I made it to the little kids' school in more of a record time then I had before. The boys took off running to their classroom while I sped off.

About halfway back to school, I saw a police car flashing its lights at me. "Shit, shit, shit, shit…" I began chanting my new mantra to myself as I pulled over. _Heh. I wonder if this guy's the real bit._ "'cuse me, sir. Are you a real police officer?" I asked him.

"Of course I am!" he said indignantly. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Sorry, officer. I just had a run-in with a security guard who wasn't really one so I'm a little suspicious."

"Ah! You've met Marvin." The cop showed me his badge and I nodded in appreciation.

"What's the matter, officer?" I asked as he looked in the window at me and the other guys. Vegeta glared at him and Kakarot just smiled. _It'd be just my luck if he thought Kakarot was on some kind of drugs._ I thought to myself with a mental sigh.

"You do know you were speeding twenty miles over the speed limit?" the cop asked me.

"Yes, officer." I said with a sigh. "I'm late for school so I was trying to get back in time."

"Really? What's the story?"

"My little cousins ate all the food I packed for them for their lunch and since they have large appetites, they were still hungry. I picked them up, took all of us to Subway, dropped them off again and here I am, trying to get back to the high school before it starts which is in… three minutes." I answered, looking at the clock.

"Can I see your driver's license?" I gave it to him. He did all the stuff and then gave me a ticket. I waved good-bye to him and as he walked back to his car, flipped off his backside.

"Stupid bastard…" I mumbled and pulled back onto the road. I drove off, at a reasonable speed, to the high school. We were ten minutes late, due to the shitty traffic and that asshole of a cop.

We ran into class and the gym coach gave us his special 'I'll-hunt-you-down-like-the-dogs-you-are' glare. "Where were you?" he barked.

"At lunch with my cousins and uncles and there was bad traffic, sir." I explained lamely. He didn't need to know about the cop. Coach Bergman's a funny guy: funny as in strange. We don't know if he was in the army or not but he runs gym like a drill sergeant and he requires us to call him 'sir'.

"Drop down and give me twenty!" he roared. I nodded and Mike and I complied without a groan. Coach looked at Kakarot and Vegeta. "You're her uncles?" Vegeta nodded. "Why aren't you doing it too?" he yelled.

"What? Oh… okay." Kakarot and Vegeta did the push-ups in just a few seconds.

"You didn't do them all!" Coach's voice seemed to be at a perpetual shouting level.

"Yes, we did!" Kakarot said with a grin.

"It only took you a few seconds if you did actually do them!" Coach howled.

"Well, of course. We're fast." Vegeta said calmly.

"I don't believe you!" Coach yelled and, with more then a bit of strain, picked up a weight weighing one hundred pounds. "Lift this ten times!" he gave it to Kakarot.

"Okay." Kakarot, slower this time so that Coach could see him, did as Coach said.

"What… but…"

"I told you we were fast but did I mention we were strong." Vegeta said with a smirk. The class was now all sitting down except Mike and myself who were standing, laughing quietly to ourselves.

"Oh, so you're a cheeky bastard, huh? Gimme a hundred sit-ups and then a hundred push-ups! All four of you!" Coach didn't seem to like Vegeta's attitude.

"I don't see how any of you can get stronger in this pathetic gravity." Vegeta growled at me quietly as we all did the sit-ups and push-ups.

"It's not like we have a gravity room or a control on the planet's." I answered, groaning heavily due to the fact that after seventy-five sit-ups my stomach muscles were killing me.

"Do you have a problem with the assignment?" Coach asked me.

"No, sir." I grumbled and flipped over to do my push-ups.

"Good!" he stomped over to where Mike was struggling with his push-ups. Mike was on his fifth while I was just finishing up and then I sat up to watch him. "Do you have a problem with the assignment I've given you?"

"No, sir. It's just that I have weak arm muscles!" Wrong thing to say to the coach.

"Then you can have another fifty to strengthen them up!" Coach shouted. He then turned to the class and got them organized into playing a game of basketball. When Mike was finished, we went and joined them.

Coach watched everyone for a few minutes and then approached Kakarot and Vegeta. They were sitting up against the wall, reminiscing over old times. He stood by them for a few minutes, being completely ignored before Vegeta grew a little angry. "Why the hell are you hanging around over here?" Vegeta bellowed in a voice to rival Coach's.

"I was wondering what your secrets are." Coach said in a talking voice, the first time I had ever heard him use a voice like it. Oh wait! You don't know! Well. I, being the eavesdropping kind of personality that I am, was hiding under the bleachers listening and Mike was with me. We were at an angle where we could see them but they couldn't see us. If they could, I'd be dead, literally

"Our secrets?" Kakarot and Vegeta both echoed. I sniggered silently. So Vegeta wasn't all that bright too.

"Yeah. The key to your strength and big muscles and speed." Coach said.

"Oh. The key." Kakarot looked at Vegeta.

"Well… since you seem to be a nice guy," Vegeta waved for Kakarot's silence, "I will deign to tell you." _Awh fuck! Come on Vegeta! Be nice!_ "Each morning I wake up at five, I do five hundred push-ups, two hundred sit-ups and three hundred chin-ups. Then I eat a large breakfast. I then train till lunch and that's when I eat another large meal. I train again till dinner and I eat again. I then go to sleep at ten or there abouts." Vegeta explained his day.

"What do you mean 'train'?" Coach asked.

"I spar with Kakarot here, his spawn or my brat. Or if no one is available to spar with, then I do sit-ups, chin-ups, push-ups and other things." Vegeta said with his smirk. My coach stared at Vegeta for a moment and then walked off muttering to himself.

"Hah! That was a good one Vegeta! Telling him what you really do!" Kakarot snickered. I was amazed. I had thought that there wasn't a malicious bone in his body. "You can come out now, guys." I looked at Mike and he shrugged. We came out.

"You forgot we can sense ki." Vegeta smirked.

"Yeah, well, I can't keep track of all the little details." I said with a shrug. "Anyway, he'll be bugging me about what you really do for the rest of the school year now." I sighed. A lot would be happening because of this. "We better get back to the game Mike." I waved to my 'uncles' and jogged back into the fray with Mike.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: Ack! I'm updating again! This is one of my fastest updated fics! You lucky bunch of monkeys! *Jeril looks mortified* Oops! Soory if I offended any of your Saiyan personalities! *bows* Forgive me! There's not a lot I can say about this chap so… Oh yeah! Vegeta, I think you can kill the coach…

Vegeta: Really?!? *smirks*

Jeril: Yeah. He's named close to my teacher and I hate my teacher so… If I can think of a good reason in the fic, you can.

Kakarot: *looks astonished* You shouldn't encourage Vegeta to kill innocents!

Jeril: You're too much of a goody-goody, Kakarot! Besides, he's not innocent! He's mean to Bouke and his reality counterpart is mean to me! *Vegeta nods solemnly* So there! *lol*


	14. Jon and Joe, Perv and Car

I picked up my bag and headed out of the showers, kicking Jon who was trying to get a look. "Maybe you and Master Roshi should get together some time and trade magazines, eh?" I said to him as he picked himself up.

"Master Roshi? You mean _the_ Master Roshi? You think I'd be good enough to be in his exalted presence?" Jon babbled at me. _Damn it! I forgot he was a DBZ enthusiast._

"Um, yeah. Sure. Whatever." I kicked him again and met Vegeta and Kakarot out in the hallway. Mike arrived a few minutes later.

"Bouke. Let me drive the car. You look exhausted." Mike said to me as we followed the hallway clearing Saiyans to my car.

"You just don't want to sit in the back. Also, what makes you think I'd let you drive Joe?" I asked. Vegeta stopped and looked at me with an odd look.

"Joe?" Kakarot said with a clearly confused look.

"Yeah, didn't you name your car?" I said and patted the hood of my hunter green car.

"Uh, Bouke? That's not really… erm… normal, shall I say?" Mike said, hiding a smile behind one hand. Vegeta though, didn't have any scruples about bursting out laughing right there in the school's parking lot. As I glared at him, Kakarot joined in with the merriment. Then it was Mike's turn. I stood there, clutching my fists and swearing a blue streak at the bunch of lunatics.  People were staring at us and pointing.

Then, I grabbed Mike by the throat, picked him up, opened the car door and threw him in, gently though. I glared at Kakarot and Vegeta. "Which one of you is next?" I hissed dangerously.

"Him!" Kakarot pointed at Vegeta and I looked at the Saiyan no Ouji.

He smirked at me. "Just try to throw me in there, ikeike." He said in that sexy voice of his.

"I won't try anything Vegeta. You will show your submission to me by getting in there of your own accord." I said with a smirk to rival his own. Vegeta got a look on his face that was very peculiar. It quickly turned to anger though. He stomped off; making hairline cracks in the pavement of the parking lot.

Mike climbed out of the car. "I'll look after him. But you owe me for that choking thing." I nodded and he ran off after Vegeta.

"I hope Vegeta doesn't hurt him," Kakarot muttered, echoing my own thoughts.

"Yeah. Come on, we're going to pick up the chibis." I climbed into the car and Kakarot got into the passenger's seat.

We picked up the boys and headed home. The entire time, Zar told them about how great the mall was, the awesome shops there, the completely spiffy food court (his words, not mine) and the kick ass fountain where, if you were quick and little, you could get a lot of free change. At this remark, I fixed him with my deadly evil eye look. It didn't seem to work very well as I was looking in the back view mirror and all he had to do was slink down to avoid my gaze.

When we arrived at the house, Vegeta and Mike were standing on the porch and to my great surprise; they were actually having an intelligent conversation. Well, it's not that I doubted Vegeta or Mike's ability to hold an intelligent conversation; it's just that I thought Vegeta's initial hostility toward Mike and Mike's scholarly ways would create a big gap between them.

As it turned out, the topic was about Dragonball Z so Vegeta would be one of the few experts on the subject and Mike was interested in it. _Scary,_ I thought to myself as I opened the door with my key, _they actually have something in common._ Mike was trying to find out what Saga the guys were from. They were obviously after Cell and we were thinking that it was sometime after the Majin Buu Saga but before Dragonball GT.

"So guys… What do you want for dinner?" I asked as I flopped onto the couch with a large sigh.

"How about McDonalds!" Zar yelled and began bouncing around.

I groaned, "Zar, you know how many big Macs it'd take to feed these walking stomachs?"

"Uh… a lot?"

"Yeah, and you know how much big Macs cost?"

"A lot?"

"When you add it all up."

"Okay… But isn't kaasan and tousan paying for all this?"

"When they see the bills, they won't." I assured him and thought about all the money I was losing. "And I had been saving up for a new car too…"

"It's okay, Bouke. You've got a novel you've almost completed, right? It'll be a best seller, I know it." Mike tried to cheer me up. I gave him an icy glare and stomped into the kitchen. I ripped open the refrigerator and groaned.

"KAMI DAMN YOU SAIYANS!" I howled and with the side of my fist I punched the wall. I slammed the fridge door closed and looked at the wall where I had hit it. There was a hole one-inch deep. "Fucking shit… kaasan's gonna be pissed about that." I muttered to myself and stomped back into the living room. Kakarot and Vegeta were looking at each other with raised eyebrows. Goten and Trunks stared at me with wide eyes and then tears started to form in them.

"You hate us!" Goten sniffed pathetically and then burst into tears. I stood and watched the two demi-Saiyans create a puddle on the living room carpet.

"Don't cry guys." I said and tried to smile. I just scowled at them and that made them cry more. "No, seriously. I can't stand kids when they cry." Zar saw the reaction the chibis were evoking in me and so he followed suit. I rubbed my face and glared at the ceiling in frustration. _Why me? Kami, why me? DAMN YOU!_ I mentally shouted and then got down on my knees. I looked at all three of the chibis and suddenly I felt like crying myself.

Instead, I kept a stiff upper lip and said, "If you stop crying, I'll take you to the mall right now and buy you each a toy."

Zar stopped crying and Goten sniffled to a stop and wiped his eyes and _nose_ on Trunks' sleeve while Trunks wiped his eyes and his nose on Goten's. "You… y-you really mean it?" Goten said and sniffled again while giving me the infamous Son Puppy Eyes™.

I bit my lip and then mumbled, "Yeah."

"Will you also take us to the food court?" Zar rubbed his eye with an expression I hadn't seen for about three years.

"Sure, gutei." I slightly smiled.

"Promise?" Trunks asked in the corniest, cutest, most heart-wrenching voice I had ever heard.

"I promise." I said solemnly.

"YEAH!" all the chibis started dancing around and jumping up and down in utter happiness.

"Wait a damned second!" I shouted and Zar froze while the other two boys kept bouncing around, "YOU WERE TRICKING ME!"

"What did you expect, Bouke? Actual crying from us?" Zar said with a smirk and joined the chibis in their chant. "We get a toy and candy! We get a toy and candy!" I watched the brats party around the living room, and realized exactly how gullible I was.

"Bouke…" Mike said with a smirk that was almost identical to Zar's, "I don't want to say this but…"

"You're a baka." Kakarot said with another smirk.

"A complete and utter baka." Vegeta smirked also. I looked around at all the smirking faces and felt alone. _The world's gone mad…_ my mind whispered to itself and I sat down on the couch, staring at nothing.

"Bouke?" Mike looked at me oddly.

_The world's plotting against me…_

"Reishi?" Zar asked and crawled up beside me.

_Everyone hates me…_

"Ikeike, snap out of it! I'm hungry!" the Saiyan no Ouji shouted.

_I'm only here to serve others and get nothing in return…_

"Shut up Vegeta!" Kakarot yelled back.

_Nobody wants me around…_ SMACK! I looked up dazedly to see Vegeta standing over me, rubbing his hand and muttering. He noticed me looking at him and he walked over and I think, though the smack might have messed with my vision, he was blushing.

"Bouke! Take us to the mall now!" Zar called out as he dashed out of the house, forgetting about my depressive spell. The chibis ran out after him.

I glanced at Mike, "You watch Kakarot and Vegeta for me?"

"If you bring home the bacon," he said with a sly smile.

"Good enough for me." I sighed and tromped out after the brats. It was going to be a long, long time before I came back to the house. I could feel it in my bones and knew it from experience.

"GOTEN? TRUNKS? ZAAAAAAR?" I yelled out their names as I dashed around the mall. I kept on getting glimpses of them but Zar was leading the little bastards well. "GET BACK HERE NOW!" I saw them running past the fountains, grabbing change as they shot past. I barreled after them and ran straight into a brick wall.

Rubbing my aching neck, I looked up and into the face of Mad Mall Marvin. "H-hey!" I said, trying to sound cheerful.

"You're taking crack, aren't you? Or is it speed?" Marvin looked very crazy at the moment. His hair was sticking up every which way and it reminded me of Kakarot vaguely.

"I'm not on any drugs, mister! I'm just trying to catch my cousins and my brother!" I pushed past him and dashed off, following the mad giggling.

I finally caught them in the food court, where the cinnamon rolls at Cinnabun were entrancing them. "How many?" I panted and pulled out my credit card.

"Two for me!" Zar said with a string of drool running down his chin.

"Twenty for me!" Goten was drooling also.

"And another twenty!" Trunks, thankfully, wasn't drooling.

"You heard 'em." I said to the fellow behind the counter. He shook his head in amazement and began to put the trays by the cash register.

"That'll be a total of forty-one seventy-nine." The man said and I handed him the credit card as the chibis carried the trays over to a table. I got back my card and trotted over to where they were inhaling the food.

"That hungry?" I asked them and they all nodded vigorously. "Okay, we'll get dinner next. Pizza. Domino's Pizza!" Zar cheered, spraying me with cinnamon rolls chunks and I grabbed him and gave him a noogie. "Take this brat!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: Well… Jon's messed up, that's for sure. And Kakarot! I never knew you were that evil!

Vegeta: I've been giving him pointers on his evilness.

Kakarot: Yeah right Vegeta! I learned it all from your son! *Vegeta growls*

Jeril: Stop bickering you two. Disclaimer: I don't own McDonalds, Cinnabun or Domino's Pizza. I love all their food. Gaaaaah! I'm hungry now!! *sniffles and eats a cyber French fry* I don't own ANY of the restaurants mentioned in this fic unless I say so! THERE LAWYERS!! ARE YOU HAPPY NOW?


	15. Authors Anonymous!

Zar ran ahead of Goten, Trunks and I and opened the door. I staggered in after the chibis, hefting my ten large pizzas hopelessly. Just before I dropped them though, Kakarot took them from me and with ease set them on the table. Goten set down his fifteen larges and Trunks did too. Then they dashed out to get the Coca-cola we had left in the car. Vegeta and Mike were already sitting down at the set table and they tore into their pizza, closely followed by Kakarot and Zar. Goten and Trunks arrived with the five 2 liter bottles of coke and the last ten pizzas. I made sure each of the Saiyans had their own bottle of coke before I sat down.

I picked up two pieces to make sure they would not get devoured on accident. I set them on my plate and poured myself a glass of soda. I ate slowly, thoughtfully watching the Saiyans move at a speed that I would never be able to achieve.

I glanced at the clock. It was only six. Then, in the back of my mind, an alarm sounded. Six fifteen… Wednesdays… something happened in fifteen minutes… "Zar? What's happening in fifteen?" My gutei looked at the clock and shrugged. Then Mike looked at it.

"SHIT!" he jumped up and yelled at me, "The 'Authors Anonymous' meeting!"

"You're right!" I jumped up. The AA meetings were held every Wednesday and Saturday, "Okay, guys! Stuff your faces because we're hauling ass in five minutes!" I ran to my room to get my stuff. Mike followed me closely.

"Are you sure it's safe to bring Goku, Vegeta and all them to the meeting?" he asked as he stuffed his papers into his book bag.

"We can't leave them here and Vegeta will kill me if I hire a baby-sitter for him." I said with a grimace as I shouldered my bag.

"Yeah, but this is the _anime_ meeting! We're gonna get creamed!" Mike complained as we returned to the living room.

"Yeah, but what else can I do? Leave them here with Zar? He'll make Goku and Vegeta hold up a bank or something!" I stopped talking then because I had arrived in the dining room. "Okay fellows! Clean up!" they all zipped about doing their tasks and finishing eating what little was left of the food. Then, we all piled into the car and I sped off to the meeting where my life would end.

"Omega!" I waved to the girl who had called out my penname and was walking over to me. Her brown hair reached her shoulders and her eyes were also brown. She was one of the few people in my Alaskan town with tanned skin. She was a half a foot shorter then I, standing at four foot nine. Everyone always teased her about her height but we had learned to be careful as there was apt to be a character similar to us in her next fic that would die a horrible death. She was my long time fanfic friend, Banana Girl.

She did have a real name, but I didn't know it and she didn't know mine even though we also knew each other in high school. It was the rules of the Authors Anonymous Club that authors only called each other by their pennames. It was an odd rule, but it was cool because it gave me a sense of having another personality or persona.

"Hey! Bana!" I grinned as we walked over to our accustomed table, "How are you doing?"

"Great! I got the next few chaps of my fic out!" she passed me the chaps and I grinned.

"Awesome! I've been waiting since Saturday for these babies!"

"Who are the studs with you?" Bana whispered as the Saiyans, Mike and Zar joined us.

"The boy sitting by me is my brother and the other guy is Darek. The last two, hot, buff, drop dead sexy stud muffins… well… you'll never believe this but…" I didn't have the time to tell her the rest, as that was when the chairman hollered for order.

"The fifty-eighth meeting of the fourth year Authors Anonymous will come to order!" the chairman bellowed.

"Awh, shut up!" a rude author called Jackal shouted as he jumped to his feet. He was glared at until he sat down again. He did that every meeting.

"Thank you for the customary introduction Jackal. Now if _you'll_ please shut up," that brought chuckles from the gathered authors, "we can continue." Mac, the chairman, cleared his throat and picked up a list in front of him, "The bi-monthly awards will now be handed out. Once more, I will read the award, the title of the fic and then the _author's_ summary.

"For the Most OOC Fic: Jackal's 'Good-bye Pan, Hello Krillin'. Trunks comes out about his love for Krillin after dating Pan for three years." Jackal was greeted by a load of hisses from the Trunks girls as he went to claim his award. He always won the Most OOC Fic award. He flipped off the crowd with a smirk as he sat back down.

"For the Oddest Crossover Fic: Omega's 'General Insanity'. What happens when Dende goes mad and brings in Barney, the Teletubbies, Sailor Moon and others into the DBZ world." I stood up and got a mixed reaction. I took my award, shrugged to the crowd and walked back to my seat.

"For the Best General Fic: Jeril's 'Another Boring Day… NOT!'. Merry is just an average eighteen year-old in whose room Vegeta just happens to land in. You all can guess what insanity occurs then!" Jeril stood up and bowed deeply to the many cheers that greeted her. She claimed her prize and sat down again. I straightened. _Why does that scenario sound familiar? I will talk to her after the meeting…_

"For the Funniest Fic: Banana Girl's 'The Official Fanfiction University of Dragonball Z'. What happens when an average DBZ author has to go to a University where Goku teaches you the art of ignorance and Goku fans and Vegeta fans are forever trying to outsmart each other?" Banana Girl stood up to more cheering then I got as I was bursting my lungs from hollering. She made the 'Victory' sign as she took her award and with a grin, sat down again.

"For the Best Action Fic: Darek's…" I zoned out. There was another thing tugging at my mind the next award was… THE BEST YAOI AWARD! I felt the blood drain from my face. It always went to something that was Vegeta/Kakarot! I grabbed Goten and Trunks by the collars and, cursing, hauled them out of the Meeting Room of the high school. Curiously, Vegeta, Kakarot and Zar followed me. That's what I had been counting on.

"What did you do that for?" Goten squealed, rubbing his neck.

I thought fast, "What were you two plotting?" I prayed to Kami that they had been plotting something.

"We weren't plotting nothing!" Trunks complained.

"But Trunk, you said…" Trunks slammed his hand down over Goten's mouth and grinned weakly at me.

"Nothing…" he echoed.

"Sure! Don't do anything crazy or I swear I'll rip off your arms and shove them up your… never mind." I ushered them back into the room.

Mac was still going. "For the Best Yuri Fic: Geni's 'Away with the Men'. This is where Vegeta and Goku both kill each other in a sparring match and so Chi-chi and Bulma go to each other for comfort. But the need for comfort evolves into something more." Geni got up to get her prize but found Kakarot and Vegeta glaring at her with hate filled eyes.

"Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit…" I started chanting my mantra for the second time that week.

"Oh my Kami!" screamed Geni, "Vegeta and Goku look-alikes!"

"And Goten and Trunks look-alikes!" came a cry from the Chibi table. All the girls stood up and, as one, raced toward the Saiyans.

"Kakarot!" I hissed, "Get us out of here! _Now_!" the hoard of girls ran for us. As Goten, Trunks, Mike, Zar, Vegeta and I grabbed a hold of Kakarot, I made a phone sign to Bana and she nodded in agreement. Then, we disappeared from the meeting and reappeared in the parking lot. "Into the car!" we all dove into it and I stepped on the gas, sending the car racing out of the parking lot.

"Ikeike!" Vegeta roared, "What the hell was that fic about?"

"Erm… well… some people think that some pairings are good and well…" I was at a loss, "Eh… Mike will explain it for you!"

"What?" Mike gulped as Vegeta twisted around at his seat to glare at him. Kakarot already was, "Well… like she said. Some people are fond of pairings that never happened…"

"Why did she really drag the brats out of the room?" Kakarot asked him.

"They were announcing the Best Yaoi Fic," Mike looked like he was about to cry.

"Who was it about?" Vegeta sounding like he was going to rip Mike limb from limb.

"Well… uh… I can't remember?"

"That's bullshit, brat!" Kakarot yelled.

"IT WAS A VEGETA/GOKU!" Mike howled and then pulled up his jacket to hide his face. Kakarot and Vegeta started gagging.

"It was bad enough having a mental picture of our mates but now…" Vegeta's face was turning green.

"Never! I'M NOT LIKE THAT!" wailed Kakarot.

"Yo! Not in my car, you won't!" I parked the car in the driveway and hurried the Saiyans out.

"Reishi?" Zar asked.

"What gutei?" I answered, watching Kakarot and Vegeta kneel on my lawn, puking up their dinner.

"What's 'yaoi' and 'yuri'?"

"Ummm… well… ask Mike…"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*rolf* I couldn't help but put that yaoi thing in! I needed to write about their reactions to people thinking that they liked each other! I am not making fun of it or people who write those! Poor Mike gets stuck with everything! *lol* Um, sure Emeralz. You can have Mike. If no one else wants him, that is. I couldn't help but stick in my two fics and BananaGirl's fic.

To Welsh-dragon: 'flipped off his backside' would mean that Bouke gave the teacher the finger while his back was turned.


	16. Dirty Magazines and Dirty Fanfics

"Well… yaoi is when a guy and a guy, you know. Yuri is girl-girl." Mike explained weakly. I listened to the chibis screams of incredulity at that remark. Mike had had to explain the whole rest of birds and the bees to the innocent Goten and Trunks. Zar had already known about it except the yuri and yaoi aspect. I chuckled to myself as I whipped up a small snack of macaroni and cheese. _Stupid brats don't know shit…_ I sat down at the table and ate my snack while writing my next fanfic. The now poisoned boys tromped through the kitchen and into Zar's room to play video games and try to forget.

"Hello Vegeta." I said as I finished the second page.

He walked out of the kitchen and sat down beside me. "How'd you know I was coming through the kitchen, ikeike? I didn't make a sound!"

I paused to think. He was right. "Air currents." I said and went back to writing with a smirk. _Let the asshole figure that one out._

"Bullshit," Vegeta muttered and stood up again. He began to pace around the room until Kakarot walked in. They locked gazes. Neither blinked or looked away for two minutes.

Finally, I said, "What's eating your ass?" Both blinked, turned and looked at me with a confused look. I rolled my eyes and explained, "Bakas! You're both acting weird? What's eating you?" I continued to write as I talked.

"I'm not like that…" Kakarot muttered and sat down to sulk. I passed him the pot of macaroni and cheese. Food would cheer him up.

Then I did a double take. "What? What do you mean 'not like that'?"

He looked startled, "What do you mean 'what do you mean 'not like that''?"

"Okay…" I took a deep breath, "What kind of 'not like that' are you talking about?"

"The kind that's well… you know!" Kakarot looked uncomfortable.

"Tell me!" I bellowed, wondering how stupid, innocent Kakarot could know about such things.

"Okay! When I was little, about Goten's age, I found Master Roshi's collection of magazines… and they were pretty bad. Some were yaoi and he even had a few yuri." Kakarot grimaced at the memory.

"Oh…" I shuddered, "I feel so sorry for you. Must have been pretty traumatizing to find those at such a young age."

"Yeah, and I began to understand why Master Roshi acted the way he did around women."

"That baka disgusts me." Vegeta spat.

"Amen to that." I said solemnly. "Sick pervs like him shouldn't be allowed within a mile of young children."

"Yeah." Kakarot had finished the pot of macaroni and cheese and was now looking at me with the Son Puppy Eyes™. I sighed and passed him the rest of mine. I looked back at my fanfic. Or where it had been. With alarm, I looked around for it. Vegeta was standing in the kitchen, reading it. _Awh, shit…_ my mind quailed, _you shouldn't have been writing a Vegeta lemon when he's in your house and you knew it!_

"Ikeike! What is this shit?" Vegeta yelled, waving the papers around.

"What is what?" I said, hoping I sounded young, naïve and stupid.

"This piece of shit!"

"Well…"

"I can't read it!"

_Thank you, Kami for having my baka of a teacher train us to write in cursive!_ "It's just an assignment for my class!"

"Oh… I see. But I swear this is my name right here… and Bulma's, that cueball's, Kakarot's and his wife!" _Stupid, stupid, stupid bakayaro! Writing a fiver with names they could recognize!_

I thought fast, "We did a free assignment on a subject we were interested in. I did mine on anime!"

"Oh," he searched my face for any signs of a lie.

"May I please have it back?" I said in the calmest voice I could summon up.

"Whatever." Vegeta dropped it on the floor and walked off.

"Thank you Kami…" I whispered as I picked it up, making sure that all the pages were there.

"It's not an assignment, is it?" Kakarot asked me as I sat down. He was looking at me with an unsettling gaze.

"Er… not really." I shuffled the pages around nervously.

"What is it?"

"Eh, a fanfic."

"Really?" Kakarot scooted his chair closer, "Who's it about?"

"Well, like Vegeta said, him, Bulma, Krillin, you and Chi-chi." I shuddered at the mention of the frying pan wielding demon harpy from hell.

"What's the story?"

"Oh, you mean the plot." I coughed, "Well, Krillin hosts a birthday party…"

"Whose birthday is it?" Kakarot interrupted me.

"I don't know! Does a birthday party have to be celebrating someone's birthday?"

"Yes!"

"Shut up Kakarot! Now, where was I? Oh yes…"

"You had just said Krillin was hosting a birthday party and then I asked…"

"SHUT UP KAKAROT!" I screamed, "It was a rhetorical question for Kami's sake! Gods! How did you make it so far in life without dying?"

"Well, I am very strong and…"

"YOU BAKAYARO! THAT WAS ANOTHER RHETORICAL QUESTION!" I felt like going and hitting my head against the wall until it burst like a rotten melon. Kakarot smiled sheepishly at me and put his hand behind his head. "Now, please let me tell you the plot line. Krillin hosts a party, Vegeta, you and your mates get completely and utterly wasted." Kakarot raised his hand, "What?"

"What does 'wasted' mean?"

"It means you got so fucking drunk you couldn't see, walk or talk straight." Kakarot's mouth made a little "o" and I continued with my story, "So, Radditz appears from the dead. Krillin kills him and everyone goes home happy." _Okay, so it's the _completely _edited version. I don't want to pollute his poor mind anymore then it is._

"That doesn't sound like a very good story." Kakarot stood up and stretched. "I'm going to spar with Vegeta."

"No ki!" I shouted after him as he walked toward the back of the house, looking for Vegeta. I sighed and closed my eyes. Silence, complete silence. I could have heard a pin drop but then the doorbell rang. "Damn mother-fucking door-to-door salesman…" I muttered as I went to answer it. What I saw was so surprising that I couldn't speak for a few moments as my mind groped to assimilate the data that had been thrown at it.

Leon was standing there, but it wasn't the Leon I knew. This Leon was clutching a dozen roses to his chest like a lifesaver and he had a look of seriousness on his face. The Leon I knew would never arrive at my house with any look other then a grin. Carrying roses no less! "Who are you and what have you done with my Leon?" I demanded of the stranger when I finally found my voice.

"Heh, nice one Bo." Leon said in a strangled tone.

"Who's gone and died?"

"Nobody."

"Then why the hell did you bring the roses?" I was getting very suspicious. Leon wasn't this serious, by now he would've launched into a story about aliens from my first question and for the second would've confessed he was the one who killed my cat even though I didn't own one.

"Well… I've come on a mission of the gravest circumstances. I…"

"IT'S YOU!" a voice yelled in a deafening tone. I turned around to see Vegeta standing in the corridor behind me. "KISAMA, YOU'D BETTER HAVE A GOOD ANSWER FOR THAT STUNT YOU PULLED OR ELSE YOUR GUTS WILL BE SPLATTERED ALL OVER THESE WALLS!" Vegeta started advancing with earth-quaking footsteps. Kakarot was right behind him and I motioned him to grab Vegeta and restrain him. Kakarot tried but Vegeta elbowed the other Saiyan in the gut and while Kakarot was bent double, he sent a punch to Kakarot's head to knock him out. I caught myself in the act of actually feeling sorry for Kakarot.

Leon just stood where he was, quaking in his boots. I was the only one to save him. _Damn it! I'm not cut out for heroics!_ With that thought, I got into an attacking stance and watched Vegeta advance on my boy friend and I.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: They are soooooo sick in this fic!! And what's up with Leon coming with roses? Avamar, I neglected to answer your question. No I don't dislike Kakarot, he just gets on my nerves. Tanx for all the reviews!!!!! *sniffles* You all are so nice!

Vegeta: You seem to be getting a little redundant, ikeike.

Jeril: DON'T CALL ME THAT!!!

Kakarot: Ikeike, ikeike, ikeike, ikeike, ikeike!!!

Jeril: You two are so cruel! *runs away crying*

Kakarot: What do we do now Vegeta? *stares at the grinning reviewers in fear*

Vegeta: Shut up, baka! I'm thinking! *they watch in horror as the reviewers advance on them now that they are unprotected*


	17. Span… dex… ahhhhhhh…

I threw a weak punch at Vegeta but as his attention was fixed on Leon, it connected with his stomach. He glared at me and I grinned weakly back. "Just what kind of punch was that, ikeike?" he snarled.

"A shitty one." I answered and wished to Kami that help would come. As it turned out, Kami was listening for once. Goten and Trunks barreled into Vegeta from behind and knocked him to the ground. Trunks, with a look of regret, knocked his father on the back of the head, sending the adult Saiyan into the realms of oblivion. Goten looked at his father and, with a sigh, picked him up and brought him back to the couch. Trunks also picked up his father and carried him into my parents' bedroom.

I turned back to Leon. His mouth was hanging open and it took a few snaps of my fingers to bring him back. "Did those kids… their fathers… how…" he talked incoherently.

"Shut up about them Leon and tell me what 'grave circumstance' brought you here?" I said, standing in what my brother had called my "don't-give-me-any-shit" stance and my deadly glare.

"Well, I came… because…"

"Don't tell me you're a chicken."

"I came to give you these roses and tell you…" Leon handed me the roses while he grasped for the right phrase.

Then it hit me like a ton of dog shit, "You're dumping me, aren't you?"

"I'm sorry, Bo. I truly am." He looked like _he_ was about to cry. _I'm the one whose supposed to be doing the crying, right?_ My numb mind asked itself.

"But… w-why?" Then it hit me like another ton of dog shit. I wouldn't have been surprised if my brain got a bruise from the influx of information. The footsy, the roses, the crying… It all connected. "Leon," my voice took on an accusatory tone, "you're gay, aren't you?"

"Yes, Bo. I just finally realized it. I'm sorry."

I waited for my heart to break and the rush of tears. It didn't come, "It's okay, Leon. I guess I've understood subconsciously that it wasn't going to work for a long time. You were a good guy and all but I guess I already had known that you were gay. We always have joked that you were the Gay Straight Guy, haven't we?"

"Yeah." Leon grinned and gave me a hug. I just barely had time to put the roses on a side table before he enveloped me in his big arms. I hugged him back platonically. When we broke he smiled at me. "No hard feelings then. Friends?"

"Since when weren't we?" I half-smiled at him. "Want to come in for a drink?"

"Sure," he followed me in and I poured him a cup of coke. I set it in front of him and then set to putting the roses in a vase. He paused all of a sudden. "Your hot uncle… is he coming out soon?"

I mentally shook myself. _Bouke, get used to him calling guys "hot"._ "I don't think so. Trunks knocked him a good one."

"I see." I sat down beside him and we sat, not talking, just thinking. Mike walked in. He saw Leon and I and started to leave. "Hey, Mike! Come out on out of that shell and join in the social life."

"I like my shell, just to let you know." Mike said but still sat down at the table with us. We discussed teachers, classes and cafeteria food. Then talk turned to non-school stuff such as songs, singers, singing group, cars and other things that perforated our teenage lives.

"So…" Mike searched for a new topic when the conversation lagged, "you two getting married or something?" I looked at Leon and as one we burst out laughing. "What?" Mike demanded. "What did I say that was so damn funny?"

"Well, actually we just broke up." Leon said.

"And you're laughing about that?" Mike gave me a weird look.

"Yeah." I shrugged.

"Why did you break up?"

"Because I've found that I don't like women anymore." Leon said plainly.

Mike's eyes got big and he edged a little farther away from Leon. "When did you find this out?"

"Oh, don't worry Mike. You're not my type." Leon said with a wink. Mike still looked scared. "Well, it was yesterday I finally figured it out because I found myself wanting to ask a guy for his phone number."

"Who?" I asked, getting a feeling in the pit of my stomach.

"Your uncle." Leon smirked. "He's got a nice ass."

"I agree completely." I slipped up.

"But he's your uncle!" Leon had a look of utter disgust on his face.

"Not like I'd try anything but I'm entitled to an opinion, right?"

"I guess." Suddenly, we heard a booming voice screaming for blood and beginning to raise hell in the back room. "Shit, I guess that's my call to leave. See ya'll tomorrow at school!" Leon dashed off and just in time too.

"WHERE IS THE BAKAYARO?" Vegeta bellowed as he stomped into the room. I covered my ears in pain and Mike grimaced.

"Damn it, Vegeta!" I yelled and shot to my feet. "Just keep your voice down a few fucking decibels!"

Vegeta blinked at me, "Decibel?"

"Argh! Your stupidity astounds me! Decibel: a unit for expressing the relative intensity of sounds on a scale from zero for the average least perceptible sound to about 130 for the average pain level." I quoted from the Merriam-Webster dictionary term we had had to learn in school a few months back.

Vegeta blinked again and Kakarot said, "Say what?"

"Stupid people shouldn't breed…" I muttered to myself in exasperation.

"Too late. At least you distracted the angry one." Mike whispered.

"Kakarot, Vegeta," I said, taking advantage of their momentary confusion. I was also fed up with Vegeta's attitude,  "Everyone's entitled to be stupid but you're abusing the privilege." I shook a finger at them.

I watched Vegeta for a moment and then saw it click. With a snarl of anger he powered up slightly, shaking the house. "Kuso kurae, ikeike!"

"Language, language, Veggie-chan." I said with a smirk, arching an eyebrow at him.

"You chibi oban!" he grabbed me by the throat and slammed me into the wall. Needless to say, I made quite a dent.

"Of course I'm a onna, chikushoume." I grinned, "And I am not bitchy!"

"Don't. Insult. My. Mother." He tightened the grip on my throat with each word.

"Motherfucking bastard." I rasped. The fist came flying at my face full-throttle. _I guess I deserved this one._ I thought to myself as the world exploded.

"Bo… Bo…" I heard my name being called but it sounded fuzzy, if sounds can sound like that.

"Go 'way," I said and tried to fall back asleep.

"Bo, wake up." Mike's voice said again, this time it was a little clearer.

"Okay, okay." I looked around, "Hey! Who turned off all the lights?"

"Erm, Bo. That's a classic, clichéd term and you just used it. Open your eyes."

I found my eyes were closed so I did open them. My eyes were flooded with light, "Okay, Mike. I'm awake. Now what can I do you for?"

"A jellybean." He was crouched right next to me.

After a moment it sunk in, "Ew, gross! You sick monkey!" I shoved him over.

"Awh, that's not nice Bo."

"Yeah, but that was a sick interpretation. Now tell me before I go back to sleep."

"You promised to call Bana at the meeting, remember?"

"That's all? I can call her tomorrow or, even better, talk to her at school! Now good night!" I curled back up into a ball and shut my eyes. I heard the tapping of phone buttons and assumed Mike was calling her to tell her I wouldn't call her. With a sigh, I slipped back partway into the realms of sleep.

_Ring_… _Ring_… _Ring_… "Hello and good evening!"

_What an odd dream._

"Hello? Excuse me but this better not be a prank caller!"

_It's not a dream?_ "Huh? Oh, yeah. This is Omega, can I talk to Bana, please?"

"Sure, Meg. Hold on for a moment please."

I covered the speaker part. "Mike, you little worthless piece of…" she heard some noise coming from the receiver, "Later." She brought the phone up to her head, "Hey Bana!"

"Hey Meg! What's up?" Bana's cheerful voice said.

"Nothing much, nothing much."

"You still dating the Gay Straight Guy?"

"Nah, turn out he's now the Gay Guy."

"Seriously?"

"Yeppers."

"Ouch. How come you sound so calm about it? If it was me, I'd've already killed him twelve times over in fics."

"I dunno. I guess we're better off as friends."

"Yeah, well, if it hits you hard later on, don't call up me to cry to."

"I wouldn't cry!"

"Sure! Yeah! That's what they _all_ say!"

"Oh yeah, you sitting down?"

"No. Should I be?"

"Yes, sit now." I heard her walk over to a chair and sit, "You know the DBZ look-alikes I brought to the meeting?"

"Uh huh! How could I forget the Vegeta guy?"

"Well, they weren't just look-alikes. They are the guys from the show." I waited for the cries of disbelief but I didn't hear anything. I was about to ask her if she was okay when a peal of laughter came from the phone. I gripped my ear in pain. "Argh! Bana, keep it down!"

"I… can't… help it!" she gasped out.

"Bana, have I ever lied to you?"

"Yeah, all the time." Bana was getting her laughing under control.

"Well, about DBZ?"

"No… except that time you told me that there was a strip tease scene of Vegeta."

"It was April Fool's! And besides, you told me that they had a scene of Trunks and Vegeta poledancing!"

"Okay, okay. We're even. You're not pulling my leg?"

"No way!"

"Okay, I'm sleeping over at your house till they leave. I'll be over in ten. You need any food?"

"Please!" we said our good-byes and hung up.

Bana rushed in and dropped her stuff in my room. She nodded a hello to Mike and then looked at me. "Where is he?"

"Uh, I dunno." I said and walked into the living room where Kakarot was vegged out on the couch. "Where's Vegeta?"

"In the kitchen." Bana and I went to the kitchen where Vegeta was making himself a large sandwich.

Bana froze when she saw him, "Ahhhhhhh…" she stared at him with big eyes that would have had hearts in them if we were an anime.

"Bana? You okay?" I asked.

"Where's his spandex?" she asked in a dreamy voice.

"I dunno." I shrugged.

She almost literally floated over to him, "Hi Veggie-chan!"

"Who are you, onna?" Vegeta spat at her and put a hand on his sandwich defensively.

"I'm Bana. Now go to your room and put on your spandex!" she ordered.

"And if I don't?"

"Then I'll not only be Bana, but your worst night mare also." Bana said with an evil smirk. Vegeta looked slightly scared. He picked up his sandwich and retreated to his room to change. Bana turned to me, "Ha! Not as tough as they portray him, huh?"

"No, Bana. I think you just scared him." I muttered. Vegeta came out a few moments later, wearing his spandex suit.

"Span… dex… ahhhhhhh…" Bana stared at him. Vegeta fidgeted around. _I guess he's having second thoughts about wearing spandex all the time._ I snickered mentally to myself. My eyes wandered over to my kitchen counter. For some odd reason, there was a camera sitting there. I picked it up and checked the film. It was full!

"Bana! Think fast!" I called out and when she looked, I tossed the camera to her. With a grin, she began to snap photos of Vegeta. For a moment, he froze, not knowing what was happening. Then he figured it out and stalked toward Bana with murder written on his face.

"Perfect!" Bana called out and caught a few pics of him angry looking. Then she heaved the camera at me. With a squeal of fright, I caught it and ran. Vegeta was hot on my tail though. When I was rounding a corner, I dropped it in a trashcan. Vegeta followed me till I was back against a wall with nowhere to run to. I gulped in fear.

"Ikeike, where is the device you used to take pictures of me without my permission?" Vegeta growled in my face.

"Erm, I handed it off to someone else." I lied. Vegeta snarled at me wordlessly then stormed off to his room. I breathed a sigh of relief.

Bana ran toward me and began bouncing up and down excitedly. "Kami! We have pics of Vegeta! In _spandex_!"

"You really like spandex, don't you?"

"Only when it's on Veggie-chan!"

I grinned and then sighed, "I'm so tired!"

"Yeah, now that you mention it, I am too."

"Let's turn in then." We headed off to my room where Mike was already camped out.

"Wait a minute!" Bana howled as I was climbing into my bed.

"What?" Mike and I asked in unison.

"We're sleeping with _him_ in here?"

"It's not like he's going to try anything!" I grinned.

"How do you know?" Bana asked me suspiciously.

"Because he's been sleeping over at my house since second grade!"

"What?" Bana looked like she was thinking something along the lines of what I had thought Vegeta was thinking.

"Eh," Mike grinned sheepishly at Bana, "sorry to interrupt but if me sleeping in here poses a problem, I'll move." Mike picked up his sleeping bag and with a wave walked out.

"Night Mike!" we called after him and then Bana laid out her sleeping bag in the vacated spot and we went to sleep.

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Jeril: Whoa! Long chap, huh? Lucky, lucky people! If you've wondered where my 'helpers' for the Author's Note went… well, they got dragged away by rabid fans in the last chap and they're recovering from the shock. Poor Veggie-chan. So, I've gotten Mike to come help me!

Mike: Hi… *hides behind Jer and whispers* Whatever you do, keep Emeralz away!

Jeril: Okay, sure, yeah… What great help… Leon's GAY???? Scaaaary… 0.0 Actually, I do date the Gay Straight Guy and now I'm wondering if I've jinxed myself. *sniffles* He's leaving for a half year!!!!! Ahhhhhhhhhhh!!!! I'm so depressed… Anyway, enough with my problems!! Congrats to Dark-Angel, my 75th reviewer!!!! Dark-Angel, I would give you a prize but you already got one from my other fic.

Mike: Don't forget to review! Except Emeralz that is…

P.S. BananaGirl: I hope I portrayed you to your satisfaction and if there's any probs, tell me please!


	18. Baka Jocks! Sick 'em, Vegeta!

I woke up early and, after shutting off the alarm, stepped over the still-sleeping Bana. I walked out the door and into the kitchen. Mike was already there, setting up ingredients and things so it would be as painless as possible. "What're we making today?" I asked him, looking at the cookbook over his shoulder and resting my chin on it.

"Erm, well, I was thinking we could do pancakes and waffles with a large fruit salad," he answered.

"Okay, but it'll have to be a mighty large fruit salad."

"Did you see what Bana brought yesterday? It was all fruit!" Mike opened the fridge and showed me the fruit that was nestled in every available space.

"Well, it makes sense. Her mother's a health nut and her dad and her always eat anything. So I guess she had to bring some fruit along to appease her mother."

"Ah, well. That sound good?"

"Sure." We began the baking process. Bana woke up and joined us to help.

She looked at my face closely, "Hey! Bo, you got a huge bruise on your face!" I checked my reflection in the microwave window. I sighed. She was right. I returned to the kitchen and Mike and I got her cutting the fruit and putting it in my parent's huge punch bowl while Mike and I made the pancakes and waffles.

Eventually, Bana finished with the fruit and Mike didn't need my help anymore. So Bana and I sat down at the table to talk. We didn't get to talk much as two minutes later Zar, Goten, Trunks and Kakarot burst into the room. "Where's the food?" Kakarot demanded.

"Calm down! It'll be finished in ten minutes!" Bana said, "So you're Goku?"

"Yes. Who're you?" Kakarot asked as they all sat down.

"Banana Girl, but you can call me Bana."

"So what fan are you?" Zar asked her from across the table.

"I'm a Vegeta Fan!" Bana said with pride.

"And so am I!" I grinned.

"You don't want to see the decorations of my room." Bana smiled evilly.

"Where is the Vegetable Head anyway?" I asked, looking around.

"He's still in bed I guess." Trunks said and stood, "I'll go wake him up."

"Nope! We'll wake him up!" Bana waved Trunks to sit. I shot her a querying glance as we stood. She grinned reassuringly.

"But… but…" Trunks spluttered as we walked off toward the hallway leading to the room Vegeta was staying in.

"Why are we doing it?" I asked her.

"Because! Veggie-chan's taking a _shower_!" Bana answered, "Can't you hear the water running through the pipes? And your parents' shower doesn't have foggy windows! I know because I've used it." She explained quickly.

"I thought that was from the dishwasher…" I mumbled as I followed her to the room. She silently opened the door and motioned me to follow her in. We slinked toward the open bathroom door. Stealthily, we looked around the corner and nearly fainted.

Vegeta was in the shower all right. "V-v-v-v-vegeta…" I gasped and Bana put a hand over her mouth signifying silence. Yep, we stood there for a good five minutes watching the Prince shower. He takes long showers.

Suddenly, I remembered the camera. I turned to Bana and made camera motions with my hands. She nodded vigorously and so I turned around to go fetch it. I was face to face with Trunks. I grabbed Bana's sleeve and tugged on it. She turned and then saw Trunks. We all went into the hallway and closed Vegeta's door. Then Trunks exploded.

"Why the hell were you watching my father take a shower? That's disgusting!" he snarled and for a few moments, he looked remarkably like Vegeta.

"No, no, no!" Bana said and glared at Trunks, "To you it's disgusting but to us, it's heaven."

"You hentai!" Trunks growled.

"Listen up brat!" I said and grabbed him by the shirt and picked him up off the ground. I got in his face, "If you tell anyone, especially Vegeta, I swear I will beat you to within one inch of your life, and then let you heal again. Then I will beat you again and let you heal. I will keep on doing that for a fucking year. Got it?"

"Yes ma'am." Trunks whimpered and I dropped him.

"Now scram!" I said harshly. He ran down the hall as quick as a cheetah.

"Whoa!" Bana looked at me with respect, "You got to teach me how to do that!"

"It's all in the tone." I said.

"What are you two bakas doing outside my door!" Vegeta yelled. We jumped, turning in midair. He was wearing just a towel.

"Hello Veggie-chan!" Bana said leering, "Nice towel!"

"Vegetable Head! Breakfast's done in two. You better haul ass out there or the brats will eat everything!" I said and grabbed Bana and dragged her back to the table. Before they were in hearing distance of the others, I asked Bana a question. "Bana, do you want to die an early death?"

"Nope! I just to be all I can be and see all I can see before I die!" Bana said with a wink as we entered.

"Hell yeah!" I grinned as we helped put all the food on the table. I smacked Kakarot's hand as it strayed too close to the food. "Ah, ah, ah! Noooooo touchie!" I gave him an evil eye as I set down the large fruit salad. He slouched in his chair and rubbed his hand, looking at the food longingly. Vegeta walked in and sat at his place.

"Okay," Bana and I sat down and she held up her napkin. "Ready… Set… Wait for it!" everyone gave her an odd look. She grinned back, "Go!" The Saiyans dug in with a ferociousness that surprised me again even though I had seen them eat before. Bana hurried up and put food on her plate and I quickly snapped out of it and did the same.

I watched the Saiyans eat for a moment before eating my food. I was done before them as I don't eat much in the mornings and I also eat fast though not as fast as a Saiyan. I noted that Zar was eating quicker then I was and he was eating a lot too. _Boys sure do eat a lot! _I thought to myself as I headed to the shower.

At thirty minutes to eight, we were all ready. Bana had brought her car over to my place so we worked out that she would take Mike and Vegeta to the high school and I would take Kakarot and the brats to their school then we'd meet in front of our school. For lunch, I would pick up the boys and meet Bana, Mike and the adult Saiyans at a local diner that served okay food in large quantities for a low price.

I drove at the proper speed limit, keeping an eye out for the cop that had pulled me over the other day. I didn't see him but I still kept up my guard. The boys left the car without an incident and I turned around in the parking lot. Kakarot hadn't said a word the entire time. "Why're you so silent?" I asked him curiously.

"I'm just wondering…" he answered, staring out the window. His expression was one of great sadness.

"Oh… a penny for your thoughts then," I was wondering myself what could make Kakarot sad. The guy was an eternal bubbling spring of joy!

"I'm wondering if we'll ever get home. I miss Chi-chi…" he sighed.

"Don't worry, man. I'll find a way to get you home. I swear."

"Thanks, Bouke. You're a good kid." Kakarot grinned slightly and I pulled into a parking space next to Bana's car.

"Yeah, well don't get mushy on me." I opened the door and stepped out. Bana and Mike greeted us while Vegeta just stood with his arms crossed, wearing a look that me think of the movie _Little Nicky_. "What's the matter Vegeta? Someone shove a pineapple up your ass?" I asked him with a taunting smile.

"Shut up, ikeike," he said sourly and glared at some people that were coming up from behind us. I turned and almost groaned aloud. It was the popular people but mostly.

"Hey, dweeb!" one of the brainless jocks said and ruffled Mike's hair jokingly and then shoved him aside. Mike stumbled and fell.

"Leave him alone," I said in a weary voice and then muttered, "Dumb jocks…"

"Ahem, did I just hear what I think I heard?" another one of the jocks said and glared at me.

I struggled to recall his name. "Brad, don't pick a fight. Instead, why don't you do something worthwhile and pick that stick out of your ass."

"More like a tree…" Mike muttered.

"A little impertinent, aren't we?" Brad snarled and came at me till only two feet were between us.

"Whoa! I'm truly surprised that you knew such a big word!" Bana said in a voice that mixed amazement and a little sarcasm.

"Don't get into this one, shorty," Brad growled at her.

Vegeta stomped up, "Who are you?"

Brad turned and looked at Vegeta. "Look at this, fellas! Another shrimp that thinks he's better then us!" Brad crowed.

"I will not be referred to as a food and for your information, I am better then any of you." Vegeta said in a dangerous tone. I backed up a few feet, recognizing the start of a fight when I saw one. I checked my watch and saw that there were only ten minutes till school started. More then enough time for Vegeta to wipe the floor with the group of jocks.

"Who's gonna stop me?"

"I will, weakling."

"Weakling? Look who's talking, shrimp!"

"I will beat you into a pulp if you call me a type of seafood once more."

"You and what army?"

"Oh! How original!" Vegeta said in a voice dripping with sarcasm. The next thing he said though was stated with confidence, "I need no army."

"Yeah right!" Brad cracked his knuckles and got into a fighting stance. With a smirk, Vegeta also adopted his stance. A large crowd had gather by this time so Mike, Bana, Kakarot and I got them all to back up and give the two opponents enough room. Then, we turned and watched the fight.

Brad jabbed at Vegeta's stomach. Vegeta easily moved out of the way and, with his smirk still firmly set in place, he punched Brad in his gut. Snarling, Brad launched himself bodily at Vegeta. Vegeta grabbed his fists and twisted them. Brad howled in pain. Vegeta then let go of his fists and planted an uppercut on Brad's jaw. That sent him straight into a state of unconsciousness.

"You motherfucking upstart! You'll pay for that!" yelled one of the jocks and four of them rushed Vegeta. He easily avoided the four and grabbed the jock that had yelled at him by the lower arm.

"Never, ever, _ever_ insult my mother," Vegeta hissed and then snapped the jock's lower arm, breaking both the radius and the ulna. He let go of the jock's arm and the boy dropped to the ground and writhed in pain.

"I almost feel sorry for the bastard," Bana muttered to me.

"Yeah, but he learned the hard way, like I did, not to insult Vegeta's mother." I said, touching my bruise lightly. Vegeta then turned to the other three jocks who were not using what little brains they had but rushing Vegeta again instead. Vegeta grabbed two of them by the heads and smashed them together. Needless to say, they were laid out cold. The last one Vegeta socked in the gut and then laced his fingers together and smashed them into the guy's back. He hit the ground with a crunching sound. Something had broken. Vegeta nudged one of the fallen jocks, evoking a moan of pain. He turned to what was left of their group.

"Get these bakas out of my sight now before I decide to finish them off." Vegeta growled at the remaining jocks. They hurriedly picked up their fallen comrades and retreated, shaking fists and yelling insults over their shoulders.

"Yeah! Run back to your mother's skirts!" Mike called after them.

"Run, pussyboys, run!" I shouted.

"And don't let us see your faces again!" Bana added.  We turned to Vegeta and Kakarot. They were looking at us.

"Bouke, Bana?" Vegeta said.

"Yes Vegeta?" Bana answered and I nervously bit my lip.

"Which of these machines are owned by that group of bakas?"

"Those six over there, Vegeta." I pointed to the expensive cars. Vegeta raised a hand and blasted the cars into scrap metal. Bana, Mike and I grinned evilly. The jocks weren't going anywhere soon.

"Hey, guys? What was the big deal about Vegeta laying that guy and his buddies flat?" Kakarot asked.

"Well, that was the captain of the football team." Bana said.

"And almost his entire team." I added.

"So?" Vegeta said.

"Never mind…" I sighed, "Let's go. The bell's going to ring in a minute." We all headed toward our first classes.

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Jeril: Many tanx to Rogue for reminding me I've been going OOC on Vegeta. Another chap! Don't you people love me? *crickets chirp* Okay… I guess that answers my question. *Vegeta and Kakarot laugh at Jeril* Hey! It's not my fault that I was born with a low IQ!

Vegeta: Stupid people shouldn't breed Jeril!

Jeril: Shut up you bakayaro…

Kakarot: Language, language! Kids might be reading this fic!

Jeril: *sticks her tongue out at Kakarot* Nah nah nah! *coughs* Ahem, if you would like one more person to be added to the "party", please review and tell me. If I get more then six people saying they'd like to see another person added to the sleepover, I'll do it. And it might be one of you reviewers…


	19. Making an Entrance!

Bana and I walked into Ms. Piers' class and sat down at our seats. Ms. Piers looked at the Saiyans as they took their seats on either side of me in extra seats. Then she turned her attention to Bana.

"I see you've come back from your trip to Hawaii," Ms. Piers spat.

"Yep, and the beaches were great!" Bana grinned from the seat behind me. Ms. Piers looked pissed and she walked over to the chalkboard where she began to write stuff down in hard, bold print. She had always wanted to go to Hawaii and when Bana had announced she was going, she stormed out of the classroom and didn't return for the entire day.

Rachel walked into the classroom. She spied Bana, the guys and me and angled for the seat next to me. When she reached us, she dropped her stuff down on her desk and then _tripped_ into Kakarot's lap. She did her best "ditz" look and she smiled at Kakarot, "Hello! Have we met?"

"I don't think so! My name's Kakarot! What's yours?" Kakarot asked cheerfully, not recognizing the signs of an interested teenager.

"My name's Rachel! I lost my number, can I have yours?"

"I don't have a number…" Kakarot looked confused by the pickup line.

"Those clothes of yours look real good but they'd look even better crumpled up on my bedroom floor." Rachel winked at him.

"Why would they… oh…" Kakarot's face caught on fire.

"If your right leg is Christmas and your left leg is Thanksgiving, can I come and visit you in between the holidays?" Rachel was enjoying herself immensely. Kakarot quickly shoved Rachel off his lap and into her seat.

"How rude…" Rachel muttered and got out her books.

"Hey! Back off, Rach! They're mine!" Bana snarled.

Rachel glared at Bana and Bana glared right back. I could tell they had just found something to fight about. Like they always did. Rachel then turned from Bana with an arrogant flip of her hair and looked at me, "How dumb are your uncles?"

"One or two beers short of a six-pack." I answered.

Yet again, Kakarot looked confused. "But I don't drink beer…"

"Use your brain, Kakarot! The ikeikes just insulted you!" Vegeta exploded.

"Hey, they also insulted you, Veggie-chan!" Bana said and smirked at Vegeta. I saw the gears were working in her head. _She's planning something… Shit…_ When Bana planned something, the world went to hell in a hand basket.

Vegeta turned his hot glare on her and growled, "Do not call me that name."

"Which name? There's 'Vegetable Head', 'Veggie-chan', 'Veggie Head' and," she grinned wickedly, "my own personal favorite: 'Skittles'."

"Skittles?" Vegeta roared and I burst out laughing followed closely by Bana and Kakarot.

"How the hell did you get Skittles out of that?" Rachel asked.

"I wanted something original that no one else would use!" Bana gasped out and then laughed some more.

"I WILL NOT BE CALLED BY ANY NAME OTHER THEN MY OWN!" Vegeta stood up and bellowed.

"Temper, temper, Vegetable Head. You're making quite a scene." I grinned at him.

"I don't care what these humans think. I'll blast them all and…"

"Can everyone sit down please and not cause any more disruptions!" Ms. Piers shouted, giving Vegeta the evil eye. Amazingly he sat down, though his scowl was set firmly in place and he stared at Ms. Piers through the entire class.

"Three plus eleven equals fourteen, correct?" Mrs. Griffon asked Goten during Math class.

"Uh," he scratched his head and thought for a moment, "Yeah. It does."

"Good. Now, we will look to the next page where…"

"But Mrs. Griffon! It's recess time!" Shane called out.

"You're right. All right, class is dismissed," Mrs. Griffon said and sat down. The children all got up and grabbed their snacks. Goten and Trunks broke out their "snacks": two large bags of potato chips, two bunches of bananas, four peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, and last, but not least, two large tubs of soup. All the children watched in amazement as Goten and Trunks scarfed the entire batch in just under ten minutes.

Zar watched with boredom though. He had already seen them eat and he had finished his snack of cookies. He sighed. "Nothing fun to do, Kami am I bored."

Suddenly, he heard a thumping sound in the coat closet. Zar slinked over to it and looked around. Everyone was occupied with a game or food. He cracked the door open and peeked in. "H-hello?" he asked in a timid voice. Then he steeled himself and said in a better one, "Hello?"

"Hey, kid! Can you help me out of here?" answered a familiar voice.

"Sure!" Zar opened the door all the way and parted the coats while trying to remember where he had heard the voice.

The figure stepped out, "Thanks, kid! My name's…"

"Kami!" Zar gulped at the man.

"No, no, no! I'm not Kami! I'm…" the man said, looking at Zar strangely.

"I know who you are! Stay here for a minute, please! I need to go get some people." Zar rushed over to where Trunks and Goten were throwing away their trash. He gasped out, "We have a problem!"

I sat and twiddled my thumbs. Science period was almost over and Mr. Eveans was acting almost as weird as normal. We were back on the eye and it was boring. _I wish Mr. Eveans would point out all the muscles on Vegeta. But then again, Veggie would probably kill him if he tried._ I sighed and looked at the clock. _Zar and his buddies are at recess right now. Lucky buggers. I wish we still had naptime… I sure need it._ I rubbed my sticky eyes and yawned.

Then, out of nowhere, a figure appeared standing next to Mr. Eveans who was pointing out the parts of the eye on a chart. My eyes widened in shock as I recognized the tall figure. "Vegeta, Kakarot," I hissed quietly, knowing that their Saiyan hearing would pick up what I say, "get him out of here and into the hallway."

They both nodded and stood up. The new arrival saw them and was about to speak when Mr. Eveans yelled, "Who are you and why are you in my classroom?"

"My name is…" the person's answer was cut off as Kakarot and Vegeta grabbed both of his arms and hauled him of the room.

"Bouke! Explain!" Mr. Eveans snarled at me as I stood.

"That's my cousin, sir! He's a magician and he likes to make an entrance! I didn't know he was visiting so soon! Eh, can I go talk to him?" I stammered, picking up my book bag while shoving books in.

"Yes, but make it quick!"

"Thanks!" I bounded out of the classroom and out the still open door. I slammed it behind me and whirled around to face the newcomer. "What the hell are you doing here?" I growled.

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Jeril: 101 REVIEWS!!!!! MMY KAMI!!!!!! *gets herself under control* Ahem… soory for taking so long about getting this chap out… *grimace* I had to go on three day trip with my class. *sniffles* Please forgive me!!

Kakarot: Jeril, it's not too nice to leave them hanging…

Vegeta: It's perfectly all right! Those bakas don't deserve to know who the two new people are!

Jeril: A cliffhanger!! Muwhahahahahahaha! *runs away from the rotten fruit and veggies being thrown at her* I swear I'll have the next chap out by tomorrow!


	20. Awh, shit! There goes my History grade!

*is holed up in a bunker being pummeled with rotten fruit and trash of all types* I'm sorry! I'm really sorry I didn't get this out yesterday!

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"Who the fuck are you?" the tall Namek growled the question at me.

"The name's Bouke," I snarled back, "Now answer my question!"

"Piccolo! How did you get here?" Kakarot asked the green alien.

"Bulma invented a device to track your life energy and another to transport Krillin and I to wherever you were," Piccolo held up a little machine that looked remarkably like a Gameboy.

I swiped it, "I'll hold this until we get to the brats." I said and tucked it in my jacket pocket.

"Give. That. Back." Piccolo said in a dangerous voice.

"Shut up, pickle." I said as the bell rang, "I don't take orders from anyone except myself." I remembered what class was next, "Next class is…"

Out of nowhere a fist came hurtling toward my stomach. My reflexes only allowed me time to see it and begin to bring my hands to block it before it hit. Spittle flew from my mouth and hit the floor as I dropped to my knees.

"Why'd you do that, Piccolo?" Kakarot asked and kneeled next to where I was gasping and clutching my stomach, "Are you okay?"

"Do I look okay?" I gasped out, breathing hard.

"You need to learn some manners, girl," Piccolo informed me as kids began to pour out of the classrooms.

Bana came out and saw Piccolo, "Hey! It's Piccolo! Awesome!"

"Why is your cousin green?" Rachel asked me and arched an eyebrow.

"I am not…" Piccolo started.

"He's not all together upstairs," I hissed to Rachel as I clambered to my feet.

Her face took on a look of understanding, "I see. Well, I'll see you at lunch!" She ran off with one backwards glance at Piccolo and the Saiyans.

"Wait! Where is the cue ball?" Vegeta said gruffly.

"What? Is the Saiyan no Ouji worried about a human weakling?" I asked in all seriousness.

"No. I am merely curious as to why the Namek is here and the human is not."

"Oh."

"Maybe…" Kakarot scratched his head, "Maybe he's with the boys!"

"Why would he be with the brats, Kakarot? It wouldn't make sense for them to have been transported to two different places!" Vegeta snorted.

"Search for him with your ki sense," Bana suggested.

"I was just about to say that," Vegeta said as he closed his eyes. Bana and I locked gazes and simultaneously we rolled our eyes.

"Well?" I asked after a few moments. Bana was tapping her foot impatiently. We had to get to our next class soon.

"He is with the boys," Kakarot grinned.

"Hmph!" Vegeta stalked off toward the Science classroom.

"Skittles was wrong!" Bana said to me in a singsong voice as we all followed Vegeta.

"It looks like Veggie boy doesn't know everything!" I smirked. Vegeta was able to hear us but for some reason, he wasn't doing anything. Idly, I wondered what had happened to the noseless wonder when he arrived in the classroom.

The three boys ran back to the newcomer, "Krillin!" Goten gave the short man a hug.

"What are you doing here?" Trunks asked while hugging Krillin from the other side.

"Well, when you and your dads didn't come back, Bulma decided to make a machine to bring you back. I don't know the details about it but she was able to make two different machines. One detected your life energy, no matter if you were dead, on another planer or even in another dimension!" Krillin chuckled at the last one while Goten and Trunks exchanged grimaces, "The other was a transport device. Bulma and Chi-chi told Piccolo and I to get in it."

"And?" Zar prompted.

"Well," Krillin rubbed the back of his head where a large bump was, "I don't remember anything because I said I wasn't going. I said I had a wife and daughter to take care of. That was a bad move as Chi-chi began screaming to me about how ungrateful I was and I didn't deserve to be called 'friend' by Goku. I was just about to say I'd go when she whacked me on the head with that frying pan of hers. Hard. I was knocked out and I guess they threw me in the machine anyway."

"Where's Piccolo?" Goten looked around.

"I dunno. He has the transport device too," Krillin closed his eyes and searched out Piccolo with his ki sense, "He's with your dad's. I wonder why we got separated…"

"I guessed we'll see him at lunch then!" Trunks said cheerfully.

"Who's he?" Krillin asked Goten while pointing at Zar.

"That's Zaretu. He's letting us live at his place until we can get back home." Goten answered and wandered over to where Trunks was playing "Go Fish" with some other kids.

"Hello," Zar offered his hand to Krillin.

"Hey," Krillin shook his hand.

"Listen. We got to make up a story about you. You'll be my uncle, okay?"

"Your uncle?" Krillin scratched his head, "Okay, I guess."

"Hello, Zar. Who is this?" Mrs. Griffon had walked over to the two conversers.

"This is my uncle Krillin. Krillin, this is my teacher, Mrs. Griffon." Zar introduced them to each other.

"Hi!" Krillin shook Mrs. Griffon's hand with a smile.

"Excuse me for being blunt, but why don't you have a nose?" Mrs. Griffon asked, peering at the shorter man.

"I just don't." Krillin answered with a sigh.

"Ah, I see. How come I didn't see you arrive?" Krillin looked to Zar for help on that one.

Zar jumped in, "He came in through the outside door."

"Yeah, sorry ma'am." Krillin added.

"That's okay, but next time please use the regular door. Will you be joining us for the rest of the day?"

"Yes."

"Well, class is starting now so if Zar would be so kind as to show you to your seat…" Zar grabbed Krillin's arm and dragged him over to his seat. Goten and Trunks had brought over an extra chair in anticipation of where Krillin was to be seated.

When Mrs. Griffon noticed Zar trying to fit three people around him, she called out, "Zar, if you wish they can be seated at the activity tables. That way it would be easier for you to get to your desk."

Zar smiled his thanks and showed Krillin and the chibis where to seat. He then returned to his seat and the class quieted down for the lesson.

"Kami! We're going home!" Kakarot mused to himself.

"And I'm going to have the house to myself finally…" I sighed happily, "This day couldn't get any better!"

Have you ever heard of Murphy's Law_? If anything can go wrong, it will go wrong._ Well, that law is my life. As soon as I walked into the classroom, Mr. Green saw the transport machine sticking out of my pocket.

"And what is this?" the History teacher snarled and picked the device out of my pocket.

"Uh, it's a…" I fumbled for something.

"A Gameboy!" Bana came to my rescue… or so she thought.

"You know I don't tolerate games or music machines in my class!" Mr. Greene's nostrils flared as he picked up a hammer, "I shall have to make an example of this, Ms. Enda." Quickly, almost as fast as a Saiyan, he brought the hammer down on the transportation device.

"No!" Piccolo hissed.

"We can't go home now…" Kakarot whispered. I heard a low, guttural growling coming from behind me. I turned to see Vegeta standing there. The vein on his forehead was throbbing and he was looking savagely at Mr. Greene.

"Don't do it Vegeta," Kakarot said to the Saiyan no Ouji. With a primal roar, Vegeta lunged at the History teacher and grabbed him by the throat.

"Awh, shit…" I said to myself, "There goes my History grade…"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kakarot: Jeril told us to do the Author Note as she is in that bunker of hers. She says she's not coming out until you all forgive her and swear not to hurt her… especially DeathStorm.

Vegeta: Though you don't have to keep the promise. Really, you don't!

Kakarot: Vegeta! That's not nice! I wouldn't like it if you all hurt Jeril!

Vegeta: Come on, Kakarot! It's you against all of us! Jeril is going down!

Kakarot: Whatever Vegeta… *pulls out a piece of paper* Jeril told me to read this to you all. Ahem! "Muwhahahaha! Nobody guessed it'd be Krillin! I'm good! Uh huh! But then again, almost everyone guessed it'd be Piccolo." *sighs and tears up the paper* She's got some issuses… Vegeta? Didn't she tell you to say something?

Vegeta: Yeah. In the first chap it said her sister was her little sister. That was a typo. Bouke has an older sister and that mistake has now been changed. *muses to himself* I wonder if I get to kill that baka, Mr. Greene…


	21. Deliverance! It can work wonders!

Mr. Greene squawked in fear as Vegeta picked him up by the throat. "You bastard…" Vegeta hissed and then slammed Mr. Greene into the wall. By into, I mean _into_. Mr. Greene had created a three-inch deep hole in the wall. I watched with amusement as Mr. Greene wet his pants.

"Shit… that's impressive…" I heard a mutter from one of my classmates. _Heh, that's nothing compared to how he fights in a spar…_ I thought to them. Others called out things like "Cute ass there on the guy who's whooping Mr. Greene's!" and "Kill him!" and "Damn, I wish I could do that!" and "Beat him down!" Needless to say, Mr. Greene wasn't a very popular teacher.

I heard Kakarot yelp and then rub his posterior. I surmised one of my classmates had pinched it. I returned my attention to the Saiyan no Ouji.

"What will I do with you?" Vegeta hissed loudly at Mr. Greene who whimpered in fear, "Maybe I should rip off your fingers one by one and then your toes. Then slit your wrists and watch you bleed to death? Or how about…"

Suddenly, three girls who we called the Cheerleader Wannabes jumped up from their seats. They began chanting and doing a routine, "Vegeta, Vegeta! He's our man! If he can't kill him, no one can! Go Vegeta!" Vegeta sent them a glare and they sat down. 

Vegeta kneed Mr. Greene in the crotch and then looked at his now wet knee in disgust. He growled in Mr. Greene's face, "I should kill you, you pathetic baka, but I do not wish to soil my hands with your blood." He released his grip on Mr. Greene's throat and the teacher went crashing to the ground. Mr. Greene gurgled and rubbed his throat where a dark, livid bruise was already beginning to form.

The class cheered ecstatically. I grinned and said loudly, "Eh. I'm glad you all enjoyed the entertainment but we got to fly! See you tomorrow!" Bana and I pushed Kakarot and Vegeta toward the door and Piccolo followed us with a more dignified air. I noticed someone was missing and I turned around. I saw Mike on his knees, picking up all the little pieces of the busted transport device. The almost intact device was in his pocket. "Mike! Come on!" he stood and hurried out after us.

"Why did you pick up the pieces?" Kakarot asked him as we hurried down the hallway toward the exit.

"Because I think…" Mike's answer was cut off by my shout.

"Damn! Mike, we can't leave!" I smashed in a nearby locker.

"Whoa… Bouke learn to control your anger. Remember: Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, and hates leads to the Dark Side." Mike said in a Yoda-like voice.

"I'm not afraid, you baka." I muttered.

"Yes, you are! You are afraid that they will leave the school and will kill people."

"Shut up…"

"But fear not, my dear friend! I have," he reached into a pocket and pulled out a small circular tablet, "your Deliverance!"

"I could kiss you, Mike!" I called out and grabbed the pill.

"Now, whatever you do, _don't_ swallow it!" Mike said with a little smile.

"Hentai…" I muttered and stomped towards the nurse's office. Before I entered the office though, I put the tablet on my tongue and began the countdown. It immediately began to dissolve and I grimaced at the nasty taste. I walked shakily into the office. "Nurse Perini?"

"Yes?" the nurse looked up from her desk.

"I don't feel so well…" she looked at me with a worried expression. _8… 9… 10!_ I felt the bile rise in my throat and I spewed my breakfast all over her floor.

"Oh dear…" she said quietly and rushed around the throw up and over to my side. She eased me into a chair. "Let me call your parents so they can come pick you up."

"No need," I said in a weak, sickly voice, "My uncles came to school with me. They can take me home." Mike staggered in at that moment.

"Nurse…" he lost his cookies on her floor also.

"Well, I have quite a collection here," Nurse Perini said with a small chuckle. She helped Mike into his chair. When she turned her back to walk outside to talk to my uncles, Mike shot me a wink. I returned it. Deliverance! It works every time!

We heard Bana complain she hadn't been feeling too good either. Then she explained that she and Mike were spend the night at my place so there was no need for Nurse Perini to call their parents. The nurse then told Vegeta and Kakarot that we all needed plenty of sleep and rest. Mike and I took that as our cue to stagger out of the office, pale and sick looking.

"Come on," Kakarot put a supportive arm around my shoulders, "We'll take you home now." I shuddered slightly. Kakarot's arm was around me? I felt nauseous. _This is just nasty!_ I hissed to myself.

"Wait! I have something to say to the girls," Nurse Perini ushered us closer to her. We leaned in to hear her better as she whispered, "Remember girls: abstinence is good, but if you must, use protection." She gave us a few small, square packages. I gingerly slipped them into my pocket. _Oh Kami… she just gave us… ew… with Mike? Bleh, there's a nasty mental picture for you…_ Bana and I looked at each other and I could see she was thinking the same thing. We hurriedly said good-bye to the nurse and walked down the hallway toward the exit of the school.

As soon as we were out of eyesight of the nurse, I got Kakarot's arm off me fast. "Don't touch me again, okay?" I said.

"Okay," Kakarot scratched the back of his head, "But why not?"

"Because… well… just don't." I couldn't think of a really good reason other then my heart was set on Vegeta so I finished the statement lamely. He shrugged and we continued on toward the cars. We stopped before getting in.

Mike checked his watch, "We've got an hour to kill before the chibis get their lunch break. What are we going to do?"

"How about pizza?" Kakarot suggested.

"No. We are going to eat in an hour! You don't need food now!" Bana hissed at him.

"But I'm hungry!" Kakarot complained.

"You can have a snack sometime before lunch," Mike gave in.

I had a sudden inspiration, "How about the Arcade?"

"I was just thinking that!" Mike said.

"Great minds think alike," I grinned.

"Good choice!" Bana nodded, "It has pizza and ice cream for Goku and games for the rest of us!" she glanced at Piccolo and then amended her statement, "most of the rest of us."

"All right! Bana, you take…" I started.

"I'll take Skittles and Kakarot! You can take Pickle and Mike!" she grinned evilly and, before I could complain, rushed Kakarot and Vegeta into her car. I growled as she drove off and then swore to myself that I'd get her back somehow.

I turned and saw that Piccolo and Mike had already climbed into the car. Piccolo was in the back and Mike was sitting up front. I climbed into the driver's seat and turned the key in the ignition.

The Arcade was a ten-minute ride from the school and those ten minutes were spent in silence. I pulled into a parking space next to Bana's car and when I got out she grinned at me. "I'll get you back," I snarled and she just laughed.

"Come on, Bouke! Lighten up!" I snorted, "You're too uptight! This is an Arcade! Have _fun_!" I sighed and managed a small smile.

"I smell pepperoni pizza with double cheese! And chocolate ice cream!" Kakarot panted.

"If you drool Kakarot, I will kick you in the pills, and that would not make Chi-chi happy," I growled.

"Pills? What pills?" Kakarot looked confused.

"She will kick you where it will hurt you a great deal. Okay?" Mike simplified it.

"Ah, I see!" Kakarot nodded and the Saiyans and Piccolo followed Mike, Bana and I inside.

I pulled out my wallet and got twenty dollars exchanged for quarters at the counter. I gave each person, except Piccolo and Kakarot, five dollars worth. "Mike, Bana, show Vegeta the ropes," I said and then added as an afterthought, "And try to make sure he doesn't blast anything." They nodded and brought Vegeta over to a racing game.

"All right, Kakarot," I sighed as Kakarot stood in front of the ordering portion with a hungry gleam to his eye. Piccolo had found an unobtrusive corner to meditate in, "What types of pizzas do you want?"

After Kakarot had finished his pizzas and Vegeta had ripped the control stick off one of the games, we quickly, but nonchalantly, left. Once again, Bana got Vegeta and Kakarot into her car before I could protest. With a sigh, I ushered Piccolo and Mike into my car and then we drove to Zar's school following Bana's.

The chibis were waiting outside with Krillin. "Hey reishi! Look, look! It's Krillin!" Zar yelled at me as we all scrambled out of the car.

"I know gutei. Now stop shouting, you're giving me a headache." I muttered and rubbed my head.

"Sorry," he said in a subdued voice and then he saw Piccolo, "IT'S PICCOLO-SAMA!" he ran over to Piccolo then dropped to his knees and grabbed Piccolo's ankle, "It's really you! Oh my Kami! I've dreamed of meeting you and here you are!"

"Zar!" I grabbed my little brother by the back of the shirt and tried to pull him back, "Calm down!"

"Get off me!" Piccolo growled and shook his leg but Zar held on like a leech.

"I thought that the brat worshipped me…" I heard Vegeta mutter.

"He worships both you and Piccolo equally." I explained.

"Why didn't he act like that when I first arrived?"

"One, he knows you wouldn't blasted him to hell. Two, I was there."

"Why would that stop him?"

"Eh… because he knew that I wouldn't like it if he acted in such an unbecoming way… and… yeah," I stopped talking because I knew I was messing it up more. I turned my attention back to where Goten and Trunks were trying to peel my brother off Piccolo's leg, "Zar!" my brother looked at me, "Do the words 'little wooden box' mean anything to you?"

"It means a lot, actually!" Zar let go of the Namek's leg and jumped up, brushing his clothes off, "So, where are we eating?"

"Well, I was thinking Sub…" I wasn't able to finish my sentence.

"No. Way." Vegeta said dangerously.

"How about McDonalds!" Zar suggested.

"Yeah! McDonalds! I'm craving ketchup and fries!" Mike agreed.

"Sounds good to me." Bana shrugged.

"McDonalds it is then." I sighed and then glared at Bana, "Veggie burger, Carrot Brain and their brats are coming with me!"

"Okay! Come on Pickle, Chrome Dome, and the two bakas! We're going to eat!" Bana said cheerfully. We piled into the different cars and sped off toward our destination. I grinned evilly at the thought of the torture that the people at the fast food joint were about to receive.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: Well, I'm glad you all forgave me. Also, I tried to make this chap longer springwarrior! I really did! Oh my Kami! SSJSkaterTrunks reviewed my story!!! *runs around screaming* I must be dreaming!

Kakarot: She's gone mad!

Jeril: *calms down* Ahem! Kitten! Congrats on being my 125th reviewer! For your prize, you will get what you wished for. *grins evilly* Just wait till the next chap or maybe the one after that. Now Vegeta, do the disclaimer!

Vegeta: I will do no such thing! It is unbefitting a Saiyan no Ouji and besides, I will not take orders from a weak human such as yourself!

Jeril: *holds up a teddy bear with a Saiyan armor outfit on* Do it or I will rip Shnookums arms off and then set his head on fire! Then I will give him to my new puppy to chew on!

Vegeta: *in one breath* Jerildoesn'townYodaorMcdonalds! *gasps* There! Are you happy? NOW GIVE ME SHNOOKUMS-SAMA! *grabs Shnookums from Jeril and pets his head while whispering comforting words in his ear*

Kakarot: Shnookums? *bursts out laughing*

Vegeta: Don't laugh at Shnookums-sama! *growls threateningly at Kakarot who just keeps on laughing. Vegeta mutters* No respect, I get no respect… huh, Shnookums-sama?


	22. No, better make that 15 and Super Size t...

"I'd like four number fives, Super Sized and ten of each of the other Value Meals. No, better make that fifteen and Super Size them all." I smiled at the man behind the counter.

He looked at me, "Dude, you're joking, right?"

"No, though I wish I was from the amount this is going to cost. My family eats a lot."

"Uh, okay. Let me ring this up. Man… even my brothers and me don't eat as much as that…" He muttered to himself as he rung up the food and I paid the abhorrent amount.

"Thanks…" I muttered half-heartedly and moved on down to where I would pick up the food. I sent Zar and the chibis to where we would sit. I chuckled quietly to myself as I saw the people who assembled the meals stare at the monitor for a few moments in disbelief. Then, slowly, they started to get the great amount of food together. "Kakarot, stop drooling." I hissed in disgust, "Remember my threat…"

"But… but… food…" Kakarot looked like he was about to leap over the counter and attack the people with the fast food.

"Kakarot, if you so much as touch one fry before we sit down, I swear I will cut off your hand."

"Okay…" Kakarot sighed and watched the last of the food be placed on one of the trays. Mike, Vegeta, Kakarot, Piccolo, Bana, Krillin and I all grabbed two trays and there were still six left. We brought those back to our tables and then Mike, Krillin and I headed back for the last trays.

I tapped one of the ladies assembling the meals on the shoulder. "Excuse me," I said politely, "Can I have five cups for water?" She nodded and gave me the water cups. I followed Mike and Krillin back to the tables and then moved the stuff off one of the trays and onto another. I brought the tray and the cups back to the drink area, aware of all the odd looks our food was getting. I got a handful of straws and then filled up four of the cups with ketchup and the fifth with water. That got even more odd looks.

When I sat back down at one of the two tables, I handed Piccolo his water. He eyed it suspiciously before taking it. "Straw or no?" I asked him, watching the Saiyans and Krillin get their drinks out of the corner of my eye.

"Yeah, I'll take a straw." I handed it to him and then turned back to my meal of Chicken McNuggets and fries… which wasn't there.

I turned a frosty glare on Zar. "What?" he asked innocently, holding my meal and his close, "I'm hungry!"

"Give. Me. My. Food." I snarled. He gulped and gave me back the food. I smiled sweetly, "Thanks." I turned to face across the table and my gaze met Mike's.

"You like McDonalds, huh?" he asked.

"How could you tell?" I answered sarcastically.

"By all the ketchup you brought the Saiyans," he answered, pointing a fry in their direction. I looked and nearly gagged. Kakarot had ketchup smeared over his face and his son looked the same. Even Vegeta had a large blob in his hair that he hadn't noticed yet. Only Trunks was eating with a minimum of a mess. He just had a small splatter on his chin.

"Messy eaters…" Bana observed.

"No duh!" Mike grinned.

"Even my cousin didn't do that with his ketchup at the age of two!" I said in disgust as Goten rubbed his face with a sleeve, rubbing the ketchup into his eyebrows.

"I feel ill…" Mike mumbled, putting a hand on his mouth.

Bana got my attention by tapping on my shoulder. She looked at my brother oddly, "Is it just me, or your brother's learning their eating habits?"

"What?" I looked at Zar. Sure enough, the little bastard had eaten two Super Sized Value Meals and was working his way through a third. "What the hell?" I muttered quietly.

"I told you, sis!" Zar grinned through a mouth filled with half-chewed chicken nuggets and fries, "I'm hungry!"

"Excuse me!" Mike stood up suddenly and ran toward the bathroom.

"Poor guy…" Zar grinned wickedly and then ate another fry, "Luckily, he didn't eat much of his food before he felt the need." He reached a hand toward Mike's unprotected Big Mac™. I grabbed his wrist and pressed down hard on the pressure point. With a small yelp, he jerked his hand out of my grip and nursed it while glaring at me. "Fat ass bitch…" he muttered.

"I heard that you little bastard. Now, read my lips: I don't have to take _any_ shit from you because, at this moment, I don't feel like dealing with it! I've had a very stressful, and money leaching, day and I don't need you fucking it up any more." I felt someone tap on my shoulder, "What?" I snarled and turned.

A girl of about my age was standing behind my chair. She wore black clothing, was about as tall as Vegeta and reminded me vaguely of him. She gave me an unnerving Vegeta-like smirk and said, "Is the brat annoying?"

"Yeah. Who're you?" I was scared by her use of the word 'brat'. I blinked, "Wait, you're Rogue, right? From the AAC?"

"Yeah, and you're Omega!" Rogue stuck out a hand and we shook.

"Well, what do want?" I said, trying to make the words come out nicely.

"I was wondering if those guys… well, the amount they're eating… and the hair… nah… sorry for wasting your time, Omega. I guess I'll see you at the next meeting." Rogue heaved a sigh and turned.

"They _are_ Saiyans." I waited to see her reaction.

"Okay…" she turned and looked at Kakarot, Vegeta and the two chibis again, "Pinch me, I must be dreaming." Mike, who had just returned from the restroom, reached over and pinched her arm. She grabbed the injured spot and glared at him for a moment, "Ow, Damn it! I didn't mean literally!"

"Sorry," I apologized for him, "Mike here's a bit slow on the uptake."

"Am not…" Mike muttered and went back to eating.

Rogue and I laughed. "Hey Rogue! It's good to see you!" Bana exclaimed. Zar noticed Rogue and looked at her with a gleam in his eye. She glared back at him and he grinned evilly. With a collective groan, we three girls retreated to the table that was not occupied by males.

"Your brother's queer." Rogue stated.

"Amen to that…" I muttered and glanced over at him. He was drawing on the table with a ketchup-covered fry.

"Is he on medication?" Bana asked.

"No, but he should be."

"Okay, the short guy with flame-like hair. That's Vegeta, correct?" Rogue asked.

"Yes, and I've claimed him." Bana growled.

"Hey! All's fair in love and war!" Rogue snarled back.

"I'm fighting for a slice of that ass too!" I said firmly, "He's mine!"

"No way! I'm going to beat you all and take that royal hunk to my place!" Bana exclaimed.

"I could beat you in a fight any day!" Rogue taunted.

"I could take you both on and whoop your…" my statement was cut short when we three noticed that the rest of our party were looking at us.

"What were you fighting about?" Zar asked, the gleam still in his eye.

"Uh…" Bana elbowed me and hissed, "Think of something quick!"

"Who's getting the right to pound your ass five feet into the ground, little brother." I grinned sadistically.

Zar gulped and, to take the spotlight off us, Mike clapped his hands together. "Okay, kids, clean up and we'll take you back to school. Then the rest of us can go back to Bouke's place to crash."

We dropped the chibis off and then headed back to my place to 'crash', as Mike put it. And crash we did. Kakarot flopped down on the couch and began to snore. Vegeta staked a claim on my dad's chair and napped there. Piccolo went to my backyard to mediate and Krillin perched on the kitchen counter to watch the small kitchen TV.

"Rogue, Bana, Bouke? Can you come in here for a sec?" Mike asked, gesturing toward the door to the garage. On the way to my house, Rogue had been told the entire story and introduced to everyone.

"Sure thing," I replied. The other two shrugged and we all followed Mike down into the garage.

"Whoa! You have a lot of technological crud down here!" Bana exclaimed as we entered the garage/workshop.

"Yeah, my tousan's literally a mad genius. Or just plain mad. He tinkers with computers and stuff, trying to make them go faster, hold more data… that kind of stuff."

"Cool."

Mike cleared his throat. We turned our attention to him. He was sitting on a workbench. "Well? Spit it out, Mike!" I said impatiently.

"We haven't got all day!" Rogue tapped her foot.

"I think… I think I know a way to send the DBZ guys home." Mike announcement was met with one reaction: wails of anguish.

"Nooooooooooooooooo!" I cried, "I need to take a picture of Vegeta naked! You can't do this to me, Mike! Think of all the things I've done for you! Please, old pal! Don't do this to me!" I grabbed his shirt and shook him hard.

"You act as if this is the end of the world!" Mike tried to pry my hands off his shirt but was unsuccessful.

"But it is!" we all wailed together.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: A kinda cliffhanger, huh? If any of you can guess what Mike is going to try, I'll… I'll… erm… give you a prize of some kind… Oh yes! I added Rogue in because she's been a loyal reviewer of this fic for many chaps and…

Vegeta: You needed to find someone to fill up empty room! Admit it! *pats Shnookums on the head absentmindedly*

Jeril: Not true! *growls at Vegeta* Be nice to me! It's my birthday today! *some person brings Jeril a cake and Jeril blows out all the candles* I wish people would review because they're nice!!

Kakarot: *is hugging a stuffed animal turtle and humming to himself*

Vegeta: *whispers to Jeril* Has Kakarot gone mad?

Kakarot: Lalala… Little Sugar Lump…

Jeril: *chortles* Sugar Lump! It's name is Sugar Lump? First, Shnookums, now Sugar Lump? What next? Honey Bear? *gets control of herself* To the reviewers: If you'd like, leave a description of yourself in your review. I may or I may not add you to my story. It all depends whether or not I need an extra character or something.

Vegeta: Jeril? Aren't you forgetting something? *holds up a furry, platypus-like creature and puts a ki blast close to it's head threateningly*

Jeril: GOOGLE!! *knees Vegeta and recovers her googles* How dare you touch Google the Googles? Bastard… *pets Google's head comfortingly*


	23. I'm never going to get laid!

"Just how do you plan to send them back anyway?" I asked as we all finally calmed down from the shock.

"Well," Mike took the busted transport device out of his pocket and placed the little bits on a table, "I'm going to fix this. Or try to at least."

I grinned and glanced at Bana and Rogue, "You thinking what I'm thinking?" I hissed.

"Let's get it!" Bana roared and we all dove at Mike. Rogue pinned his arms behind him while I grabbed the device and Bana swept the little pieces off the table. Then, while Rogue kept Mike immobile, Bana and I headed over to a blender that we had seen at the same time and for some odd reason my tousan kept down in the garage. I turned it on to "puree" and began to lower the teleport device into it.

"STOP!" I heard a shout and before I knew it, the short ex-monk had grabbed the device and pieces. He kicked Rogue in the back of the knee and she shrieked in pain, releasing Mike as she collapsed to the floor.

"You bastard!" Rogue and I snarled simultaneously.

"You kicked me!" Rogue continued.

"How dare you ruin my chance of getting naked pictures of Vegeta?" I yelled before I realized whom I was yelling this at.

"Pictures… of Vegeta… naked?" Krillin looked ill.

"You just don't have an appreciation of men, baldy!" Rogue yelled at Krillin.

"Yeah, and I'm glad I don't!" Krillin handed the device and pieces to Mike and then staggered out muttering, "Naked Vegeta… Oh Kami, bad image there… I'm going to need some coffee… I doubt I'll be able to sleep for a while now..."

"That good-for-nothing, short, son of a cheap dollar whore insulted my Skittles! I'll beat his flabby, nasty-looking ass till he's six feet under!" Bana growled and Rogue nodded in agreement.

"I don't see what 18 saw in that creep." Rogue agreed.

"You got to admit one good thing about him though." I said.

"And what, in Kami's good and holy name, would that be?" Rogue asked me angrily. I surmised she disliked Krillin so much that a good word or two about him amounted to blasphemy in her mind.

"He's at least better then Master Roshi!" I cracked up and soon all of us, including Mike, were laughing.

"What's all the laughing about?" Kakarot asked as he came down the stairs scratching his head.

"Don't worry your thick head, baka." I said, wiping the excess water from my eyes.

"Oh… okay!" Kakarot grinned stupidly, "What were you all down here for?"

"I think I can fix the…" I slapped my hand over Mike's mouth before he could continue.

"He's not sure!" I tried to make the grin I had plastered on my face look real.

"Yeah! He'll get back to you later!" Bana put on a cheesy smile.

"So, bye!" Rogue hinted loudly.

"EW!" I screamed, as I felt something slimy running over my hand. I jerked my hand off Mike's mouth and wiped it off on his shirt. "Mike! That's disgusting!"

"Ohhhhhhhhh… I get it." Kakarot winked at us, "I'll leave you all alone." He grinned the goofy Son Grin™ and went back up the stairs.

"Oh…" Bana started.

"My…" Rogue whispered

"Kami…" I finished.

"That's just nasty…" Rogue blinked a few times.

"No offense meant Mike, but you aren't really…" I couldn't finish.

"What's wrong with me?" Mike asked, his eyes beginning to tear.

"Nothing really, it's just…" Bana started and looked to me for help.

"You just aren't…" I continued and then looked at Rogue.

"I JUST MET HIM! DON'T LOOK AT ME!" Rogue howled.

"I'm never going to get laid!" Mike yelled and began to cry. We girls lifted our eyebrows and watched him sob into his hands.

"We'll go upstairs and wait for you to fix that device."  I said and we ran up the stairs. We stopped in the hall. "Okay, what we can hope for here and what is probably going to happen, is that Bulma's technology is too complex for Mike to understand."

"Yeah, after all, Bulma is the most intelligent person on their Earth," Rogue agreed.

"Now, what will we do to keep Vegeta, Kakarot and the rest occupied until Mike's done?" Rogue wondered.

"Hmmm…" we lapsed into contemplative silence.

Suddenly, I heard a familiar song playing from the living room. "My Kami…" I whispered and walked towards it. Bana and Rogue followed me.

"Then it must be my un-Birthday too!" a girlish voice chimed from the TV set. I snorted with laughter. There, zoned out on the couch, were Vegeta, Piccolo and Kakarot watching 'Alice in Wonderland' of all things!

"Hehe! I guess we don't need to find something to occupy them!" Bana chuckled quietly.

"That's crazy! Piccolo and Veggie of all people!" Rogue grinned, "I mean, Kakarot, I can believe that. But Vegeta and Piccolo?" I myself was having a lot of trouble containing my laughter. Finally, I couldn't control it anymore and it burst forth in a torrent of loud chuckles.

Vegeta jumped up and hit the off button on the TV. "Hey!" Piccolo yelled, "It was just getting to the good…" he noticed us, "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?" Kakarot stared at the blank screen, a trickle of drool running out of the corner of his mouth. _Maybe watching TV was what makes him so dumb…_ I wonder, remembering those studies about TV frying your brain.

"It's my house, pickle. And I want to know, why are you watching a Disney movie? Those are for five year olds!" I chuckled.

"Shut up, ikeike! I was researching your worthless animation!" I noticed there was a stack of the Disney movies by the TV. They were arranged in order of date and I noticed that 'Snow White and the Seven Dwarves' had already been opened.

"You watched Snow White?" tears of laughter were running down my face. Bana and Rogue were also laughing uncontrollably.

"Oh yeah? Research, huh?" Rogue was almost hyperventilating she was laughing so hard.

"I just think you like those movies!" Bana gasped out.

"Well, the songs are kind of catchy…" Vegeta slapped a hand over Piccolo's mouth. Kakarot was still staring at the blank screen.

Rogue began laughing more, "This is too rich! Vegeta and Piccolo watching Disney movies and liking the songs!"

"SHUT UP!" Vegeta yelled and blasted all the Disney movies.

I stopped laughing, "YOU FUCKHEAD! THAT WAS OVER ONE HUNDRED BUCKS WORTH OF MOVIES!" I bunched my hands into fists. "YOU STUPID SHIT! I'LL BUST YOUR SWELLED HEAD IN!"

"Whoa… that sounded wrong…" Bana mumbled. Rogue's face changed to an expression of disgust.

"Shut up, ikeike." Vegeta muttered.

"They should do things for you to repay you." Rogue said with an evil glint in her eye. Bana chuckled with the same evilness.

"Yeah! We can do chores and stuff!" Kakarot grinned.

Piccolo's eyes narrowed. "I did nothing so I will do no 'chores'." He turned with that cape of his and walked back out into the backyard.

"Vegeta? Will you repay me for the tapes you destroyed?" I asked him.

He stood in silence for a moment, "As long as it is not outrageous." He growled finally.

"All righty then. Let me talk to my comrades!" I had to keep a tight hold on my need to rub my hands together and laugh evilly. Bana, Rogue and I retreated far enough that the Saiyans' acute hearing would not pick up anything we said.

"It needs to be good!" Rogue chuckled.

"Very, very good." Bana agreed.

"So good, that it will be forever enshrined in our memories." I elaborated and the others nodded solemnly. We then brainstormed on what would be a suitable 'punishment'.

"I've got it!" Bana hissed, glancing at Vegeta quickly, "We could get them to swimming with us in a pool of whipped cream!"

"Although I agree with that as a very memorable experience, we have to remember Vegeta would not do that as he would consider it outrageous." I reminded her. We all heaved a sigh and went back to thinking.

Rogue grinned suddenly and glanced outside. Her grin grew wider, "I've got it! They could wash your cars!"

"What's so good about that?" I was puzzled and Bana scratched her head in a confused gesture.

"They would get hot because it's so sunny so they would naturally want to take their shirts, and maybe even their pants off!" her evil grin looked to be contagious as it spread to both Bana and I as we envisioned Vegeta in black, silk, _wet_ boxers washing a car. "Of course, I won't really care about Kakarot. We'll have to give Vegeta the larger of the two cars so we would have more time to ogle him." Rogue added.

"Let's also see if they would give us massages!" Bana's grin was almost ear-to-ear.

"Sure!" we all turned and walked back toward the two Saiyans with the evil grins still stuck on our faces. I believe that they were somewhat unnerved by these grins as Kakarot shuffled his feet around and looked at the ground while Vegeta's face paled slightly.

"We would like you to wash our two cars." I said.

"That's all?" Kakarot asked incredulously.

"And give us massages." Bana said, watching Vegeta.

"I will not give anyone a massage!" Vegeta bellowed.

"Awh, damn…" Bana muttered.

"Fine, fine." I growled, "Just wash the damn cars."

We were extremely disappointed when we found out that Bana's car and my car were almost the same size. So we gave Vegeta Bana's car because it was slightly larger then my car which we assigned to Kakarot. I went over the basics of car washing with them and made sure they understood not to wash them super fast as they were "inexperienced at this type of thing and they might chip the paint". Which, AKA, meant "do not go fast as this is going to be one of our only chances to ogle the hottest guy in history ". Then, Bana, Rogue and I watched them wash the cars.

As Rogue had predicted, they soon got too hot in the blazing spring sun. Kakarot stripped off his shirt while Vegeta stripped off his shirt and pants, seemingly oblivious to our stares. "My Kami…" Bana whispered.

"Are those his?" Rogue asked incredulously.

"They can't be… They're so… so…" I began in a confused voice but I couldn't finish my sentence.

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Jeril: What kind of underwear is Vegeta wearing? Hehehehe… You're not gonna know until I update! You are at my mercy! *laughs maniacally* Hey peeps! I made a DBZ Fanatic test!! Go to this addy http://www.angelfire.com/realm/trewthsweyr/fanfic/tests/fanaticts.html, take it and tell me what you think (and got) on your review! If ya'll like it I might make some others.

Vegeta: I have read what she wrote about my under garments and I would like to take this opportunity to say this: MY UNDERWEAR IS NOTHING LIKE WHAT THIS SICK HENTAI THINKS!

Jeril: *sniffles* That's not nice, Vegeta. But, I agree. The underwear he wears in the next chap is just put there for humor purposes.

Kakarot: *stares at the two and then flies off muttering something about lunatics*


	24. Oh my Kami! Krillin's been kid, er, mann...

Jeril: You know what I forgot in the last chap? To give prizes to the people who guessed what Mike was gonna do! *digs around in her prize bag* Um. you people can have. the Goten and Chibi Trunks dolls! *hands out the prizes to DeathStorm, Frozen Phoenix, and Kakarrot-Lover* It's really spiffy! You say 'Fusion Ha!' and they turn into Gotenks! 

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"Gay?" Rogue offered.

"Yeah, that's the word I was looking for…" I mumbled.

We all stared at Vegeta completely bewildered by his choice of underwear but also happy because we were seeing him in it. When he noticed our stares he turned. "What?" he demanded.

"What is with your… your… underwear?" Bana finally asked.

"Oh, yes. Those." Vegeta looked kind of embarrassed. He was wearing not black silk boxers, not spandex underwear but some odd combination of the two. It was a lot like spandex biker shorts but they were tight… very tight. And wet. The really strange thing about them though, was that they were purple with blue hearts arranged on them in some random pattern. A large, bright, electric blue one was positioned right over _that_ area.

"Did you get those for yourself?" I asked, fearing the worst.

"No. I got them as a present on one of your baka holidays." Vegeta growled while turning and began to scrub the car furiously.

"If you don't like them, why do you wear them?" Bana asked, watching Vegeta scrub with a worried expression, "By the way, lay up on the car a little. You might dent it." While Vegeta had his back turned, Bana snapped a few pictures of him with the camera she had brought.

"Because the baka onna thinks they are 'cute'." Vegeta growled and complied with Bana's request.

"Who gave them to you?" Rogue finally asked.

"Vegeta! You're wearing them!" Kakarot grinned as he popped his head around the side of the car.

"Go away, bakayaro." Vegeta hissed.

"You gave those to him?" I asked Kakarot, my jaw dropping.

"Well, Chi-chi was the one who picked them out. She said they were sexy, whatever that means. She suggested I get them but when I said they didn't look comfortable she bought them as a present from me to Vegeta." Kakarot grinned the Son Grin™.

"Oh Kami…" I rubbed my face. _Maybe Kakarot is gay,_ I mused to myself then dismissed the notion. After all, if he was, he would have reacted differently to the yaoi fic.

"Okay, that's just queer." Bana muttered.

"Extremely queer." Rogue agreed.

"What does 'queer' mean?" Kakarot asked, "Is it a type of food?" his stomach growled loudly. Vegeta rushed and finished the car then hurriedly pulled his pants back on. Thankfully, he left his shirt off and we all were satisfied to ogle that part of him.

I checked my watch. "Bana, it's time to get the chibis. You want to do that?"

"Sure." Bana shrugged.

"Oh yeah," I pulled out my wallet and handed her four fifties, "stop by the grocery on the way back. You know what kinds of stuff to buy."

"Yep. I'll be back later then." Bana climbed into her now clean and shiny car and started it. She stuck her arm out of the window and waved as she drove off. I waved back.

"Is that it?" Vegeta asked.

"Well…" I was tempted to ask him to do something else involving whipped cream but I decided against it, "Yeah, you're free."

"I'm going to snack!" Kakarot made his way to the kitchen and Vegeta followed him.

"Rogue…" I turned to talk to her but she was gone. I scratched my head, "That's funny. She was just here a minute ago…" I shrugged and went to do laundry.

Rogue laughed evilly and watched her victim with a grin. He was sitting in the kitchen, watching the TV and snacking on some cookies. Rogue took out the duct tape and grinned. This was going to be oh so easy. She crept up behind him and before Krillin knew what had hit him, she had wrapped duct tape around his arms and torso. She then slapped a strip over his mouth and picked him up. "Oh, how I am going to enjoy doing this…" she chuckled.

As she was lugging him away, Goku and Vegeta walked in. Goku looked at them, "What're you doing, Rogue?" Krillin began thrashing around even harder and yelling incoherently at Goku.

"I'm just…" Rogue thought fast, "I'm playing a game with Krillin! Capture the criminal! I'm the police woman and Krillin's the robber!"

"Oh… but that duct tape looks like it'd hurt and…" Goku began but Vegeta cut in.

"Shut up, Kakarot! Don't ruin the girl's game!" Vegeta winked at Rogue and grinned. He knew that her intentions for Krillin were nothing friendly and so he approved. Rogue grinned back and dragged the screaming Krillin off.

"Are you sure they're playing a game, Vegeta? Krillin looked kind of scared to me…" Goku mused as he pawed through the refrigerator's contents.

"Come on, Kakarot! He was acting! Leave them to their game and help me clear out this fridge!" Vegeta growled and grabbed a bowl of fruit out. Goku looked at Vegeta suspiciously for a few moments but the nearby food was what made him finally decide. He grabbed a carton of milk and a bowl of fruit and the two Saiyans sat down on the counter to begin their feast… um, snack.

I picked up clothes off my little brother's floor. It was pretty nasty. He had half-eaten food spilled on the bed, dirty underwear hanging off the shelves and he had left his computer monitor on. I sighed and with the long stick I had brought, I began to pick up the clothes.

As I passed the monitor, I couldn't help but look at what was on it. There were two anime pictures. The first was of Piccolo singing 'I'm a Cucumber' and the other was of Piccolo giving an orientation of how Nameks are part amphibian and part plant. That second pic was a pet theory of my brother's and he always was trying to prove it. I sighed as a bad feeling crawled around in my stomach. _I hope Zar knows what he's doing…_ I prayed as I finished cleaning up his room.

I threw those clothes in the laundry room and then collected mine. After that, I walked to Vegeta's room. I opened it and stepped in. My parents' bedroom seemed to have a glow to it, one that I hadn't noticed before. I picked up Vegeta's clothes with a large grin on my face. I held my tousan's shirt up to my nose, the one Vegeta had worn the first day, and breathed in deeply. It smelled like Vegeta. "Now I know what heaven's like…" I muttered to myself as I brought the pile of clothes to the laundry room. I breathed in the smell one more time and then put the shirt in a large zip lock bag. "Now that, is staying on my dresser forever," I instructed myself as I walked down the hall and then placed it on my dresser in my room.

I walked into the pantry room, armed myself with a gas mask, a clothesbasket and a broom and then I entered hell. Now, I've been told that I bash Kakarot too much but I disagree! He deserves everything I say about him! His clothes were all shoved under the furniture and his underwear was draping off a lamp. I guessed Goten had been the one to put the underwear on the shelves in Zar's room. _And to think they live under the same roof with the harpy from hell,_ I thought as I picked up the clothes with the broom, _I almost pity her…_ I put them in the clothesbasket I had brought along which was rightly labeled 'Toxic Waste'.

I was dragging that down the hallway, being careful not to touch any of the contents, when I heard a giggling sound coming from my parents' office. I tiptoed over to the door and cracked it open. Inside, Rogue had Krillin duct taped to a metal chair and was standing by him, rubbing her hands together and cackling quite evilly.

_Oookay…_ I thought as I closed the door as silently as possible, _I hope that's not what it looks like. Well, of course it's not because she hates him. Right?_ I shook my head and walked back to the laundry room to sort out the clothes. I used a long pair of cooking prongs to separate the clothes. Then, I put the first load of shirts in and walked off to the kitchen to make Mike a snack. _The poor guy's prolly working really hard…_

"Muwhahahaha!" Rogue cackled evilly and grinned at her victim. She watched him cower in the chair in fear. "What shall we do with you, eh?" Rogue laughed to herself as she got out the honey and proceeded to pour it into Krillin's hair.

Kakarot and Vegeta were lying down on the dirty counters, sleeping. While I was making a sandwich, I sighed in disgust as I noticed a trickle of drool coming, not from Kakarot's mouth, but from Vegeta's! I finished making the sandwich, poured a soda and then brought them down to him. He was sitting at a worktable, hunched over and looking like he was concentrating really hard. I set down the tray as quietly as I could and then, as silently as I possibly could, I sneaked behind him to look over his shoulder. He was working on a little, computer chip board thingie. I grinned and breathed into his ear, "Boo…"

"OH MY FUCKING KAMI!" Mike fell out of his chair, throwing his instrument of work across the room. He lay there for a moment, collecting his thoughts, then he sat up and screamed at me, "JUST WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU THINK YOU WERE DOING?"

"Hey! Chill, Mike, and watch the language! You're putting too much pressure on yourself. You don't have to fix it." I said with a smile and helped him to his feet.

"Actually, you'd have to feed them for the rest of their _Saiyan_ lives if I didn't." Mike reminded me.

"Fix it now, Mike." I said in a mock-serious tone. He laughed and I brought the tray over to the worktable while he went to fetch his tool.

He picked up the sandwich as he sat down and took a bite. While he was chewing, he looked over the little computer chip thing. He stopped chewing suddenly and growled, "Bo, get over here." I complied. He held a magnifying glass over one part of the board. "Look through and tell me if you see a scratch." He ordered in a commanding voice.

I looked. "Wow, Mike is your vision really that good?"

"BO! YOU'VE SCRATCHED ONE OF THE MAIN SECTIONS! IT'S COMPLETELY RUINED!" Mike screamed.

"Calm down, Mike. Everything will be all right. It'll work out!" I said in a reassuring tone. Though, deep down inside, I wasn't quite sure about that…

The nine-year-old girl clinked the keys together and walked behind her brother dutifully. She hated going to the grocery store and the only reason she had come was that her brother had let her ride on the moped with him. She sighed and looked around. A boy with purple, no, lavender hair caught her eye. She watched him walk by with another boy about his age with black hair. They were pushing two shopping carts that a teenager was putting items in. "Trunks…" the girl whispered. She walked away from her brother and followed the two boys who she just knew were from DBZ.

When they checked out, she ran ahead of them and started her brother's moped. After they had loaded their two carts into the car, they drove off with the girl quickly pursuing them. As she followed them, the only thoughts in her mind were that of Trunks.

  
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Jeril: S'rac is my new muse!! He has the best ideas!! He gave me the Piccolo pics idea and the subplot about that sprung from his idea!! THANK YOU S'RAC! YOU'RE THE BEST! *coughs and voice changes to that of the DBZ announcer guy* What is Rogue going to do to Krillin? What is Zar doing with those two pics? (thanks to the person who mention the Cucumber one)

Vegeta: Will Bouke, Kami forbid, ever get over her loathing of Kakarot? *Jeril glares at Vegeta for stealing her line*

Kakarot: Will they be able to fix the piece Bouke broke? *Jeril glares at Kakarot*

Vegeta: Who is that girl who stowed away in Bana's car?

Kakarot: And most importantly, will they ever get home? *Jeril looks completely pissed off*

Vegeta: Tune in next time for the next exciting chapter of.

Kakarot and Vegeta: Another Boring Day. NOT!

Director: And cut! *pats Kakarot and Vegeta on the back. Vegeta shrugs the hand off* That was beautiful, guys! It brought tears to my eyes! No, seriously! It did!

Jeril: That's it! I quit! *throws off her 'Author' jacket and storms out of the studio*

Vegeta: Oh, shit. *hugs Schnookums and sucks on his thumb*

Kakarot: This can't be good. *hugs Sugar Lump*

Vegeta: *mutters around the thumb* We have to bring her back or there will be no more story and I have to know what happens to myself! *Kakarot nods and the two blast off to bring Jeril back*


	25. I am a cucumber? When did that happen?

"Kami! I'm completely fucked over! Vegeta is going to kill me for not fixing the device! Why me? WHY ME?" Mike yelled to the ceiling.

"Wait a damn moment and shut up…" I studied the computer chip closer, "Does that thing have data on it?"

"No, it's just a linking chip. Why do you ask?" Mike answered.

"Because I've seen something identical to it before!" I dashed up the stairs and into my brother's room. I pulled open his closet door and grabbed his see-through Advanced Gameboy™. I brought that downstairs to Mike.

"See!" I gasped and pointed to the linking chip that was visible under the covering.

"Kami… that's just weird…" Mike muttered and used a screwdriver to open the casing.

"Kami answered your prayers, Mike! You should be touched!" I said sarcastically.

He growled at me while he took out the chip and carefully replaced the scratched one. "Will your brother mind?" he asked me.

"Not really. He's already tired of that Legacy of Goku™ game." I answered and then muttered to myself, "At least, I hope he is…"

"Good, because this thing's trashed without that chip." Mike threw away the broken chip and the Advanced Gameboy. I winced. "Well, I have a lot to do, so if you don't mind…" Mike picked up his tool and looked at me expectantly.

"Okay, I can take a hint. Break a leg Mike, and try not to become mincemeat. Who could I tease if you were dead, eh?" I grinned and walked up the stairs. Mike watched me go before turning back to his work. I headed to the laundry room to put the wet clothes into the drier and put a new load into the washing machine.

Kakarot woke up to hear the car pulling into the driveway. He hurried outside to help the chibis bring in the groceries while Bana cleared the table and counters to make room for them. When she came across Vegeta, she managed to snap a few pictures, drool and all, before he woke up. He eyed her suspiciously before moving to a sitting position. He watched with a superior look as the others brought in the food.

"Yo, Vegeta. Move your sex… er, fat ass! I need to put the food down where you are sitting!" Bana growled at him as she stood holding up a heavy bag of canned goods. Vegeta watched Bana strain with the bulky bag for a few moments before he slide off the counter with a graceful motion and walked out of the kitchen.

Bana watched him go with a dreamy smile on her face. If she had been in an anime, there would have been hearts in her eyes. _Damn…_ she thought as she noticed a ripping sound idly, _If only I could get a slice of that ass. Bulma doesn't deserve him! If only…_

Then, the bag split. The cans fell from the open bag to hit her feet and the linoleum floor below. "OW, FUCK! SHIT! THAT HURTS, KAMI DAMN IT!" Bana screeched, dropping the bag to grab her injured foot.

"Zoning out, eh?" Zar teased.

Bana leapt over the cans at the boy, "COME BACK HERE, BRAT! YOU FUCKING COWARD! FACE DEATH WITH PRIDE, BOY!" she chased him through the dining room and into the living room where he tripped over a cord and landed face down. With a loud, triumphant "ha", Bana jumped on his back and pulled his arms behind his back and twisted them. "BEG, YOU BASTARD!" she yelled.

"KAMI! OH SHIT! GO TO HELL!" Zar howled back in pain.

"If I go to hell, I'm taking you with me, brat!" Bana hit a pressure point on Zar's arm.

"MERCY, DAAAAAAAAAAMN YOOOOU! MEEEERCY!" Zar screamed. Bana let go of his arms and stood back up. She dusted her hands off on her pants and sauntered off to the kitchen like nothing had happened.

Zar stayed lying down for a few moments before changing to kneel. He rubbed his sore arms and muttered, "I'm going to have a lot of bruises by tomorrow…"

"Pathetic weakling!" Vegeta snorted from where he had watched the incident. He turned and walked back to his room.

"Wh-what?" Zar stuttered. _Pathetic? Weakling? But I try to work out… I want to be strong like you, Vegeta-sama…_ Zar felt stingy tears beginning to form in his eyes. He furiously rubbed at them as he stood up. _I won't cry! I won't! If I cannot be strong, then I will be cunning! Now, what will my first evil plan be?_ His planning was stopped when the doorbell rang. Grumbling, Zar stomped to the door. A curious Piccolo followed him.

Zar opened the door to see a young girl standing on the porch. She had black hair that was pulled back into a ponytail and big blue eyes. She was wearing a black tank top, black sandals, blue jean shorts and she was fiddling with a blade of grass nervously. Zar felt his mouth hang open slightly. _I think I'm in love…_ "H-h-hi… can I h-help you?" _Damn! I sound like a complete baka! Great first impression, Zar!_

The girl kept her eyes fixed on the blade of grass in her hands, "Yes… well, I was wondering if someone was here…" She finally looked up and dropped the blade of grass, her eyes widening in shock. She lifted a shaking finger and pointed at Piccolo.

"Eh…" Zar scratched his head and tried to think of an excuse.

"Is that…" the girl thought for a moment as she stared at Piccolo. Then she squealed, "IT'S PICCOLO!"

"Er… yeah, it is." Zar grimaced. His sister was going to kill him for putting yet another DBZ obsessed fan in her hands.

Hearing the girl's shriek, Vegeta, Trunks and Goten arrived to see what was happening. The girl looked them over, "And Goten and Vegeta and…" her eyes got bigger. "TRUNKS!" she dashed forward and latched on to Trunks' arm.

"Ah! GET HER OFF ME!" Trunks yelled and tried to pry the girl off with hurting her. Goten also helped but nothing they could do would make her let go. _Damn…_ Zar thought, watching Trunks jealously.__

I heard the yelling and I ran to see what was the matter. I entered the entryway only to see a very odd sight. Trunks was floating a few feet off the ground, shaking his arm madly while Goten floated by him trying to pull a young girl off his arm. Piccolo was watching with a faintly amused expression, Kakarot was scratching his head with a confused expression, Zar and Bana had collapsed against the wall from laughter, and Vegeta looked slightly pissed. But then again, doesn't he always?

"Everyone stop!" I shouted. (A/N: Does Bouke seem bossy?) Goten and Trunks returned to the floor while Bana and Zar fought to control their laughter. "What happened?" I asked.

"Well, I answered the door and…" Zar started.

"She attacked me!" Trunks howled, trying to shake the girl off.

"Who're you?" I asked the girl.

"The name's Vicky! I would offer you my hand to shake but it's occupied at the moment!" Vicky winked at me and looked dreamily back at Trunks.

"Oh. Trunks fan, right?" I asked with a slight smile.

"Heck yeah!" Vicky grinned, "Have you seen Mirai's butt? Speaking of that, is he here?"

"No, sorry." Bana said.

"Darn…" Vicky muttered. While she was distracted, Trunks managed to rip out of her hold. He dashed off, followed closely by Goten. "Nooooooo! Come back, Trunks-chan!"  Vicky wailed, running after them.

"How many people do we have to cook for now?" I asked Bana downheartedly.

"Well…" she mentally added up the tally, "eleven. Well, technically twelve but Pickle doesn't eat much."

"Damn… I'M GOING TO BE BROKE!" I felt like crying at the moment.

"Where's Krillin?" Kakarot asked.

"Erm, well… Rogue has him in the office…" I muttered.

"What are they doing in there?" Bana asked.

"I… don't know… I think Rogue doesn't like him…" I bit my lip.

"Should we check?"

"But what if they are…" I couldn't finish the sentence.

"With Krillin?" Bana looked ill.

"I agree."

"Come on!" Zar ran down the hall to the office door. Bana and I shrugged and followed him. Vegeta, Kakarot and Piccolo followed us. Zar opened the door and we all stepped inside. In the office, hair and honey was spilled all over the floor and there was still a little duct tape left on the chair. 

"Where are they?" Bana asked.

"Search for their kis!" I suggested.

Kakarot nodded and closed his eyes and concentrated. "In the backyard." We headed out there and we very surprised by what we found.

Rogue had almost completely covered Krillin in duct tape and she had tied a rope around his feet and strung him up from a tree. She had even shaved off all his hair. She was grinning evilly at him and putting duct tape on his head when we arrived.

"Whoa… Ouch…" I muttered.

"That's got to hurt…" Bana agreed.

"Krillin!" Kakarot gaped at his tortured friend.

"Rogue… can you take him down please?" I asked.

"Just let me do one last thing!" before I could refuse Rogue ripped the duct tape off Krillin's head. Lucky for him, the short guy was already unconscious.

"Now _that_ has got to hurt like a motherfucker!" Zar announced.

"Zar! Watch your language!" I screeched as Rogue took Krillin down and Kakarot rushed over to help his friend.

"You should've heard him when I was beating the shit out of him." Bana chuckled.

"Awh, shut up, ya dumb bitches." Zar growled and then split.

"ZAR! GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE! I'M GOING TO BEAT YOUR TILL YOU CAN'T SIT DOWN FOR A MONTH, YOU LITTLE SHIT!" I screamed at his quickly retreating backside. I turned and glared at Bana who was laughing. "I'm going to fix dinner!" I snarled and stomped off toward the kitchen.

Zar looked around the corner and clutched the two pictures to his chest. _I sure hope this works…_ He watched Piccolo walk down the hall and towards him. _It's now or never…_ He stuck his head out of his room and hissed, "Hey Piccolo. Come here!"

Piccolo looked at Zar suspiciously but followed him into his room. Zar stood on his computer chair so he could be eye level with Piccolo. Zar took a deep breath and then said in a voice that obviously was meant to sound tough, "Okay, Pickle. Here's the deal." Zar took out the pictures and handed them to Piccolo, "You take me and the other kids to the zoo and I won't spread these around."

Piccolo's face twisted angrily. "What if I just destroy these?" he snarled.

"I got a million of them printed out and hidden around. You'd never find them all."

"Why do you need me to take you to this 'zoo'?"

"We need an adult escort or reishi'll kill me." Zar said.

"Oh. I see." Piccolo stared at the pictures good and hard. Then, he heaved a large sigh, "Okay… I'll do it."

"You will?" Zar's voice momentarily went back to his normal, childish tone. He coughed, "I meant, of course you will. I knew you'd see my way." Zar nodded and hopped off the chair. He scrambled out of the room to find the other chibis.

Piccolo watched him go and felt a smile tug at the corners of his mouth. The boy acted kind of like Gohan did at that age. Though Gohan wasn't so dirty minded. Piccolo looked back at the picture facing him. He said in a bemused tone, "I _am_ a cucumber?"

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Announcer Guy: Will Mike be able to fix the machine? Will Vicky ever catch Trunks? Will they have enough food for ele-er, twelve people? Will Bouke become broke? What will happen at the zoo? Find out in the next exciting chapter of *a scream is heard* what the hell?

Jeril: *is being dragged back by Vegeta and Kakarot* I don't want to be the Author anymore! You don't give me the respect that I deserve!

Vegeta: Shut up, ikeike!

Jeril: Okay… *sulks*

Kakarot: *sighs and rummages around in Jeril's fridge*

Jeril: Ahem, I realize in this chap, Rogue acted really scarily and Rogue, if I have offended you or made you mad, I would like to apologize deeply. It was all in good fun!


	26. It's a Dragonball Radar! Spiffy! GIMME!

I stuck two of the chickens in the oven and set the timer to go off when they were ready. I sighed. Six more of those to go and two turkeys. _Kami! Why couldn't I have a few other stoves!_ I walked to the laundry room to put the wet clothes in the dryer and then I began to do a load of jeans.

As I was shaking out a pair of pants, something fell from them. I picked up the device and turned it over. Then I recognized it, "Wow… a Dragonball Radar…" I thought for a moment, "Yo! Trunks!" I yelled out, sure that wherever he was hiding his Saiyan hearing would pick up my voice.

Sure enough, after a minute or two, he and Goten zipped into the laundry room, "You called?" Trunks asked.

"Yeah, I found this in your pocket," I showed him the radar.

"Oh yeah! I forgot I had that."

"I was wondering… if I could maybe keep it. You know, as a memento kind of thing. To remember you all by." I asked.

"Eh… well…" Trunks chewed over my question with his mental teeth while he chewed his lip with his physical ones.

"Trunks, gimme. I growled.

"Well… I dunno…" Trunks looked indesicive.

"GIMME THE RADAR! GIMME NOW!"

"Okay, OKAY! I guess my mom won't mind because you had to feed us and take care of us for a while!" Trunks backed a step away.

"Thanks Trunks! You don't know how much this means to me!" I gave the lavender-haired demi-Saiyan a hug.

Vicky walked in at that moment. She had obviously been following the demi-Saiyans. "AHHHH!" she screamed, "GET YOUR PAWS OFF MY TRUNKS-CHAN!"

"Whoa! I'm not trying to steal your Trunks!" I said, letting go of the demi-Saiyan who immediately flew as high as he could get in the room and clung to the ceiling, a crazed look in his eye. I backed away from Vicky who was brandishing a frying pan, "Hey! I'm a straight Vegetarian! Believe me, I only have a slight interest in Mirai. Besides, the Chibi's too young for me."

Vicky looked at me for a few more moments before nodding in agreement. "Okay, but if you hug him one more time…" she left the threat hanging and shook her frying pan at me.

"I get the point!" I busied myself with stroking the radar, "My precioussss… my precioussss… I won't let those nassssty demi-Saiyanssss near you, precioussss…" Goten gave me an odd look, "Samuel and Gollum," I explained, "two of my favorite twisted creatures."

"Help me!" Trunks wailed as Goten ran out of the room, leaving his friend to his inevitable fate. Vicky grinned up at her prey. Trunks looked around wildly and then noticed the door on the ceiling. He opened it and slid into the attic. While Vicky took her anger at loosing Trunks out on a nearby chair, I threw the chibi up a flashlight. He grinned his thanks and then quickly closed the door.

"I've lost him! I finally found my Trunks-chan and I lost him! I'm a disgrace to Trunks Fans everywhere!" Vicky wailed and bashed the hell out of the chair.

"Eh, Vicky," I said when she took a breath.

"What?" she snarled at me, prolly still thinking that I was after Trunks.

"He'll have to come down for dinner…" I left it hanging like she had. The meaning dawned on her and she grinned wickedly.

"You're a great, great person, what's your name again?"

"Bouke, but you can call my Bo." We shook hands.

"Well, I best be off! I have many, many things to plot!" Vicky skipped out of the room humming a happy sounding tune.

"Kids're getting stranger and stranger these days…" I muttered to myself as I put the jeans in the washer and started it up.

"I agree!" Bana said as she entered the room, "I mean, look at your little brother! He is one messed up child!"

"Can't argue with that." I answered and lifted myself up by the arms so I could sit on the dryer.

Goten peeked his head around the corner, "Where…" he obviously feared the worst for his friend.

"Attic," I pointed at the door. _I love playing both sides… It's so… so… diabolical!_ Goten grinned and flew up to knock on it.

"What's the password?" came Trunks' muffled voice.

Goten was baffled, "Password? Um… uh… please?"

"Good enough for now!" Trunks opened the door and Goten zipped in.

As Trunks began to close it, I said, "Hold up a moment, kid!" I dashed off to the pantry where I got three bags of chips and a large bottle of soda. I handed it up to the boys. "That should hold you until dinner, and in the meantime, make up a password or secret knock or something."

"Will do!" Goten ripped open the bag of chips and began munching while Trunks replaced the door.

"Demi-Saiyans…" I muttered and Bana chuckled.

"Yeah, they're harder to understand then normal Saiyans."

"Maybe it's the mix of two genetically different races. I wonder if it's easier for them to go insane." I mused.

"It's a good idea for a fic…" Bana said. I could almost imagine the gears beginning to turn in her mind.

"Don't steal! It's my idea!" I growled.

"Okay, okay! Calm down!" Bana shook her head, "You are _way_ too overprotective of your ideas and characters."

"Yeah, one time one of my friends insulted one of my characters and I didn't speak to him again for a few months." (A/N: Very, very true. It was hard but then I forgot why I was angry at him. -_- Kami, I'm such a baka)

"That's just plain odd."

"I know, but it's me and they learn to live with it."

"How many friends have you lost because of it?"

"A few," I shook my head at my own stupidity and wandered back to the kitchen to check on the chicken.

I put the first turkey in the oven and wiped my forehead on my sleeve. The kitchen was getting so hot and steamy from all the cooking that it felt like a sauna! I checked on the broccoli, then on the rice, then the mashed potatoes and the final thing was the corn, green beans and carrots. I sighed and opened the freezer. I smiled as the cold air blew out on me. _Thank Kami for fridges!_ I thought to myself as I took out an ice pack and put that on top of my head. Bana looked in the freezer for another one but she had to make do with a bag of corn.

"You look like an idiot." I commented.

"Well, if anyone else says that, I'll just beat the shit out of them." Bana said with a grin.

"Ooo, strong words but would you really?"

"Eh, depends on how big they are. If they're ye high," Bana held out her hand at her collarbone, "I'd take them on."

"Me too. Anyone taller then that is just… is just… er, too tall."

"I'd take on any of them!" Rogue announced from where she was camped out in front of the open refrigerator.

"Why don't you people just open the windows?" Zar asked as he walked through the kitchen.

"Eh…" if we had been in an anime we would have sweatdropped, "why don't you do that for us, gutei?"

"Why should I?" he answered.

"I'll tell you where the chibis are camped out," I offered.

"Okay!" Zar dashed off and opened all the windows in the living room and dining room.

"They're in the attic. Tell them dinner'll be ready in an hour." I said.

"Will do!" Zar ran off.

"Why're all the little kids in a hurry these days?" Bana asked.

"I dunno… It's just weird…" I climbed up onto the counter and stretched out on it.

"Yeah, rush, rush, rush. That's all they do! Run around or play video games!" Rogue answered. We talked more while waiting for the turkey to cook.

When it finished, Bana put in the next one while Rogue and I went and checked on how everything else was coming along. Krillin walked into the kitchen. He had bandages over most of his body and he was hobbling along as if every movement hurt like hell. He tilted his head upwards, "What smells so good?"

"How the bloody hell are you able to smell anything anyway, monk boy? You don't have a nose!" Rogue hissed.

Krillin paled and began to stumble backwards, "I-i-it's _you!"_

"How nice to now that I'm remembered fondly." Rogue grinned.

"Eh, is it just me or does Krillin appear traumatized?" Bana asked.

"Yeah, I don't think he's gonna recover from this anytime soon." I shook my head and watched the ex-monk with amusement.

"G-get away from me, y-you freak!" Krillin wailed and ran out of the kitchen.

Rogue chuckled, "Well, I'll sleep better knowing that I'm haunting his nightmares."

"Hmmmm, congratulations Rogue! You're the first person from our world to terrorize a DBZ character! You should win an award or something!" Bana grinned.

I looked at them both and sighed, "You both are insane…" They glared at me, "But! Hell! I am too! So, let's another destructive thing to Krillin!" Rogue threw back her head and laughed maniacally. Bana and I joined in.

Kakarot walked in and looked at us, "Am I interrupting something?" he asked.

"Let's say we target him too!" Bana's grin grew as she jerked a thumb in Kakarot's direction.

"Oiy! Nice one!" I turned an evil smirk on Kakarot. He did an about face and walked back out of the kitchen.

"I would suggest putting honey in Krillin's shampoo but he doesn't have hair anymore so let's do that to Goku!" Bana suggested.

"Yeah! And let's steal all their underwear!" I added. Bana and Rogue looked at me and backed away slightly, "We'll have to handle them with prongs seeing that they do grace the lower areas of the noseless wonder and the baka. Then, we dump 'em off somewhere where the bakas won't be able to find them for a looooong time."

"Okay!" Bana wiped some sweat off her forehead and made a relieved sound, "For a moment I thought you wanted to keep the underwear."

"No way! That's just disgusting!" I shuddered at the thought.

"Yeah! They prolly have, erg, stains on them!" Rogue added with a disgusted look.

"Okay! New topic!" I twitched, "I'm having really bad images of crusty underwear!"

"Yeah, me too! So, what fanfics are you guys working on?" Rogue asked.

"Well, I've just thought up an idea about a demi-Saiyan, prolly will end up being Vegeta's son, whose human and Saiyan blood don't mix right. So he'll go mad." I said.

"It'll have to be in the angst category then, as he'll probably end up killing friends and relatives, right?" Bana added.

"Of course! He'll kill just about everyone! He's gonna be insane!"

"Can he kill Krillin?" Rogue asked.

"Sure!" I grinned.

"Ooookay, do I want to know what you girls are planning?" Piccolo asked from where he stood.

"Oh! Hey Piccolo!" Rogue greeted the Namekian.

"You kind of sneak up on us there." Bana said.

"'I fear you underestimate the sneakiness, sir.'" I quoted the newest Adam Sandler movie, _Mr. Deeds._

"Are you planning to kill anyone?" Piccolo asked.

"Eh, not really. We're just figuring out the plot line of a new fic." I explained.

"Okay, I won't ask anymore. I'm taking your little brother and the other children to the 'zoo' tomorrow. What is a zoo?" Piccolo inquired.

"The zoo?" Bana choked.

"They'll hog-tie you and drag you off to an exhibit!" I said in alarm.

"How'd they get you to take them?" Rogue asked Piccolo.

"That's none of your business," Piccolo replied quickly and I remembered the pics on my brother's computer.

"Blackmail…" I said with a smirk and a chuckle. I shook my head and muttered, "Gutei does me proud."

"What's a zoo?" Piccolo growled.

"It's a menagerie of animals from all over the world. They're fun places but that's if you can keep track of the brats you're going with. Good luck." Bana explained.

"Yeah, break a leg." Rogue added.

"Literally!" I grinned. Piccolo looked at me with a scowl, "Just joshing you."

"Everything's finally done!" Bana said and heaved a large, theatrical sigh.

"I feel like I've sweated off fives pounds!" Rogue said and took a long drink out of a glass of water.

"You probably have!" Bana grabbed her drink and drained it.

"I sure hope those guys can appreciate all this work! I mean, we all slaved over this in a hot kitchen for four whole hours!" I agreed as I set the food down on our large table. We had also set up a card table for the chibis to eat at and we put a half of the chickens and turkeys on that. The big table was for the other half, the vegetables and the rolls.

"DINNER TIME!" Rogue bellowed. The trampling of feet was heard as the starving Saiyans and demi-Saiyans converged upon their defenseless meal. Krillin, Rogue, Bana, Zar and Vicky all quickly filled up their plates before the Saiyans ate everything. Vegeta entered with a little more grace then the others who just ran in and began eating.

"You know what?" I asked Mike as he walked in from his confinement in the garage.

"What?" he asked back as he began to pile his plate with food.

"Watching Kakarot eat could almost make the sight of food disagreeable to one's stomach."

"Bo…" Mike said and just shook his head. I took a leg of chicken and a large helping of mashed potatoes and sat down at my spot to eat.

"Why are you eating so little, ikeike?" Vegeta asked from where he sat across from me, "Are you on a diet or something?"

"No, I'm just not very hungry. Are you on a diet? You haven't touched a crumb." I replied, pointedly looking at his empty plate.

"No, I am not either. I just refuse to eat any of this shit," the Saiyan no Ouji answered.

"What?" I hissed. The table began to quiet down.

"Oh, no… now he's in for it." Zar whispered to Goten.

"It's shit. Probably is all burnt and spoiled."

"Actually, Vegeta. It's really, really-" Trunks shoved a roll in Kakarot's mouth to make him shut up.

"Are you insulting my cooking?" I growled.

"She's been trying to improve her cooking skills for over three years. She's very protective of her skill." Zar explained further.

"Oh, does the baka need me to spell it out for them? Yes, it appears so, ikeike." Vegeta smirked.

I stared at him, pondering what I should do. I came up with something pretty quick as Rogue was mouthing the key word at me: grease. I stood up, not taking my eyes off Vegeta. I circled around the table, still watching him and entered the kitchen. He turned around and watched me suspiciously. I picked up the can of the still slightly warm cooking grease and advanced on him.

"You know what, Vegeta?" I growled as I inched closer to him, "I'm sick and tired of taking crap from you. So, here's compliments from the chef!" by the time I was just about finished, I was right next to him.

Quick as a flash, I grabbed the back of his shirt and emptied the cooking grease into it. Then, I turned around and split ran as fast I could. I listened to him roar in anger as I ran. "Come back, you cowardly baka!" He was just about to run after me but Kakarot restrained him. _Vegeta: 1 Bouke: 1! Stupid baka insulted my food… I'm gonna get him back somehow…_

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: Wahoooooooooo!! Fanfiction's up, up, uuuuuuuup!!! Yeah!! *dances around crazily like the Drooling, Swooning, Shower-Loving, Carrot-Hating, Obsessed, Insane Vegeta Fan she is* Anywho, I worked on this while it was down so that it wouldn't take forever to write a new chap. And I made it extra long because I think you all deserved it… and I couldn't stop writing it. Almost 3000 words! YEAH! So… yeah… If any of you are wondering, Samuel is from Sword of Truth and Gollum is from Lord of the Rings (DUH!). Gollum's soooooo cool!!

Kakarot: I feel sooooooo sorry for Piccolo… Having to take those chibis to the zoo…

Jeril: Hey! Don't mention guilt! Guilt is not in my vocabulary.

And speaking of vocabulary: Note to 'Guess': I don't mean to be insulting or anything, I'm just trying to explain myself. I do have a larger vocabulary then the swear words used in this fic, but don't you agree that it gets your point across like a slap in the face if you throw in cuss words? I mean, would you take me seriously if I called someone primordial ooze that was created from a sludge from a being's nether orifice and they should crawl back into the barren, demon infested, magma filled cave where they were spawned? I mean, it sounds good for descriptions and poems but for dialogue? Saying "you fucking retard" gets a lot of people's attention way quicker. I thank you for letting me know that I do swear a lot in this fic, but my reasons is I'm trying to make the dialogue sound like something people would actually say. Read the dialogue out loud, I think it sounds like something that would actually make up a conversation. If I had a brainiac in it, he would probably say things like that but these people are average, maybe a little over, IQ. So they would use swear words to supplement what they were saying to get their point across. O.o;;; Whoa… that was _waaaaaaaay_ OOC for me… I've scared myself…

Vegeta: Shut up, ikeike. You're scaring everyone. *goes back to giving Shnookums a bubble-bath* Kakarot, pass me the comb.

Kakarot: Vegeta, you're scaring everyone. *passes Vegeta the backscratcher and then goes back to playing with Barbies*

Jeril: Why me?


	27. Anywho, good luck I hope she's coherent

Mike stretched and turned in his chair to pop his spine. He looked at the completed transport device in front of him. _It's finished. I did it! I'm as smart as Bulma Briefs! Mike sat there for a few minutes, exalting in his triumph._

Then, he stood and walked up the stairs. He felt full of energy, as if he had just eaten a senzu bean. Well, actually, he'd never eaten a senzu bean before so he didn't know what someone would feel like after eating one but he felt like he imagined someone would feel like. Mike walked into the kitchen where he found Goku raiding the fridge. "Didn't you just eat?" he asked the Saiyan.

"No way! We ate three hours ago!" Goku said and pulled a bag of chicken breasts out of the freezer.

"What?" Mike looked at the clock and sure enough, it was around eleven o'clock. "Hmmm, how the time flies. I guess we'll have to send them back in the morning…" Mike muttered to himself and then turned to look back at Goku, who was sticking the chicken breasts in the microwave. "Eh, Goku?"

"Yeah?" Goku watched the raw meat begin to warm up.

"You do know that nuking them won't cook them, right?"

"Yep! I'm too hungry to wait for them to cook."

"But… won't you get some kind of food poisoning or something?"

"Nope! Saiyans don't get stuff like that!" Goku grinned and took the now warmed meat out of the microwave and picked at piece up.

Before he could take a bite though, Mike ran out of the kitchen. _That's disgusting… Maybe I should become a vegetarian or something after all this... Mike poked his head in Bouke's room and saw Rogue and Bana sleeping. __That's odd. Where's Bo? He wandered around the house, looking for her but not calling her name out because he didn't want to wake the other sleepers. (A/N: How nice of him! I would just scream at whoever it was I was looking for to haul their ass over to me)_

He walked into the laundry room where he saw Vicky sprawled in a blanket on the floor, sleeping. "Odd…" he murmured to himself and was about to leave when he heard something.

"Psst! Mike! Up here!" Mike looked up and saw the attic door was open. Trunks' head was framed in it, "Mike! Could you get us some food? We're starving! We had to evacuate the table because of her!" he pointed at the sleeping girl.

"Where's Bo?" Mike asked.

"I'll tell you if you get us food!" Zar's voice answered him.

"Okay…" Mike heaved a sigh and wandered to the pantry where he grabbed two boxes of cereal, three bowls, three spoons, two gallons of milk and two bags of candy. He lugged all that back to the room where he handed them up one by one to the boys.

Zar stuck his head out of the attic. He looked funny with his hair hanging, "Thanks Mike! Now, you know the window at the end of the hall?"

"You mean the one with the black curtain that's always down?"

"Yeah, that one. The curtain should be up. If it's not, pull the string to lift it, crawl through the window and onto the roof, look around and you should find Bouke."

"Why didn't I know about this before?"

"She didn't figure out how to get up there until a few weeks ago."

"Oh, I see. Thanks, Zar!" Mike turned to leave.

"Wait!" Zar called, "Before you go up there, open up that little cabinet on the wall above the washing machine."

Mike did as he was told. "Whoa!" he stood and looked with amazement at all the different kinds of liquor held in the cabinet.

Zar studied the contents for a moment, "Good, you can close it."

Mike closed it,  "Why'd you want me to open it in the first place."

"I was seeing how much liq me 'n the guys could wipe without being noticed," Zar grinned when he saw the stricken look on Mike's face, "Nah, nah. I'm joshing ya, man. I was seeing if reishi had taken any. She has."

"How much?"

"I dunno, not a lot I think. Anywho, good luck. I hope she's coherent." Zar retreated back into the attic and the door slide closed. A few seconds later, Mike could hear the sound of music being played.

"Must have taken a portable stereo up there or something," Mike mumbled to himself and walked out of the room. He looked down the hall and sure enough, the curtain was lifted. He walked over to the window and crawled through. It was a tight squeeze, but he made it. He put his feet on the windowsill and hauled himself up a rope and onto the roof. There was Bouke, lying down on a blanket and looking up at the starry night sky and humming to herself. (A/N: Oh no… I'm starting to get the feeling… *hands shake* NOOOOO!! I WILL NOT GO MUSHY/ROMANTIC ON MY READERS!)

Mike couldn't help but smile at his long time friend. _It's just like her to retreat to a place like this… he walked awkwardly to her. He wasn't used to walking on roofs after all and it was at a tilt and slightly slippery._

"Bo?" he reached out a hand and touched her arm.

I felt something brush my arm, "HOLY SHIT!" I yelled and jumped. Through the top volume of my CD player, I heard a muffled yelp and I opened my eyes to see Mike toppling over. I ripped off m headphones, jumped to my feet and reached out to grab his failing hand as he slid toward the edge of the roof.

"Hold on Mike!" I pulled him back with all of my strength. He was jerked back and he crashed into me. We fell onto my blanket. I lay there for a moment, breathing heavily, with Mike on top of me. Then, I became aware of the fact he was on top of me with one knee between my legs.

"Gah!" Blushing furiously, I pushed him off of me. He landed next to me and stared up for a few moments. I grabbed my CD player and checked it to make sure it wasn't broken.

"You okay?" I asked him.

"Yeah, I hurt a little but other then that, I'm fine," he sat up and looked at me.

"Sup?" I looked around for my CD player.

"I just came to find you and tell you that I fixed the device."

"Shpiffy," I turned my CD player back on and hung the headphones around my neck so I could still hear the music but also talk to Mike.

"Yep, pretty nifty. What you listening to?"

"'Pull the tapeworm out of your ass, hey!' Oh, System of a Down. They kick ass!" I answered.

Mike gave me an odd look, "Yeah, sure, riiiiiiight…"

"Shut up." I glared at him mockingly.

"Hey, hey, hey! Pull the tapeworm out of _your ass!" He said to me with his cute little smile he had. __Wait a minute… did I just think Mike's smile was cute? Okay… the night air must be getting to me…_

He shook his head and looked around the roof and surrounding neighborhood, "Nice view."

"Ah, it's nothing special. A good place to brainstorm and to think but-"

"What is _this?" Mike held up an empty bottle and peered at the label._

"Uh… heh… that, yeah," I put a hand behind my head and smiled the Son Grin™, "It's not-"

"Vodka? 90 proof!" he picked up another bottle, "_Jack Daniels? Bo! You alcoholic!" Mike dropped the bottles and they clattered down the roof and into the gutter._

"Hey! I didn't drink that today! That was from last week! And I spread it out over the course of a few hours! The other was from the day before the vodka," he glared at me when he saw the other alcoholic beverage bottles littering the roof, " I'll clean up the mess! I swear!"

"I'm ashamed of you! Drinking underage! All the time it seems! And on a roof! What if you fall? What if someone sees you?"

"Well… fuck the world. Those are what ifs. They don't matter," I answered and lay back on my blanket.

"Bouke… one day you're going to get in major trouble…"

"Yeah, yeah. Until then though, I'm having fun!" I grinned but it melted under his glare. Our conversation dissolved into frosty, on his part, and embarrassed, on my part, silence that was only broken by the music, which I quickly turned off.

Finally, Mike pulled a square box out of his pocket, "Mind if I smoke?" he asked.

"Mike! Smoking is bad for…" I realized the point he was trying to get across to me as he lit up a cigarette.

"Ahhhhh…" he took a drag, "I love these. I don't smoke them often as it's bad for me but every other day doesn't hurt, right?"

"You bastard. Trying to guilt trip me… I won't work…" I muttered, not so sure if what I said was true. I picked up my half-empty beer bottle and I chugged the rest. I let the now empty bottle fall to the gutter and picked up another then popped the top off. Mike snorted at me and took another drag from his cigarette. "So… sup?"

"Nothing much… nothing much." Mike answered and we sat together, looking at the stars and indulging in our separate pleasures that would in the end harm us. "I feel sorry for Piccolo," Mike said, a slight smile creasing his face, "It's not his fault people think he's part plant."

"Hey! It'll be funny! Imagine when he comes back! He'll prolly be exhausted! Even if I was getting paid five hundred bucks, I'd never take the chibis out to anywhere without backup!" I chuckled as I finished my beer. Mike looked at me and shook his head. "What?" I asked.

"You… you're so… so… you. There's no other way to describe you."

"What about singular words?" I asked as I popped open another. I knew I shouldn't but I couldn't help myself.

"Words? Let me think for a moment…" Mike sat thoughtfully, smoking his cigarette. After a few moments, he cleared his throat and flicked the cigarette into the gutter, "Okay, here's a few that came to my mind-"

"That was quick." I remarked.

He gave me a look and began his list, "Smart, funny, insane, annoying-"

"Hey!" I glared at him.

"At times." Mike amended. I nodded my acceptance and he continued, "short-tempered, sarcastic, intelligent-"

"Ah, ah, ah! You're being repetitive!" 

"Shut up and let me continue…" he glared at me, "hyper, odd, and pretty." (A/N: Awh, hell! Here I go people! I'm cutting loose on the cheesiness! Get ready to GAG!)

"_Pretty?" I looked at Mike, "Have you been smoking more then cigs?"_

"I'm not joking, Bo. You're beautiful."

"Serious, you are? But… you've never told me I was pretty before…" I looked at Mike in a new light. Sure, he wasn't much of a looker but his brown eyes that were almost black they were so dark, could stare into your soul and make you stop in your tracks. His short, slightly curly dark brown hair fitted his face that perfectly. A face that nearly always had a smile on it, whether the smile was of sarcasm, joy or irony. He was a few inches taller then me but didn't have much in the way of the body department.

"That's because I've always thought platonic about you. You were never more then a friend… but now…" he leaned closer to me.

"Me either…" involuntarily, I found myself leaning towards him. The gap between us was rapidly closing. Six inches… five… four…

"You're eyes, their like emeralds… so beaut-"

"UHGG!" I gagged and pushed him away, "Cig breath! Bleh! Brush your teeth!"

"Hey! Your breath smells like beer! I hate beer!" Mike snarled.

"Yeah, well, I hate cig breath!" I growled.

"You bitch! I confess my three year crush on you and you complain about my breath!"

"Three years?" I looked at him.

"Yeah! Three whole years! And what do I get? Not a single kiss! Nothing but hugs! I-" I cut him off with a small kiss on the lips. He kind of sat in shock for a moment. Though, when he went to put his arms around me and deepen it, I pulled back.

"Nothing you say?" I picked up my CD player and stood. I looked around the roof and shook my head. The roof was moving around a little.

"Here Bo," Mike stood up and put an arm around my waist, "Let me help you to your room. You're a little tipsy."

"Okay…" he led me over to the edge and went down first. Then, he talked me through getting half way down the rope. He then grabbed my legs and placed my feet on the windowsill. He stood anxiously as I made my way into the house.

"You good?" he asked.

"Relatively."

"Let me help you to your room." He offered his arm like those gentlemen did on all those movies. I was touched. I always wanted a guy to do that. It was so sweet and gentlemanly. Like all the opening of doors, pulling out chairs, taking off their hats. Guys now a day didn't do it though. I went to take his hand… and fell against him.

"Whoa!" he grabbed my arms and looked at me, "You got balance?"

"Not really…" I looked around.

"Ooookay then…" he sighed and helped me down the hallway.

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Jeril: Another day gone by! Heh, I bet you thought they were gonna kiss, then you thought they weren't, and then they did. *laughs in delight at her inner genius* Anywho… were the A/Ns during it annoying? Please tell me if they were and I won't do it anymore. I don't drink IRL. I just got a description from a friend that has to write that part. What do y'all think about the Bouke/Mike thing? Is it because she's tipsy? Or is it something more? And will Vicky get her hands on Trunks? What's going to happen to Piccolo? I almost feel sorry for him…

Vegeta: I can't believe you put a little bit of romance in that chap… it made me gag…

Kakarot: I didn't think it was too bad.

Vegeta: No one asked for your opinion, third class baka.

Jeril: Tanx Kakarot. *glares at Veggie* Also, huggles to all you people out there that leave long reviews!! You know, four or five sentences at the least!! You people kick ASS!! I really, really, really love reviews like Rogue's, Dark-Angel's, Saiyan Princess TRF's and others because you guys let me know what you're thinking about my fic and sometimes you leave a drop of inspiration in there!!! KEEP UP YOUR ASS-KICKING WORK!! GO YOU GUYS!!!

Kakarot: Yeah! Keep those longish, informative reviews coming! 

Jeril: Congrats to Saiyan Princess TRF for being my 175th reviewer! You get a… *digs around in a box* framed pic, well, two pics of Vegeta and 17! They're signed too!

Vegeta: Remember, you owe me two chocolate cakes for signing that and forcing 17 to.

Jeril: Shut up, Veggie. A few questions to you peoples out there: Can anyone tell me if Androids can sense ki? Or, if they can't, can they learn how to? I know that they don't have a ki signature. Also, how many years older then Bra is Trunks? And how old was Vegeta when he first came to Earth? These A/Ns are just getting longer and longer and longer… Do any of you read to the end?

One last thing, I swear! If any of you are getting lost in the house (I know I am) I made a little map to show you the way! http://www.angelfire.com/realm/trewthsweyr/fanfic/house.jpg It's actually kinda based on my house… The garage is just the lower story and it's half work area, half storage. You people better be thankful! I stayed up till 1:30 am my time writing this fic! I have half of the next chap finished!


	28. Focus… feel happy, feel joyous, feel ent...

_I murmured in my sleep and turned over only to come in contact with something warm and living. I cracked open an eye and looked into Mike's peaceful, sleeping face. "AHHHHHHHHH!" I screamed and shoved him out of my bed. The still half-asleep teenager went flying across onto the floor._

_He sat up, rubbing his eyes, "Bo… why the hell did you do-"_

_"WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU DOING IN MY BED?" I yelled, breathing heavily._

_"Don't you remember? You were drunk and one thing led to another and-"_

_"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" I screamed. Kami, let me be sleeping! Let me be sleeping! Let me be-_

_I woke up and opened my eyes slowly. I turned off my alarm. "Thank Kami! It was just a nightmare!" I sighed to myself and sat up. I swung my feet off the bed and onto the cold floor. It reminded me of a line from a song. I began to sing as I walked to the kitchen to fix myself a snack, "I woke up in a dream today, to the cold of the static and put my cold feet on the floor. __Forgot all about yesterday, remembering I'm pretending to be where I'm not anymore." I began to fix myself a sandwich as I hummed the rest of the song today._

_"Bouke…" Vegeta's voice came from behind me. I turned and, in surprise, dropped the knife I was holding. Vegeta was standing in the kitchen in just a towel. He began to remove it slowly._

_"Damn… I must be dreaming…" I muttered to myself as the scene began to get better and better._

My eyes flew open to the sound of my alarm going off. I hit the 'off' button and looked around my room carefully._ It might still be the dream within a dream thing_, I warned myself. Everything looked normal… I stood up and stepped over Rogue and Bana. They hadn't been there in my two dreams. I walked into the kitchen and looked around carefully.

"It must be reality…" I mumbled to myself as I poured cereal into a bowl. I filled it with milk and then put away the milk. I walked over to the table where I dug into my food with vigor.

"Ikeike! Fix me breakfast!" Vegeta growled as he stomped into the dining room.

"Fix your own, fuck head…" I mumbled around my cereal. I had gotten little sleep the night before and I didn't feel like making polite conversation.

Zar then bounced in, hyper and refreshed from his sleep in the attic. He was followed by the other two boys, "Reishi! Can you make us breakfast?"

"Make your own, scum sucker…" I muttered and then laid my head beside my empty bowl. I was feeling a slight hangover.

"You should've drunken a pint of water before you went to sleep!" Zar offered, "The hangover is caused by dehydration of the brain and drinking water keeps your brain hydrated until the morning." I glared at him. He made a little squeaking sound and busied himself with fixing his and the demi-Saiyans breakfast.

"Who will make my breakfast?" Vegeta asked me.

"Why do I care?" I answered, closing my eyes and wishing I were up on the roof.

"What's for breakfast?" the ever-cheerful Kakarot asked as he waltzed in.

"And I guess your sleep was satisfying and refreshing!" I snarled, hoping they would just all go away.

"I love your couch! It's so comfy! Can I have it?" Kakarot asked.

"No."

"Oh… can I have the leather chair?"

"No."

"Can I have both?"

"No!" I slid under the table and curled into a ball.

"Can I have the house?" Kakarot leaned over and poked his head under the table.

"Go away…" he shrugged and walked over to the kitchen to get something to munch on. _Focus… feel happy, feel joyous, feel enthusiastic, feel- KAMI DAMN IT! Who am I kidding?_ I groaned, letting Kami, and everyone else present, know how horrible I was feeling.

"Is she okay?" Goten chirped.

"Yeah, she'll recover in a few more minutes. Just wait." Zar replied and handed the chibis a box of cereal and a gallon of milk each, "It'll hold you until someone else fixes breakfast." He explained and dug into his bowl of 'Lucky Charms'. I watched his feet swing around under the table, hoping they wouldn't clobber me.

"When're we leaving for the zoo?" Goten asked.

"I dunno, whenever Piccolo-sama decides to take us. Early afternoon, I reckon." Zar answered.

"What's at the zoo?" Trunks inquired.

"Tigers, komodo dragons, otters, pygmy marmosets and other really, really cool animals!" Zar said happily.

"I'm going back to bed!" I called out as I crawled out from under the table. I stood and staggered out of the dining room, through the kitchen, down the hall and into my room where Bana and Rogue were stirring.

"What ate you?" Bana asked.

"And then threw you up." Rogue added.

"Nothing! Everything! Never mind!" I slid into bed and pulled the covers over my head.

"Drinking?" Rogue asked.

"You noticed?"

"Well, you're acting funny and also, you smell like beer."

"I thought that was her BO." Bana said amused.

"We'll leave you to recover then," I heard them leave and I sighed in relief.

Just as I was drifting off to sleep, I felt something hit the bed next to me. I peeled the covers off my face and looked at Mike. It took a few seconds to sink in and when it did, I shoved him off my bed quickly. "WHAT THE HELL?" I bellowed.

"What?" Mike rubbed his sore ass, "What'd I do?"

"YOU DON'T JUMP INTO BED WITH PEOPLE, ESPECIALLY GIRLS, AND EXPECT THEM TO WELCOME YOU WITH ARMS WIDE OPEN!" I screamed.

"I was hoping for legs but arms would do!" Mike replied cheekily.

"SHUT UP!" I pulled the covers back over my head and curled into a tight ball, "Go away, Mike. I'm tired."

"We have to send them back."

"Why? I still haven't gotten my pics of Vegeta!" I growled and sat up, removing the covers from my face.

"Well… some things are more important then naked pictures of an anime character. I mean, think about Trunks and Goten. They prolly miss their mothers a lot."

"Actually, I think they're enjoying this. It's an adventure for them, Mike. Let 'em stay a few more days."

"No, we have to send them back today."

"Okay, okay…" I sighed, "I guess Zar won't get his trip to the zoo."

"He's gonna be pissed."

"I know," I slid out of bed, "Let me get dressed and stuff and then we can ship them off."

"Okay…" Mike hesitated a moment before leaving the room. I grabbed some clothes out of my drawer and shuffled down the hall to the bathroom. Just as I was closing the door, Bana knocked it open.

"Hurry!" she hissed and dashed down the hall. I scratched my head and followed her. She and Rogue had already snuck into where Vegeta was staying. I quietly followed them and we all gawked at Vegeta as he took a shower. Bana snapped a few photos, always waiting till Vegeta was in the right spot or pose before hitting the button.

When he turned off the shower, we all rushed out. Bana clutched the camera in a death grip. I sighed, "I've fulfilled my life's goal. Kami, I'm ready to die now." I said with a smile. _Hah! I got my pics! Bouke: 2!_

"Ohhhh no you don't!" Rogue growled, "We still have to ruin Goku and Krillin's lives!"

"Aye! Don't die on us just yet!" Bana grinned maniacally.

"I'm going in the shower before Kakarot so I'll pour honey into the shampoo bottle." I agreed.

"Good! Now go forth and do evil unto others!" Rogue said and chuckled. I nodded and hurried back to the bathroom to take my shower and sabotage the shampoo. Bana went to the kitchen to get the honey. I waited by the bathroom door until she returned with it. I grinned in thanks and then entered the bathroom.

After I had cleaned myself and done my sabotage, I walked out of the bathroom feeling wonderfully refreshed and clearheaded. I went into the kitchen where Bana, Rogue and Mike were making waffles and pancakes. I stopped at the entrance to the kitchen and thought for a moment. Something was nagging at my mind… School! I was clear but Zar wasn't!

I walked over to the phone and dialed up his school. The secretary answered. "Hi! This is Bouke Enda. I'm calling in for-"

"Please hold," the secretary said snobbishly with a snap of her gum and I heard the elevator music begin to play. I muttered some very nasty things about secretaries and their habits. "What was that?" the secretary asked. She had gotten on and through my mutterings I hadn't noticed the absence of the music.

"Ah… nothing! Ahem, I was calling in about my little brother, Zaretu, being sick."

"Oh… that little…" she coughed, "Well, I'll send a note to his teacher. Thank you for notifying us. _Click._"

"Bitch…" I muttered and hung up the phone. I made my way to the living room where I pushed Kakarot's clothes off the couch and then lay down. I took a deep breath and smelled something nice. I took another deeper breath and tried to identify the scent. _Mmmm… smells so yummy… it's smells like… like… KAKAROT! _I jumped off the couch and looked at my shaking hands._ What's wrong with me? I _liked_ the smell of Kakarot! I must be going crazy!_

I sat down on the leather chair and closed my eyes. _I won't like the smell of Kakarot… I am a Vegetarian… Vegetarian… no carrots, just vegetables… but aren't carrots vegetables? So that would mean Goku is oka… I JUST THOUGHT OF HIM AS GOKU! I _AM_ GOING NUTS!_

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Jeril: That first dream was weeeeird… But the second one was nice!! *grins and chuckles evilly* Awh! They're sending them home! Piccolo's not gonna go to the zoo with the gakis! And I was looking forward to writing about that… *sniffles* Is Bouke going nuts? O.o;;; I know she's scared me…

Vegeta: How can she like the smell of that baka! She's one of my fans! The Saiyan no Ouji's! Not some third class baka's!

Kakarot: She likes my smell? *Kakarot looks scared*

Jeril: That was awesome how that Linkin Park song fitted in perfectly! *dances around* Happy, happy, happy, happy… *keeps dancing and chanting*

Kakarot: *to Vegeta* What was the number of that asylum again?

Jeril: I'm sooooooo happy! I got a baseball cap with the Majin "M" on the front and it's black with silver. It's awesome! I also got four DBZ t-shirts!! One has Vegeta on it, one has Mirai Trunks, one has both of them, and the last had Vegeta and Kakarot.

Vegeta: Kakarot, dial up the asylum now. 1-800-Y-O-U-R-M-A-D! She's gone beyond the level of obsessed and into the realm of 'psychotic fanatic'!

Jeril: *as Kakarot talks to the people at the Fanfic Authors Asylum, Jeril babbles on* Oh, yeah! Another thing, I was going to try to stay awake for as long as I can, but then I got a sore throat. So, I'm prolly going to be updating a lot as all I will be doing is sleeping and  'resting' in front of my computer. *grin* My friend stayed up once for at the least 56 hours and he hallucinated! I'm going to try and beat his 'record' when I'm not sick anymore. *laughs as the men in white drive up. Jeril notices them* NOOOOO! I'M NOT GOING BACK!! *goes Super Saiyan and fires a few ki blasts at the men in white*

Vegeta: Help me, Kakarot! *grabs one of her arms, Kakarot grabs the other. The men in white grab her legs*

Jeril: *struggling* NOOOOOOO!! Help me! Don't let them take me back! I can't stand it! The room service's horrible and the food's worse! *is being stuffed into the van* Not to mention all the nurses are as bad as Master Ro- *the door slams shut and the van drives off*


	29. I wonder if this could be construed as c...

I grabbed a pillow from the floor and smashed it against my face. I let loose a scream of horror into it. Rogue was walking through the living room when she saw me gasping and screaming into the pillow. She ran over, "Yo, what's up? What's wrong?"

I peeled the pillow away from my face, "I… I… I sat down on the couch… and I smelled this really good smell… like lemons kind of… and… and…" (A/N: Lemony smell, eh? Hehehe…)

"Annnnnd?"

"It's Kakarot's smell! I liked Kakarot's smell! I'm a disgrace to Vegetarians everywhere!" I wailed. Rogue looked at me for a moment and then burst into laughter. "Hey! It's not funny!" I growled as she collapsed on the couch.

"Oh yes it is!" she howled, alternating between gasping for breath and laughing. I glared at her as she recovered from the laugh attack. Why couldn't she see the distress this caused me? _Well… actually… if something like this happened to Bana or Rogue I'd be laughing… it _is _kind of funny…_

The rest of the group wandered into the living room over the course of the next few minutes as Mike had told them he needed to make an announcement. Bana, Rogue and I occupied the couch and when Mike made his way to sit on the TV, we all shot a collective glare at him. _Baka… he didn't have to fix the transporter…_

"Can I have your attention please?" Mike asked. Everyone quieted down except Kakarot, who was feeling his sticky hair and groaning something about Chichi and a frying pan. I chuckled in delight.

"I am proud to announce," he said, holding up the device, "that I have fixed it!" Kakarot and Krillin whooped in joy, Vegeta's face got a slight smile to it and Piccolo looked impassive as always. The chibis groaned though.

"We wanted to go to the zoo!" Trunks complained.

"Yeah! Zar said he knows a way to the staff's lock-" Zar slapped a hand over Goten's mouth. I gave my brother a suspicious look. He grinned back at me.

"Well, I'm sorry Goten, but we have to get home as soon as we possibly can. Chichi's probably worried sick." Kakarot said to his son. Trunks looked with hope to his father but he was disappointed when his father shook his head.

"Let's go!" Krillin reached for the device but Mike held it back.

"No! It hasn't been tested yet! Remember, I had to rebuild this, so it… might not… work…" Mike looked apprehensively at Vegeta.

"It better work, gaki, or else…" Vegeta growled the threat out menacingly.

Mike paled and licked his lips. "Well, we need to test it out on something… preferably living…"

"We could," I coughed, "_borrow_ one of the neighbor's mice."

"Too small, has to be about twice that size at least." Mike answered. (A/N: Guess right now what they're going to use!! See if you get it right!!)

"Hmmmm…" everyone got a thoughtful look and I glanced around. My eyes rested on something on a desk.

"Ohhhhh Zaaar?" I said in a sweet, singsong voice.

He looked at me fearfully, "Wh-what?"

"Just how attached are you to your guinea pig?" I asked.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" my gutei screamed as Mike duct taped the device to the guinea pig's fur. Zar started kicking and punching me, "YOU BITCH! NOT HAMPS! ANYTHING BUT HAMPS!"

"Come on, ouch, Zar! Ow! Just how, shit, attached to the DAMN thing, can you be?" I snarled, every few words adding in an expletive as he hit me.

"VERY ATTACHED!" Zar screamed as Kakarot grabbed his arms to restrain him.

"Watch out for his teeth!" I yelled, but too late. Zar had bit Kakarot's hand.

"YOU LITTLE!" Kakarot momentarily lost control and he hit Zar on the head. My brother crumpled to the floor, unconscious.

I stared at Kakarot for a moment, amazed. "Wow, Kakarot. You lost your temper…" Bana and Rogue also looked at Kakarot in a look of wonderment, tinged slightly with respect.

Kakarot put a hand behind his head and grinned, "Sorry."

"It's okay," I grinned, "It'll make this easier without his screaming."

"He's ready to go!" Mike announced and we looked at the guinea pig. The little beast had the device taped to it's back and a note taped onto that. The note said to send back the guinea pig, or what was left of it, so they would know if it was safe or not to send people through. "I've set it for a five second delay so I will have a moment to get away from it." Mike explained as he put the rodent on the floor.

"I wonder if this could be construed as cruelty to animals…" Bana mused.

"Believe me," I said to her, "the little bastard deserves it." She and Rogue chuckled.

"Back away!" Mike hollered as he hit the button. Everyone quickly cleared the immediate area around the guinea pig. It looked around in confusion and then disappeared.

"Yes!" Krillin jumped in the air and pumped his fist. Kakarot whooped. Goten and Trunks did a few cartwheels around the room, momentarily forgetting that they weren't going to the zoo now.

"It worked!" Mike grinned and grabbed me in a hug as I jumped up from the couch.

Bana snickered as Mike let go of me, "Get a room!" I mock glared at her and sat back down… only to find that Mike had beat me to my seat. I leaned back against him.

"Soooo…" Rogue said, trying to get everyone's attention away from Mike and I, "What're when gonna do while we wait for the pig to return?"

"We can play Monopoly!" I grinned and stood up. I dashed off to the closet in my room where the game was secured. I brought it back and set up the board. Goten and Trunks switched on the television to watch the anime that was playing on Cartoon Network. I glanced over and saw them staring at the Sailor Scouts. I rolled my eyes. _Boys…_

Bulma sat in a chair in her lab, waiting for the arrival of her mate, child and friends. _Men,_ she thought, _always arriving late._ She heaved a sigh and sipped at her coffee. It had only been an hour since Piccolo and Krillin had left but to Bulma it felt like a week. Bulma turned in her chair to stare at the metal square that was the receiver of the transport device as she lit up a cigarette.

Then, a little, furry rodent appeared on it. Bulma sat up straight and stared at the rodent for a few moments. She then put her coffee down on the desk and stood. Slowly, she approached the little creature, which had the device taped to its back. There was also a note also taped on it. Bulma pulled the note off the device and read it.

_"Hey Bulma! The device was busted but one of us over here in this dimension was able to fix it! Can you send the pig back through so we know it's safe to send Vegeta, Krillin, Trunks and the rest through? Thanks!"_

Bulma blinked and read the note over. She set the device to transport it back to where it came from, or within a five-foot radius, and then set the timer for five seconds. She hit the button and backed off the plate. The pig looked around and disappeared from her view.

I sighed as Kakarot rolled another snake eyes for the eighth time that game. Mike handed him another 500-dollar bill. "I love this game!" Kakarot grinned and passed 'Go'. Mike handed him 200 dollars.

"Give me the dice, Kakarot!" Vegeta grabbed the dice and shook them for a moment. He rolled and then glared at them as they stopped moving. 3 and 2, he counted the spaces and growled as he realized he was going to jail again for the fifth time that game. "THIS GAME HAS NO POINT!" he screamed as the vein popped on his forehead.

"Dad! Dad! Look! You're on TV!" Trunks called out, pointing at the television where it was the episode where Vegeta blew himself up when he was up against Buu.

I wiped a tear from my eye, "This episode is so sad!"

"I know!" Bana sniffled, "It always makes me cry!"

"Where are the tissues?" Rogue yelled. Goten handed them to her and we all reached for one.

"Don't die Veggie!" I yelled at the television, forgetting he was in the room.

"Eh… Bo?" Mike nudged me with an elbow.

"EXCUSE ME!" I yelled, looking at him, "I'M WATCHING THE CUTEST SAIYAN EVER TO BE BOR…" I noticed Vegeta looking at all of us oddly, "Eh heh…" I put my hand behind my head, "Whose turn is it?"

"Mine!" Mike turned back to the board to grab the device. He paused. "Oh my Kami…"

"What?" I asked looking at the playing board while Mike ran to the bathroom where sounds of puking could then be heard. I gagged and closed my eyes.

"HOLY SHIT!" Bana screamed and started gagging.

"AWESOME!" Rogue grinned.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*Vegeta reads off a letter from Jeril* 'Muwhahaha!! Poor, poor Hamps! He's been turned into a guinea pig guinea pig! What's on the board? *lol* supersayenprincess: I'm sorry but I don't know the answer to that. BananaGirl! When I read your review over the second time, I had a mental image of Vegeta as mashed potatoes… and it was very scary… O.o;;; I think there's a really good reason they've locked me up in this padded cell…'

Vegeta: Mashed potatoes? Me? *Kakarot laughs his head off. Laughing drifts off and is replaced by uneasy silence*

Kakarot: You thinking what I'm thinking Vegeta?

Vegeta: Probably… these author notes just aren't the same without the ikeike.

Kakarot: Yeah… they're lacking something… the author… *brightens* We should go rescue her!

Vegeta: But the guards are more powerful then we are…

Kakarot: Not if we fuse into Gogeta! *Vegeta nods and they do the Fusion Dance*

Vegeta and Kakarot: FUSION HA! *Gogeta sets off to rescue Jeril amid cheering from the reviewers*


	30. Your brother screams like a girl

A/N: Ahem, if you can't take semi-gory stuff…. Well, this chap's not for you and, what the hell are you doing in the DBZ section? Nah, I'm joking. Back to the point: if you can't take blood and stuff, I suggest you steel yourself and read or else, skip half of it.

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"What is that thing?" I asked queasily.

"I think it's that creature you call-" Rogue started.

"Hamps?" Zar sat up from where he had been recovering from Kakarot knocking his head, "Where's my-" he saw the thing that was lying on the playing board. He let loose a scream and he fainted.

"Your brother screams like a girl," Vegeta observed.

"Yeah… it's sad, really…" I sighed.

"This is so cool!" Rogue grinned, pointing at the bloody thing, "There's the heart, the bladder, the stomach and the intestines…" she looked up at me, "You guinea pig's been turned inside out!"

"Ouch! That had to hurt!" Bana remarked.

"Well, gentlemen? Do you still want to go home this way?" I asked the anime characters. They all shook their heads vigorously. "That's what I thought."

"Is that…" Mike asked as he came back into the room.

"Yes, it is." I answered.

"Man! You are _such_ a wimp!" Bana said and shook her head.

"I'm sorry! I just can't stand sick stuff. It comes from the time in biology class when one of the other guys dumped rat guts on my head." Mike shuddered, "I can still feel it sliding down the side of my face if I think hard enough."

"I think it's safe to say your brother is scarred for life…" Bana muttered to me as Zar stirred.

"Yeah… I almost feel sorry for the brat…" I mumbled back.

Zar recovered quickly. "Reishi! You just had to use Hamps, didn't you?" he was making sure to avert his eyes from the mutilated rodent.

"Yes."

"I agree with your brother!" Rogue spoke up. I quirked an eyebrow at her and she grinned, "We should've used Krillin! He's larger then a mouse," she looked at him and then added, "though not by much."

"HEY!" Krillin yelled, "That's not nice!"

"Why Krillin!" Rogue said in a sarcastically surprised tone, "What ever gave you the idea that I could be nice?"

"People, break it up." I said, "We have more important things to talk about."

"Yes, like how we are supposed to get home!" Vegeta snarled.

"I'm working on that one!" I growled back.

"If this stupid gaki had fixed the device right we'd-"

"Actually, Vegeta," Mike cut in, "I believe the device was fixed. If you look closely at the deceased rodent, you will observe that it's…" he liked his lips, "_condition_ is undisturbed. There is no sign of tampering with it. So, I believe that the device worked when it was sent to your dimension and when you mate sent it back, she broke it."

"Are you accusing my mate of being the one responsible for the malfunction of the device?" Vegeta said in a low, dangerous, deadly voice.

"Well…" Mike paled, "it depends on how you look at it…"

"Are you?"

"Eh… well… technically… yes…" Mike backed away a few steps as Vegeta lunged for his throat.

"KISAMA! DIE!" Vegeta held Mike up by the throat and strangled him.

"VEGETA! DROP HIM! HE STILL MIGHT BE ABLE TO FIX IT!" I screamed.

"Could you?" Vegeta asked Mike, shaking him. Mike grimaced slightly and pulled at Vegeta's hands. Vegeta slightly loosened his grip and Mike's face began to slowly return to its normal color.

"I might… it depends…" Mike gasped.

"EVERYTHING DEPENDS WITH YOU!" Vegeta roared.

"OKAY! OKAY! I CAN PROBABLY DO IT!" Mike screamed.

"That's better," Vegeta dropped Mike and stalked back to his room.

I rushed over to Mike, "You okay?" I helped him stand.

"Yeah…" he rubbed his sore neck, "I don't think any permanent damage has been done."

"Good." I grinned at him and gave him a hug.

"Mike," Rogue said, "You need me to get the thing out of the pig?"

"Yeah, that'd be nice of you. I know I'm not gonna do it!" Mike said with a weak smile.

"Hey! Now that we're not going home, Piccolo can take us to the zoo!" Goten said with a huge grin.

"YEAH!" Trunks jumped up into the air and then stayed up as he noticed Vicky waiting behind him with a net. I blinked. _Where the hell did she find that net?_ Trunks held up a hand and prepared a ki blast in it, "Don't. Try. Anything." He hissed.

"Oh, come on Trunks-chan! I know that you'd never hurt an innocent girl like me!" Vicky said, batting her eyelashes. Trunks looked around for an exit but there was none to be found. He heaved a large sigh and resignedly floated down onto the couch. Vicky pounced on him and enveloped him with the glomp of the century.

I heard some nasty squishing and ripping sounds and I turned around to see Rogue opening up the inside out guinea pig on a plate, "This is so cool!" Rogue exclaimed.

"Can I see the heart?" I asked, momentarily coming over my disgust at the mangled mammal.

"Sure!" Rogue handed me the rodent's heart. I held it between my thumb and forefinger and gently massaged it. It started beating again. "Awesome!"

"Yeah, my tousan showed me that trick a long time ago." I put the heart down and went to wash off my hands.

When I was in the bathroom washing my hands, Mike brought in the device. He started to carefully rinse the blood off the device while I dried my hands. I wandered back into the living room where Zar had recovered and had started up the video games. I flopped down on the couch and checked the clock. _It's only ten?_ My mind said tiredly, _it can't be! _

"Zar? When you want to go to the zoo?" I asked him.

"Eh… about we leave after lunch," Zar suggested.

"Sounds good to me." I rubbed my temples and then made room for Mike. He sat by me and, with a screwdriver he had brought, removed the cover of the device.

"Hmmm…" he poked around in the device, "what made it malfunction?"

I looked over into the device, "Hey… check this out." I pointed to a little wire that was melted.

"I wonder how that happened…" Mike mused to himself and gently prodded the wire.

*Flashback*

As Bulma read the note for the second time, a little bit of very hot ash fell from her cigarette and onto the device. It slipped through a crack in the device and melted a very thin wire.

*End Flashback*

As Mike prodded the busted wire, sparks flew from it. A few hit Mike's hands and he reflexively threw the device away. It sailed across the room and landed on the carpet where it continued to sputter sparks. Everyone backed away from the device as to not get burnt. The sparks that now numbered among the thousands, all drifted up in a spiraling cyclone that twisted and turned above the device. I lifted an arm to shield my eyes and saw the others do the same. 

"What's happening?" Kakarot yelled as a roaring sound filled the room.

"I don't know!" Mike yelled back.

"I hope the sparks don't catch the house on fire or something…" I mumbled to myself, my words lost in the howling wind.

As the roaring grew louder, and the sparks grew brighter, a figure was seen standing in the center of the cyclone. They seemed to look around in a confused way and then they seemed to notice the sparking device between their feet. With one booted foot, they crushed the device.

The sparks faded and the wind died down and soon the only thing different in the room was the new person. I blinked, the afterimage of the cyclone imprinted on my retinas. I peered at the figure for a moment and then recognized him.

"Oh, Kami… not another one…" I whispered despairingly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Gogeta: *arrives at the asylum* Where is Jeril? *is assaulted by hundreds of men in white, blasts them all to hell* JERRRRRRIL?

Jeril: *hits the door repeatedly* Gogeta! I'm in HERE!

Gogeta: *finds the cell, blasts it open and grabs Jeril, throwing her over his shoulder* Back to the bunker!

Jeril: Wait! My laptop! *Gogeta grabs the laptop and then flies off*

Jeril: *as Gogeta flies* Oiy! I'm slung over one of the hottest anime character's shoulder! I feel sooooo special! *Gogeta lands and drops Jeril and her laptop unceremoniously in the dirt* Hey! What was that for? *Gogeta defuses*

Kakarot: You're back!

Vegeta: *sighs and shakes his head* I don't know why I rescued you…

Jeril: Veggie! *glomps Vegeta* Kakarot! I can't believe this but I'm actually happy to see you! *gives Kakarot a quick hug* All righty then… Let's see… *reads the reviews and then bursts into tears* I can't believe you people have that little faith in me! When I say I'm going to torture Piccolo with a trip to the zoo accompanied by four hyperactive chibis, I _am_ going to torture Piccolo with a trip to the zoo accompanied by four hyperactive chibis! Wait a second… *checks the number* OVER 200? *faints*


	31. Just one, little, Kami damned creampuff!

"MIRAI-CHAN!" Vicky screamed joyously and glomped the unprepared warrior from the future. Piccolo, Krillin and the others were all to busy staring at the crushed device. Their only hope to return to their dimension, crushed, irreparable.

"What the…" Mirai Trunks looked down at the girl attached to his waist, "Who're you?"

"My name's Vicky and I love you!" she squealed.

"Get off me!" Mirai Trunks yelled and tried to pry the girl off but to no avail. A glomp was a glomp and poor Mirai was helpless.

"Whose that?" Goten asked as they watched Mirai Trunks try to get the girl off, "He looks a lot like Trunks."

"That's because he is." Kakarot answered.

"That's my future self?" Chibi Trunks asked, looking at Mirai Trunks hard.

"Brat!" bellowed Vegeta from where he stood in the doorway. He had heard the commotion and come looking for the source.

"Yes, Dad?" Chibi Trunks answered.

"Yes, Father?" Mirai Trunks answered.

"No, no. The brat from the future!" Vegeta clarified his statement, "What're you doing here?"

"I don't know! I got back to my timeline then I felt something tugging on me! And then, next thing I knew, I was here!" Mirai answered back in a strained voice.

"Another Saiyan to feed… I feel like crying…" I said in a small voice.

Rogue heard me, "Hey, I can cook lunch. I do a mean barbeque. I can even provide the meat."

"Seriously? You'd take on the task of cooking for five Saiyans and seven humans?"

"Well… I'll need a little help so I'll probably put the chibis to work, but yeah. I'll do it."

"Thanks Rogue!" I hugged her, "You're a life saver!"

"Ah, no prob. Anytime. Speaking of time though," she checked her watch, "I'd better get cracking!" Rogue grabbed Zar and gave him a few instructions. He just blew her off. So, Rogue leaned a little closer to his ear and whispered something in it. Zar backed away and, with a pale face, nodded furiously. She gave Goten and Chibi Trunks instructions and, when they protested, she threatened them with no lunch. They all dashed off to do her bidding.

The last chibi left for Rogue to round up was the one attached to Mirai Trunks. Rogue tapped Vicky on the shoulder, "Mind helping me with lunch?"

"But I'm busy!" Vicky complained.

"Please? I'll let you serve Mirai and Chibi Trunks."

"Okay!" Vicky followed Rogue to the kitchen to get the foodstuffs.

"Thank Kami!" Mirai Trunks groaned and collapsed on the couch. He turned to Kakarot, "Goku, would you mind explaining to me where we are?"

"We're in another dimension," Kakarot began, "and it's a weird one. Look at this!" he popped in the DBZ video and Mirai Trunks watched it. Piccolo and Krillin also watched with interest and I remembered that no one had bothered to give them the whole talk.

"You mean…" Mirai Trunks searched for the correct words.

"To them we're just a cartoon show?" Krillin didn't yell the question, but he didn't use a normal tone either.

"Eh, more correctly an anime. You've all got fans everywhere. Even you Piccolo." Mike grinned mischievously, "A lot of girls are convinced you're not asexual." If Piccolo had had eyebrows, he would have lifted them. Instead he just looked… scared.

"I have fans too?" Krillin squeaked.

"Yep, though the Saiyans, especially Vegeta and Goku, are more popular."

"Well, that figures. We're more stronger and definitely better looking then you humans." Vegeta smirked. It was at this point that I left. I knew a verbal fight was going to break out over that remark. Not a physical one though as Vegeta would prolly beat black and blue who ever fought him.

I made my way to the garage, the only part of the house, other then the roof that was unoccupied. I walked over to the freezer and opened it, looking around inside. I spotted a box of creampuffs. My eyes lit up and I pulled the unopened box out, checking how many was inside. One hundred. _I bet I can eat that many in just under a half hour,_ I thought to myself as I walked back upstairs.

I pried off the lid and gazed at the creampuffs in glee. They were most possibly my favorite dessert food and I was starving now that I had something good to eat. I wandered into the living room and camped out on my father's chair to eat my delicious, puffy, delightful food while listening to the argument.

As I sat down, Vegeta looked around and sniffed the air. "Creampuffs…" I heard him mutter and he looked at the box I was holding. "Are you going to eat that entire thing?" he asked me.

"Nope, you see, my creampuff is on the bottom and I'm just working my way down to it." I explained as I ate one of the cream-filled wonders.

"Could you spare one?"

"No!" I growled as I ate another.

"Just one… little creampuff…" He took a menacing step towards me.

"No!" I snarled, and clutched my food tightly, "Get your own, damn it!"

"Just one, ikeike!" Vegeta pleaded.

"No! They're mine! Mine, I tell you!" 

"Just give me one, ikeike! Just one, little, Kami damned creampuff!"

"Never!" I jumped out of the chair and slapped the lid on the box to protect my puffy beauties.

"GIVE THEM TO ME!" Vegeta yelled and jumped at me. I yelped and ran away towards the window to the roof with Vegeta right on my tail. I placed the box on the roof and hauled my ass up the rope as fast as I could. I grabbed the box and ran to the opposite side of the roof as Vegeta climbed up.

"Come on, ikeike. Don't do anything rash. Just give me the box…" Vegeta growled as he inched closer to my side of the roof.

"Never! You hear me? Never! You'll never get one!" I yelled, noticing all the neighbors gathering to watch the odd spectacle. _You'd think they'd have gotten used to this kind of stuff happening at my house by now…_

"JUST GIVE ME A FUCKING CREAMPUFF!" Vegeta screamed.

"NO! NEVER!" I screamed back.

Down on the ground, an elderly lady shook her head and remarked to her two, open-mouthed grandchildren, "This is why you don't do something continuously. You see, these people are creampuff addicts." The children nodded dumbly and watched with wide eyes.

Vegeta stomped toward me and I wildly looked around for a escape route. I glanced over at how far away the roof of the house next to ours was. Fifteen feet. And it was lower then our roof as it was a one-story house and ours was two stories. I did some quick math in my head and surmised that I could make it if I ran. I dashed past Vegeta and ran to the other side. He looked slightly confused and so, while he turning to face me, I ran back past him and took a flying leap at the other roof.

And then I was flying. My mouth curved in a grin as the wind rushed through my hair. I clutched my box of treats to my chest in happiness and chuckled.

And then I was falling. My mouth opened wide and I let loose a scream of horror as the ground rushed up to meet my rapidly falling body.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: Oops… my third cliffhanger in a row… please don't kill me… I just couldn't help myself. It was too good of a chance to pass up! Ehehehe… I've got some bad news for everyone. Well… I'm going on a trip from the 26th to the 14th. And I don't think I'm gonna have the fic finished by then. And I also can't bring my laptop along to write as we're going to another country. *dodges rotten fruit and veggies* It's not my fault! Honestly! I don't wanna go! I swear! *dodges a large boot* Don't lynch me!!

Vegeta: *smirks* Run, ikeike, run!

Kakarot: Congrats to the 225th reviewer, BananaGirl! You get these picture of Vegeta when he's angry and also when he's na-

Jeril: *slaps a hand over Kakarot's mouth* Hehe, you know what pics they are.

Vegeta: What pictures?

Jeril: Don't worry your head, dear Veggie. *evil grin*__


	32. Do you want milk or lemon with your crea...

I crashed into the ground with a resounding _thud_. I lay there for a few moments, watching the pretty lights flash in front of my face. Finally, I slowly sat up and groaned in pain. I opened the lid of the box and checked on my treasure that I had gone through a lot of pain for. They were all whole and I sighed in relief and winced as my body tinged in pain.

"I think I cracked a rib or something…" I muttered to myself as I watched Vegeta jump down from the roof.

He smirked at me. "Share the wealth ikeike, and I won't hurt you."

"Okay… okay…" I groaned, my side aching, "How many you want?"

"Ten." I raised a lone finger in answer, "Okay, five."

"I guess…" I handed him the five creampuffs with much hesitation. He smirked and walked away towards the backyard from where the smell of barbeque was wafting. I sighed and slowly stood. I noticed Kakarot and Mirai were cutting the grass as I brushed off my pants. I grimaced at the grass stains and then walked over to the porch to get back inside. It was locked.

I growled and, as I nibbled on a creampuff, walked all the way around the house to get back in. Bana waved at me cheerfully from where she sat on a wooden bench, watching the two Saiyans slave away and Piccolo meditate. As I passed Vegeta in the backyard, he nabbed a few more. I glared at the hungry Saiyan and snarled wordlessly. He smirked back and walked into the house. I followed him at a distance.

I watched as he attempted to grab some of the cooked food from the kitchen. Rogue picked up a nearby, unused pan and used it like a baseball bat to bash his head. For a few moments, she reminded me of Chichi. I shuddered. Vegeta was knocked back a few steps and he shook his head to clear it.

"Give me food, onna!" he growled.

"Wait till lunch!" Rogue snarled back. They glared at each other, neither looking away. Then, Zar rushed in and crashed into Vegeta, taking the Saiyan no Ouji down.

"GET OFF ME, GAKI!" Vegeta yelled, shoving Zar roughly. The boy went flying across the kitchen to smash into the other wall. "I'm going to sleep. Wake me when lunch is ready." Vegeta stalked off to his room.

"Ohhh… my head…" Zar moaned, sitting up and rubbing his head, "Damn, that hurt…"

"Have a creampuff," I offered one to him, "It'll make the world seem like a happier place!"

"Eh…" Zar looked at the creampuff in my hand then back at me. He shook his head, "No thanks… I'm worried about what you treated them with."

I chuckled, "Your loss is my gain!" I ate the creampuff and saw Kakarot gazing at my creampuffs with longing. "No!" I growled and then was struck with an idea. I chuckled to myself, "On second thought Kakarot, you can have one. And Krillin too! Go sit in the living room and I'll bring them out to you!" I said cheerfully.

"Thanks!" Kakarot said and grinned the Son Grin™ at me. I grinned back as he ran off to the living room.

"You're gonna give those bakas your creampuffs?" Rogue asked me with raised eyebrows.

"With a little 'milk' in them." I chuckled evilly and set the box of creampuffs down on the counter. I opened up our medicine cabinet and took out a bottle labeled 'Milk of Magnesia'.

"You wouldn't!" Rogue exclaimed, snacking on a creampuff, "That's so… so… _evil_!" she grinned but then it faded, "How're you going to do it? They're gonna notice if the creampuffs are soggy."

I felt around in the cabinet a little more then found what I was looking for, "Aha!" I pulled out a needle left over from when my diabetic older sister moved out of the house. I filled up the needle and injected two creampuffs with a good amount while Rogue and I chuckled. "I better remember where this is," I muttered, putting the needle back into the cabinet, "it might come in handy." I put the treated creampuffs on separate plates along with two untreated ones. I put another two on another plate when I remembered that Mirai Trunks was around also.

Trying to keep a straight face, I walked into the living room and handed Kakarot and Krillin the plates with the treated creampuffs and gave Mirai Trunks an untreated plate. They all said thanks and bit into their food. Well, actually, Kakarot stuffed both in his mouth and then looked around for more, Mirai Trunks politely restrained himself and took a civilized bite and Krillin did the same, though he was just acting normal.

Chuckling quietly to myself, I went to the kitchen to pick up my box of creampuffs and then went my room. I sat down at my computer and booted it up. _I feel like some lemon along with my creampuffs…_

As I logged onto fanfiction.net, Bana walked in whistling happily. "Hey! Why're you so cheerful?" I asked her, while checking on my reviews.

"Oh… nothing in particular… other then the fact that I convinced Mirai and Kakarot to go outside and cut the grass and then weed your flowerbed. They took off their shirts so I snapped a few photos." Bana grinned.

"Of Kakarot?" I asked, turning to give her "the look".

"Hey! A Saiyan is a Saiyan!" Bana exclaimed defensively.

"Well… okay, but don't expect me to ogle him like a lovesick fan!"

"I wouldn't either!" I nodded and turned back to the computer to bring up some good lemons. Bana hopped onto my bed and lay down. "You got any good music laying around?" she asked after a few moments of silence.

"Yeah, hold on." I slid in Green Day's 'Dookie' and turned up my stereo system, "'I declare I don't care no more! I'm burning up and out and growing bored in my smoked out boring room!'" I sang along quietly to myself as Bana grabbed an anime magazine off my dresser. She browsed through the magazine as the CD played and I ate my creampuffs while reading a very lemony fanfic.

Suddenly, my door burst open and Vegeta stomped in. "IKEIKE!" he yelled, "TURN THE MUSIC DOWN! I'M TRYING TO SLEEP!" he stormed out again.

I growled and turned up the music even louder. No one told me what to do with my music. Bana winced as her ears took a little time to get used to the new level. She waved at me to get my attention and pointed down. I grudgingly turned it down until she made an 'ok' sign with her thumb and forefinger.

"Did Skittles just say he was trying to go to sleep?" Bana yelled over the blaring music, an evil gleam in her eye.

"Yeah, what're ya planning?" I answered, turning down the music so we could talk and not hurt our throats.

"Just a little fun with the camera!" she grinned mischievously and hopped off my bed.

I sighed and grinned, "Don't get caught! And be sure to wait until you're sure he's asleep."

"Me? Get caught? How could you even suggest such a thing?" Bana asked in a hurt tone coupled with a cocky grin. She pulled the camera out of her pocket and out the door she went. I shook my head and hoped no harm would come to her.

"Speaking of harm…" I muttered and rubbed my aching ribs. I felt like someone had taken a sledgehammer and smashed me in the back with it. My ribs felt like they had been taken out, barbequed and then stuck back in again. _Barbeque…_ I sniffed the air. The smell of Rogue's wonderful cooking was beginning to reach my room. My stomach growled and I ate some more creampuffs in answer.

Then, I heard a fierce shout erupt from the direction of Veggie's room along with a slamming door. A few moments later, Bana skipped into the room. "Hiya!" she said with a big smile.

"I expect, from the delighted smile on your face, that you got the pics. Am I right?"

"Hell yes!" Bana smirked and grabbed two creampuffs, "and you wouldn't believe what Vegetable Head was cuddled up with."

"What?"

"A teddy bear! He was so adorable looking as he was also sucking his thumb!"

"Veggie was sucking his thumb? How kawaii!" I asked incredulously as I finished the last creampuff.

"Yes!" Bana jumped up on my bed and began bouncing around.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Don't kill my mattress! I have to sleep on that thing, ya know!" Bana just kept on bouncing.

I shook my head and stood, "I'm gonna go check on how lunch is coming along." I walked out of the room and down the hallway. I could hear muffled cursing coming from the bathroom and I saw Krillin standing outside, dancing around cussing his head off. "What's the matter, shiny?" I asked him.

"Goku's taking his good time and I need to go-o-o!" he whined.

"Well, there's a bathroom in my parent's bedroom if you want to risk Vegeta's wra-" but Chrome Dome was gone already. I listened and I soon heard the sweet music of Vegeta yelling at Krillin and Krillin screaming he couldn't wait. I chortled and made my way to the kitchen. _How I love to made other people miserable!_

Mirai Trunks was in the kitchen and Rogue, being nicer to him then most, had given him some of the barbeque to munch on. He was finishing it as I came in. "Was it good?" I asked as I watched him lick his fingers clean.

"The best I've ever had!" he answered and Rogue beamed with pride.

"Thanks! I've never had a complaint about my barbeque!" she announced.

"Can I have a piece?" I asked.

She fixed me with the evil eye, "No, wait till lunch." She growled as she gave Mirai Trunks another piece. The fighter from the future gave me an uncharacteristic Vegeta Smirk as he began to eat his food. I tried to give Rogue my best Imitation Son Puppy Eyes™ but she was not to be fooled. "Wait!" she barked and I retreated from the kitchen.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: For those of you who want to know, I'm going to Scotland. Awh, how adorable! Vegeta! You are just tooooo kawaii! *glomps Veggie who snarls and shoves Jeril away* *lol* I just looooooooove torturing dear Kakarot and Krillin! Muwhahaha!!

Vegeta: *wipes away a fake tear* That was such a beautiful trick… It was so good that I forgive you about lying about me sucking my thumb.

Kakarot: Well I didn't think it was very funny! *growls at Jeril*

Jeril: *backs away* C'mon Kakarot! It was for the sake of humor!

Kakarot: *cups his hands* Kame-hame-

Jeril: Eeps! Gotta go people! *runs away from the insane Saiyan*

Kakarot: HA! *sends the blast after Jeril*__


	33. You don't want to know what goes on in t...

Finally, after many more minutes of sitting and being tortured by the wonderful aromas that were drifting from the kitchen, Rogue called everyone to eat. We gathered at the table and dug in with relish. It was delicious.

"Rogue! This is great! Better then Chichi's cooking!" Kakarot announced, bits of food spraying around him. Krillin was still occupying the restroom.

"Thanks!" Rogue grinned and ducked a large chunk that was coming toward her face.

"Rogue," I said around a large mouthful of ribs, "you better come over more here often to cook."

"Yeah!" Zar agreed, piling more onto his plate.

"Hey Piccolo!" Mike piped up, "You're looking a little more green then usual. Anything wrong?"

Piccolo took a small sip of his water, "Barbeque… does not agree with me."

"Are you insulting my cooking?" Rogue growled dangerously.

"What is with you two and cooking?" Chibi Trunks asked.

Mike looked up from his plate and then he opened his big mouth, "Cooking is a very important part of their psychology. For females, being able to cook well is like a security blanket. If they do everything else wrong, they always can fall back on cooking to-" Mike noticed every girl at the table was glaring at him.

"Do you wish to stay in our good graces?" I growled.

"Eh… yes?"

"Then shut the hell up." Bana snarled. Mike paled and returned his gaze, and mouth, to his food.

The rest of the meal was uneventful and soon everyone was helping to clean up the mess. Well, everyone but the chibis. The boys were bouncing around, laughing and chattering on about the zoo. Vicky had latched herself onto Mirai Trunks' arm and would not let go. I felt almost sorry for the purple-haired warrior. It wasn't his fault that he was hot. He was just born that way and the whole horrible future thing also made girls feel sorry for him.

"How long do you guys want to stay at the zoo?" I asked the boys.

"Till it closes!" Zar announced.

"That's at eight o'clock, Zar. Nuh uh. You're coming back at five, okay?"

"All right…"

"Okay then. Bana, you want to take them there?" I asked her.

"No, your turn."

"Okay. Where's Piccolo?" I asked, looking around.

"Right here," I looked over and Piccolo was standing right beside me.

"Ooookay… you just kind of… snuck up on me." I looked at Piccolo. _Creepy…_ "All right, this train's moving out!" I yelled. The boys dashed off to the car and Piccolo followed at a much more dignified pace. I looked around for Vicky and noticed she was still clinging to Mirai Trunks. "C'mon Vicky!"

"No! I want to stay right here with Mirai!" Vicky growled.

"But I'm going to make you let go of him anyway. If you go with Piccolo and the boys, you can glomp Chibi Trunks all you want because I don't think Piccolo will stop you."

"Really?" Vicky's eyes lit up and she was off like a shot for the car. I chuckled as Mirai rubbed his bruised limb and then made my own way to the car.

I climbed into the driver's seat, checked to make sure the chibis were all buckled in and then started the ten-minute drive to the zoo.

Vegeta watched the car drive away. "Okay Kakarot! It's time to put the plan in motion! Follow me!" he led the way to Bouke's room.

"But Vegeta… she might get mad that we went through-"

"Shut up, baka! If you don't want to do this, then leave!" Vegeta growled, turning around to glare at the taller Saiyan.

"I don't want to, Vegeta. She's been really nice. She's fed us, gave us clothes and everything. So, count me out." Goku turned and walked away.

"Baka…" Vegeta growled to himself as he stormed into the girl's room, "doesn't even deserve to be called a Saiyan." 

The Saiyan no Ouji looked around, scanning the room. He noted the notebooks and sketchpads lying around and then his eyes locked onto the computer that Bouke had left on. "What have we here?" Vegeta smirked and sat down in the comfy computer chair. He puzzled over the computer for a few moments as it was horribly primitive but he soon grasped how to work it.

He clicked on the minimized window to bring it up. He skipped over the title and got down to the story itself. After the first few paragraphs, his face was burning up and he re-minimized the window. He definitely didn't want to know more of what Goku and Yamcha did on this camping trip.

Vegeta opened up the next window. This time though, he read the title: How to Rape a Namek. "Gah!" Vegeta minimized that window also, "This girl has issues!" Vegeta opened up the next window, which was a document. He read the PWP that the girl had written and nearly gagged. "The onna, cue ball, myself, Kakarot and his harpy? _Together?_"

"Oh, hiya Veggie!" Vegeta swiveled around in the chair to face Bana.

"What do you want, gaki?" he snarled.

"Well… do you really wanna know?" she grinned as she asked the question.

"Never mind."

"Whatcha doing?" she looked at the screen, looked over the PWP. She tsked at him, "Vegeta! I'm ashamed of you! Snooping around on other people's computers! Well, actually, I'm not, but still! It's not very dignified!"

"But-"

"Anyway, great fic, huh? I didn't even think that five people was possible till she wrote this. Also, when Krillin starts coming onto Vegeta and then Bulma and Chichi-"

"I don't want to hear anymore!" Vegeta growled and cover his ears. He stalked out of the room, wishing he had never gone in there in the first place.

"What did you find, Vegeta?" Goku asked as Vegeta slid into the chair.

"Believe me, Kakarot. You don't want to know what goes on in that girl's mind." Vegeta rubbed his temples and heaved a sigh.

"I don't?"

"Yes, you don't."

"Okay!" Goku turned on the television and sat down to watch Spongebob Squarepants. (AN: I just realized that Goku reminds me of Patrick!)

I pulled in front of the zoo entrance and the chibis piled out of the car. Piccolo unbuckled his seatbelt and opened his door. "Are you sure you don't need me to come?" I asked the Namek. I kind of feared for his safety. Going to a zoo with four hyper chibis is not exactly good for one's health.

"Yes, I am positive." Piccolo answered and got out of the car.

I rolled down the window and handed him enough money to cover him and the chibis. "Be careful." I said. He nodded and followed the chibis to the ticket place. He bought the tickets and then they entered the zoo.

I watched them go and then started the drive home. I looked in the rearview mirror and watched the zoo grow smaller and smaller as I drove further away from it. I shivered and tried to ignore the bad feeling that was collecting in the pit of my stomach.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: Many, many tanx to calikocat for reviewing every chap!! And thanks to everyone else!! Especially the people who left really long reviews! Glomps all around!! *glomp*

*sniffles* I'm going to miss every single one of you! Don't forget about me though! I'm going to bring a notebook with me to write chaps while I'm on the trip. So I'll prolly have a new one up on the 15th or 16th. Well… *takes a deep breath* This is most likely my last chap before I leave. *wipes away a tear* I already said it but I'm gonna say it again, I'm going to miss you all!!

Vegeta: Don't get all teary-eyed on them, baka.

Jeril: I can't help it! *breaks down in tears* I need a hug!

Kakarot: Okay. *hugs Jeril*

Jeril: No, you baka! *shoves him away* Not from you! *cries*

Vegeta: *shakes his head furiously* Nuh uh! No way! *Jeril continues to cry* You can't make me! *Jeril is still crying* I won't! *still crying* No! Never! *Jeril begins to wail along with crying* Okay, okay, OKAY! ONE HUG! *hugs Jeril but Jeril glomps him in return*

Jeril: YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!! I GOTS MY VEGGIE!!! AND HE LOVES ME! *grins*

Vegeta: I DON'T LOVE YOU, KISAMA!! *Jeril snuggles Vegeta* GET OFF ME!!


	34. Woman Oppressor!

Zar bounced through the entrance of the zoo. He had a huge smile on his face and he immediately began babbling, "We need to see the tigers, pygmy marmosets, platypi, komodo dragons, otters, and the SNAKES!" Zar clapped his hands together and giggled, "Feeding time's AWESOME!! And you should see-"

"Shut up, gaki!" Piccolo growled and stared at a brochure the people at the ticket counter had given him. They had given him a lot of weird looks because of his skin color.

Zar snatched the brochure from him, "The komodo dragon feeding time is in ten minutes! COME ON!" he ran down the open lane of the exhibits. The other chibis shot off after him. Piccolo heaved a large sigh and shook his head as he dashed after the chibis.

He followed their kis until he arrived at the exhibit Zar had mentioned. The Namek looked around and spotted the chibis. They were up front, watching with fascination as a caretaker threw large gobbets of raw meat at the large lizards in the habitat.

After watching for a few minutes and listening to the caretaker tell about the animal, Goten tugged on his free hand that he was waving around. The caretaker glared at him. "Can I feed them?" Goten asked.

"No! Of course not!" the caretaker answered angrily.

"Why not?" Goten asked.

"Well… because…" the caretaker was at a loss. He had obviously never been asked this question before. "Eh, your parents would get mad."

"No they wouldn't!" Trunks piped up. He pointed at Piccolo, "He's the guy who's taking us around and he wouldn't mind! Right?" he looked at Piccolo hopefully. Piccolo shrugged. "See?"

"But-" Goten and Trunks grabbed the bag of meat and dashed away from the caretaker. Then, they stuck their hands in the raw meat and started throwing it at the lizards.

"NOOOOO!" the caretaker screamed and ran at the chibis. They grinned and were about to jump into the air with the bag when a man behind them grabbed their shirts. The boys growled in anger and began kicking their legs. The caretaker grabbed the meat bag and nodded thankfully to the man holding the chibis. He moved back over to his spot and continued his orientation from where Goten had interrupted.

"Leggo o' me!!" Trunks snarled and turned to bite the man's hand. The man dropped the demi-Saiyan and the lilac-haired child landed on his rear.

"AWH! POOR TRUNKSIE!" Vicky shrieked and ran over to the demi-Saiyan. Trunks looked like he was about to cry as Vicky latched onto him and began stroking his hair.

The man turned to Piccolo and eyed the Namek, "Are you the…" he searched for the right word and then drew in a breath, "_owner_ of these children?"

For a few moments, Piccolo studied the man who stood in front of him with arms crossed. He noted the black jacket, white shirt, black slacks, and shades. The man looked like he had stepped out of a really bad action flick.  "You could say that…" Piccolo finally growled, "Drop him." The man complied and Goten landed in a heap. He stood up and rubbed his posterior, muttering under his breath. Piccolo again spoke, "Who're you?"

"I work in the research section of the zoo," he answered, extending a hand, "Patrick McConnell."

Piccolo eyed the scientist's hand for a moment and then decided to ignore it.

One of the sides of McConnell's mouth drew up in a small smile. He took off his sunglasses and tucked them in a breast pocket. Piccolo was immediately drawn into the man's intense, piercing, green eyes. They seemed to peel away his skin and study his innards, recording everything.

McConnell had a face that resembled that of a bird of prey. His nose was curved like a beak and he seemed to never hold his head straight. Instead he tilted it down so he looked at people from under his eyebrows. It gave his eyes a sharp, predatory look that, coupled with their shocking bright color and the man's slight smile, put Piccolo on edge.

The Namek suppressed a shudder he knew would be very visible and instead turned to the chibis, "Where to next, kid?" he asked Zar.

"Eh…" Zar studied the map for a moment, "Let's go to the snake, amphibian and reptile section!"

"That's one of the zoo's best sections. I highly recommend it," McConnell commented, "Amphibians are my specialty."

"Awesome!" the chibis all took off again and Piccolo stood for a moment, watching them go. Then, he glanced once at the scientist who was staring at him oddly before Piccolo set off at a dignified walk after the chibis. He didn't know why, but McConnell almost _scared_ him. Piccolo fought off a strong urge to look over his shoulder as he walked away. He shivered instead because he knew that the strange, disturbing, soul-searing eyes were still studying him.

I parked the car in the driveway and stared at the house. It seemed so peaceful right now. I knew that there was probably a riot going on inside and Rogue and Krillin were probably at each other's throats but outside, everything was calm and tranquil. Not for long though as after about five minutes of sitting there, Krillin came sailing through the window of the living room.

"Oh shit!" I yelled as I opened the car door and got out. I ran over to the human, "You okay?"

"I'll survive," Krillin answered, sitting up and wincing. I looked him over. He wasn't too badly cut up just a few short scratches and two longer and nastier looking ones.

"You better clean those up a.s.a.p." I told him.

"Yes, don't want you getting an infection, now do we?" Rogue grinned from where she stood in, framed in the broken window. I saw Vegeta standing behind her with the Vegeta Smirk™ plastered on his face.

"What did you do?" I asked the bald fighter as I watched him struggle to his feet.

"Nothing at all! I swear!" Krillin said in his defense.

"Oh, yeah! Sure! Right!" Rogue yelled sarcastically from the window.

"Okay, well, my digestive system didn't take Rogue's cooking too well and-"

"HE THREW IT UP!" Rogue screamed.

"I didn't mean to!" Krillin yelled back.

"YEAH RIGHT!" Rogue jumped out of the broken window, remarkably not getting scratched. She grabbed the short human by the neck and began strangling him while screaming obscenities. "I'll teach you to insult my cooking, you noseless, dickless freak! Die, motherfucker, DIE!"

"Whoa! Rogue! That's a little harsh! You might hurt his mother's feelings!" I said as I laughed.

"Oooo! Burn!" Bana chuckled, standing beside Vegeta, watching the fight.

Krillin made a choking noise while he desperately tried to throw Rogue off. "I wouldn't be afraid of harming his mother's feelings," Vegeta remarked, "She's probably too ashamed of him to admit she is his mother."

"What the…" Kakarot looked out the window, "What're doing, Krillin?"

"Huh-huh-hel-puh!" Krillin gurgled out as he face began to go throw the many shades of red.

"Wha? Krillin I can't understand you! Speak up!"

"Hel-HEL-PUH!" Krillin's face was turning a nice shade of purple now. Vegeta and Bana jumped through the window to get a better view.

"Hell… puh… Hell-puh. Help! Ooohhh! I get it!" Kakarot grinned and jumped out the window to stand by me and watch, "Nah, you don't need any help Krillin! She's just a girl, after all!" Kakarot got two glares fixed on him for that statement, Rogue was too occupied with Krillin to bother.

"Excuse me," Bana growled, "but I just hear a remark on how weak women are?"

"Yeah, of course women are weaker!"

"No. We. Aren't." I hissed.

"Oh… hehe, no, eh… I said something else… yeah…" Kakarot put his hand behind his head and smiled the Son Grin™ while he backed away from us enraged females.

"Woman oppressor!" I screamed and we launched ourselves at the Saiyan. Vegeta had to hold his sides, he was laughing so hard as he watched his rival be beaten black-and-blue by two human females.

"Weak? You call women _weak_? Your wife's able to control you with a _frying pan_ for Kami's sake! Look at the pot calling the kettle black!" Bana ranted as she whipped out a frying pan and began bashing Kakarot on the head with it. 

"Pot? Kettle? Huh? What the… AHHHHHHHHH! NO, CHICHI, NOOOOOOO!" Kakarot screamed, covering his head with his hands, trying to defend himself.

"YOU JUST CALLED ME CHICHI! YOU SON OF A SAIYAN BITCH!" I backed off as Bana went just a tad overboard with the frying pan.

"I always thought Chichi was an abusive wife…" I said to myself.

"NOOOOOOOO!! IT CAN'T END THIS WAY! I WON'T DIE BY A MERE FRYING PAN!"

"YES YOU WILL! AND I WILL TAKE MY RIGHTFUL AND PROPER PLACE BY VEGGIE'S SIDE AS HIS MATE!" Bana laughed maniacally.

"Whoa… those things give you a real power trip…" I muttered to myself as I watched Kakarot go Super Saiyan and grab the slightly insane girl by the back of her shirt. He threw her across the yard and then flew onto the roof.

"YOU'LL NEVER ESCAPE US, KAKAROT!" Bana yelled at the Super Saiyan who was cowering on the roof in fear, "NEVER, YOU HEAR? NEVER!"

"Hey, Bana?" I asked as we returned to watching Rogue kick Krillin's unconscious form.

"Yeah?" she was breathing heavily.

"Where did you get that frying pan from?" I asked, pointing at the deadly weapon she clutched in one white-knuckled hand.

"Uh…" she scratched her head with her free hand and stared at the frying pan, "I dunno actually. It just kinda… was there when I needed it."

"I think we've been hanging out with anime characters too long…"

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Jeril: *ranting* You know what?! Just about two hours after I posted the last chap, my baka parents decided to finally tell me that _they_ were leaving on the 26th!! I'm leaving on the 29th to meet up with them in Seattle! GAAAAAAAAAARG!!!! I SAY GAAAAAAARG!! And I would've had this out yesterday if it hadn't been for my damned network! Piece of shit!! AHHHHHHHHHHH!!! *pants heavily*

Vegeta: Calm down, baka onna. This means you can get out another chap or two before you leave.

Kakarot: He's right!

Jeril: But my grandparents are visiting too!! So that means that I'm gonna be occupied with showing 'em around town! Grrrrs… I'll try to get out one or two more chaps before I leave. I have half of the next one completed. Anywho, that fic I mentioned in the last chap, _How to Rape a Namek_, is a real fic. *rofl* It's hilarious!

Vegeta: *lifts an eyebrow* And how did you come across this in the first place?

Jeril: *blushes* Well… uh… I wanted a little lemon to go with my creampuff. So, I went looking for one… and I found one…

Kakarot: Question! *Jeril gestures for him to go on* What's a lemon?

Jeril: Eh… hehe… never mind that Kakarot! I have some translations to do! Ahem! Kuso kurae = shit then die. Gaki = brat. Also, I get "™" on my word program by hitting the "crtl", "alt" and "t" buttons simulationously.

Also! To our 325th reviewer, Chibi Vegeta Girl! You get… *digs around in treasure box* A box of creampuffs!! *hands them over*


	35. But I'm asexual

Finally, Rogue realized that the short ex-monk could no longer feel what she was inflicting on him. So, she decided to tie him up and wait until he awoke. Then she planned to burn him. I didn't bother asking her where. I had an idea of where and I didn't want my suspicions confirmed.

"Hey Rogue?" I suddenly recalled something.

"What?"

"Why did you call Krillin 'dickless'? Is this a fact you know?" I asked as we stood on the porch, watching her collect some equipment to use on Krillin.

"Eh… I read it in my monthly issue of 'The Bakas of DBZ'." Rogue replied.

I was confused, "Say what?"

"Well, it was started by this DBZ fan who really, really hated Chiaotzu, Tien, and Krillin with a passion. Then, due to demand, she expanded to cover every character. Every magazine has three to six articles, lists, hate fics, etc. on a specific character. There's different characters in every one as sometimes they don't have enough to make a section."

"How do you subscribe?" I asked.

"I'll show you the site sometime." I nodded my thanks and Bana and I made our way to the living room.

"So, what you want to do?" Mike asked, as he lay down on the couch, staring at the ceiling.

"I dunno… I'm too bored to think of something…" Bana answered from where she was sprawled out on the floor.

"Me too…" I said, heaving a sigh. Mirai Trunks was camped out on my tousan's chair and I was glaring at him. I was just about to try to heave him off when Mike announced he had a great idea.

"Do tell!" Bana sat up, ready to do something interesting.

"We could play…" Mike's face got an innocent, yet malicious smirk on it, "_Spin the Bottle_."

"Seriously?" my eyes lit up with an inner, evil light.

"Oh yeah!" Bana smirked and at that moment she resembled Vegeta greatly.

"What's 'Spin the Bottle'?" Mirai Trunks asked. We all face-faulted and would have sweatdropped if we had been in an anime.

"You don't know what 'Spin the Bottle' is?" Bana asked in an amazed tone.

"Nope."

"Well… don't worry. You'll like it a lot." I said with an evil grin.

"Hey! Father!" Mirai Trunks called out, "We're going to play a game! Spin the Bottle! Want to play?"

"What's 'Spin the Bottle'?" Vegeta asked.

"You'll like it! Believe me!" Bana and I chorused.

"All right then." Vegeta came in followed by Kakarot.

"Can I play?" the younger Saiyan asked.

"Sure!" Mike grinned evilly. Bana and I fixed him with twin glares.

"You'll pay for that, asswipe…" Bana hissed.

"You bastard…" I growled at him.

"Should we share the wealth?" Bana asked me after we had mouthed a few more death threats at Mike.

"Why not? There's enough to go around!" I said. Bana nodded and I got up and yelled the good news at Rogue. She grabbed Krillin and dragged him inside so she could join in the game. Bana ran to the kitchen and retrieved a glass bottle. We all arranged ourselves in a circle, except Krillin, and Mike explained the rules.

"Okay, one of the girls will start us off. She will spin the bottle-"

"Wow! That's the title!" I said sarcastically.

"Shut up!" Mike growled, "Anyway, she will spin the bottle and whoever it lands on will be the person she kisses. The kisses will change every round. Some examples are: cheek, mouth, french, licking and kissing the arms, sucking on toes and/or fingers, etc."

"But," I cut in, "if it lands on a person of the same gender as the spinner, the bottle with be spun again."

"What?!?" Vegeta yelled, "I will play no such game!"

"Yeah! Chichi would kill me!" Kakarot paled.

"The onna would be more pissed off then ever before!" Vegeta looked almost scared.

"Awh… can Veggie and Kakie be controlled by women?" I said mockingly.

"That's okay, _boys_," Bana said patronizingly, "If you're too afraid to play, we understand."

"_Afraid to play?_" Vegeta growled.

"Yeah, if you want to be babies that's okay." I added.

"Boys? Babies?" Kakarot's face hardened with resolution and he had a new look on his face that resembled the one that he wore when he face Frieza, "I'm not a child! C'mon Vegeta! We can do this!"

"So long as the onnas don't find out…" Vegeta mumbled under his breath, unaware that Bana, Rogue and I could hear him.

"Round one! Cheeks!" Mike announced. He seemed to have decided to be both a player and referee of the game.

"Which set?" Rogue asked impishly. Her entire face shone with an inner evil that was just about to be let loose on the world.

_Kami save the Saiyans…_ I thought to myself with a mental smirk. "I'll start us off!" I yelled and grabbed the bottle. I gave it a good, fast spin and waited to with bated breath to see who would be the first victim.

"Where to next Zar?" Piccolo felt like he was going to collapse from exhaustion. _I never knew trying to keep track of four chibis could be so hard…_ he heaved a sigh.

"The otters!" Zar yelled and ran off. The chibis were close behind him. Piccolo shook his head and began walking, following the chibis' ki. He was just so damn tired, almost more tired then he had ever been in his life before. _Why me, Kami? Why ME? Gah… now I know why I never decided to have a kid…_

When he arrived on the scene, he would have started pulling his hair out if he had been human and screaming. But Nameks are much more composed in stressful times and so Piccolo just grimaced.

The four chibis had somehow gotten into the exhibit and the two humans were petting the otters and feeding them fish they had gotten somehow. The demi-Saiyans were swimming with the otters and diving for stones at the bottom of the pool. Trunks came up hauling a rock as big as his head. The other people visiting the zoo started clapping while an annoyed looking caretaker talked to a few burly security guards.

"Shit…" Piccolo muttered under his breath. He leapt over the small wall and landed in the middle of the habitat. He looked over at Zar and Vicky with murder in his eyes.

"Eh… Hiya Piccolo-sama… what's up?" Zar smiled sheepishly.

"Out. Now." Piccolo growled.

"But Piccolo! We were just starting to have-" Goten started.

"I SAID NOW!" Piccolo barked.

"Okay, okay. Sheesh. Keep your turban on." Trunks muttered as he jumped over the wall, taking Vicky with him as she had grabbed onto his arm again. Goten followed and Piccolo grabbed Zar by the back of his shirt and threw him over the wall. Luckily, Goten was there to cushion his fall. Piccolo followed them.

"Okay! That's it! No more-"

"Tiger feeding time!" Goten and Trunks yelled after they heard some people beside them mention it.

"YEAH!" Vicky and Zar screamed. The four chibis took off again.

"No… not again…" Piccolo took a ragged breath and sat down on a bench, "I'm gonna cry…"

"Don't cry Piccolo!" A voice beside him said.

"Yeah!" chimed in two voices.

"We'll cheer you up!" another voice said. Piccolo looked up and saw a group of girls surrounding him.

"W-who are you?" Piccolo asked, afraid of the answer.

"Why Piccolo!" a brunette said with a hurt expression, "How could you not know me? I've written so many yaoi fics about you and Gohan! You two are so kawaii!"

"But I fancy you and Nail more! Or Dende! Or all of you!" said a blond with a hentai smirk.

"W-w-what?"

"Hey! Bulma and Piccolo forever!" a guy in the back said. A few girls took him down with yells of "No! GOHAN!" or "VEGGIE AND PICCIE!" or "GOKU ALL THE FUCKING WAY, BABY!" or even one "PICCOLO AND ROSHI!"

"But… I'm asexual." Piccolo said in a confused voice.

"WHAT?!?" the group screamed as one.

"YOU CAN'T BE PICCOLO! I'VE WAITED MY ENTIRE LIFE FOR YOU!" the blond howled.

"YEAH! YOU'RE MY ONE TRUE LOVE!" the brunette screamed.

"I LOVE YOU PICCOLO!" the guy yelled and ran through the crowd to throw his arms around Piccolo's neck and give him a kiss on the cheek.

"NO! HE'S MINE!" the blond screamed and ripped the guy off so she could punch him in the face.

"NO! MINE!" a raven-haired thirty-year-old woman shrieked, kicking the blond in the stomach and then accidentally punching the brunette. This little accident started a full-fledged riot. Piccolo flew over the mob and then landed a ways away. He leaned up against a wall, breathing heavily.

"My Kami… they love me?" Piccolo shuddered. He leaned against that for a moment, composing himself. Then, he reached out and searched for the chibis' ki. They were no where to be found…

"Boy, am I glad you taught me 'n Vicky to hide our kis when we were playing hide 'n seek!" Zar said with a grin as they stood outside the lion pen.

"Yeah!" Vicky agreed from where she clung to Trunks' arm.

"Well, here's the plan…" Goten and the two humans listened as Trunks outlined a wonderfully evil plan entitled _Operation: Fill 'em up_.

"What if we get in trouble?" Zar asked after it was fully explained.

"Well… then we do this." Goten showed them the Son Puppy Eyes™ and had the other three practice them for a few minutes. Then, Goten and Trunks set off for the deer pen while Zar and Vicky began to scope out the tiger exhibit.

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Jeril: Poor Piccolo… I'm soory!! It was just too rich of an opportunity to pass up!! Oooo… They're playing Spin the Bottle! Muwhahaha… I'm thinking of figuring out what happens in the game by using a bottle and things to represent the characters IRL. O.o;; Did that make sense? I hate it when I don't make sense. -_- It happens to me a lot…

Vegeta: That's because you're a baka and a stupid ikeike.

Jeril: Why do you call me names? *sniffles* I write this entire fic about _you_ and you call me names! Waaaaaaaaaaaah!! *starts crying*

Vegeta: *rolls eyes* Oh Kami… not again…

Kakarot: Cheer up Jer! Have a creampuff! *hands Jeril a creampuff*

Jeril: *sniffles* Well, at least someone has some manners! *eats the creampuff* Kakarot, sometimes you can be so better then Vegeta.

Vegeta: Kakarot? Better then me! NEVER! *throws a creampuff at Jeril* Here! Have a creampuff! HAVE THE WHOLE BOX! *throws the box at her*

Jeril: *claps* Yeah! Tanx Veggie! I love you too! *grins and hands Vegeta a dozen roses*

Vegeta: -_-;; I think I encouraged her…


	36. I'm practicing being your future stepmot...

**Son Natari, in reply to your request:** I'm soory that you are going to have to stop reading my fic because of the bashing of a certain Saiyan. I'm soory to lose you but it's your decision on whether you read Kakarot bashing fics or not but, when you think about it, this isn't a Kakarot bashing fic and it's not a Krillin bashing fic. I don't bash them, I make fun of them. This fic's meant to be humorous and so I take advantage of every situation I can think of. I've even made fun of Vegeta a few times if you think about it. I just don't make fun of him as much because he's my fave anime guy, but also, that's bad for him and could be taken as bashing because the three girls all want to get in bed with him and he doesn't want to. Also, the dislike of Kakarot in this fic is in many of the characters' characters and to change them now would destroy the fic and lose what dignity and credibility I have and the respect I have earned. Two of the girls are based on authors and I'm quite sure they would lynch me if I dared to change how they treat Kakarot because it's not mine to change. To say it simply in a saying from my youth: _I would if I could, but I can't so I won't._ You see my logic here? P.S. I'm a Vegeta fan and I like to knock Kakarot around every once and awhile. Verbally that is. I could never take him on IRL. *grin* I'm too weak. Way too weak.

On to the Author's Note: I BE BACK!! HAPPINESS ABOUNDS! *cough* Yello everyone!! I be back! Tanx be to Kami! I'm sooooooo happy!! You all cannot believe how happy I am!! Do you know there's a city named "Oban" in Scotland? That's a bad word in Japanese! Hehehe… Well, I've had enough Scotland to last me three lifetimes! We must have visited over 30 castles and abbeys! Gah! Too many! And way, way, _way_ too many old men walking around in kilts. *shudder* So much time was spent in the car! We drove around 1800 miles! All I could do was listen to my CDs, think of you guys, look at the scenery and think up ideas for the stories! Also-

Random Reviewer: Stop whining and get to work, baka slave! *cracks whip* Write the new chap and be quick about it!

Jeril: Oooooooooooookay… *sweatdrop* Anywho, I'm back, I'm happy and here's a chap! (I tried to write the Spin the Bottle game good! I really did!)

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Kneeling, I watched the bottle twirl around and around in sweet anticipation. Yes, there was a chance that it would land on Kakarot but that was a risk I would have to take. There were two other cute guys there and one hot one. Three out of four, I liked those odds. Hell, they could have been worse if Krillin and Piccolo was playing!

Vegeta, Mirai Trunks, Mike, Kakarot, Vegeta, Mirai Trunks… The bottle just kept spinning and spinning. I regretted spinning it so hard as I wanted to kiss Vegeta and I wanted to kiss him _now_. Then, it began to slow down and soon it was moving sluggishly. I crossed my fingers and watched in horror as the slow bottle's tip pointed toward Kakarot… but luckily it kept moving. I grinned to myself. Vegeta was mine! But that damn bottle kept going and stopped on the next person. Mirai Trunks.

I stared at him for a moment and then resignedly shuffled into the circle a little ways and gave the purple-haired fighter a peck on the cheek. His face flared up like the night of the Fourth of July as I got back into my spot in the circle. He mumbled under his breath and then hurriedly spun the bottle. Around it spun and landed on Bana. Mirai Trunks reluctantly kissed her. She grinned, rubbed her hands together and gave the bottle a good twist. It landed on Vegeta.

"You lucky devil!" Rogue exclaimed.

"I envy you…" I growled. Bana chuckled quite evilly and turned on her victim.

Vegeta glared at her viciously. "Bakana onna, if you come one inch closer to me I will rip your throat out."

"Awh. Is Veggie afraid of a teenage girl?" Rogue asked.

"How kawaii!" I grinned.

"I am not afraid of her!" Vegeta snarled.

"Then why don't you be a man and submit willingly?" Bana leered.

"Fine!" Vegeta scrunched up his eyes and turned his face, exposing his cheek. Bana smirked evilly and leaned forward. She kissed his cheek but before he could pull away, she threw her arms around him and began smothering his face in kisses.

"GAAAAAH! GET THIS STUPID IKEIKE OFF ME!" Vegeta yelled and tried to pry her off. Kakarot and Mirai Trunks lent a hand and, with all of their Saiyan strength combined, they were able to get the Veggie crazed fan off of the Saiyan no Ouji.

"But Veggie…" I sniffled, trying to make him feel bad, "That's your pet name for me…" I sniffed really loudly. Mike, Mirai Trunks and Kakarot looked at me and I could have sworn that they sweatdropped.

"Shut up, ikeike…" Vegeta growled and spun the bottle.

"I love you too Veggie!" I chirped earning death glares from both Rogue and Bana. 'Mine' they both mouthed at me.

I stared at the bottle and willed it my way. _C'mon! Pleeeeeeease!_ I mentally begged the bottle, promising to polish it and keep it in a china cabinet for the rest of my life if it would just land on me. The bottle stopped but not on me, or Bana or even Rogue. It stopped on Mike. Vegeta glared at my human friend like it was somehow his fault and spun the bottle again.

This time it landed on Rogue. I could tell by her face that she was practically floating above the clouds mentally. The only thing that was tying her down physically was the fact that her body was required to stay in the circle.

Vegeta grimaced. "Great… it lands on the ugliest of them all."

"Did you hear that?" Bana asked.

"He thinks we're beautiful!" I exclaimed.

Vegeta growled at us and shook his head. Then he looked at Rogue. She smirked back. "What's the matter Veggie? Too scared to do the deed?" she asked mockingly. _We know which buttons to push to turn up the heat in anger. We're still working on the lust part_,I thought to myself. Suddenly, Vegeta kind of shifted in his position and then Rogue shot back, startled.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"I dunno…" Rogue looked at Vegeta oddly. He was smirking his sweet, evil, gotta-love-Veggie smirk that just made me want to jump his bones right then and there.

"Your turn," Vegeta said.

"What?!" we three girls shrieked in unison.

"I'm fast," he stated.

"Bakayaro!" Rogue snarled. Vegeta just smirked back.

"New rule!" Mike announced, "No more super speed stuff. We humans can't do that so it's not fair."

"Shimatta," Kakarot growled.

"Kuso," Mirai Trunks muttered.

"Go wash out your mouth with a bar of soap, young man!" Bana shrieked.

"Nani?" he gave her an odd look.

"I'm practicing being your future stepmother," Bana threw back her head and laughed evilly.

"Not in a million lifetimes, bakana onna," Vegeta said, baring his teeth.

"Oooo… I think he's a tiger that needs to be tamed," Rogue chuckled and cracked an imaginary whip. (AN: Soory, it's an inside joke with my two friends. *lol*)

"I volunteer for the job!" Bana exclaimed.

"Excuse me but we have a game going here!" Mike slapped the bottle into Rogue's hand. She spun it and it landed on Kakarot.

"Do I have to?" she asked Mike.

"Yup," he grinned and I could swear it was bordering on the realm of sadistic. Rogue grimaced and stared at Kakarot for a moment, like she was trying to figure out how she was going to do it without touching him.

"But he has Kakooties!" she complained.

"Do it." Rogue growled at Mike and muttered a few death threats under her breath as she slowly drew closer to Kakarot. I closed my eyes. I could not bear to watch.

Finally, after a few moments, I opened them again. Rogue was once again in her spot rubbing her mouth furiously and spluttering. Kakarot just was sitting there looking at her oddly. He shrugged picked up the bottle and spun it. We three all inched away from the spinning bottle like we would contract some kind of disease if we got too close to it.

As the point of it came to rest on Bana, the doorbell rang. I jumped up, "I'll get it." I left Bana to her fate and high-tailed it to the door. I pulled it open and then stared at the person standing there. The first words that left my mouth were, "What the fuck are you doing here?"

Trunks and Goten landed next to the deer exhibits. "Which one Trunks?" Goten asked.

"Ummm…" Trunks looked around, "Those two! They look the coolest!" he pointed at two beautiful, black deer that were grazing alone in a smaller exhibit. Goten nodded and the two chibis flew over the wall and into the exhibit. The deer stopped and lifted their heads to stare at the two children.

"Nice deer… pretty deer…" Trunks dug around in a pocket for something. He hand came into contact with two pieces of candy he had forgotten about. He gave one to Goten and they both held them out and coaxed the deer toward them. The deer came slowly but they were used to caretakers so they ate out of the chibis' hands with little caution.

Trunks picked up his deer while Goten picked up his. They flew over the wall again and straight past the sign reading, "Rare Alaskan Red-Tailed Deer: Only found on Admiralty Island, there are only fifteen of these deer left in the wild and twenty in captivity."

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Jeril: Congrats to Rogue, my 400th reviewer!! Here you go!! *hands Rogue a box of Walker's Shortbread™ and Scottish Highland Liquor* It's the least I can do for ya!! Well, despite having three cavities drilled today, I am in good spirits! So… I hope you all are happy now that you've read the chap.

Also, I'd like to thank BananaGirl for offering to read the first section of the chap over and tell me if the game was good or if it needed to be changed. She didn't get a chance to though because she left on vacation. Anywho, I didn't want to make it immature and stupid but when you think about it, the game _is_ immature and stupid. If you think it was stupid, tell me. I need some criticism. My ego's growing too big anyway. *glances at the large, fat, brightly colored sheep with 'Ego' painted on its side* Did I mention I hate sheep? *shudder* Nasty things… Cats are much better. My cat's lying down on a side table beside my desk right now. She says 'hi' to all you people out there. Whoa… this is train of thought. This is what happens when you are nine hours ahead of your normal time and jet lag's messing with your mind.

Muwhahahaha!! According to the poll on my site, Vegeta is the most popular character out of the guys I have listed there! Next is Mirai or Chibi Trunks and then Kakarot! Boo yah!

Kakarot: But remember, most of the people going there are referred by you and you being a Vegeta fan, naturally it would attract Vegeta fans.

Vegeta: Shut up Kakarot! You're just jealous!

Mirai Trunks: Father's right Goku! You're just mad that you don't look as good as we do! *runs a hand through his hair*

Kakarot: Am not!

Vegeta: Are too!

Kakarot: Am not!

Vegeta: Are too!

Kakarot: Not!

Vegeta: Too!

Kakarot: Not!

Vegeta: Too! *they glare at each other for a few minutes*

Kakarot: Let's settle this with a fight!

Vegeta: And the loser has to serve the other hand and foot and eat his boxers! *Kakarot sweatdrops, shrugs and they fly off to find a suitable battleground*

Jeril: *sweatdrop* Men… go figure. Anywho, come back for the next chap and to find out which of the Saiyans win the battle!


	37. Ooo… that's just nasty, man…

Zar and Vicky stood by the side of the exhibit to watch the tigers inside pace. The animals were acting wild and restless, as if they knew they would be getting fresh food soon. Two tigers were snarling at baring their teeth at the children gathered in front of the exhibit.

Zar chuckled evilly and rubbed his hands together, "Oh yeah. This is gonna be a lot of fun."

"Uh huh," Vicky agreed, shading her eyes with one hand and looking for the demi-Saiyans, "Where are they?"

"There!" Zar pointed at the two other chibis who had approached the tiger exhibit from the other side.

The demi-Saiyan chibis deposited their cargo carefully in the pen and then high-tailed it out of there as one large, female feline took a leap at them. Trunks and Goten came to land next to Zar and Vicky amongst the screaming of children as they watched the tigers begin to chase the deer. The group seemed to be split in half. One group was cheering and rooting for the tigers, while the others were screaming and yelling out, "Somebody help Bambi!"

One teenager who looked to be about fourteen climbed up on the bench. A girl of about the same age leapt up to join him. They turned so that they could see the exhibit but still have their faces in view of the majority of the crowd. The boy hissed something to the girl and she nodded.

The boy began his commentary, "And they're off! The large buck runs between two tigers and gets his hindquarters scratched! Ouch! He takes a leap over a bush, narrowly dodges a large cat and then bounds over a stream without a misstep!"

"Meanwhile, the smaller female is using her size to her advantage! She squeezing through spaces that the tigers have to jump over or circle around! She's pretty fast too as she leaps over a tiger! But oh! The tiger breaks her right back leg with a swipe of his massive paw and-"

"The buck is having trouble with two large felines that seem to have him cornered! As a last ditch effort he tries to run between them but-"

"She's down and that has _got_ to hurt!" the girl grimaced.

 "He's out of the game!" the boy winced as he watched the beasts rip apart the fallen, still twitching buck, "Ooo… that's just nasty, man…"

Zar began laughing evilly and soon the other three chibis joined him to create a symphony of high-pitched cackling. A few nearby grownups raised their eyebrows and edged away slowly while the little children's eyes got big and they just stared. A female caretaker who had witnessed the event stalked toward them with murder written in her eyes.

From the back of the crowd, the side of McConnell's mouth lifted up. He chuckled to himself and shouldered his load. Kids these days. No one could predict what the little bastards would do next. He stroked his chin and pondered the strangeness of the fact that two of the troublemakers had flown. That was just a _little_ bit out of the ordinary. He decided to leave it be and turn his attention to another, more important issue. He had a green man in a turban to locate.

Piccolo growled at the air around him. Goku and Vegeta should have never taught the kids to hide their ki! They could have at least waited until they were more mature then their current age! Now whenever the gakis wanted to cause trouble all they had to do was hide their ki and go do it! Piccolo sighed and lifted up into the air. He would have to search for them the old fashioned way.

It didn't take him long to find the place where they were stirring up trouble. He saw and heard all the commotion coming from the area of the tiger exhibit and Piccolo guessed that it had something to do with the human and demi-Saiyan chibis. The green Namek landed at the edge of the crowd and quickly found the four chibis he was looking for as a large area was cleared around them. He watched the chibis cackle with glee as they watched the tigers devour the deer while the normal children screamed in horror.

Piccolo stalked forward to strangle the gakis when he noticed the scientist from before in the back of the crowd. The scientist hefted a rifle-like thing up and he shot Piccolo. The Namek fell back and hit the ground. McConnell ran forward and, with the help of two of his cohorts who had been hiding in the crowd, dragged Piccolo away.

As the tranquilized Namek drifted off into the murky depths of unconsciousness, he thought to himself, _Well, at least those gakis will be able to sense my ki._ But unknown to Piccolo, McConnell, and even the scientists who created the tranquilizer but known to you readers, the drug reacted to his Namek biochemistry oddly, thus rendering his ki invisible for at least forty-eight hours.

The raven-haired caretaker snuck up on the four chibis and grabbed Trunks and Zar by their left ears. "What the hell are your problems?" she demanded, wrenching their ears.

"Ow!" Trunks shouted. He tried to kick the lady but she dodged his foot, "Leggo of my ear!"

"Damn it!" Zar screamed, "We were just having a little fun! That's all!"

"Fun? _Fun?_ You little bastards just killed two deer that were some of the last of their kind! They were irreplaceable! You'll pay dearly!" she wrenched their ears again.

"Let go of my Trunks-chan!" Vicky yelled and bit the caretaker's hand.

"Shit!" the caretaker let go of both the boys' ears. She clutched her bitten hand and glared at Vicky, "Who are you here with?"

"Piccolo!" Goten chirped, "He's tall, green and wears a turban and a cape! He's pretty hard to miss! He should be around here somewhere." The other kids nodded their agreement and they all looked around for the Namek.

"Green?" the lady looked like she wasn't buying it.

"It's the truth!" Trunks growled.

"Yeah, right. And my friend is red with blue hair and walks around wearing a tutu." She said sarcastically.

"They do?" Goten asked.

"Shut up!" the caretaker gestured to another one who had arrived on the scene. The blond bounced over and the black-haired caretaker explained the situation.

The blond nodded and, after the other caretaker left, she turned to the chibis. She took a notepad out of her pocket along with a pencil and had them ready to write information down. She looked at the chibis and smiled, "Okay. Give me your names and phone numbers and since we can't seem to find the adult you told us about, "she gave Goten a look for a moment and he blushed slightly, "I'm going to call them."

"All of them are staying at my house," Zar said.

"And your name and number is?"

"Zaretu Enda," he then recited his phone number.

"Zaretu?" the blond stifled a chuckle, "Enda?"

"Hey! I didn't name myself! I'm going to change my name when I'm old enough anyway." The blond shrugged and turned to Vicky. She quirked an inquiring eyebrow at the girl.

Vicky noticed the caretaker's nametag, "Hey! My name's Vicky too!"

"Vicky Too…" the blond mumbled to herself as she began to write.

"No, no. Just Vicky." Vicky giggled.

"Just-"

"No! Only Vicky!" Vicky tapped her foot impatiently.

"Only-"

"NO!" Vicky jumped at the blond and grabbed her by the throat. She bore the blond to the ground and proceeded to strangle her.

Trunks finally pulled Vicky off when it was apparent that the blond was unconscious. "I think she's had enough," he said.

"Anything for you, Trunks-chan!" Vicky sighed and latched onto his arm once more.

"Why me?" Trunks groaned and buried his face into his free hand.

"Because I love you, silly! Both of you!"

"Eh, I'm sorry to interrupt you two 'lovebirds' but we have a problem," Zar announced.

"What's that?" Goten asked.

"Just where _is_ Piccolo?"

"That's easy! We'll just find him by his ki!" Goten and Trunks closed their eyes and concentrated.

"Uh… I can't find him," Trunks said.

"Me neither," Goten looked worried, "His ki is just not there."

"Reishi's gonna kill me!" Zar groaned.

Suddenly, the group of chibis became aware of two people by them talking. "Know what?" a teenage boy said to his older companion, "I could have sworn I just saw three guys walk by dragging Piccolo."

"You've been watching _way_ too much DBZ lately. I think it's starting to mess with your mind," the girl said. She looked to be in her late teens, maybe early twenties.

"But what if it _was_ Piccolo?"

The girl shrugged, "Well, it probably wasn't. And if it was really him, he wouldn't be getting dragged away by three guys; he'd be beating the crap out of them."

"Yeah, I guess you're right."

"Should we ask them?" Trunks hissed.

"Why not?" Zar shrugged, "What's the worst that could happen?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: Zar is just asking for it!! *lol* Remember: You never, ever say that people! Stuff will happen!! What's gonna happen to poor old Piccolo? Who are those two people? And just who the fuck _is_ at the door? Find out all this and more in the next exciting (hopefully) chap of **Another Boring Day… NOT!**

Where are those Saiyans? *checks her watch* It's been a while and they still haven't come back!

Mirai Trunks: Maybe they both got killed.

Jeril: -_- Now there's a depressing thought. Veggie dead, and by Kakarot's hand too. *sniffles* I'll leave red roses on his grave. *bursts into tears*

Vegeta: *staggers into the room with an arm around Kakarot's shoulder* What're you crying over, onna?

Jeril: VEGGIE! YOU'RE NOT DEAD! *glomps Vegeta and then sniffs him* Wait a second… you smell like… alcohol! Veggie you're drunk!

Vegeta: So? *he and Kakarot collapse on a couch*

Mirai Trunks: Father! How could you?

Jeril: Yeah! Especially with Kakarot! You could've at least brought me along!

Kakarot: Hey! What's wrong with me? Geta and me are good friends!

Jeril: He called you Geta! NO FAIR! If I called you that, you'd kill me!

Vegeta: Hmph! And it'd serve you right too! Only _special_ Saiyans can call me that!

Jeril: Gohan? *Vegeta shakes his head* Goten? *growls* Chibi Trunks? Mirai Trunks? Bra? Pan? *all negatives* O.o;; Veggie… are you… _gay?_ With *choke* _Kakarot?_

Vegeta:  NO!! *vein pops out and Vegeta stands up* BAKANA IKEIKE! HOW DARE YOU THINK THAT OF _ME!_ THE SAIYAN NO OUJI! *forms a ki blast and shoots it at Jeril*

Jeril: AHHHHHHHHHHH! *runs away fast while Vegeta flies after her, blasting*

I've decided to do a little… **Story Advertising:** Cell's Breakout - http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=766714 Good fic about Cell getting out of hell and being put into the body of a teenage girl named Cyris. Cell's personality and memories start to enter her mind and mix with hers. She goes to high school with Gohan, spars with Goten and doesn't get along with Videl. Tis a good fic, I don't think this summary did it justice. Check it out!


	38. Mr I'mtoocoolwithmydickupmyass

"Well, 'hello' to you to, sister dear!" the brunette who stood on the porch exclaimed sarcastically.

"Hiya Bo!" the other twin gave me a one-armed hug, "How're you?"

"But… y-y-you moved out…" I stammered.

"We're back to visit, silly!" Angel grinned. She walked into the entryway and put her bag down carefully.

"No… no…" I shook my head and pinched myself. It wasn't happening. It couldn't have been happening. Ms. Perfect Athlete Alice and Ever-happy Angel were back to ruin my life?

"Yes, yes!" Alice swept into the hallway, dumping her backpack in a chair and then flipping her sandals off. She took a big whiff of air, "Ahhhhh… smells like home!" She was about to make her way to the living room when I cut her off.

"Eh, how are you?" I asked, trying to keep the twins from entering the living room.

"I'm doing good. How are you?" Alice answered.

"Good, good." She moved to walk by me but I sidestepped to intercept her.

"Can I please go to the living room?" she asked, tapping her high-heeled boots on the ground impatiently.

"No!"

"Why not?" Angel asked curiously.

"Eh… because… you can't."

"Listen! I'm going to miss a very important episode of my soap drama if you don't _move_!" Alice pushed me out of the way.

"Here comes the shit storm…" I mumbled to myself as I followed Alice and Angel into the living room. They suddenly paused as they noticed all of the people sitting in the circle with the bottle in the middle.

"Who are all of you?" Angel asked with a pleasant smile. Alice was glaring at me.

"I'm Trunks."

"My name's Bana."

"Mike."

"Rogue."

"Hi! I'm Son Goku!"

Vegeta hmphed.

"Excuse me? What's your name again?" Alice asked, directing her gaze to Vegeta.

"Why should I tell you?" Vegeta growled, taking his cross-armed stance and glaring at her.

Alice glared right back. "Because Mr. I'm-too-cool-with-my-dick-up-my-ass, I'm going to call the police and get them to haul all of your delinquent asses out of my house and right back to school where they belong! Shame on all of you for skipping school like this!"

"Don't address me by anything other then my name!" Vegeta snarled.

"I don't know your name retard so what am I supposed to call you?"

"Shut up, ikeike!"

Kakarot stood and put a hand on Vegeta's shoulder. "Vegeta, calm down. She's trying to make you mad. Just ignore her."

"Oh, I'm sorry Vegetable. I must have mistaken your boyfriend's dick for yours. My bad."

Vegeta glare turned up a few notches and he shoved Kakarot away, "Nothing is up my ass and he is not my boyfriend!"

"Oh, really? Well, you sure smell like something crawled up there and died!"

"Hey! Veggie smells good!" Bana defended him.

"Hell yeah!" Rogue growled, standing in front of Vegeta. Bana joined her. They both stood protectively in front of their favorite Saiyan and glared at Alice. Vegeta smirked from behind them.

"Oh, how manly! Getting girls to fight for you!" Alice mocked him.

"Out of my way!" Vegeta shoved the two young ladies out of his way sending them flying into the walls. Luckily, they weren't hurt. Alice lifted her eyebrows slightly at this display of strength. The Vein was pulsing wildly and Vegeta clutched his fists in rage. "I don't want to hurt you, bakana onna, but if you provoke me I _will_ kill you."

"No fair! Vegeta's never given one of us a death threat!" Bana mumbled angrily.

Rogue held up a hand, "Wait! You think that they're," Rogue gestured at Kakarot and Vegeta, "in high school?"

"Yeah, why? Are they in college?" Alice asked.

"Well, actually neither of them went to school, I think," I said.

"I was privately tutored," Vegeta stated.

"Which means he's a retard," Alice hissed to Mike.

Mike glared at her, "I was privately tutored for a few years."

"I thought you looked like a retard."

"You're a bitch, you know that?"

"Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me," Alice quoted with a smirk.

"I know another thing that will break your bones," Vegeta growled and lifted his hand. He formed a ki ball in it.

"No! You promised, Vegeta!" I yelled, jumping in front of my sister, "And you shouldn't break a promise!"

Vegeta stared at me for a long time and then reluctantly extinguished the ki ball. I let go a sigh of relief. "For this one time, ikeike, I will do as you ask but if that bakana onna insists on insulting me anymore, I will kill her and nothing you can say or do will stop me." With those words, Vegeta turned and walked off.

"Damn it. He wasn't wearing spandex that time. That would have been a perfect ass shot," Bana muttered to herself.

"You know what? For some reason, that confrontation just reminded me of Bulma and Veggie arguing," I commented.

"Don't mention the blue-haired whore's name in my presence," Bana growled.

"Um, Bo? Who are these people and why are they in our house?" Angel asked, eyeing the still tied up and knocked out Krillin.

"Uh… well, they all are spending the night and they're my friends?" I answered.

"Not good enough," Alice turned to everyone else, "I'm sorry but you all will have to leave."

"But you promised you'd find a way to send us home!" Kakarot wailed.

"I will! Don't listen to her. She's a complete bitch. Doesn't have any idea of what fun is." I answered.

"You will listen to me, young lady! I am your older sister and when our parent's are out of the house, I am in authority here!" Alice growled.

"Actually, Angel's older then you so she's in charge," I looked around for my other sister, "Where is she?"

"And where's Kakarot?" Bana asked.

"Do you think…" Rogue started.

"No way…" I wrinkled my nose, "She's gotta have better taste then that! Though they are a lot alike… I wonder… Let's find 'em! I don't want to take any chances!"

"Excuse me," Zar tugged on the coat sleeve of the boy, "Did you just say you saw Piccolo?"

"I think I did," the guy scratched his head through his brown hair, "I'm not too sure now."

"Which way did he go?" Goten chirped.

"That w-" the lady pointed and then paused.  She stared at Goten for a moment while thinking to herself and then after coming to a conclusion she seemed to like from the big grin on her face, she picked up the chibi in a giant glomp, "CHIBI GOTEN!"

"Help!" Goten yelled as she hugged him tight, "Get her off me!"

"If he's Goten… then that must be Trunks," the guy said to himself. He then grinned and said triumphantly, "Trunks and Goten! Aha! Then that _was_ Piccolo! See J'dee, I told you I wasn't crazy! Well, not more then I already am… but that's besides the point!"

"You said you saw Piccolo being dragged away by three guys?" Zar asked, trying to suppress a smile as Goten squirmed around in the lady's strong glomp grip.

"Uh huh. He looked like he was drugged or something."

"Thanks! What're your names anyway?" Vicky asked.

"I'm J'dee!"

"I'm S'rac," he looked at Vicky and Zar, "Are you two from here?"

"Yeah."

"Is anyone else from the DBZ world here too? Like Yamcha?" J'dee looked hopeful.

"Sorry, Goku, Vegeta and Krillin are the only others who have arrived."

"Goku's here?" S'rac's eyes lit up, "Man, he's awesome! I so want to meet him!"

"Well, I'm sure you could if you came to my house after this though I don't think my sister would be too happy. Right now, including ourselves, we have twelve people there."

"Whoa… and four of those are Saiyans…" S'rac's eyes got real big.

"I pity all the cooking you guys have to do," J'dee said.

"Back to our problem, which way did the guys who had Piccolo go?" Zar asked.

"They went through that door over there," S'rac pointed it out.

"Let's go!" the group set off to rescue their favorite, and only, Namek.

Piccolo awoke with a groan. He sat up and rubbed his aching head. _That was the weirdest nightmare I've ever had,_ he thought. _All those fans walking around in bikinis._ He shuddered as he recalled the image of a middle-aged, beer-bellied man making suggestive gestures to him. "That's it. No more Miracle Grow™ for snacks anymore," he muttered to himself. He then looked around his surroundings.

He was in a cage in what appeared to be a lab. He had all kinds of machines posted around his cage and the scientist McConnell was there also. He was humming to himself as he studied what appeared to be a blood sample from Piccolo. Piccolo growled as the scientist turned around.

"Ah! Sleeping beauty has awakened! Is my little fortune hungry?" McConnell seemed to be in a very happy mood indeed.

"'Sleeping beauty'? I find that offensive. Let me out of here, you sick bastard, and I won't kill you," Piccolo snarled.

"No, no, no! You are worth millions! I would never let you go!" the scientist chuckled and took a few pictures of Piccolo, "I think I will call your species the Connells. Yes, that sounds wonderful." McConnell grinned in pleasure.

"I'm a Namek, now let me out!" Piccolo began to power up so he could kill the sick freak… but nothing happened. He howled in rage and bashed his arms into the side of the cage, bending the bars slightly. They were reinforced and were also made of a metal that dampened ki skills. Piccolo was trapped and trapped good.

"Those gakis better come get me soon or I swear to Kami I'll kill everyone in a five mile radius of this facility," Piccolo muttered to himself as he settled down in the lotus position to meditate. McConnell took a few pictures of that. _That baka's gonna be very annoying,_ Piccolo thought to himself as he sunk into the depths of meditation.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: Oiy! If any of you are looking for a Dragonball Z/GT timeline, here's one with just about everything on it! It's really, really handy! I'm so glad I found it! I suggest you bookmark it! http://www.dbzgtlegacy.com/timeline.shtml 

What's gonna happen when the evil sister Alice finds out Vegeta and Kakarot are 40 or so? O.o;; Bo'll be in for it then, ne? Poor Piccolo… he's in a lot of trouble! Well, to answer you Rogue, your theory is right! Vegeta missed every time. Though he did scorch me a few times! *shows her burnt hair and clothes* Bakana Saiyan no Ouji… *Vegeta stands a few feet away, smirking arrogantly*

Kakarot: Vegeta, that's not nice! You could've killed her!

Vegeta: That was the point, baka.

Jeril: O.o V-V-Veggie wanted to kill me? *faints*

Kakarot: Now look at what you've done! *throws water on Jeril*

Jeril: *spluttering* He wanted to kill me! This is so spiffy! He only tries to kill the people he likes! He likes me! He- *Vegeta shoves a gag in Jeril's mouth then ties her hands behind her back*

Vegeta: Blasted humans… *throws Jeril into a box, locks it, ties lead weights to it and then throws it into the sea* Let's see you try to get out of that one, Houdini. *smirk*

**Story Advertising:** Black Flowers – Forced Beginnings - http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=331400 This is an awesome fic! One of my faves! Six youths from the future come to warn the Saiyans of a horrible future that will become their future if they can't stop it from happening. Anywho, the six youths are the Saiyans' kids! **Also:** _This story is rated NC-17 for *cough* adult content. So read if you're old enough too or if you won't get in trouble or caught._


	39. They're making so much racket it's hurti...

"Where are they?" Alice growled, tearing through the house like a hurricane.

"I don't know!" I wailed.

"Do you thinking Kakarot could be seduced?" Bana asked Rogue.

"I dunno… to give the guy a little credit, I think he would do the seducing," Rogue replied. From the living room came muffled yells. "Ah, quit your whining Chrome Dome! I'm not gonna kill you! Just maim you a lot!" Rogue yelled back at the tied up monk.

"Are you sane?" Alice asked Rogue.

"I don't think so. It would suck if I was. Sane people are stupid and annoying."

"Ooookay…" Alice lifted an eyebrow and went to search the garage. Mirai Trunks went with her to help speed up the search.

Vegeta stomped out of his temporary bedroom. "Kami! You people can't hear them? They're making so much racket it's hurting my ears!" Vegeta stomped past us and to the coat closet. He ripped it open to reveal Kakarot and Angel in what appeared to be a very… erm… intimate embrace.

"KAKAROT!" I screamed, "GET YOUR HAND OUT OF HER PANTS, YOU HENTAI!"

"KAKAROT!" Rogue bellowed, "DON'T YOU REMEMBER THAT YOU'RE MARRIED?"

"KAKAROT!" Bana yelled, "QUIT SNOGGING THAT POOR GIRL! SHE MIGHT GET SOME KIND OF DIEASE!" Vegeta smirked to himself. He seemed proud somehow that Kakarot had managed to get a girl into a closet. 

"Wait! You're married?" Angel asked Kakarot.

"Married? Me? No!" Kakarot tried to recover what ground he was losing.

"Kakarot! How could you not remember that annoying, bitchy wife of yours? Does the name 'Chichi' ring any bells?" Bana asked.

"And what about your two kids? Imagine their surprise if they found out their father was cheating on his wife!" I commented.

"Just how old are you?" Angel asked with some suspicion.

"Just a little over twenty," Kakarot muttered.

"Try just a little over forty!" I chuckled.

"Wow! You look good for your age!" Angel said with admiration.

"Thanks!" Kakarot grinned the Son Grin. Angel giggled as Kakarot grabbed the door's handle and closed it.

"What the hell…" Bana's jaw dropped. We all stared at the closed door.

"Okay… I'm lost…" I muttered.

"That's definitely a side of Kakarot nobody ever gets to see…" Rogue agreed.

"Saiyans have needs and we must attend to those needs," Vegeta said with a smirk, "Sometimes one mate is not enough."

"Oooo… is that an invitation, Veggie dear?" Bana asked. We all leered at the Prince.

"Certainly not! You all are too young for me!" Vegeta growled.

"Awh! We don't mind the age gap Veggie!" I grinned.

"Yeah! Really, we don't!" Rogue smiled winningly.

"You girls disgust me." Vegeta stormed away.

Bana sighed, "We were so close!"

"Yeah…" we all went back to the living room and flopped down on the couch and chairs.

"Well, I'm gonna go have some fun," Rogue announced and dragged Krillin outside.

Suddenly, Bana and I heard a screaming sound coming from downstairs and, in a few seconds, Mirai Trunks arrived in the living room. He grabbed me by the front of my shirt and picked me up. "You gotta help me!" he screamed, "Hide me! Anywhere!"

"What's the matter?" Bana asked.

"She… she…" Mirai Trunks' face was pale.

"She tried to jump your bones?" I asked.

"Um… what?"

"She tried to have sex with you," Bana supplied.

"Yeah! NOW HIDE ME!" Mirai howled.

"Hold your damn horses and let me down!" Mirai put me down, "Okay. Why don't you just go onto the roof? She doesn't know how to get up there."

"Oh…" Mirai looked sheepish, "Thanks." The fighter from the future dashed off.

"Alice always has had a thing for guys with oddly colored hair…" I muttered to myself.

"Does she know his hair color is natural?" Bana asked.

"Nope!"

Then Alice arrived, "Where's that hunky guy with purple hair?"

"On the roof," I grinned. Alice ran outside after Trunks.

"You like to play on both sides, don't you?" Bana asked.

"Hell yeah! The only way to live!" I grinned.

"Absolutely!"

Piccolo cracked open one eye and looked at the scientist incredulously, "You want me to _what?_"

"Undress. It's that simple."

"No way."

"You won't even consider it?"

"You're a sick, sick person, you know that?"

"Then I'm sorry but I will have to force you to." McConnell turned to a panel next to him and flipped a switch.

"Nothing can force me t-" Piccolo was struck by a force so shocking that it sent him flying into the back of his cage. He twitched around as the electricity coursed through his body and McConnell watched with a sadistic smile on his face.

After a minute, McConnell flipped the switch again and approached the cage where Piccolo was lying on the floor, panting like a dog that had run for five miles. "Now what is your answer?" McConnell jerked back as Piccolo threw himself against the bars of the cage, screaming obscenities and death threats. The scientist retreated back to the panel and flipped the switch again. This time he only kept it on for a few moments but that was like an eternity for poor Piccolo.

"Now?"

"You hentai. You will pay for this indecency," Piccolo growled as he stripped down. He glared balefully at the scientist as he snapped photos of the nude Namek. (A/N: I know all you Piccolo fans out there are drooling right about now. *lol*)

"How do you reproduce?" McConnell asked as he wrote down some notes.

"Fuck. You." Piccolo hissed and quickly put his clothes back on.

"Ah, ah, ah," McConnell touched the switch and watched Piccolo flinch.

"Fine, you psychotic son of a bitch," Piccolo explained that he was asexual and how he reproduced.

"Amazing…" McConnell wrote all this down and then put the paper in a growing file labeled 'Connells'. He turned back to Piccolo, "When will you be reproducing next?"

"Never. I don't want kids."

"Hehehe…" McConnell eyed the switch. Piccolo paled to a light, sickly green. He realized what the sick bastard that called himself a scientist could do.

"BUT I DON'T WANNA BE A FATHER!" Piccolo howled as McConnell's finger inched closer to the switch.

"C'mon!" Zar ushered the others closer and they snuck down the dimly lit hallway together until they came upon some doors.

"Which one do you think Piccolo's in?" Trunks asked.

"Umm… I dunno," Zar shrugged.

"Let's try all of them!" Goten suggested.

"Awh! He's so cute!" J'dee gushed.

"What's he got that I don't?" Zar muttered to himself as he opened the first door. It was a storage closet. S'rac grabbed a flashlight out of it.

"That's stealing," Vicky observed.

"But we've set forth on a noble cause! To save Piccolo! We need this! I'm sure the people who own this place wouldn't mind!" S'rac replied.

"Okay!" Vicky shrugged, "I didn't really mind anyway."

"Kids this days… more and more corrupted…" J'dee muttered to herself.

Zar moved to the next door and opened it. The four chibis stared inside with wide eyes.

"Wow… that's… weird…" Zar said to himself.

"What're they doing?" Goten asked J'dee who quickly shut the door.

"Umm… stuff…" J'dee mumbled. S'rac shined the flashlight onto the door. There was a sign on it that read "Mating Room: Please Do Not Disturb".

"What's mating?" Trunks asked.

"Ask your dad later," S'rac said and coughed embarrassedly. The group moved slowly down the hallway, having to check every other room as many of them had only numbers on them.

I left Bana watching a Vegeta Special in the living room while I wandered outside to find Rogue. She had Krillin tied to the tree and was burning his clothes while he was wearing them. I watched Krillin sweat profusely while Rogue singed his eyelashes and eyebrows for a few moments. Then I spoke up. "Rogue, won't you get dangerously close to skin while you're doing this?"

"Yeah, but that's fine with me," Rogue shrugged and turned back to Krillin who was screaming around the gag.

"Umm, I was wondering if you could go pick up the chibis for me."

"Why don't you?" Rogue asked as she began burning Krillin's right sleeve.

"Because I've gotta stay here and watch my sisters."

"Why can't Bana?"

"Because she's busy watching and taping the Vegeta Special on Toonami."

"Oh… well, yeah, I guess I can. Just make sure that this guy doesn't escape." Rogue took the car keys and whistled merrily to herself as she walked over to the vehicle.

Mirai Trunks jumped down from the roof. "Take me with you!" he screamed and clutched onto Rogue's arm.

"Okay, okay! Just let go of me, you freak!" Rogue shook the happy Saiyan off and he quickly got into the car.

"Go, go, go!" he screamed as he saw Alice round the corner of the house.

"Ohhh Trunksie! Come back you dead sexy, sex machine, you!" Alice called out and ran after the car.

"Whoa! She's scaring me! A lot!" Rogue said and put the pedal to the metal.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: *swims to shore*Ha! No one can kill me! I'm alive tanx to that screwdriver Rogue tossed me! With the help of my friends, I'm invincible! Muwhahaha- *Vegeta punches Jeril, knocking her out*

Kakarot: Vegeta, that's not nice.

Vegeta: Fine! *splashes cold water on Jeril's face. She doesn't wake up. Vegeta gets his face really close to Jeril's and screams* WAKE UP YOU STUPID, UGLY IKEIKE!

Jeril: *comes to and sees Vegeta's face close to hers* Veggie! I knew you loved me! *clings to Vegeta's neck*

Vegeta: Let go, bakana ikeike! *rips Jeril off and holds her at arms length* Now get to the overview thing so we can be done.

Jeril: *pouts* Oh all right! Fine then… *remembers what the chap's about* You guys think I'm being just a tab bit to tough on Piccolo? Well I don't! So ha! Don't you just wish that Toonami really would air a Vegeta Special? *dreamy sigh* Well… in the words of my muse, S'rac, 'I think Kakarot's been around Rogue, Bana, and Bo too long.' *shudder* Kakarot's starting to scare me… O.o;;; *Vegeta glares at the other Saiyan and drops Jeril*

Kakarot: Hehehe… *satisfied grin* I'm good. *breathes on his nails and polishes them on his shirt*

Jeril: *pats Veggie on the back* It's okay Veggie. It's not your fault you aren't… well, actually it is. You've rejected every offer. I have no sympathy for you whatsoever. *turns her back on Vegeta*

Vegeta: But you're writing the story!

Jeril: *grins* That's beside the point.

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	40. Danger! Extremely, Really, Very, Absolut...

"Lab Number Forty-Four," S'rac read the label on the door for the chibis' benefit.

"Lemme open it! Please, oh please lemme open it!" Goten begged, hopping around.

"Awh! He's just too kawaii! Okay, go for it," J'dee said. Goten bounced forward and opened the door.

The group looked into the lab and gasped. Inside, they saw Piccolo in a cage with wires attached to him and monitors recording and observing his every move. The group noticed a scientist setting up a camera to tape the Namek. He seemed to be very happy about something and was humming to himself.

"That's the guy from earlier today!" Trunks hissed.

"Yeah! That bastard drugged Piccolo!" Zar growled.

J'dee raised an eyebrow. "Aren't you a little young to be using words like that?" she asked.

"Nah, been swearing for three years now."

"Ah… okay…"

"C'mon Trunks! We're gonna have to take on the scientist guy! On the count of three!" Goten whispered to his friend. Trunks nodded. "1… 2… 3!" The two chibis sped through the room and crashed into McConnell. Their momentum, coupled with the fact that he was knocked unconscious and could do nothing to even try to stop them, carried them straight into the wall making a large hole in it.

"Huh!" Trunks stood straight and brushed off flecks of paint from his pants, "Didn't even put up a fight at all!"

"What were you expecting?" J'dee asked.

"Well, like… a long fight. Like the ones Dad has!" Trunks answered.

"Can someone let me out?" Piccolo asked.

"In our world, there's not a lot to worry about in fights. Just guns and a few punches sometimes. It really sucks because of that," S'rac said with a sigh.

"You mean something like this?" Goten asked, opening a drawer and taking out a handheld gun.

"Whoa! Watch where you point that thing!" Zar howled, ducking under a table.

"Hey! Goten! Shoot me!" Trunks called out, powering up to Super Saiyan. The room quaked and things fell off the shelves from the power the demi-Saiyan chibi emitted.

"Hello?" Piccolo was becoming impatient.

"Sure!"

Goten was about to do as Trunks had asked when J'dee jumped forward and grabbed the weapon. "No way!" she removed the bullets from the weapon, "Not while you guys are around me! What if one does hit you and hurt you?"

"But in Super Saiyan form, they can't!" Trunks complained.

"Kids shouldn't be playing with guns! You might get hur-"

"JUST FORGET ABOUT THE GUN AND GET ME OUT OF THIS KAMI DAMNED CAGE!" Piccolo howled.

"Piccolo-sama!" Zar crawled out from under the table and went to look at the lock, "Oooo… this baby's a biggie! And some kind of remote controlled too! I don't think that even I could pick this one!"

"Allow me!" Trunks walked over and raised his hand. He shot a small ki blast at the lock. It was deflected and it bounced into the ceiling, spraying debris and large chunks of ceiling everywhere. "That's odd…" Trunks looked at his hand. "It must have some kind of dampening effect on my ki…"

Zar ran to the control panel and looked it over, "How do I open it?"

"I was drugged when he put me in here! I don't know how to open it!" Piccolo growled.

"Just flip a few different switches," S'rac suggested.

"Okay!" Zar looked at the options and choose a large, red one with the caption "**Danger! Extremely, Really, Very, Absolutely High Voltage! Danger!**" over it. (A/N: What else did you think the gaki would choose? *grin*)

"No! Not that-" Piccolo's words were cut off when the current hit him. He slammed into the back of the cage and began twitching around.

"Oh shit!" Zar yelled.

"TURN IT OFF!" Goten, Trunks, J'dee and S'rac all yelled at once.

"I CAN'T REMEMBER WHICH ONE IT IS!" Zar screamed back.

Goten phased over, "How about this one?" he hit a black button and a screen slammed down around the cage. "Nope," he hit again and the screen retracted.

"This one?" Trunks had come over and he flipped a blue switch, setting off the sprinkler system. He turned it off.

"I'll try this one!" S'rac crossed his fingers on one hand then pressed an orange button. Immediately, lights began to go off around the lab.

_"Intruder Alert! Intruder Alert! All robots locate Intruders and destroy them!"_ a mechanical voice said calmly over the intercom system.

"Oops…" S'rac shot everyone a sheepish look and flipped the switch again but the lights kept on going and the voice kept repeating the message.

"This one!" J'dee said exasperatedly and flipped the red switch. Piccolo gasped as the electricity stopped flowing through him. "Trunks, Goten! You're the strongest! Here's that fight you wanted!" J'dee called out as some android looking things with guns stepped into the room.

"Oh boy! It's gonna be just like that game you have at your house Trunks!" Goten cried out gleefully as he powered up to Super Saiyan.

"Except it's real!" Trunks shot off a few blasts at the robots.

"Here's it!" Zar called and pulled a piece of small rope that was attached to the panel. The entire front of the cage lifted up. J'dee and S'rac went over and helped Piccolo up.

"You okay?" S'rac asked the Namek.

"Do I look okay?" Piccolo gave S'rac a look.

"Well… no… not really," S'rac quieted.

"Okay people! Let's make a quick getaway!" J'dee called out.

"No! We have to destroy this lab! It has information about me in it!" Piccolo argued.

"Where?"

"On the computer and… and…" Piccolo's eyes rolled up into the back of his head and he fainted. The lack of water and stress from the electric shocks had finally caught up with him.

"Ah shit!" J'dee cursed.

"We could get the chibis to use their ki to destroy everything!" S'rac suggested.

"Yeah, but they're too busy having fun! They would ignore us! I mean, just look at the little guys!" J'dee pointed at the chibis who were currently playing volleyball with a robot's head while blasting the others who entered the room.

"I guess you're right…" S'rac sighed, "But what are we supposed to do?"

Rogue zipped through a small space between two cars, turned sharply and slid into a spot. She hit the brakes just in time to stop them from rolling over into a duck pond. She did all this and more to the screams of Mirai Trunks. He had his feet braced on the dashboard, his eyes covered with his hands and was screaming like a banshee in heat.

Rogue unbuckled her seat. She poked Mirai, "Yo, you coming?"

"KAMI! NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, EVER DO THAT AGAIN!" Mirai howled, unbuckling his seat belt and getting out of the car. He held his stomach for a few moments.

"C'mon! Find Piccolo's ki so we can get out of here! I have some torturing to do!" Rogue tapped her foot impatiently.

Mirai Trunks closed his eyes. After a few moments, he opened them again. "I can't find Piccolo! But I can find the chibis! They're all in one area and Trunks and Goten are in Super Saiyan form!"

"That means there's a fight going on! Lead the way, future boy! We don't want to miss the action, now do we?" Rogue prodded Mirai to get him moving.

"Okay, okay!" Mirai led Rogue to a door labeled "Staff Only" and they went through it.

"I always wanted to go back here…" Rogue mumbled to herself as they descended into the belly of the beast.

I was lying on the couch, staring at the ceiling while I waited for Rogue to return. Bana was watching the Vegeta Special with a dazed look and a small bit of drool slipping out of the corner of her mouth. "Ummm… Bana?"

"Huh?" she blinked and looked at me. Then she remembered about the Special and quickly shooting me a dirty look for making her miss a few moments, she turned back to watch it. "What?"

"You're drooling."

"I am?" she wiped off the drool. "I am! Well, who wouldn't drool at that sexy, spandex-wearing Saiyan?"

"I dunno… It'd sure be hard…" I watched the Vegeta Special for a few moments but it wasn't at a good part. "Know what?"

"What?"

"I have decided that Gohan ripped his suit idea and all of his poses off the Power Rangers."

"They do have a strange resemblance…"

"I've also figured out that Superman is just an odd Saiyan with an allergy to green rocks! Those people who think he's from Krypton are just complete bakas!"

"He can manipulate his ki weirdly though…"

"Yeah, well… he's just special."

"You have a lot of spare time on your hands, don't you?"

It was at that time that Kakarot came out of the hallway with Angel on his arm and a very satisfied look on his face.

"Got your 'needs' taken care of already?" I asked, giving my sister a disgusted look. She was pretty nice, a bit of an airhead and always willing to go to bed with a guy, but other then that she was great. At least she was better then Alice the Bitch.

"Yeah! You only took fifteen minutes going about it! Sure you took long enough?" Bana growled, obviously still pissed that Vegeta had turned her, and the rest of us, down.

"Well, I've been promised more tonight so I'm all set." Kakarot grinned, but it wasn't his customary Son Grin. It was more sinister… more evil… more Saiyan-like…

"Isn't my Goku adorable?" Angel asked, planting a kiss on Kakarot's face. Bana made a gagging sound.

"No, no, no. Call me Kakarot, love." Kakarot smirked as he walked off with my sister.

"Okay… did I just hear what I think I heard, or do I need to go see a physiatrist?" Bana asked me, her face pale.

"If you're going, take me with you," I said, staring at the door where Kakarot had exited the room. What was wrong with him?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: Will J'dee, S'rac, Piccolo and the chibis be able to make it out alive? Yes! But how? Will Rogue and Mirai help them? How will they destroy the stuff on Piccolo? Will they notice the pics of the Namek naked? What's wrong with Kakarot? Could the Saiyan in him be making a comeback? Or is sex just twisting his mind? Oh, and those ideas about the similarity between the Power Rangers, Superman and DBZ are my ideas! Don't take them or I'll sic my cat on you! *Jeril's cat hisses*

People… I've come to a decision that many of you will not like. Since school's started, updates will slow down. The average will now prolly be once a week. I'm really, really soory about this.

Kakarot: *stares at Jeril* How could you do this to me?

Vegeta: And me?

Kakarot: And the reviewers!

Vegeta: Who cares about them?

Jeril: Hey! I care about them! 'Sides! It's not my fault! It's the government's! They make me go to school! Damn them! Damn them all to hell! *light bulb goes off over Jeril's head* Veggie, you could kill them all for me!

Vegeta: I think not.

Jeril: Why not?

Vegeta: Because they make you unhappy and I like that.

Jeril: Bastard… -_- 

**Story Advertising: **Trading Places - http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=865717 This is a spiffiriffic fic! And I'm in it! Anywho, it's by J'dee and in it, she and her brother get their minds switched with Bra and Trunks on accident. Then, other people get switched also, like I'm switched with Videl, S'rac's switched with *sighs and shakes her head* Kakarot, and Karienta's switched with Bulma. You can imagine all the stuff that happens because of us being in DBZ! I'm after Veggie, S'rac starts to think he's actually Kakarot, Vegeta fans hound Veggie, and then eh… "Cell" returns!


	41. Do unto others and then run like hell!

Rogue ducked behind Mirai Trunks as a spray of bullets flew past them. "Damn! They must be fighting a war down there!" she said as Mirai powered up to Super Saiyan.

"Yeah! You'll be lucky if you get out alive!" he replied.

"What do you mean by that?" Rogue asked. She got her answer when, with a devilish grin on his face, he phased ahead in the tunnel. "Hey! You bastard! I've got no cover!" Rogue shouted as she dropped to her belly, bullets narrowly missing her head.

"This'll teach you to drive like a crazed buffalo with a stick up its ass!" Mirai smirked, resembling his father for a few, scary moments. A Vegeta with purple hair is not a pretty sight.

"I'll kill you for this, future boy! Just watch out!" Rogue screamed in rage.

"Yeah, yeah! That's what they all say!" With a demented chuckle, Mirai disappeared from view.

"Kami damn teens these days! No respect!" Rogue growled to herself as she began to crawl down the tunnel, G. I. style.

J'dee and S'rac were a bit startled when Mirai Trunks appeared in the middle of the lab. "Hey Zar! What's up?" the purple-haired demi-Saiyan asked.

"Piccolo was kidnapped and we saved him! Goten and the other Trunks are fighting the robots. " Zar explained.

"Well, then let's go!" Mirai was about to pick up Piccolo when Zar stopped him.

"But the scientist people got data on him so we need to destroy it!" Zar explained.

"It's Mirai!" J'dee exclaimed, recovering from her initial shock.

"Wow…" S'rac opened and closed his mouth a few times, struggling to absorb this new data.

"Hi…" Mirai waved slightly at the two new people and turned back to Zar. "So…"

"We've got all the papers piled up, now we just need something to set them on fire," Zar told him.

"I forgot my lighter at the hotel," J'dee said as she patted down her pockets.

"Well, we need to light these on fire some way!"

"I forgot my lighter at the hotel," J'dee said as she patted down her pockets.

"Damn! We need to light these on fire some way!" Zar moaned.

"I'll do it!" Mirai raised a hand to shoot a ki blast but was stopped by a voice.

"Did I hear the word 'fire'?" Rogue stood and brushed off her pants. She looked up again and saw Mirai. "You! I nearly got shot a lot of times because of you!" she snarled and lunged at him. Mirai phased out of her way and she landed, sprawled, on the floor.

"I'm gonna go help the chibis!" Mirai disappeared.

"How're we gonna destroy the papers now?" Zar howled as Rogue stood up.

"Just shut up brat and find me this guy's hairspray," Rogue said, nudging McConnell with a toe.

"Why sh-"

"Just do it!"

"Fine…" Zar slinked off towards the scientist's desk to find the object.

"How do you know he uses hairspray?" S'rac asked.

"Because his hair is like a helmet. Feel it!" Rogue crouched down by McConnell and poked his hair with her finger. The hair stayed put. It didn't bend or even move a little. It just stayed.

"That guy's queer…" Zar said as he handed Rogue the hairspray. Attached to it was a receipt reading that it was bought three days ago. The can was one-third empty.

"Yeah… completely." Rogue shook up the can and took a lighter out of her pocket. She grinned at the others, "Watch and learn." She lit the lighter and sprayed the hairspray through the flame. The hairspray turned into a large flaming mass. "Homemade flamethrower," she smirked.

"Awesome!" Zar bounced around happily and excitedly exclaimed, "I'm gonna steal kaasan's hairspray and do that!"

"Just don't tell your sis who you learned it from," Rogue told him, pausing the spray momentarily.

"I won't!"

"Good," she started spraying again and began flaming all the documents. The glow of the flames cast shadows and light eerily over her face as she laughed maniacally at the flaming papers.

"Can I do it for a little?" Zar asked.

"Sure!" Rogue handed him the lighter and the hairspray can, which was decidedly lighter now. It took Zar a few tries to get the flame going but then he had a lot of fun with the flamethrower.

Rogue started opening the drawers of the desk, looking for more burning material. She found a pile of papers labeled "Cures for Diseases" and she threw those in without bothering to read the title. She just kept on throwing in every type of burnable material she came across until she found a packet of photos. She opened it and gasped. She had found the naked pictures of Piccolo.

"Ooooo boy… I could make a lot of money on these," Rogue chuckled to herself and put the photos in the inside pocket of her coat. Under the photos, she found a wad of bills that were mostly fifties. _I'm gonna be rich! Money and the pics! Today is my day!_

Suddenly, Rogue got a bright idea. "Hey! I'll be back in a minute!" she called to the others. She ran out of the room, dodging bullets and ran down the hallway back toward the way she and Mirai had come in. She stopped at the supply closet that she had noticed. She opened the door and looked over the supplies.

Finally, after a few moments, she picked up a stick of dynamite, a roll of fuse and two two-gallon containers of gasoline. Lugging those behind her, she made her way back to the lab.

When she entered the room, Zar's jaw dropped when he saw the dynamite. "What're we gonna do with that?"

"Blow up the lab," Rogue answered as she began drenching everything in gasoline. "You see, almost all the equipment here has info on Piccolo so I'm thinking that if we just smash the computers, they might be able to retrieve some of the data. But, if we just blow it all to hell, they won't be able to get anything."

"She's right!" S'rac hefted the other can of gasoline. He helped Rogue to make sure just about everything had a little bit of gasoline on it.

"Okay. I'll set the fuse." J'dee grabbed the roll, handed the end to Zar, and then went back out to the hallway so she could make sure the fuse was nice and long.

"Have you realized that people might get hurt when we do this?" Zar asked Rogue.

"Don't let it get to you! They consorted with this guy so that makes them evil! Got that? Evil! Pure and unadulterated evil!" Rogue answered.

The chibi nodded, "Evil. Okay. Evil, evil, evil…" he kept chanting as he put the fuse into the dynamite.

"Brainwashing him, are we?" S'rac whispered to her.

"Well, things like this aren't half as fun if your conscience is getting in the way."

"Yeah, I agree completely." They finished with the gasoline and Rogue helped Zar placed the dynamite in a strategic location that was nearly guaranteed to set the whole place on fire.

"Okay! Let's go get the chibis and then set the fuse off!" Rogue grinned and she and S'rac grabbed Piccolo and between them, they managed to get the large Namek into the hallway.

"Kami! This guy weighs a lot!" S'rac gasped, leaning against a wall.

"Shit! He needs a diet!" Rogue dropped the Namek to the ground.

"Hi everyone!" Goten and Chibi Trunks bounced down the hallway, throwing wires around like party streamers. Mirai Trunks followed them at a more reserved pace.

"I think we got them all!" Chibi Trunks grinned.

"Yeah! You should've seen us going at it! It was awesome! I was like _bam bam! _And then Trunks would pick up one and throw it into the others and then he'd blast them and-"

"That's wonderful Goten," Rogue him off, "and I'd really like to hear more but we have to go now! The real security people might come soon!" Rogue pushed the chibis ahead and turned back to Piccolo.

"I'll get him!" Mirai volunteered and picked up the unconscious Namek.

"Yeah, well that ain't getting you back into my god graces, brat! Just watch your back!" Rogue growled. Mirai paled slightly and then hurriedly ran after the chibis. J'dee, S'rac and Rogue followed behind them at a slightly slower pace.

When they reached the chibis waiting at the beginning of the fuse, Rogue quickly lit it. "This is where my motto comes in handy, guys!" Rogue yelled as they all took off at breakneck speed down the tunnel, "'Do unto others and then run like hell!'" The group bursting out of the door and into the sunlight and a rumbling, blasting noise echoing down the hallway behind them, punctuated Rogue's last word. They looked back and could dimly see a reddish glow coming down the hallway.

"Well, I think McConnell got what he deserved!" Rogue said with an evil grin.

Zar chuckled maliciously. "Absolutely."

"Let's go!" Rogue said and brought the rest of the group to the car. With the chibis sitting on people's laps and Piccolo stuffed into the back trunk, they were able to fit in.

"Oh yeah. One last thing," Rogue said as she whipped out of the zoo's parking lot amid flashing lights of amblances and police cars, "We don't know what happened here today. Right everyone?"

The group all chorused together in a collective "yes".

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: This is out early. Hmm. *shrugs* Anywho… well, SCAV. McConnell got the punishment he deserved, eh? Boy! Rogue is getting very lucky indeed! Money and the pics of Piccolo! She could be a millionaire if she made copies from the negatives and sold them!

Okay, if some of you didn't get what I meant my G. I. style, I'll have my assistant, Kakarot, show you what I meant. *Kakarot drops to his belly on the ground, puts his arms in front of him and crawls forward using his forearms to pull himself along* See!

Vegeta: Ha! Down on the floor like the worm you are, eh Kakarot?

Jeril: Oooo Veggie! I hear you have a dislike of worms! *chuckles evilly*

Vegeta: Of course! They're all nasty, and slimy, and squishy, and stretchy and brrr! *he shudders and hugs himself*

Jeril: Awwwh! Poor Veggie! Here! Catch! *throws Vegeta a jar of worms. He reflexively catches it*

Vegeta: AHHHHHH!!! *drops the jar, it shatters* NASTY WORMS! UCKY! EW, EW, EWWWWWWW! *begins blasting the slimy creatures*

Jeril: Vegeta… you scream like a girl. O.o;;

Vegeta: I DO NOT!

Kakarot: *stands up* She's right, Vegeta. You do.

Vegeta: *the Vein protrudes from his forehead* I. Do. Not. Scream. Like. A. Girl.

Jeril: Fine, fine. You scream like a guy with his balls in a vise.

Kakarot: *winces* Ouch… that would hurt.

Vegeta: DIE IKEIKE! *grabs Jeril and throws her into a nearby dumpster*

Note: _To any of the authors I have inserted into my fic, if I portray you differently then you'd like to be portrayed, please correct me in your review._

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	42. Kami… I need a drink

I sat on the railing of the porch, eating whipped cream from a can and watching Krillin crawl around on the ground with a panicked look on his face. I chuckled to myself as I watched his face grow red with anger, frustration and fear. Suddenly, Kakarot walked out of the house and camped out on the swinging wooden couch thing we have suspended from the ceiling.

I eyed the Saiyan suspiciously. "What do you want?" I asked him.

"Just came out to watch the fun," he answered.

"Fun?" my brow furrowed in confusion, "What fun?

"That fun," he said with a small smirk and gestured toward Krillin. My eyebrows shot up. "Okay. Lemme get this straight. You think that watching one of your oldest friends crawl around, gagged and bound up hand and foot, about to be tortured by someone who doesn't really care if he lives or dies is _fun_?" I choked.

"Of course," Kakarot's smirk widened. I dropped the can of whipped cream on the porch in shock. I stared at the Saiyan as he picked it up. "You gonna finish this off?" he asked and before I could answer he finished off the whipped cream. Kakarot smacked his lips in delight and wandered back into the house, grinning to himself contentedly.

"No… I've suddenly lost my appetite…" I said, staring after him. I sat for a moment, thinking. "Kami… I need a drink." I muttered to myself as I stood. I walked inside to find one and try to puzzle out what the hell was wrong with Kakarot.

When I entered the kitchen, I found Kakarot and Vegeta talking. I had an inkling feeling in the back of my mind that something wasn't right so I concealed myself by the door and listened to their conversation.

"What's wrong with you, Kakarot? You've been acting strange lately and that's not like you," Vegeta accused.

"I haven't been acting strange Vegeta! You're the one who's acting odd! You haven't killed a human yet and you're acting all nicey-nice to them! _You_ are the one whose lost your mind, _Prince_ Vegeta! You're a disgrace to your royal lineage!" Kakarot snarled and stalked from the kitchen as Vegeta stood in shock.

I was also in shock. _The NERVE! How dare that insolent third-class baka insult MY Veggie! THE BASTARD WILL PAY!_ My body shook with rage as I imagined all the things I would do to the Saiyan.

But then another part of me spoke up. _But wait! Have you noticed how different Kakarot's been acting? It started with the Spin the Bottle game, then Angel, and now this._ This was the more reserved and clearheaded part of me, needless to say.

_What's the big deal? He's just been acting a bit off._

_No! He's been acting more Saiyan-like, you baka! Sure, he's had occasional lapses but overall he's been acting more like the Saiyan he is._ I stopped talking to myself so I could digest this information.

Then, it hit both sides of me at the same time and we screamed mentally in disbelief and a little bit of fear: _KAKAROT'S RESURFACING!_

Rogue pulled into the driveway with a screeching of tires and the sound of two cars hitting each other. "Shit…" Rogue scrambled out of the car and hurried to the front of the car. She winced. She had rear-ended Bana's car. "The dent isn't _that_ noticeable…" Rogue said quietly and quickly got busy with trying to figure out a new, more painful way to hurt the conscious Krillin.

"We're back already?" Mirai groaned, looking around for Alice. Vicky had attached herself to his arm again and was grinning happily.

"Where's Goku?" S'rac asked as he and J'dee opened the trunk and dragged out the still unconscious Namek.

"C'mon men! To the fort!" Zar ran up the driveway, up the porch steps and paused on the 'Go Away' mat. He stared at Angel with an open mouth.

"Hiya Zar!" Angel said with a grin from where she sat on the swinging wooden couch. She was lying in Kakarot's arms and he was sucking on her necking, murmuring in her ear.

Zar kept on staring. He scratched his head and muttered aloud, "Something's not quite right here…"

"Tousan!" Goten chirped, running forward to leap onto the couch.

"Go away, gaki!" Kakarot snarled, lifting up his head to glare at his son. "Can't you see I'm busy?"

Goten stopped dead in his tracks and stared at his father with wide eyes and trembling lips. "B-b-but tousan…" he sniffled.

"Do I have to repeat myself, half-breed scum?" Kakarot growled, lifting a hand threateningly. Goten turned and, tears streaming down his face, blasted past Zar and Chibi Trunks and into the house. Chibi Trunks zoomed off after him and Zar was close behind.

"Kakarot! Don't be so mean to your own son!" Rogue said, inspecting some jumpstart cables.

"Goku! How could you say something like that?" J'dee asked angrily.

"Yeah! It's so unlike you, Goku!" S'rac piped up.

Kakarot let go of Angel and stood. "STOP CALLING ME THAT IDIOTIC HUMAN NAME!" Kakarot screamed, powering up in anger. Wind swirled past him, charged with electricity and the floorboards of the porch quaked.

"Whoa! Calm down Kakarot!" Rogue called out to the angered Saiyan warrior as she ran up the porch steps to stand face-to-face with him. Kakarot lifted up a hand and began powering up a ki blast.

"HOLY SHIT!" J'dee screamed, jumping off the porch to the ground below. S'rac followed suit.

"KAKAROT! CALM DOWN, KAMI DAMN IT!" Rogue yelled. Kakarot threw back his head and laughed maniacally as he unleashed the blast at Rogue.

I had just finished explaining to Bana what I had discovered about Kakarot when the blast hit. It sent Bana and I crashing to the floor along with some pictures off the walls and my kaasan's good china. "Shit! What the hell was that?" I exclaimed.

"Ki blast!" Bana yelled and hurriedly got to her feet. She ran to the door and I was only a few moments behind her.

Outside, Vegeta was holding up an arm in a defensive position while standing in front of Rogue, there was a smoking crater in the center of my lawn, two coughing people I had never seen before were crawling out of it, people were staring at us from the street and, most oddly of all, Kakarot was in a stance as if he had just shot a ki blast.

"Out of here people!" Bana snarled, brandishing her frying pan at the people on the street. I could have sworn just a few moments ago that she had not had it. The people fled in fear.

"Kakarot! Get a hold of yourself! You aren't thinking straight!" Vegeta yelled at the other Saiyan.

"No, Vegeta! You are sadly mistaken! I'm thinking clearer then I ever have before! It's like a curtain has been lifted and I can see!" Kakarot threw his head back again and laughed.

"Shit… Kakarot's gone out of his mind!" I said in disbelief.

Kakarot picked up my sister. "And now, I am going to kill all of you, then take my mate here to a secluded spot, do things I've only dreamed of doing to her." Angel giggled at that, "and finally, take over this miserable excuse for a planet."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" I said, holding up a hand to stop him. "You just can't kill us! Vegeta's the Saiyan no Ouji and I'm your… _mate's _sister!" I choked out the word 'mate'. It painted not-so-pretty pictures in my mind.

"I don't care." Kakarot answered, beginning to charge up a ki blast in his free hand.

I thought fast. In just a few seconds, Kakarot would fry us all and then do unjustifiable things to my sister. I didn't really care about my sister, he could kill her for all I minded, but I was really concerned about the former. I was too young to die!

I scanned over our group of people, trying to find something to attack Kakarot with. I didn't think the two people in the crater could do anything, Vegeta could hold him off for a little but he wouldn't last long if Kakarot went all out, Rogue was too weak, Bana was just plain crazy and Mirai would endanger the girl clinging to him.

Suddenly, I was struck with an idea. "Vegeta! Hold him still for a few minutes! I've got a plan!" Vegeta nodded, willing to try anything. He launched himself at Kakarot while I turned to the one person who could save us all from certain death.

Bana.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: *gets dragged out of the dumpster by DeathStorm and TypoNumber5* Tanx guys! *Jeril pulls some noodles out of her hair* Ewww… Gah… I hate dumpsters. Reminds me of the kid in my class who went dumpster-diving for a quarter… *shakes head*

Vegeta: You're still alive? *growls*

Kakarot: Welcome back Jeril! *hands Jeril a towel to wipe dumpster slime off with*

Vegeta: Will you never die?

Jeril: Nope! Never! MUWHAHAHAHA! *throws back head and laughs maniacally. Thunder booms and lightning flashes around Jeril*

Vegeta and Kakarot: O.o;;;

Jeril: *stares at the Saiyans for a moment* I think I scared them… *shrugs* Anywho, soory it took me forever to get this chap out. My tousan took my comp for about three days, then the first school dance of the year was held, and next I found out this guy I thought I liked was using me, taking advantage of my stupid, little, freshman mind and being an overall son of a bitch. Finally, after all that delay, the chap's sections kinda took awhile to figure out and then write.

Oh yeah, I went back and read over the last chap for the hell of it and I'm glad I did cause I saw all kinds of typos that I made. If you reviewers notice stuff like that, can you please make a note in your review? It'd help me out a lot.

Waaaaahooo! Over 500 reviews!!! Beer and champagne all around!! *hands out mugs and glasses* And if you don't like beer or champagne or you don't want any, here's some sparkling cider! *hands that out too* And creampuffs, whipped cream, cake, and apple pie are available too!! *gestures toward a table covered in food which the two Saiyans immediately attack* Well… *sweatdrop* that is if you can get some before the flying stomachs here eat it all.

Wow! The real Saiyan Kakarot is resurfacing! I sure didn't plan this twist when I begin writing this! *glares at Kakarot* Kakarot! You're such a bastard! Poor Goten! You made your own son cry! And now you're trying to kill everyone!

Kakarot: But I didn't do anything! You're the one who's writing the story! *backs away from angry reviewers brandishing pitchforks, flamethrowers, sporks, and lit cigarettes*

Vegeta: Looks like you're not too popular right now, Kakarot. *laughs*

Kakarot: I DIDN'T MEAN IT! *runs away from the pissed-off mob*

Jeril: *chuckles to herself evilly* I thought that cliffie was a nice touch. *grins* You'll have to wait for the next chap! And that'll prolly be at least four days! Oooo, when I'm bad, I'm bad!

**Story Advertising:** Bring Your Father to School Day: Revived! - http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=672445 Another Gohan torture fic but hell! It's a good one! A must read! Gohan has to bring Goku to school and Bulma forces Mirai Trunks and Vegeta to go for some "father-son bonding time". Hehehe! It's great! Gohan gets a voice in his head that calls itself his "Inner Krillin". *lol* And now the fic has been revived and deals with the aftermath of that day!


	43. No, Chichi! Please, Kami no! Noooooooooo...

_(A/N: It gets a little hentai in this chap. If you don't like that kind of humor, you need to seek therapy. (And also skip the sections with Mike in it))_

"Bana! Get him!" I screamed as Vegeta launched himself at Kakarot.

"What? You want me to touch him?" Bana asked incredulously.

"No! Get him with the kami-damned frying pan!" I yelled as Kakarot dropped my sister and turned to fight Vegeta. I figured that since Kakarot had started acting weird when Bana hit him with her frying pan, he would start acting normal again when she attacked him again.

"So I won't have to touch him?" Bana confirmed as she raised her frying pan, "This is Kakarot you know, even if his old self's back."

"JUST CLOBBER THE BASTARD ON THE BACK OF HIS HEAD!" I howled.

Bana rolled her eyes and began to creep up on the unsuspecting Saiyan, "Okay, okay! Kami, Bo! You are _sooooo_ uptight! You should calm _down!_" Bana spat out the last word as she brought the frying pan down extremely hard on Kakarot's head.

Vegeta watched his rival crumple to the floor, dazed and dizzy. "That was a nice hit for a human," the Saiyan no Ouji conceded.

"So you admit you like me?" Bana asked with a cheeky grin, hefting her frying pan.

"No. I do not have an interest in frying pan welding demon harpies." Vegeta answered.

"Why you-" Bana began, shaking the frying pan threateningly at the Ouji.

"Watch out! He's getting back up!" Rogue shouted, pointing at Kakarot. Bana whirled around and administered another blow to his head.

"Take that! And that! And this!" Bana went all out on the hapless Saiyan, smashing his face with the frying pan until he bled.

"YOU WILL PAY FOR THAT, HUMAN IKEIKE!" Kakarot roared, wiping blood off his face.

"Still not normal yet…" Rogue muttered, a whip appearing from nowhere into her hand. She stared at it for a moment and then grinned. She whipped it close to Kakarot's ear, making him jump from the snapping sound. "Down on your knees, worm!" she growled. Kakarot paled.

"Down monkey!" Bana snarled, hitting Kakarot again when he didn't do as Rogue commanded.

"No, Chichi! Please, Kami no! Noooooooooooo!" Kakarot whimpered, getting to his knees and covering his face protectively.

"Kakarot's back!" I announced happily.

"Damn… and I was just starting to have fun…" Bana complained, her frying pan disappearing.

"Who says we have to stop?" Rogue grinned.

"C'mon Rogue!" I said, "It's one thing when it's Krillin. Another when it's Kakarot."

"I don't see what the difference is…" Rogue answered dejectedly.

"Weren't you going to do something to that human involving some cables?" Vegeta reminded Rogue.

"Oh yeah! Thanks Veggie!" Rogue grinned, giving Vegeta a peck on the cheek before he could react. She ran down the porch steps joyously and picked up the jumpstart cables. Humming to herself, she hooked them up to my car's engine and then Krillin's feet.

While Rogue occupied herself with fixing up the equipment for the next session of Krillin's torture, S'rac and J'dee were introduced to the group. "Whose your favorite character?" I asked the two of them.

"Goku," S'rac answered.

"Yamcha," J'dee answered.

"What?" Bana growled, directing a glare at S'rac. "You're a fan of that… that… third-class baka?"

"Yeah. He's the coolest Saiyan on the show." S'rac made the mistake of answering. A low, primal growl started rumbling from Bana. I looked at her and backed away a few feet. She was starting to scare me.

"What's wrong with being a Goku fan?" S'rac asked. "By the way, is he going to be okay?" he looked at Kakarot, who was trying to clean up all the blood off his face and see if any of his teeth were broken. "He took quite a beating."

"Who cares?" I asked with a shrug.

"I do!" he answered.

"Then you drag out the first-aid kit and help him!" Bana said.

"Where is it?" S'rac asked.

"Ummm…" I scratched my head and shrugged again. "I dunno. Find Mike and ask him. He should know where that kind of stuff is kept."

"Where is Mike anyway?" Bana asked, looking around.

Mike chuckled evilly to himself as he hit the download button again. He surfed around Kazaa™ looking for one thing, and one thing only: Bus Bang. He found another few that he liked and downloaded them too.

A voice from behind him made him jump. "Hey, are you Mike?"

Mike quickly minimized the Kazaa window and turned around. There was a guy he didn't know standing in the doorway of Bouke's room. "Yeah, that's me."

"The girl who lives here, I think her name is Bouke, told me you would know where a first-aid kit is."

"Ah, what happened?" Mike asked as he stood.

"Goku reverted to Kakarot and they had to almost smash his brains out with a frying pan to bring him back."

"Whoa… too bad I missed it." Mike answered as he walked out of the room to the bathroom. He opened the cabinet under the sink and grabbed the med-kit out of it. He handed it to the other guy. "What's your name anyway?"

"S'rac. Thanks!" S'rac jogged off to go patch up Goku.

"Ja!" Mike watched S'rac go down the hallway and toward the front door. Mike shut the door to Bouke's room and returned to his computer with a sick smile on his face. He checked on the progress of the downloads, watched a good episode, and then looked at the time.

_It's so early! But yet I'm so tired… _he thought to himself. He glanced over at Bouke's bed, thought for a moment then decided that it was okay. He pulled off his shoes and plopped down on the bed. Mike stretched out luxuriously. _Kami…_ he thought, taking a deep breath. _She smells soooooo good…_

"C'mon Goten! Cheer up!" Zar said, trying to get his friend to smile.

"Yeah Goten! You're tousan was just too busy!" Chibi Trunks added in, trying to help.

"But he's never too busy for me! And he doesn't act mean! My tousan's been purposed!" Goten wailed.

"Is that even a word?" Zar asked, smacking his lips from the spicy treat.

"I dunno…" Trunks' brow wrinkled.

"You know! He's been taken over by a demon or something!" Goten explained.

"Ohhhhh! You mean possessed!" Zar said, finally understanding.

"Yeah! That's what I said!" Goten said exasperatedly, forgetting temporarily about his crazed tousan.

"Suuuuuuuuuuure… anyway! I wanna go down and play on reishi's computer!" Zar said, jumping up and throwing away the now-empty salsa bowl.

"All right!" Trunks jumped up also, throwing his bag of chips at the wall. The chips spilt everywhere. The excited chibis didn't even noticed.

"Awesome!" Goten chimed in, bouncing up to stand on the bunch of bananas.

"Let's gooooooooo!" the chibis howled, running over to the hatch, ripping it open and diving through. The still attic was left a disaster area.

"What's she gonna to him?" J'dee asked me as we watched Rogue inspect Krillin's bond.

"I dunno…" I shrugged.

"It looks painful…" J'dee said.

"So?" Bana asked, earning herself a blank stare.

S'rac was giving Kakarot a sedative while Mirai Trunks held him down. Vicky giggled as she watched S'rac grab the Saiyan's wildly failing arm and stick the needle in. "So that supposed to help stop the bleeding, aid the healing and make him calmer?" I asked.

"Yeah," S'rac grunted in a strained voice, "I hope…" he muttered under his breath.

"I heard that!" Mirai Trunks said sharply as they watched Kakarot go limp.

"Well… at least he calmed down…" S'rac commented.

"But is he gonna be okay?"

"I think…" they watched Kakarot stare at the ceiling with a glazed look to his eyes.

"Yeah… he'll be just fine." Mirai agreed and the two turned and went over to the side of the porch to watch Rogue.

_(A/N: Now I don't know if you can actually do this, but for the sake of humor, just believe for a few minutes that this is possible. And if you actually can do this, kids, please don't try this at home)_

"Now check this out people!" Rogue called out from the driver's seat of my car. She twisted the key and revved the engine. Krillin suddenly started twitching and flopping around, jerking against his bonds. His eyes were huge and rolled around in their sockets and sweat poured off his body like water from a leaky faucet.

"What's happening to him?" I asked curiously as Rogue revved the engine some more, making Krillin shoot from the ground, little sparks dancing over his skin. She laughed insanely and Vegeta lifted an eyebrow.

"I don't know actually but whatever she's doing, it's gotta be painful from the way he's flipping out." Bana added. Krillin's head was lolling around and he was screaming with pain through his gag.

"Is that girl okay?" Vegeta asked.

"She sure doesn't look like it…" Mirai answered.

Suddenly, Krillin gave one last shudder and then lay still, his eyes completely rolled back so that only the whites were showing. Rogue stopped laughing and looked at him, studying his condition. "Awh, damn! He stopped moving!" she growled, turning off the car and getting out of it to stand besides him.

"Oh my Kami…" I said as I realized what had happened.

"Is he…" J'dee choked.

"Yeah! Cue ball's dead!" Bana yelled with glee.

Zar opened the door quietly and peeked in. He saw Mike stretched out on the bed and the computer on. He giggled and gestured for Goten and Trunks to follow him. The chibis invaded the room, making sure to stay quiet lest Mike wake up.

"Let's see what's happening…" Zar muttered to himself as he climbed into the computer chair and maximized the Kazaa™ window. Goten and Trunks picked up a hackie sack and began throwing it around with muffled giggles and snickers.

They all jumped when Mike moaned and, muttering, clutched a pillow close. Zar gestured the other chibis to silence and then cupped an ear and listened to what Mike was muttering.

"Bo…" he groaned, snuggling closer to the pillow, "Kami, you smell wonderful…"

All the chibis burst into a fit of shits and giggles. They rolled around on the floor, clutching their stomachs and trying desperately to keep the noise down. When Mike moaned Bo's name again that set the chibis off once more.

Trunks noticed a camera sitting on the desk. He grabbed it and floated up a little so he could get the perfect picture of Mike and the pillow. He caught the image on camera right when Mike's mouth was forming an "o" as he whispered Bo's name again.

Zar got back into the computer chair and looked at the download section. He noticed one of them was completed. "Hey guys! A movie!" he called out. Goten and Trunks floated over to hover around his shoulders as he started up the movie.

"Whoa!" Zar squeaked as the woman in the video started removing her shirt. "Goten! Cover your eyes!" he barked.

"Gah!" Trunks slapped his hands over Goten's eyes as the movie progressed.

"Whoa… this is awesome!" Zar exclaimed with a hentai grin.

"These are like the movies my tousan watches when my kaasan's not home." Trunks commented as he watched the video closely.

"Kami, she's hot!"

"Hell yeah!" Trunks shouted, forgetting about Mike sleeping on the bed.

"Whaaaaa…" Mike opened his eyes and blinked a little. "Huh? Where'd she go?" he mumbled and then noticed the pillow in his arms. He looked dejected. "Damn… it was only a dream…" he noticed Zar and Trunks glued to the monitor of the computer while Goten floated in the air, covering his eyes.

"WHAT ARE YOU WATCHING?" Mike screamed.

"Huh? Oh! This movie's awesome!" Zar grinned.

"It's the best movie I've ever seen!" Trunks agreed.

"Lemme see!" Goten whined and took his hands from his eyes. He stared at the monitor for a moment and then open his mouth. "Wowwwww…"

"If you guys like that one, check this out!" Mike smirked, taking the mouse from Zar and opening up another movie. The chibis stared at the monitor and made 'oooo's and 'ahhhh's at the appropriate moments. Mike shook his head as he watched the chibis and, with a grin, thought, _I'm pretty sure that the corruption of innocent chibis counts as a one-way ticket to Hell. Kami forgive me for I have sinned._

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: You know what I've realized? This story is pretty much a self-insertion, isn't it? Hmmmm… Mike's such an evil person! Corrupting young children! Tsk, tsk! Well, hehehe, actually corrupting young children is really fun. To see their faces when you tell them how they were created! Gah! I can't believe I mentioned Bus Bang! *hides face in shame* I wish I didn't even know what it was! I had the unfortunate experience of seeing it over at a guy friend's house. -_- Nasty stuff… Damn all men… turning on that kind of shit when a girl is present… bleh…

Kakarot: What is it?

Jeril: Believe me Kakarot. You don't want to know.

Vegeta: Interesting, aren't they ikeike?

Jeril: Not interesting but odd and deranged… very o- *stares at Vegeta* You watch them?

Vegeta: No! *looks away* I don't watch sick human porno!

Jeril: So I _was_ right! *grins*

Kakarot: You watch _porno_ Vegeta?

Vegeta: NO, I DON'T!

Jeril: And I bet you beat off when Bulma's out at work, ne?

Vegeta: THE SAIYAN NO OUJI DOES NOT, AS YOU PUT IT, "BEAT OFF"!! *rethinks what Jeril said* Oh no! Shut up girl before the onna hears you! *covers Jeril's mouth and looks around frantically*

Shrill voice from the distance: VEEEEEEGEEEEEETAAAAA!?!?! WHAT'S THIS I HEAR ABOUT YOU?

Vegeta: Oh shit… *hides behind a reviewer*

**Story Advertising:** Burning Ice - http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=958979 Heh, just a little self-advertising here. It's my first real self-insertion fic and it's got a plot unlike others of it's kind! Yeah! *claps* My bro and I get sent to the DBZ world so we can train to save our Earth from a dimension-hopping, time-warping super villain chibi.


	44. Almost like something from a really fuck...

Rogue started laughing as she realized that Krillin was dead. When she calmed down, she said, "Oh my Kami! I killed Krillin!" and then burst out in laughter again.

"Fuckin' Kami… he's actually dead!" I whispered, looking at the corpse of the ex-monk. I was pretty horrified as a character from Dragonball Z was lying dead in my driveway. I looked around for the raging Krillin fans that I was sure would come running along any moment now.

"What? He's dead?" Mirai asked, with wide eyes.

"Yes! I killed Krillin!" Rogue whooped and began dancing around, chanting 'I killed Krillin' over and over again while we all looked on in amazement. Then, she stopped. "Oh shit! Kakarot's gonna kill me!" Rogue grabbed Krillin by the front of his gi and searched for any sign of life in his glazed eyes. "Breathe! Breathe, Kami damn you! Live!" she shook Krillin for a few moments and then dropped him to the ground. "Oh well… I tried." She stood, brushed off her pants and took off around the corner of the house.

"He's dead?" Mirai repeated. He looked devastated. I guess it was pretty hard on him. He had lost the Krillin of his timeline and now he had lost the Krillin of another.

"Whoa…" J'dee muttered. "Krillin's dead." It was such a shock to people that they just seemed to have a need to repeat it over and over again.

"He can't be dead!" S'rac said. "He's trained since he was a little kid! He is one of the strongest humans alive! To die by the hand of a normal girl who's never trained before is just impossible!" He ran down the porch steps.

"Did you follow that?" Bana asked me.

"No… I think he lost me at the beginning. I zone out when people start talking about Chrome Dome in a good way." I answered as I watched S'rac kneel besides Krillin and check for a pulse.

"He's alive!" S'rac called out joyfully.

"WHAT?" Bana, J'dee and I screamed out simultaneously.

"How could he live through that?" J'dee asked.

"I dunno but if he doesn't get help soon, he might not make it!" S'rac called out.

"We need to help him!" J'dee said.

"We do?" Bana asked.

"Of course we do! He's one of the main characters in Dragonball Z! How could you just let him die?" S'rac asked.

"Easily. Just stand here and watch." Bana said with an evil grin.

"Yeah, he's just Cue Ball. It's not like he plays an important role in the show." I added.

"But what if he's not had Marron yet in whatever timeline he's from?" S'rac asked.

"Is Marron a main character?" Bana asked.

"I dunno… maybe." I mused.

"For Kami's sake! Help him before he _does die!" S'rac howled._

"Okay, okay. We can go put him on the couch." I grumbled.

"He needs to be on something stiffer then a couch. Like a stiff mattress."

"You want to put Cue Ball on my bed? Nuh uh. Not happening." I growled.

"C'mon! Goku will be very angry if Krillin died! Remember what happened to Frieza!"

"Fine, fine. But you'll regret this!" I promised. Mirai Trunks picked up his friend and brought him inside. S'rac and J'dee went also, S'rac bringing the first-aid kit along.

Rogue, Bana and I sat down on the porch chairs. "What to do now…" I muttered.

"What happened to Piccolo?" Bana asked, staring at the unconscious, slightly beaten-up looking Namek lying on the driveway.

"Ah, he just had a bad encounter with a mad scientist," Rogue answered.

"Holy shit! Poor Piccolo…" I shook my head.

"Uh huh. He got electrocuted a few times too."

"Ouch…" I flinched. Some people deserved things like that to happen to them. Piccolo wasn't one of them.

"But I took revenge for him. The scientist is no longer part of this world," Rogue announced with a grin.

"Awesome!"

"Yeah, spiffy… Anyway, I'm gonna go check on how the Vegeta Special's going," Bana said.

"I'll come with you," I said and stood, already recovered from my bought of pity for the Namek. Rogue opted to stay on the porch and watch Kakarot and Piccolo.

When Bana and I reached the television, we found Vegeta stretched out on the couch watching the news. "Hey!" Bana protested. "They were having a you Special on the TV! I was taping it!"

"It had ended," Vegeta answered, not even glancing up at us.

"What are you watching?" I asked, looking at the screen. It showed a chaotic scene. Dogs were leading rescue workers and firemen around to where people were trapped under rubble and some other firemen were working to put out a gigantic, blazing fire.

"Whoa… it looks like 9/11," Bana commented.

"Then what the hell is that giraffe doing there?" I asked, pointing at a giraffe in the background that was getting examined by a veterinarian.

"I think Rogue didn't tell us everything."

"She did a nice job," I commented, examining the flaming debris and terrified animals.

Suddenly, a face popped onto the screen. It was burnt badly, half of it was melted off but the two eyes were rolling around wildly and the mouth gaped open, screaming incoherently. "I swear! Green! Pointy ears! Crazy people! Children! Bomb! BURNING!" the person howled as the camera zoomed out to show the man lying on the stretcher. A medic came over and gave the man a shot, a heavy painkiller I surmised from the slack-jawed expression that next graced the wounded man's face.

I listened in on the reporter who I had previously been tuning out. "Dale Hanover here at the local zoo. They have just recovered the badly injured scientist McConnell from what little of his lab was left. They believe the blast centered from there. The police have not yet determined what happened but they are working hard…" the news announcer droned on.

"Oops… she left a witness," I gulped, recognizing what the babbling of the pain-crazed scientist meant.

"Do you think they'd believe him?" Bana asked me. "If you think about it, just about everything that's happened since they arrived has been pretty impossible. Almost like something from a really fucked up fanfic."

"Yeah. I guess we'll just have to hope that they don't believe him."

"Even if they did, I'd be able to eliminate your puny defenses easily," Vegeta smirked from the couch.

"Kami… I just love it when he does that," Bana sighed. The smirk disappeared. "Awh, Veggie. You always quick to ruin the moment."

Rogue walked over to Kakarot and nudged him with a toe. "Hello? Anyone home?"

Kakarot's only answer was to drool a little as he stared up with glazed vision at the ceiling.

"Just what is so interesting about the ceiling?" Rogue asked the prone Saiyan. She looked up and saw nothing but the wood. She looked back at the Saiyan. "Ooookay… You are majorly tripping, Kakarot. What _is that stuff that S'rac gave you?" she looked around the porch and saw the needle. She picked it up and noticed that half of the liquid was still in it._

"Whoa… this stuff is some powerful shit!" Rogue looked at it closely. She wondered why the look of it was so familiar to her. "I could have sworn I've seen this stuff before," she muttered to herself as she walked down the stairs to the driveway where Piccolo was coming too. "Hello Namek! How are you feeling?"

"Where is he?" Piccolo bellowed, staggering to his feet. "Where is that psychotic son of a bitch? And where's that little shit of a chibi? WHERE?" he screamed in Rogue's face.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Calm down Piccolo!" Rogue held up her hands in defense, one of them still holding the needle.

"YOU'RE TELLING ME TO CALM DOWN? I AM PERFECTLY CALM AT THE MOMENT! I JUST WANT TO RIP THAT BASTARD'S THROAT OUT AND THEN BURN OFF THAT CHIBI'S FACE WITH A FIREBRAND. THEN I'D-" Piccolo wasn't able to finish his statement as at that moment, Rogue stuck the needle in his arm and injected the rest of the stuff.

"Sorry Piccolo. You were just being a little too crazy," Rogue apologized to the Namek who looked at her in shock.

"What is that stuff?" Piccolo asked as he staggered forward, already feeling the effects.

"To tell you the truth, I dunno myself. I also kind of wanted to see if you'd react the way Kakarot did," Rogue said with a grin. Piccolo lurched up the steps and collapsed on the swinging couch. He stretched out then his eyes acquired the glazed look that was mirrored in Kakarot's.

"Fuck… that's some good shit. Maybe I should have saved some for myself… naaaaah…" Rogue dismissed the idea as quick as it had come, "It's much more fun to watch other people act fucked up."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: Gaaaaaaaaah!! Fanfiction.net's taking down the NC-17 stuff! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! How am I supposed to live with my Veggie lemons, huh? HOW? *runs around screaming* THIS ISN'T HAPPENING TO ME!! SOMEBODY KILL ME, PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE!!!

Kakarot: Calm down, Jeril. This isn't the end o-

Jeril: Shut up Kakarot! What do you know?

Kakarot: I know enough to know that running around, losing your composure isn't going to help. You should actually do something about it.

Jeril: You're right! Everyone who's as upset about the NC-17 removal as I am, go to this place and sign the Petition! http://www.PetitionOnline.com/KEEPNC17/ Join the cause! Raise up your voices and speak out against this outrage! Together we can make a difference! Join me and together we will make a new era where lion and hyena live together on the Pride Lands!

Kakarot: *sweatdrops* What the hell are you talking about?

Jeril: Oops… heh. *rubs back of neck in embarrassment* Gomen! Got that part of 'The Lion King' stuck in my mind. Scar kicks ass! *Kakarot just stares at Jeril*

*rubs the back of her neck again and blushes* Tanx Sasquatch for the CC. I really do appreciate it. After reading your review, I realized that I have made Krillin a little bit _too_ weak. *laughs sheepishly* Realistically, he would have been able to break through the duct tape and beat Rogue into a puddle of bloody goo (no offense, Rogue) but at the time I thought up the whole Krillin-torture sub-plot, I was just focusing on making the readers laugh. I do want this fic to be kind of real so within the next few chaps I'll add in an explanation for why Krillin wasn't able to do it. And I have thought at some points myself that I brought in too many characters but I decided that no more will be brought along… well, not permanently anywho. If I do bring another in, it'll only be for the duration of a few paragraphs or a chap, I swear. And I apologize to those of you who think the same of those two points. If anyone else cares to make known to me any other shortcomings, please feel free to. I enjoy knowing how to improve my writing.

Gomen nasai! Gomen, gomen, gomen!! I didn't know it'd take me this long to get this chap out! *ducks a few objects thrown at her* Please forgive me! And it also might take me a while to get out the next one too seeing as I've been restricted from the comp for two weeks! Oh shit! *ducks a boulder* Whoa! Who threw that one? O.o; *is hit on the head with a boot* Ouch! I think it's time to sound the retreat! *turns and runs away*

**Story Advertising:** Burning Ice - http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=958979 Heh, just a little self-advertising here. It's my first real self-insertion fic and it's got a plot unlike others of it's kind! Yeah! *claps* My bro and I get sent to the DBZ world so we can train to save our Earth from a dimension-hopping, time-warping super villain chibi.


	45. The Dangers of Morphine

"Open the door for me, will you?" Mirai asked J'dee as he held the wounded Krillin in his arms.

"Sure." J'dee stepped forward and opened the door then ushered the Saiyan from the future in. She followed along with S'rac. Mirai paused after he laid Krillin on the bed, finally noticing that Mike and the chibis were in the room.

"Mike, what are you…" S'rac's face went blank as he saw what was on the computer monitor.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU SHOWING THEM?" Mirai roared, his face heating up.

"Awh, look at him!" J'dee grinned. "He's blushing! How kawaii!"

"Eh heh heh!" Mike chuckled nervously. He quickly turned off the monitor but betraying noises continued from the speakers. "Nothing! Nothing at all!" he said quickly as he turned off the speakers.

"Sure, sure! We believe you!" S'rac growled, giving Mike a contemptuous look.

"How could you show them that… that… that _porn?" Mirai asked._

"Like you haven't ever watched any!" Mike defended himself. Mirai Trunks' face grew even redder and he deigned not to answer.

"Easily! He just double-clicked on it and wow! I never knew computers could be so cool!" Goten exclaimed with a grin.

Mike grimaced and growled, "Shut up gaki! You're not helping!"

"Hey! What happened to Krillin?" Chibi Trunks asked, effectively changing the subject.

"He got shocked by Rogue," Mirai answered and everyone turned to look at the injured human fighter.

"Ouch!"

"Yeah! That's an understatement!" S'rac nodded.

"Is he gonna be okay?" Goten asked worriedly.

"I don't know…" J'dee checked his pulse. "I just don't know…"

"If only we had a senzu bean!" S'rac lamented.

"Wait a second…" Chibi Trunks' eyes lit up. "Be right back!" he dashed out of the room.

"What's that about?" Mirai asked.

Realization dawned upon Goten and Chibi Trunks returned, clutching a small, gray bean in his fist. "We _do have a senzu bean!"_

"Hurry and give it to him!" S'rac exclaimed, shoving the chibi towards the prone fighter. Chibi Trunks nodded solemnly and, as Mirai lifted Krillin's head to get him at a better angle, gave the human the bean.

"C'mon Krillin! You gotta live!" Goten sniffled.

The human coughed a few times and his eyes came into focus. He groaned and everyone broke out in grins.

"He's alive!" Chibi Trunks whooped and jumped into the air. 

As everyone celebrated, S'rac looked around and his grin faded. "Hey… Where'd Mike go?"

"Huh?" J'dee looked around also. "He must've snuck out while everyone's attention was on Krillin."

"And Zar went with him!" Goten noticed.

"Let's just hope that those two don't plan anything…" S'rac muttered, fearing the worst.

"Hey, Rogue?" I said as I walked back out onto the porch.

"Yeah?" she looked up from where she was poking Kakarot with a stick. He would lie there for a few moments after she had poked him, then lift up his head weakly and look around, as if he had just noticed he had been touched.

"The scientist guy…"

"Yeah? What about him?"

"He's not dead."

"He's not? But how could he survive that blast?" Rogue asked, disappointment ringing in her voice.

"I dunno. We saw him on the television. He was babbling on like the world was gonna end so a medic shot him with some painkiller, prolly morphine and that shut him-"

"Morphine! That's what is!" Rogue snapped her fingers.

"What?" my brow wrinkled in confusion.

"That stuff S'rac gave Kakarot and then I gave Piccolo! That was morphine! No wonder they're acting like complete zombies!"

I eyed the two fighters, "They looked like they couldn't fight even if their lives we at stake."

"They probably couldn't. Morphine affects people differently. It seems that they're the type who get decreased physical activity. It's also probably affecting them differently then it would us as they're not of our species. Saiyans are close but Nameks…" Rogue let out a deep breath and shook her head. "Only Kami knows how it's gonna effect him!" she jerked a thumb at Piccolo who was hovering a few inches off the swinging couch and staring at nothing with wide eyes.

"Whoa… he's taking it not too well." I stared at the Namek as a bead of sweat rolled down the side of his face. It was followed by another, and then another, and another. Soon, his entire face was slick with wetness and he was gasping for breath, his eyes growing bloodshot. "Do you think he'll be all right?" I asked Rogue, eyeing the Namek with more then a little worry. I didn't know that the same question was being asked at the same moment in another room.

"Ummm… I have no idea…" she prodded Kakarot once more with the stick. This time, he jumped to his feet and looked around wildly. "Hey! Kakarot? You okay?"

"Whaaaaa…" he looked at us with unfocused eyes and then screamed shrilly.

"What's the matter Kakarot?" I asked, grabbing his arm.

"LEGGO O' ME!" he screamed and ripped his arm out of my hand which sent me flying across the porch and into the yard. "PENGUINS!" he screamed. "THEY'RE EVERYWHERE!"

I sat up and stared at the tripping Saiyan. "Wow… that stuff messes with Saiyans pretty bad…" I mumbled as I watched Kakarot rub his arms and stare around with a crazed look, muttering to himself about penguins, geckos and mad cows.

"Calm the fuck down, Kakarot!" Rogue snapped at Kakarot, summoning her whip out of the air once again. 

"You're in league with them, aren't you?" he asked, his voice getting low and his eyes looking more and more like someone who was entrenched in a conspiracy theory of their own making.

"Ummm… no…" Rogue looked a little confused for a moment then she grinned mischievously. "I'm in league with the Forces of Evil, AKA, the W.W.W.S.O.T.A.!"

"Nani?" Kakarot and I said at the same time in the same confused tone.

"Women Wielding Weapons Summoned Out of Thin Air! Now down on your knees!" Rogue cracked the whip and laughed maniacally.

"Oh Kami…" I sweatdropped as I watched Rogue make Kakarot do tricks. I shook my head and then paused. "Wait a damn second… I… I… I SWEATDROPPED!" I jumped to my feet. "MIIIIIIIIIIIIIKE!!!!" I took off running for the back entrance of the house.

Angel shook her head as she picked up her bags in the entryway. She moved out of the way as the flame-haired man walked by. She admired his perfectly formed ass for a few moments then turned to leave the house. Things were just getting a little too strange around her old home. She thought she had found the perfect guy in that Kakarot fellow but then he had gone all psychotic on everyone. Amidst the chaos and turmoil of his fight with the others, Angel had slipped away quietly to collect her things and leave.

"Angel!" Alice bounced into the room. "Leaving so soon?"

"Yeah… it's getting way to wacked around here." Angel hefted her bag.

"You still want that Kakarot guy?"

"Yeah! He's one sexy hunk" she sighed. "But I don't think I could get him…"

"Never fear! I have a plan that will get both of us our men!" Angel's eyes lit up with interest and she put down her bags and listened to her sister as Alice began to outline her grand master scheme.

Little did the twins know that Bana was lying on the couch, listening to every word they spoke. Bana listened with a solemn look on her face. She was not pleased with Bo's relatives. No one but Dragonball Z fans were allowed to pursue a character from the show. It just wasn't right.

After a few moments, the Vegeta fan rolled off the couch silently and then snuck to the back door. She was going to find help from Rogue. The twins must be eliminated. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: *walks in wearing a shirt that reads 'Get High' on the front* Now people. I am completely and utterly serious and sincere in this announcement. *clears throat* _In no way whatsoever does this fic promote drug or alcohol abuse. All references to such materials is made for humor purposes only._ Thank you for your time. *turns around and walks away, the back of the shirt reading 'Go Rock Climbing'*

I have only one thing to say to **The curses**: _This is my fic and I can do whatever I damn well please._ So either don't read it, or don't get on my ass about it.

Arigato to TypoNumber5 who I *cough* _borrowed_ *cough* the W.W.W.S.O.T.A. idea from! I hope you don't mind!!!

Gomen that it took me so long to get this chap out. I was able to steal the network card back from my tousan but then the Internet crashed. Grrrrrrs… Life isn't fair! Wow… I've been working on this fic for forever… *sits and stares at the comp for a few moments* I'll be sad to see it go and that should be soon… *sniffles, wipes a tear from her eye* Only ten or so more chaps left… *sniff* Well… who here is actually gonna be _glad_ that it's gonna end?

Vegeta: I will!

Jeril: What? That's so mean of… *notices it's Vegeta* Veggie-chan! *glomps the Saiyan* I've missed you! What happened with Bulma?

Vegeta: I was able to convince her a certain human female *glares Jeril who is latched onto his waist* was lying.

Jeril: Ah c'mon Veggie! Why don't you dump that bitch and run away with me? You know you want to!

Vegeta: *stares at Jeril for a few moments then bursts out laughing* Run away… with you? *gasps for breath* Too funny!

Jeril: *sniffles and bursts into tears* You're so mean!!

Vegeta: *growls loudly* Stop staining my spandex!

**Story Advertising:** The Second Soul - http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=384857 Really good fic by Teekoness. It's been completed but it's still one of my faves. Well, in the fic, Goku, Gohan, Vegeta, Trunks, Goten and Krillin are on a spaceship, training. It starts out with Goku in the gravity room, looking for food. Unfortunately he drops a banana, steps on it, slips and gets knocked out. This bring the old Kakarot back. It's a really good fic and I don't think I did a good job explaining it here. -_-


	46. Update: Not a Real Chap

WARNING: Not a real chap. More of an answer to the question that's on everyone's minds. "Just where the hell has Jeril been all this time?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Vegeta: Where is that baka of an onna? It's been over a month! *crosses his arms and glares at nothing in particular*

Kakarot: I know… I wonder what's kept her so long…

Jeril: *appears out of nowhere and exclaims loudly* Ossu everyone! *Vegeta's eyes roll back in his head and he passes out* Oops… I think I scared him…

Kakarot: Jeril! *gives the unwilling girl a hug* Where have you been?

Jeril: One word: school.

Kakarot: Is it that bad?

Jeril: Worse… -_- Stupid teachers assign too much damn homework and the English class has been leaching away all my creativity…

Vegeta: *opens his eyes and stands back up* ONNA! WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR?

Jeril: Nice to see you too Veggie! Have you missed me?

Vegeta: Not one bit!

Jeril: *sniffles* Okay… well, I haven't missed you that much either. I was too busy drooling over Vash, Legato and Knives! *drools*

Vegeta: What? Who are these people?

Jeril: Some of the sexiest anime characters I have come across in my time! Never mind that Knives is crazy and Legato's one sick son of a bitch. They're hot! And Vash! He's unbelievably naïve and innocent yet not! Kami! *swoon* And they're all from the same anime too! Trigun! Awesome anime! I highly recommend it! *taps on the monitor screens and eyes the reader* Did you hear me? It's good!

Vegeta: Why are you drooling over them and not me?

Jeril: Well, because I'm downloading Trigun episodes right now and not DBZ. Gomen Veggie! I didn't know that you missed my drool so much.

Vegeta: *Kakarot snickers and Vegeta glares at him* Such up baka!

Jeril: And then there's Spike from Cowboy Bebop. He's not necessarily hot but he's still-

Vegeta: SHUT UP ONNA AND GET TO WORK ON THE NEXT KAMI DAMN CHAPTER!

Jeril: *hides a grin behind a hand* Hai!

**P.S.** _I'm having horribly bad writer's block so if you people would be so kind as to send me any ideas you had concerning my fic that you think are okay, I would be really indebted to ya. Well, arigato and laters!_

And while I'm around why don't I do a little…

**Story Advertising!** Vejita vs. Vegeta - http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=988854 Damn!!! This has _got_ to be one of the most original ideas I have ever come across!! There's threee chaps right now but that's okay because I know this is gonna be an absolutely kick-ass fic! Written by one of my reviewers, SCAV, this fic is about an A/U Vejita where that lovable Saiyan Prince is just about to take over the galaxy. Then, he suddenly gets transported to the DBZ universe! What's gonna happen when Vejita meets Vegeta? Eep! *gasp* I CAN'T WAIT TO FIND OUT!! *Jeril's face is glued to the monitor of her comp*


	47. Kakarot fans are all crazy, sick psychop...

"Mike! Mike! Mike! Mike!" I kept calling out his name as I breezed through the house.  I searched high and low for my old friend. In the garage, in the kitchen where Alice and Angel were hunkered over some plan of some sort, in the living room, in my room, I even looked in Vegeta's bedroom! Luckily, Vegeta was in the bathroom so he did not catch me rifling through his underwear drawers. Hey! Mike could fit in one of those drawers! I swear!

Finally, I found the missing man in the attic with my chibi brother. "What's wrong?" Mike asked, a worried expression on his face. "I heard you yelling. What's the matter?" he moved over to be closer to me.

_Ah, how kawaii! He's worried about me! I thought but then exclaimed, "I sweatdropped!"_

"What? You seriously sweatdropped? Anime-style?" Mike questioned.

"Yeah! A big sweatdrop just rolled down the side of my head!"

"Cool!" Zar exclaimed.

"This is messed up Mike! First, Rogue and Bana begin to pull objects out of thin air and now I can sweatdrop!"

Mike thought for a moment. "I think the anime characters must be affecting our reality… Like… warping it somehow…"

"Awesome! We'll soon be living an anime!" Zar crowed.

"Yes!" I pumped my fist in the air, "Spiffy!"

"I don't know for sure though… I'll have to do a few tests to be positive…"

"Like what?" I asked.

"Uh… I dunno really…" Mike shrugged.

"What're you guys doing up here anyway?"

"Nothing really. Just chilling."

"Oh, okay… well, I'm going. Ja!" I jumped down to the laundry room and danced around. "I'm gonna be an anime character! This is awesome! I'm sooooo happy!"

"What?" Rogue was surprised. "Those sissy twins have the guts to make a plan to capture Mirai and Kakarot then make off with them?"

Bana nodded grimly. "Yep. Those damn bakas are going after the Saiyan males."

"They don't deserve them!" Rogue growled.

"Yeah, they don't know anything about the series! It's blasphemy!" Bana snarled.

"We'll have to teach them a lesson…" Rogue cracked her whip. Beside her, curled in a ball on the porch, Kakarot began to shiver uncontrollably. Piccolo on the other hand, was stretched out on the swinging couch, sweating and drooling, his eyes rolling around in his head.

"How much longer are they going to be out like that?" Bana asked, studying the two anime characters warily.

"Who knows? Morphine usually lasts 4-5 hours on a human so it may go that long for Kakarot, maybe longer or shorter but I dunno about the Namek. He may be out of it for days…"

"That might end up becoming a problem…" Bana mused.

"Yes, but let's deal with the bigger problem! These brunette whores who think they can take Kakarot and Mirai instead of the fans who deserve them and have written hundreds of fanfics about them!"

"Let's just save Mirai and let them have Kakarot."

Rogue chewed on her lip.

"Would it be all that bad?"

Rogue thought for a moment.

"Think! Vegeta would be the strongest Saiyan on Earth!"

"What about Gohan?"

"Oh yes. Kakarot's first brat… I forgot about him."

"Well, we should save Kakarot too. I don't think Vegeta would be too happy with us. He'd loose his sparring partner and think of all the mad Kakarot fans that would hunt us down and kill us." Rogue shuddered at the thought.

"Yeah, knowing their sick, twisted minds they'd probably prolong our death too."

"Yes. Kakarot fans are crazy, sick psychopaths. All of them."

"So we're taking the two bitches out?" Bana's frying pan appeared in her hand.

Rogue grinned and cracked her whip. "Yup. What else could we do?"

Bana turned her head to look at the now glazed eyed Kakarot. A devilish grin spread across her face. She turned to look back at Rogue. Rogue was also grinning evilly. Bana chuckled. "You thinking what I'm thinking?"

"Absolutely. I'll get the rope."

"And I'll get the duct tape."

"And that's the plan!" Alice finished up.

"So we tempt Kakarot out to the car with whipped cream, knock him out, and tie him up. Then, we hunt down that Trunks guy, overpower him, knock him out, drag him out to the car, tie him up and make our getaway?" Angel summarized. (A/N: Overpower him? *snicker* Ain't they stupid? *sigh* What a simple and so… idiotic a plan)

"Exactly!"

"Let's get going!" they turned and walked out of the kitchen and into the living room. There, they saw Kakarot lying on the couch with no one around.

"Kakarot!" Angel squealed and pounced on 'her' man. She began covering his face with kisses. Luckily for her, he was tied up or else he probably would have killed her, claiming she had gone over to 'the Dark Side' and was in league with 'the Birds spawned of Evil Incarnate'.

Behind Alice, Rogue slipped out of the shadows and, with an expert flick, wrapped her whip around the girl's ankles, effectively hobbling her. She gave a sharp tug to bring the girl crashing to the ground.

Bana snuck up behind Angel with her frying pan at the ready. All she needed to do was bring it smashing down on the brunette's delicate head to send Angel flying into the land of unconsciousness. And she did so with an evil grin.

"That was remarkably easy…" Rogue said disappointedly, glaring at Alice.

"I thought they'd put up a better fight…" Bana agreed.

"Well, they are just _mere humans after all," Vegeta added as he walked into the room, "but, you two did well for humans with such weak kis."_

"Arigato Veggie!" Bana grinned.

"Yeah, thanks!" Rogue smirked, eyeing the Saiyan no Ouji in his spandex.

Muffled cries came from Kakarot as he struggled to shove Angel off. He seemed to have forgotten that he could break the rope easily. Rogue sighed and took out a knife. Kakarot's eye bulged out of his head, his cries became even more strangled, and more like screams. "Relax Kakarot. I'm not gonna hurt you. Thought if you're head continues to jerk around like that, the blade might _accidentally_ slip."

Kakarot lay still as Rogue cut his bonds. Then, once he was free, he shoved Angel off and stood up, rubbing his arms were the rope had cut into his skin. "Thanks Rogue!" Kakarot grinned.

"Wait… Kakarot, are you back to normal?" Bana asked suspiciously.

"What? Back to normal? Have I ever not been?" Kakarot put a hand behind his head and laughed.

"Damn it…" Rogue growled.

"Hey Vegeta!" Kakarot grinned, "Where is everyone?"

"Taking care of your bald friend," Vegeta replied.

"What happened to him?"

"He had a bad run-in with a car battery," Bana explained. Rogue smiled at the memory.

"Oh man. Is he gonna be okay?" Kakarot's question was greeted with a few moments of silence.

"Do we look like we care Kakarot?" Vegeta asked.

"Ummm… well, I assumed…"

"Last I heard, he was dead," Rogue said with a smirk.

"WHAT? DEAD?" Kakarot screamed. "WHOEVER KILLED HIM IS GOING TO PAY! DEARLY! I'LL DUNK 'EM IN HOT TAR AND THEN I'LL RIP THEIR HEAD OFF AFTER I RIP OFF THEIR ARMS AND LEGS!"

"Shit…"

"He's not dead!" Bana spoke up.

"Okay, good." Kakarot took a deep breath.

"Just severely injured," she added.

"Who. Hurt. Him?" Kakarot growled.

"Ummm… I don't really remember at the moment…"

"_Who?"_

"Mike!" Rogue said.

Kakarot nodded and closed his eyes to search out the teenager's ki. Then he set off with purposeful steps to find, and punish, the person who had, supposedly, hurt his friend.

Vegeta, Bana and Rogue burst into a fit of laughs after Kakarot was out of earshot.

Vegeta slapped Rogue on the back. "You should've been born a Saiyan, girl. You would have made a good one."

A loud scream echoed through the house. This set the three to laughing even more.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: Ossu everyone! How are all of you? _I finally got a chap out!_ Aren't I proud?

Vegeta: *sighs* Just shut up onna and leave already. It was a lot quieter and more peaceful without you here.

Kakarot: Noooo! Don't leave Jeril! It's boring without you!

Jeril: I am happy to announce that I have no plans to go anywhere for a very long time! Yup! No trips, no nothing and I am going to update my fic (hopefully) every week from now on! Gomen nasai if the humor in this chap wasn't all that good. I'm trying to get back into the swing of writing this fic (due to my long absence I'm a little rusty) and so I might not be up to standard completely for the next chap or two. One again, gomen domo all.

**Story Advertising:** Split Ends - http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=815420 Veggie humor fic!! Kakarot co-stars but that's besides the point! Anywho, in this fic, Vegeta gets taken over by his other personality, Eddy. Eddy is the complete opposite of our beloved Saiyan no Ouji and proceeds to make a fool of him by doing *gulp* _nice things_! Like making Bulma, Trunks, and Mirai breakfast, vacuuming the house, and he even calls Kakarot _Kaka-chan_! My Kami! It's too horrible to speak of! Read the fic to find out the rest of the horrific (yet insanely funny) story that unfolds!


	48. What?

"Well, what should we do with the two culprits?" Rogue asked, eyeing the twins. They had tied them up with the rope that was formerly used on Goku.

"We could just kill them," Bana suggested.

"Or we could tie them to the car and drive down the highway with them trailing behind us!"

"And tar n' feather them!"

"And then boil them in hot oil!" The two girls whimpered as they listened to the growing list of possibilities. However they were going to be punished, it was obviously not going to be pleasant.

Vegeta just smiled to himself and stretched out on the couch to take a nap.

"Wait! I have an awesome idea!" A little light bulb went off by Bana's head.

"Whoa! Check it out!" Rogue pointed at the light bulb.

Bana turned her head and looked at the flashing bulb. "Holy shit! That's awesome!" She stared at it for a bit and then the light bulb flashed brighter. "Oooo! Nifty!" Bana reached out and grabbed a string that hung from the bottom of it. She pulled the string and a small "click" was heard. The light went off. Bana's face grew slightly shocked.

"What's the matter?" Rogue asked.

"It's gone! The idea's gone!" Bana exclaimed and clicked the light bulb again. It came back on. "It's back! Spiffy!"

-click- "It's gone!"

-click- "It's back!" Rouge sweatdropped.

-click- "It's gone!"

-click- "It's-"

"Enough with the light bulb already!" Rogue growled and grabbed the light bulb out of the air. Sparks flashed around her hand and she let out a little squeak and let go of the light bulb.

"Hah! You can't steal my idea! Or else that would be..." Bana pointed at a few letters flashing above the light bulb, "plagiarism!!"

Rogue looked at Bana with one of those 'tell-me-what-you-are-thinking-or-I-will-kill-you' looks.

"Fine, fine..." Bana explained her plan to Rouge.

"Nice! Let's do it!" Rouge chuckled.

"You go find Kakarot and I'll watch the two prisoners!" Bana said as she checked to make sure the twins' bonds were secure.

"Right ho!" Rogue wandered off to find the aforementioned Saiyan.

Bana ran to the kitchen and grabbed a bunch of bananas. Then, she returned to the living room and began marching in a circle around the twins, munching on her bananas happily and throwing the peels over her shoulder, not really giving a damn where they landed.

I hummed to myself happily as I skipped my way through the house. Nothing could ruin my day. Nothing at all. It was just too perfect. My world was going to turn into an anime world! Everything was wonderful. "Life is my friend!" I yelled out suddenly. "I love everything!" I pulled open the door and skipped out onto the porch.

I noticed Piccolo still sitting on the porch, all alone. "Hiya Piccolo! What up? I love everything! Everyone is my friend! That includes you!" I grinned stupidly.

Piccolo looked at me oddly. "What?" he asked, his face twisted into a look of complete confusion.

"Dance with me Piccolo!" I giggled and grabbed the Namek's hands.

"What?" he stared at me bewildered.

"Dance!"

"What?"

"DANCE PICCO, DANCE!" I exclaimed happily. Some kids playing across the street whispered to themselves and retreated into their house.

"What?"

"Grrrrs…" I glared at the Namek, "You're no fun, pickle…" I slinked back into the house with my mood dampened considerably.

"What?" Piccolo asked the empty air and there was no reply.

"Man, I'm hungry!" Zar announced as he and Mike climbed down from the attic.

"Yeah, I wonder what we're having for dinner…" Mike mused as they entered the hallway.

"Mike…" a low growl came from behind the two humans.

"What the…" Mike started as he turned around and saw a very pissed-off looking Goku stalking toward him.

Goku picked Mike up by the throat. "You hurt Krillin, didn't you?" the enraged Saiyan snarled.

"Me?" Mike rasped, clawing at Goku's hand and fighting for breath.

"Hey! He's turning purple!" Zar exclaimed excitedly, watching Goku squeeze Mike's throat.

Mike made an odd sort of choking sound.

"What did you say?" Goku growled.

Mike choked again.

"I don't think he can breathe, let alone talk," Zar remarked.

Goku let up on his grip on Mike's throat a bit and Mike sucked in a deep breath. "Now what did you say?"

"I didn't hurt Krillin!" Mike gasped.

"Well, who did?"

"Rogue!"

"But she told me you were the one who hurt him."

"Goku, never, ever believe a thing a female tells you. It'll either kill you, or land you in trouble," Mike answered, looking at Goku squarely in the eyes.

"Oh Kakarot! There you are!" Rogue called out as she came across the Saiyan standing with Mike and Zar, " Come on! Bana and I need your help!"

"Why should I help you? You hurt my friend and nearly killed him!" Goku asked accusingly.

"Well, seeing as you're such a nice guy and all, I was thinking you'd just help us out a bit. After all, I _almost killed him. Frieza did kill him, and you gave that gay bastard a second chance. Why not me, ne?" Rogue asked with a grin._

"Ummm… well, you are kinda right…" Goku mumbled, "I guess I will give you another chance. But if you hurt Krillin one more time…" the black-haired warrior left the statement hanging and lifted his hand threateningly.

"I got cha! No more hurting Krillin. I can do that!" Rogue nodded and then muttered to herself, "With a little bit of luck… Now come help us!"

"What do you need help with exactly?" Goku asked as he followed Rogue back to where Bana guarded the prisoners.

"We need your Instant Transmission actually."

"Why?"

"We need to move a few things," Rogue grinned.

"What kind of things?"

"Living things."

"Oh, okay!" Goku said cheerfully as they entered the room where Bana stood watching the twins.

"Rogue, I've been thinking and I've discovered a flaw in my plan," Bana informed Rogue.

"What? What flaw?"

"Kakarot locks onto kis when he uses the technique. We don't know a ki he can use."

"Dammit!" Rogue growled, "And I really wanted to send those bitches to a remote place in Africa…"

A little light bulb flashed by Bana's head again, "We could still do it though! He just has to look for a place with not a lot of people and in the general area of Africa, I guess."

"Can you do that Kakarot?" Rogue asked the Saiyan.

"Yeah, I think so. But why are we sending them to this Africa place?" Goku asked.

"Because they'll like it there!" Bana grinned. The twins' eyes widened and they started to shake their heads violently and talk around the banana peel gags Bana had shoved in their mouths.

"But then why are they gagged and tied up?"

"Ummm… never mind that. It's a moot point. Just find a sparsely populated part of Africa."

"Okay…" Goku put his fingers to his forehead and closed his eyes in concentration. Then he opened them again. "Um, which way is Africa?"

"Oh… umm…" Bana shrugged and pulled out a banana to eat, "I dunno."

"That way," Rogue pointed.

"Thanks!" Goku closed his eyes again.

"No problem…"

Goku's eyes snapped open. "Found a place!"

"Let's check it out first, Rogue. To see if it's a nice place."

"Right." Rogue grabbed Goku's shoulder and Bana grabbed the other. "Take us there first, Kakarot."

"Okay!" Goku closed his eyes one more time and the three shimmered and then disappeared.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: Jeril: I'm ashamed that it took me so long to get this out. I'm so sorry everyone. Very sorry. I hope everybody didn't give up on me…

Vegeta: Everyone left a long time ago.

Kakarot: Yeah… you did take a long time updating.

Jeril: I'm sorry! To make it up to all of you, well, all of the Vegeta fans, I'm gonna have a Special Vegeta chap in a bit involving the Saiyan Prince and his obsessed fans in one room for one whole night. ^_~ Crazy stuff.

Vegeta: Wait a minute! I didn't consent to this!

Jeril: I don't need your consent! :P Hah! *runs away*


	49. Bouke, stop molesting his poor feet

I made my way through the house, looking for a group of people who I had noted was missing. I came across them all in my room. "How be you Krillin, old chap?" I asked the hairless monk as I entered my room.

"Better, no thanks to that Rogue demon," he growled and returned to the Monopoly(tm) game he was playing with the two demi-Saiyan chibis.

"She just got a little carried away..."

"A little?" S'rac quirked an eyebrow at me from where he stood behind Mirai, "If that was just a little carried away, remind me not to be around when she goes all out."

"Mirai, what you doing?" I said as I watched the son of a famed computer genius rifle through the files on my computer.

"Just deleting some things that Mike downloaded..." Mirai answered back in a distracted tone.

"What kinda things?"

"Bad things," S'rac replied with a disgusted look.

"Ohhhhh..." I understood. I decided I really did not want to see the details of those files.

"He was showing them to the chibis."

"What?!" I exclaimed.

"Yup. I can't believe it myself."

I sighed, "Males are so sick..."

"Ouch. That hurt." S'rac made a sad face.

"Well, I guess you aren't. You're just an exception. Most guys are sick."

"I can agree with that."

"Are you gay or something?"

S'rac face-faulted. "Say what?!" He sweatdropped.

I laughed, "Just messing with ya, just messing." S'rac made a face back at me that was remarkably close to the -_- face that was used on the computer.

"Awh, I didn't mean it S'rac. No, really I didn't! Pleeeeeeeeeeeease forgive me, almighty S'rac!" I cried out as I fell to my knees. I crawled to his feet and started petting them. "Good master, nice master... my precious..." I continued my muttering in a lower tone but continued to pet his feet.

When I snuck a peek at S'rac's face this time it looked like the O.o face from the computer. "Umm... I think that's enough of that." He shook his foot to try to get me to let go but I just held on tightly.

"Bouke. Stop molesting his poor feet," J'dee remarked from where she was sitting on the sidelines and flipping through my collection of anime pics.

"Awh, you people are no fun," I pouted and let go of my 'precious' but not before giving them one last pat. S'rac made sure to back well away from me as I got to my feet. I winked at him, "You know you liked it."

"Um... no..." S'rac busied himself with turning his attention back to the files Mirai was deleting but, to his surprise, the Trunks from the future had collapsed on the keyboard and was laughing uncontrollably.

"It's not funny!" S'rac cried out.

"That's what you think!" Mirai gasped out and then continued to laugh.

I chuckled a little myself and earned a glare from S'rac. I sighed. "I guess I'll leave then..." I turned to go and saw Vegeta standing in the door. "What do you want Veggie?" I asked, grinning.

The first thing the three travelers noticed was the horrendous heat. It hit them in a crashing wave and they all started to sweat. "Ew... nasty climate," Bana shuddered.

"I dunno," Goku looked around, "I kinda like it."

"Savannah looking place. Hey, look!" Rogue pointed at herd of herbivores, "There's some antelope over there at that watering hole. And where there's prey..." she looked around carefully.

"There's predators?" Bana asked.

"Yeah, usually."

"Like that one?" Bana pointed at a lion stalking toward them.

"Yeah. Like that one." Rogue stared at the beast.

"Is that thing dangerous?" Goku asked, sizing up the feline.

"To us, yeah. To you, no fucking way," Bana answered.

"I think he's kawaii!"

"You would Kakarot." Rogue shook her head.

"Here kitty, kitty, kitty!" Goku called, crouching down and holding out his hand. "Nice kitty, pretty kitty, sweet kitty..." he continued to call to the lion.

"Oh Kami..." Rogue held her face in one hand. "Why us?"

"Actually, he _is_ pretty cute." Bana grinned.

"All right. I correct myself. Why me?" Rogue groaned, "That's not the way you call a lion!"

The lion crept closer to Goku. It seemed slightly confused by the fact that Goku did not run away but hey! Food was food and in savage Africa, this lion was not going to pass up the chance at a willing meal. The feline growled at the crouching Saiyan.

"Baka, baka, baka..." Rogue muttered.

"Awh, did you hear that? The poor thing's stomach growled! He must be awfully hungry!" Goku said sympathetically.

"Why don't you just let him gnaw on your hand?" Rogue commented sarcastically.

"But that would hurt..."

"That's the point, genius."

Goku put a hand behind his head and laughed, "Ah, Rogue! You're too funny!"

"Stupid freak..."

It was at this moment, that the lion chose to start its assault on the three 'helpless' beings. The beast leapt at Goku with a mighty roar and its gleaming teeth bared.

Unfazed, Goku stepped forward and brought a fist up in an uppercut to the underside of the lion's jaw. The beast fell to the ground with a _thump_ and was still.

"That's gonna leave a mark..." Bana said, "Or else kill him."

"I didn't want to, but he started it..." Goku sighed.

"Kakarot, it's just a stupid lion. Don't feel bad."

"But I don't want to hurt anyone."

"Kakarot," Rogue growled, "don't try my patience..."

"What am I do-" Goku's question was cut off the sound of rustling in the tall grasses and then the appearance of a large group of natives. They were dressed only in loincloths and covered with colored mud that was painted on them in intricate swirling patterns. The group of hunters leveled their bows and spears at the intruders. "Whoa. Where'd they come from?" Goku blinked, his face showing his surprise.

I don't think we're in the position to ask questions," Rogue hissed as one of the tall Africans poked her with the spear he held. It might have been wooden, but it still was very sharp and uncomfortable when being stuck in the human gut.

One of the hunters prodded the lion carefully with his spear. When he saw that the beast was unconscious, he let loose a noise that betrayed his amazement and he began jabbering to his companions. The other hunters became excited at whatever their friend was telling them and they put their spears and bows down on the ground and threw themselves down in front of Rogue, Bana and Goku.

"What're they doing?" Goku asked as he listened to the natives mumbling a chant together.

"I do believe that they're worshipping us..." Rogue grinned impishly.

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Bana asked as she rubbed her hands together.

"Abso-fucking-lutely!" Rogue chuckled, an evil glint in her eyes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: Hi hi all! ^_^ Ain't ya glad I got this out faster then the last one? :P Hehe... Anywho, I've got the last bit of this story all planned out. Just about 5 - 10 chaps left. I dunno for sure quite how many but-

Vegeta: Shut up. They don't want to hear about this story ending.

Jeril: You can't make me be silent!

Vegeta: Shut up.

Jeril: Never!

Vegeta: Shut up.

Jeril: No!

Kakarot: Shut up.

Jeril: Grrrrrrrrrrs... fine... stupid ass Saiyans...

**Story Advertising:** THE Gohan and Videl Fic! - http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=869463 - Spot the clichés! Predict the future! (Or something like it...) The story of Gohan, involving the most written situations essential to a Gohan/Videl fic! Pretty good actually. A few spelling and grammar problems here and there but still a nice job. There's three parts to it. The school trip to Capsule Corporations, the teachers going on strike and the Z Warriors taking over the teaching, and the camping trip.


	50. Three dollars and fifteen cents?

"I just came to find out what everyone was doing in here," Vegeta answered, casting his eye over the room.

"Oh… damn…" I muttered.

"What're we having for dinner, ikeike?" he asked.

"Yeah! I'm hungry!" Goten piped up.

"Me too!" Chibi Trunks chimed in.

"I don't know!" I shrugged.

"We should order takeout!" S'rac suggested.

"How many people do we have to feed?" J'dee asked.

"Ummmm…" I mentally counted, "We have two Saiyans, three demi-Saiyans, eight humans, and one Namek."

"Wow…" S'rac's eyes widened.

"That'd be one helluva bill for takeout…" J'dee muttered.

"Where's everyone gonna sleep tonight? How're we gonna feed them all? I've nearly run out of money!" I groaned. I put my face in my hands, "This has not been my week…"

"We could all chip in a bit," J'dee offered.

"Yeah! I have…" S'rac empty out his pockets, "Ummm…" he counted his change and laughed nervously, "Three dollars and fifteen cents?"

J'dee looked in her wallet, "I have twenty-one dollars."

"I've got nineteen bucks and some odd change left but I'm sure Bana and Rogue will have some money too."

"We could have a combo of takeout and home cooked food tonight," S'rac smiled.

"Why thanks for offering to cook tonight!" I grinned at S'rac, "You're so sweet!" I quickly exited the room before he could say otherwise.

S'rac face fell, "But I don't know how to cook… shit…"

"I'll help," J'dee offered, "though my cooking skills aren't the best either."

"We should be able to whip up a half-edible substance between us."

"Humans…" Vegeta rolled his eyes.

"Power up Kakarot!" Bana ordered.

"Why?" Goku asked.

"Because I told you to!"

"But-"

"Do it! NOW!" Bana barked and waved her ever-ready frying pan threateningly. Goku backed up a step and nodded vigorously.

"And try to make it a bit more showy then usual!" Rogue added, cracking her whip at the natives with a little bit of an evil chuckle.

"Hai!" Goku scrambled away to put a little distance between him and the girls and then stopped, and took a deep breath. He closed his eyes, threw his head back and let loose a scream that echoed across the grassland with a deafening finality.

The natives' chanting grew louder and they watched with wide eyes as the rocks around Goku began to lift from the ground. A few screamed slightly as little lightning bolts crackled around Goku, whipping around him and dancing over his hair. The chanting stopped all together when Goku's hair and eyes began flickering to gold and green.

Finally, the flickering stopped and his hair grew out to reach his kneecaps and his eyebrows disappeared as the Saiyan ascended to Super Saiyan 3. Goku grinned at the natives a bloodthirsty expression and aimed a ki blast at a nearby tree. A few seconds later and after the smoke cleared, the tree was no longer there. The only evidence present that it had ever been there was a few leaves and splinters of wood that came falling to the ground.

The natives began their chant again with a sense of urgency. One crawled forward to try to touch Goku's foot but he kicked the hunter away. Goku smirked and for a few moments looked like he did when Kakarot had resurfaced.

Bana and Rogue grinned and sauntered over to stand next to Goku on either side of him. Rogue put her hand on his right shoulder and Bana draped her arm over his other. "Go back to the house," Rogue ordered the Saiyan.

"Yeah. We've learned all we need to know," Bana grinned devilishly.

Goku shrugged and put his fingers to his forehead, "Okay." They disappeared, leaving the natives behind very awed and bewildered.

Bana and Rogue staggered as they appeared back in Bouke's house. Goku's technique was a little disorienting the first few times. "Where're the twins?" Rogue asked, looking around.

"I dunno. They were here a few minutes ago…" Bana muttered.

"They were tied back-to-back! Where could they have gone? There's no rope anywhere…" Rogue scratched her head. Bana nodded and picked up a banana she had left behind and ate it thoughtfully.

"Can I have one?" Goku asked.

Bana growled, "Not in this lifetime, baka."

"Darn…" his stomach grumbled loudly, "I'm starving though!"

"If you can find the twins, we'll make you an entire six-foot sub for yourself," Rogue promised.

"Really?" Goku went starry-eyed, "With turkey, ham, salami, bacon, cheese, lettuce, mayonnaise, tomatoes, green peppers, dill pickles, olives and sprouts?"

Bana grimaced, "All of that?"

"Hai!" Goku grinned widely.

"Nasty, but we'll do it! Just find the girls!" Rogue agreed.

"They're right in there!" Goku pointed to a broom closet.

"Really?" Bana opened it and the two tied up girls fell out, "Yup! There they are!"

"Yes!" Rogue grabbed one of the girls' arms and heaved them up. She dragged them over to where Goku stood and touched his arm. Bana grasped the other. "Take us back Kakarot!"

"Okay!" Once more, Goku put his fingers to his head and they disappeared only to reappear on the African savannah. The natives they had appeared in the midst of jumped back while gibbering wildly in their language.

"We come bearing gifts!" Rogue smiled wildly and pushed the twins forward.

"What?!" Angel screamed.

"No fucking way!" Alice howled.

Bana stuck out her tongue, "That's what you get for trying to mess with the Ouji's son!"

"You two aren't worthy of the Saiyans," Rogue smiled evilly.

"But you can't leave us here with these, these… _savages_!" Alice screamed as one of the men began to pet her hair.

"Well, that's why you think before you act!" Bana grinned cheerfully.

"Let's head back to the house!" Rogue said to Goku.

"But… won't Bouke be slightly pissed about-" Bana and Rogue fixed two identical, extremely threatening glares on him. He made a squeaking noise and nodded furiously, "We're going, we're going!"

"That's a good boy!" Bana smiled sweetly as they disappeared from the hot African continent.

"I'm gonna feel horrible about this for a while…" Goku muttered to himself as he sat down on the couch.

"Don't! They deserved it!" Rogue reminded him.

"You promised me a six-foot sub!" Goku reminded them, hoping food would take his mind off what he had just done.

"All right, all right." The two girls went into the kitchen and set to work making the large, Saiyan-sized snack.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: Grrrrrs… Life just seems to wanna keep me from updating! *shakes fist at the skies* I got my comp taken away for a few weeks and I couldn't update. I'm really sorry.

Vegeta: *sighs* You're such a worthless baka.

Kakarot: Can't you stay out of trouble for just a few weeks?

Jeril: *blushes and rubs the back of her head while staring at the floor bashfully* Not really… it just seems to follow me everywhere I go… *coughs* Anyway, that's a lot of crap ya wanted on your sub Kakarot. How can you bear to eat it all?

Goku: Well, that's how Chichi always makes them for me.

Jeril: Nasty… that's too much stuff… mayo *twitch* tomatoes *shudder* olives *gag* yuck, yuck, yuck… HOLY SHIT!!! O.O!!!

Vegeta: What? What's wrong?

Jeril: I've got 715 reviews!! *faints*

Goku: Erm… well… here's a free Cell Jr. plushie to Reaper of the Highwind, the 715th reviewer!

P.S. S'rac, J'dee, I couldn't contact you and ask you about your cooking skills. I was in a rush to get this out so I hope you're okay with that...

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	51. Kami, do you love me?

"Making dinner tonight?" Bana asked J'dee and S'rac as they entered the kitchen. The two unfortunates voiced confirmation of the statement.

"Cool. Well, I want some chicken soup, okay?" Rogue said.

"Right…" S'rac nodded and watched Rogue and Bana pick up a large, six-foot sub packed full of sandwich materials and carry it out of the kitchen.

S'rac and J'dee stood alone and stared around at the implements, cookbooks, and other, various items that surrounded them. "Where do we start?" S'rac asked in a hopeless, confused voice.

"Um… I don't know…" J'dee admitted, flipping through a cookbook, "Nearly all of this stuff sounds pretty good, but I don't have the cooking skills to make them..."

"Well…" S'rac picked up a box of Bisquick that was sitting on a counter, "Here's a recipe for biscuits… It doesn't sound too hard…"

"And here's a recipe for chicken soup like Rogue wanted. I think you just throw all the stuff into the pot and boil it. Should be pretty easy."

S'rac picked up another cookbook and opened up to a random page, "Oooo… stir fry… that's not too complex, I think…"

"Hamburgers!" J'dee announced, looking in the refrigerator.

"French fries!" S'rac exclaimed, checking the freezer. He pulled out a bag of the frozen, pre-made fries. "Easy!"

"Hey! This won't be too bad!" J'dee said, her voice filled with optimism.

"Yeah! We can do it!" S'rac grinned and began to prepare the food.

I groaned. I was so bored. Mirai was playing computer games and the chibis and Krillin were playing Monopoly. There was nothing for me to do and no one interesting to bug. I stood and sauntered out of the room. _What to do, what to do?!_ My mind complained to no one in particular.

Suddenly, my stomach rumbled. "I'm hungry…" I muttered and tromped to the kitchen. As soon as I stepped foot inside, I regretted it instantly. I was hit with at least five unknown substances, some of which stank, and I slipped in a puddle of something (I don't want to know what) and went sprawling.

"What the hell happened here?!" I hollered, trying to get back on my own two feet unsuccessfully. Once more, I went crashing down.

"We're cooking!" S'rac sung out in a cheery voice. I looked around the kitchen. _Kami… I am soooo eating takeout tonight…_

"Yeah! This is fun!" J'dee agreed, dumping some stuff into a large stockpot and stirring it around.

"What, pray tell, is that?" I asked.

"Chicken soup!"

_Did she just put the whole chicken in there? Without removing the organs?_ "Right… ok… well, I'm just gonna grab these chips right here," I did so, "and leave you people to your jobs. Have fun!" I backed out of the kitchen before I died from whatever fumes were coming off of the 'food' they were cooking.

"Oh Kami… have mercy on the stomachs of the innocents…" I mumbled as I entered the living room. There, Rogue and Bana were camped out on the Playstation 2 playing the Dragonball Z game Budokai.

"Take that, Kakarot!" Bana screamed, lashing out in the game and punching the Kakarot character, taking down his health a fair bit.

"Nice one, Bana!" Rogue grinned.

"Hey! Ease up on me a bit! I'm a nice guy! I don't deserve that kind of treatment!" Kakarot complained from where he sat on the couch.

"Ooooo… check out Veggie's ass… they did it quite nicely if I do say so myself," Bana said, a wicked gleam in her eye.

Vegeta growled but said nothing from where he stood in the shadows.

"Nice detail on the spandex, IRL and in the game," I commented, coughing into my hand the last bit. Bana and Rogue chuckled.

"IRL?" Kakarot asked confused.

"Never you mind, Kakarot."

"But-"

"Anyway! Rogue, Bana, you guys got any money for takeout tonight?"

"Uh," Rogue pulled out a few bills and passed them to me, "I think that's 8 or 10."

"Lemme see…" Bana dug around in her pockets for a moment and then brought out a handful of… something. She began to pick through it, "Hmmm… what have we here? Pocket lint, a penny, pocket lint, dime, receipt, chap stick, more pocket lint… Ooooo! A mini Snickers bar!" she pocketed that again, "A little more pocket lint, batteries, change, pocket lint, more change, and more change…" she began to count the change that was piling up. She finally handed me all the change and announced proudly, "Ten dollars and twelve cents! All in change!"

"That's a lot of change… How often do you empty out your pockets?" I asked curiously, kind of not wanting to know at the same time.

"Every other week."

"Ah… Well, I'm gonna call for takeout. What should we get?"

"Chinese food!"

"Pizza!"

"Hotdogs!"

"Hotdogs? Do they do hotdog takeouts?" I asked Kakarot.

"Do they?"

"I don't think so…"

"Oh…"

"Pizza?"

"How much money do you have?"

"77 and some odd cents."

"Pizza! Lotsa pizza!" Bana called out. "With bubblegum on it!"

"Bubblegum?"

"No, just kidding."

"Yeah. I was thinking bubblegum's a little str-"

"I meant chocolate cookie dough ice cream!"

"On pizza?" I grimaced.

"Yes!"

"That's weird…" Kakarot muttered.

"Coming from you Kakarot, it must be pretty odd…" Vegeta smirked.

"I need a camera…" Bana growled, glaring at the ceiling. "The DBZ people arrive in our universe and the one thing I need, I don't have! Kami! If you exist and you love me, a camera will fall down from the heavens right now and strike the ground in front of me!" Bana called out and then added as an afterthought, "And still work!"

"That won't happ-" I started and then paused as my ears picked up the sounds of a whistling noise. Suddenly, there was a _boom!_ noise and something came crashing through the roof and landed at Bana's feet.

She stared at it in amazement and slowly picked it up. "Oh my Kami…" she murmured.

"What?" Rogue asked, blinking wildly.

"It's a camera…" Bana's eyes were wide and she sat down on the couch, "I think I'm just a little weirded out by this."

"Does this stuff not happen a lot?" Kakarot asked.

"Yeah. This is what we like to call a 'miracle', if you're the religious type," I answered, "It has never happened before in my time. At least, not like this…"

"Ah. But you dared him pretty much. Usually, gods don't back down on dares." Mike said. He had just arrived in the last few minutes.

"I think they're warping our universe pretty bad… and I'm starting to wonder if this is a good thing…" I muttered, rubbing my face in my hands and grimacing. "What if all of a sudden everyone's prayers came true? It'd be bad! It'd be chaos! I'd be rich…" I grinned, "Maybe it won't be so bad after all!"

"It doesn't work like that, I'm afraid," Mike said, bringing down my hopes, "Once you believe in the god's existence, he/she/it usually won't do it again." He shrugged, "At least, that's how it works in books and stuff."

"Dammit!" I growled, "Fucking deities like to fuck with our minds!"

_WHABAM!_ All of a sudden, I was hit with what felt like a million pins and needles screaming and crashing through my body above the speed of light over and over again in a matter of seconds. Light danced over my body as the pain increased. I never knew I could hurt so much. I opened my mouth to scream but nothing came out as I went crashing to the ground. I twitched on the ground for a few minutes as the people around stared at me.

"Yeah… you shouldn't insult Kami…" Mike said with a little smile, "Or lightning will strike you."

"Kami's got a crazy sense of humor…" I groaned through a mouth that tasted a bit like blood, "I feel like I've been battered by ten Super Saiyans holding sledgehammers… Insane little bitch…"

"Watch it…" Mike warned, grinning widely as a few sparks crawled up my arms in warning, "He seems to have a short temper for a certain special person…"

"Bastard," I growled and clambered to my feet. "Ow, ow, ow! I'm gonna be sore for forever now! Not fair!" I picked up a nearby phone and dialed the local pizza number.

"Domino's Pizza. Can I take your order?"

"Yeah, I'd like to get three large pepperoni pizzas and three large cheese pizzas."

"Okay… is that all?"

"No, can I also get two six-packs of Mountain Dew and two six-packs of Pepsi?"

"Sure… will this be delivery or pickup?"

"Pickup," I gave the man our phone number.

"The total is 75 dollars and 52 cents. Your order will be ready in a half hour."

"All right. Arigato!"

"Wha-" I hung up.

"75 bucks! Kuso!"

"You got enough?" Rogue asked.

"Yeah, I'm just amazed at how much these boys can cost!" I said, jerking a thumb at the Saiyans. Vegeta glared at me and Bana snapped a pic of him. He turned and glared at her, earning himself another pic taken.

"Yeah! But it's hella worth it!" Bana grinned.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: Bleh. I hate myself. I haven't been able to write for forever. I just couldn't bring myself to sit down and type something up… The only things I could write were poems… Well, I dunno if this was really funny… I don't think it was… but yeah… *sigh* Gaaaaaaah… My life's been so, so… _bleh_ lately… It sucks…

Vegeta: You are such a bum.

Jeril: :p Live with it, baka.

**Story Advertising:** Random Miscellaneous Trigun Anecdotes - - Um, yeah. What the title says. Vury funny! No major spoilers, I think. A lot of references to the popular Legato/Knives yaoi idea. A little bit of humor for all you Trigun fans and it's even pretty damn funny to those of you who don't watch the series.


	52. Vegeta Vagina!

Vegeta stretched on the couch after announcing he was going to take a nap.

Bana grinned, "Veggie's posing for me! Oh, how I love that Saiyan!!" She snapped a couple photos from different angles and danced around, grinning like an idiot.

"Arghhh!!!" Vegeta charged up a ki ball in his hand, "I swear, girl, if you take one more picture of me I will kill you!"

"Oooooh!! Veggie's mad!" Bana snapped another shot.

"THAT'S IT!" Vegeta screamed and let the ki ball go blasting toward Bana. She luckily was able to dodge it and it crashed into the wall instead. I winced as I noted the damage done to the house.

"Vegeta. Please try not to destroy the house completely. After all, it's not mine," I begged.

"Fine…" Vegeta growled and stalked toward Bana.

"This is not good…" Bana took one look at the look he had on his face and bolted… but not before taking another picture.

"KAMI DAMN THAT BITCH!" Vegeta screamed and dashed off after her.

"I guess he's not a people person…" I muttered.

"How could you tell?" Mike asked sarcastically.

"I have a way of noticing those kinds of people," I grinned, "Anyway, you wanna go with me to pick up the pizzas in a bit?"

"Sure," he shrugged, "this house is too boring."

"Can I come?" Kakarot asked.

"Sure."

"Awesome!"

"So long as you don't eat the pizzas on the way back," I glared.

"Just one?"

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"Pretty please?"

"No."

"Pretty please on a triple fudge, fifteen scoop, strawberry-banana-vanilla-chocolate sundae with whipped cream, cherries and sprinkles on top?"

"Oh… that sounds good…" Mike murmured, wiping a bit of drool from the corner of his mouth, "I haven't had a sundae like that in years… and I had to share it with five of my friends when I did…"

"Really? I have one all to myself every other night!" Kakarot grinned.

"Welcome to Cavity Central," I muttered to myself, "Anyway! No matter how good it sounds, no means 'no.'"

"But… I'm hungry…"

"You just ate a six-foot sub!" Bana yelled at him as she ran through the living room.

"Baka!" Vegeta snarled as he ran after her.

"Which one?" Mike called after him.

"Kakarot and the girl!"

"And they're gone…" I commented, "They're fast…"

"Vegeta must be pretty pissed. I haven't seen him move this fast since Trunks and Goten lit his pubes on fire," Kakarot muttered.

"NANI?!" I screamed.

"It was 'just a joke', or so Goten told me after he regained consciousness four hours later. Trunks came to the next day."

"Ouch…"

"Yeah, the bruises lasted for a week."

"Wow! With the Saiyan rate of healing… whoa! That must've been some beating!" Mike exclaimed.

"Well, wouldn't you be mad if someone lit your pubes on fire?"

"Yeah, I'd kill them."

"Exactly."

"He's gaining on me!" Bana shrieked as she ran by us another time.

"And I'm going to kill her when I catch up with her!" Vegeta growled, drawing in a ragged breath. He chased her around the room for a bit, she always staying a few feet ahead of the angered Saiyan.

"Is it just me, or is dear, old Vegeta looking just a tad bit winded?" I asked.

"Been slacking on your training?" Kakarot smirked.

"Just you wait, Kakarot! You're next!" the Saiyan no Ouji and his query disappeared again.

"Just how did those two do that anyway?" I asked, slightly curious.

"You planning something?" Mike asked me with a sick grin.

"Baka…" I growled.

"They caught him when he was napping… with no pants…" Kakarot explained.

"With no pants?" my eyes widened. Oh, the possibilities this opened up before me!

"He hasn't done it since. Sorry to burst your bubble."

"Dammit…" Mike laughed as my face fell. "Fuck you." I growled.

"That was just so funny an expression. You looked like the Heavens had parted and Kami had rained gifts of forgiveness and healing onto your being, making you whole on every level; mentally, spiritually, emotionally and physically."

I blinked. "What?"

"Never mind," he said with a smile, "We gonna go get those pizzas?"

"Yeah!" Kakarot bounced out the door, "C'mon, c'mon!! Can't you hear the pizza calling?"

"Umm, yeah… whatever." Mike and I followed Kakarot out the door and onto the porch.

"Hey! Piccolo! What're you still doing out here?" I asked.

"I've been mediating," the green Namek answered with his eyes closed.

"Ah… so I guess the stuff wore off?"

He nodded.

"Never mind. We're leaving to get some pizzas if anyone asks. Oh, and if you see Vegeta killing Bana, please stop him."

He nodded again.

"But how can he see anything if his eyes are closed?" Mike asked as we got into the car.

"Oh… uh… I dunno…" I started the car. "He'll figure it out by himself. Or Bana will take care of it herself. She is pretty capable of that. Very resourceful person."

"Ah, okay…"

"Let's go, let's go, let's goooooooo!" Kakarot whined from the backseat.

"Kami! Okay, okay! Shut up! I feel like I have a five-year-old in the backseat…" I growled, backing out of the driveway and out into the street.

"Can we stop by somewhere and get some-"

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"Pretty please?"

"We've already done this before."

"Oh yeah… but-"

"What was the answer last time?"

"No?"

"There's your answer."

Vegeta strode into Bouke's room. "Where's the girl?" he growled.

"What girl?" Mirai asked.

"Yeah, which one?" Krillin added.

"The banana one!" Vegeta snarled and turned to Chibi Trunks, "Brat two! Have you seen her?"

"Uh… no…"

"Umm…" Goten scratched his head, "I thought-"

Krillin cut Goten off, "Well, she ran by here a few minutes ago, but other then that, we haven't seen hide nor hair of her! Right guys?"

"Yup!"

"Absolutely!"

"She hasn't come by other then that!"

"But-"

Chibi Trunks tackled Goten, "Tickle attack!"

Vegeta looked at the two chibis suspiciously, "All right…" He turned and stormed out of the room.

***Two minutes before…***

Bana rushed into the room, "You guys gotta hide me!"

"What? From who?" Krillin asked.

"Vegeta! He's gonna kill me!"

"What'd you do to tousan?" Chibi Trunks asked.

"I took a couple pics of him! Not that many, I assure you! But he's gonna kill me now!"

"Tousan hates pictures! He nearly killed Goku one day when he tried to get him to participate in a family photo shoot," Mirai told me.

"Well, it's too late now! Just hide me!"

"Under the bed!" Chibi Trunks said and grabbed Bana, stuffing her under Bouke's bed in one swift movement.

"Here he comes!"

"Act normal!"

"Wait-"

"Shush!"

***Present time…***

Vegeta growled and kicked a stone. It went scuttling down the street. He was pissed. _Baka brats… I'll kill them all someday…_ but inside, he knew he couldn't. It just felt nice sometimes to vent and rage about death and destruction upon all living things.

"Hey mister!" he heard a voice call. He looked up and saw a group of kids playing some human sport involving a long stick and some gloves. He remembered the fool Yamcha had played it a while back.

"What do you want, brats?" he growled.

"Can you give us back our ball?" one of them asked.

"Nani?"

"It hit you in the head, man! How can you not have noticed it?" another yelled, pointing at his feet.

"Nani? What the hell kinda word is that?" one boy mumbled.

"It's Japanese," another boy answered, staring at Vegeta carefully.

Vegeta looked down and saw a ball at his feet. He picked it up. "This thing?"

"Yeah! What? Have you never seen a baseball before?" the first growled.

"Christ! He's some kind of retard!" a bigger one of the boys muttered.

"Retard?" Vegeta snarled. He was in a foul mood and these human brats weren't making it any better.

"Yeah! You're fucking stupid, man! Now give us back our ball and get the hell out of our neighborhood!"

"How dare you insult me, Vegeta, the Saiyan no Ouji, like that!"

"Awh, shit! Not only is he retarded, he's fucking crazy too!" the big, blond guy growled.

"You're asking for it, brat!" Vegeta began to charge up a small ki ball in his free hand. A couple of the kids noticed the light coming from one of his hands and, after putting all the pieces of the puzzle together, began to quickly back up from their comrade. No one who knew what Vegeta was capable of wanted to be in the way when he got angry.

A few of the blond's friends started chanting 'Vegeta Vagina!' while the blond boy retorted, "Asking for what? You probably couldn't hit me if you tried, you short, little fucker!"

"That's it! No one insults me like that and lives to talk, unscarred, about it!" Vegeta released the ki blast at the boy. It created a large crater where the boy had once been standing. He was lying on his back, crying and clutching his leg with one hand. It was bent in a way that it _definitely_ was not supposed to go and his other arm was hanging limply at his side. He was also bleeding profusely from many small and large cuts.

"Holy shit!"

"Oh my god!"

"Jesus Christ!" A few of the boys fainted while the others just stood, staring wide-eyed at either the blond boy and crater or Vegeta.

"No one, and I mean _no one_ calls me anything but my proper title and gets away with it," he growled, lifting off the ground and floating above the kids, "Is that clear?"

"Hai, Vegeta-sama!" the boy who recognized the Japanese word called out. A few more echoed similar things.

Vegeta nodded to himself, satisfied, and flew off in the direction of a large amount of kis. He wanted to find a mall or something. He was starving and needed some food. Never mind that he had no money. There wasn't anything a little force couldn't buy…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: Arigato, arigato, arigato times one thousand to Queen Misaki!! ^_^ Thanks a lot for pointing out that mistake! That truly proves to me people are paying attention to my stories when they read them! That's also what happens when you stay up till the wee hours of the morning writing. Hehehe! (BTW, I fixed it now)

Ooooo!! You watch Fruits Basket! I love that anime! ^_^ For pointing that out for me and being a Fruits Basket fan, I would like to present you with a little something!! The Three Musketeers of Fruits Basket!! *pulls three plushies out of the Magic Plushie Box™* Muwhaha!! Here's Hatori-san, Shigure-san, and Ayame-san! ^_^ Once more, arigato!!

Kakarot: Where'd you get this Magic Plushie Box anyway?

Jeril: DON'T FORGET THE "™" AT THE END!! Sheesh! I found it! ^_^ And trademarked it. So there! :P

Vegeta: Baka… *Jeril huggles a Vegeta plushie* Where did you get _that?_

Jeril: The plushie box!!

Vegeta: *vein pulses* Destroy. It. Now.

Jeril: Nope! It's too kawaii! ^_^ *huggle, huggle*

Vegeta: *blasts Jeril and the plushie* How's that for kawaii?

Jeril: x.x *twitch, twitch*

Kakarot: Awh, Vegeta. It's not nice to incinerate people's toys. *Vegeta pulls a Goku plushie out of the box and rips off it's head* Oooookay… I think I get your point there… Wonderful weather we're having, ne?

P.S. Extra long chap for all of ya!! I was going to have Vegeta kill the blond guy and all his immature friends… buuuuuuut… I didn't want to! Blondie does deserve it though… he might die later on… depends if he tries to make fun of Vegeta or not again… and if a lot of the reviewers think he should die or not. ^_~ Let's have a vote, ne?

P.P.S. If any of you listen to the Smashing Pumpkins and know the song 'Bullet with Butterfly Wings', you might want to stop by and check out my songfic to that song. It's not based on any anime or books, just the song so anyone can read it. You just might want to be able to take a little blood/gore and horror first. ^_^ Have fun!

**Story Advertising: **My Brother, My Protector, My Friend - ?storyid=414461 - A fic about 17 and 18 discovering their parents, but their parents aren't exactly who they thought they would be. Kinda angsty, but really good!! ^_^


	53. What? You’ve never seen a Saiyan before?

I pulled into the Domino's' small parking lot and turned off the car. "C'mon guys," I said as I got out of the car, "Let's go get that pizza." Kakarot bounced out and, before I knew it, was inside the pizza place. Mike and I hurried in after him.

"Where's the pizzaaaa?!?" he whined to the person at the counter.

"What name did you order it under?"

"Um… what?"

"The name." 

"Uh… pepperoni and cheese?" he answered, confused.

"Is this a prank?" the man growled irritably.

"Bakayaro!" I growled and pushed the Saiyan aside, "Hi there! The last name's Enda, first name Bouke."

The man checked his display. "Your pizza will be done in five minutes."

"What? Five minutes? I can't wait that long!! I'm gonna diiiiiiiiiiie!!" Goku held his growling stomach and whimpered. The man behind the counter rubbed his temples and mumbled something about a 'killer headache' as he retreated to the back.

"Kakarot, sit down," I hissed and pointed at a line of seats by the wall.

"But I'm so hung-"

"How's about no pizza at all?"

"I'm sitting! I'm sitting!" he sat down quickly.

"And no talking!"

"But-"

"No pizza?"

Kakarot slapped a hand over his mouth.

"Good boy," I grinned.

"Bo, you really should lay up on the guy just a little," Mike chided me, "He's just being himself. No one really minds that."

"Yeah, but he's so immature! It's embarrassing!" I complained.

"You'll only have to deal with him for a few more days, either way!" Mike reminded me.

"Oh… yeah… they're coming home in just a couple days… dammit… this sucks! I wasn't even able to throw a party!"

"There's still time," Mike grinned.

"But the Saiyans and the kids…"

"Oh… damn. This sucks. And we don't have any money left so we can't even just go out to any place…"

"Yeah…" we stood in silence for a bit.

"Bouke Enda?" someone called from the counter.

"That's me!" I called out and hurried over.

"Your total is 75 dollars and 52 cents." I handed over the money to the teenage girl.

"Arigato!" I said, handing three of the pizzas to Mike along with one of the six-packs. I carried the rest.

"And don't even let Kakarot touch the pizza!" I growled as we made our way out of the store.

"Wait! Kakarot?" the girl asked, running out from behind the counter.

"Drogan!" the other man exclaimed.

"Be right back!" she replied and followed us out to the car, "I thought you looked familiar! Are you Son Goku?"

"Hai! That's me!" he grinned.

"Holy Kami-sama!" she exclaimed, staring at him.

"Listen, man. We gotta get back home soon. We've got some other DBZ people who're starving and waiting for this pizza."

"Really? Well, then by all means, hurry along!" she said, "I just have one, little thing to ask…"

"What is it?" I asked as I put the pizzas into the car.

"Can I take a picture of you, Goku-san?"

"Sure!" his grin widened.

"All right! I'll be right back!" she dashed inside quickly and returned with a camera. She handed it to Mike and had him take a photo of her standing next to Kakarot, the both of them grinning like idiots.

"I can't believe I have a pic of me and Goku!" she squealed, clutching the camera to her tightly after Mike had handed it back to her.

"Well, happy to make your day but we have to go now…"

"Wait! Just one more question!"

"What?" I asked exasperatedly. I was beginning to hate DBZ fans even though I was one of them. It's not that they're bad people! They just have the horrible habit of… well… doing what fans do!

"Do you need more pizza? Someone ordered two large pepperonis and didn't come pick them up and, well, it's only been a half hour, and they're still pretty good… and we'd just throw them out anyway… so… um… yeah… do you?"

"My Kami, girl! Of course we do! We've got a horde of hungry Saiyans waiting at home! Two more pizzas would be more then appreciated!" Mike answered, hugging the girl.

Drogan blushed and muttered, "Be right back…" She hurried inside and quickly returned with the two pizzas. "Have fun! And see you again someday, maybe!" she said as we got into the car.

"Take care of yourself!" I called out the window as we drove away. Maybe some fans weren't so bad after all…

"Bye!" Mike waved.

"Free pizza!" Goku mumbled to himself as he began eating the half-hour old pizza, "Still good!"

Vegeta landed in the parking lot of a large superstore. He glanced around at the humans staring at him. "What? You've never seen a Saiyan before?" he growled and stomped toward the store, his stomach rumbling ominously.

He walked through the store for a bit, viewing his options. He then grabbed a cart (he was planning on picking up a lot of food) and strolled over to the deli. There was a fairly long line so, being the Saiyan no Ouji and all, he shoved the humans out of his way and stomped to the front of the line. He looked over the food and snapped, "Four twelve-piece boxes of chicken!"

"Sir, there's no cutting in line. I'm afraid I'm go-"

"Now!" he roared, glaring at the man behind the counter balefully.

"Yes sir!" the man began putting together Vegeta's order as quick as he could. He slapped the price tags on and handed them to the Saiyan. Vegeta dropped them in his cart and, after taking a plastic silverware packet from the salad bar, continued on his way.

His next stop was the chips and drink aisle. He grabbed a bag of everything and threw them in the cart. Doritos, Fritos, Cheetos, Lays, you name it, it was in that cart. Vegeta studied the soda options for a moment and then opted to head back to the dairy area. "Even a Saiyan needs strong bones…" he told himself as he tossed a couple two-gallon containers of milk into the cart. But, as he was passing by the sodas again, he grabbed just one two-liter bottle of coke.

As he went through the store on his way to the exit, he grabbed some ice cream, crackers, smoked salmon, a few energy drinks, some candy (to bring home to the demi-Saiyans, mind you), and other odds and ends that caught his eye as he passed by.

Unbeknownst to the hungry Saiyan, but known to you and me, after the deli incident he began to collect quite a following of the superstore employees, mostly security guards. As the Saiyan no Ouji began to exit the store, these employees surrounded him in a circle and the biggest and toughest one cleared his throat, "Excuse me… _sir._ Aren't you forgetting something?"

Vegeta thought for a moment while looking over his cart, "No, no… I think I got everything I came for."

"Sir, you forgot to checkout," the man growled.

The Saiyan fought to keep a smirk from tugging on the corners of his mouth. " Oh no! I didn't forget! I just didn't have the intention of checking out from the minute I set foot in this store."

"Oh really, sir. Well, I'm afraid you're going to have to come with me then."

"I will not."

"Oh yeah? Think you're tough, do you?"

"I know I'm tough. I'm the Saiyan no Ouji, after all."

"Saiya-what?"

"The Saiyan no Ouji. In your crap tongue, the Prince of the Saiyans."

"In _my_ crap tongue? Right… well, you're gonna come with me whether you like it or not, buddy." The security guard cracked his knuckles.

"Buddy?" Vegeta bristled at this causally used endearment. The man was beginning to remind him of Kakarot, "Listen, _bastard_, I'm not going anywhere with you. Because, for one, I'm married," a few of the employees surrounding Vegeta snickered and once more, Vegeta repressed his smirk, "and another thing, I'm hungry and my food is getting cold as we speak."

"It's not your food until you pay for it!" the man hissed, his face getting red from the insult Vegeta had thrown at him.

"I'm not going to pay."

"Then I'm afraid I'm going to have to hurt you…" the man growled, advancing toward Vegeta aggressively.

"I was hoping you were going to say that," Vegeta answered, finally letting his smirk show as he released his hold on the cart and faced his opponent.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: Holy Kami-sama! I can't believe I did that again!! *smacks self* I'm such a baka! Once again, arigato a thousand times to Queen Misaki for pointing out that at the beginning of the last chap, I left out an entire paragraph so it made no sense when Vegeta flipped out on Bana. I again fixed my mistake and I think I'm going to start reading over my chaps carefully before I post them. Hehehe! *laughs and rubs the back of her head* Gomen nasai all!

I thought, since they were heading to Domino's, Drogan deserved a quick, guest entrance seeing as she works at Domino's and all. ^_^ Hope you're having a good day, Drogan!!

Kakarot: That was really nice of her to give us the pizza!

Vegeta: It was either to us or the dumpster, baka.

Kakarot: Well, it was still nice of her to think of us! Arigato, Drogan! And she called me _Goku_ not _Kakarot_ unlike _some people!_ *gives Jeril the Eye™*

Jeril: Shut up, Kakarot! Anyway, Drogan's ma buddy!! She's cool!! ^_^ 

Vegeta: All of you people frighten me…

Jeril: Gah, as I was writing the superstore part, I was drooling so hardcore!! All that food!! *whimper* I had to go get some chips and salsa, I was so hungry!

Happy late Easter everyone! Or Passover! Or Something Else! *hands out chocolate bunnies, chocolate eggs with the caramel centers and other goodies* I hope everyone had a better Easter then I did! -_- My parents didn't give me anything… not even one jelly bean… *sigh* But then again, I don't like jelly beans… unless they're Jelly Bellies, mmmmm… nummy… ^_^

**Story Advertising: **The Very Last Lemon  – Story ID = 1062131 – A DBZ fic about the NC-17 ban by ff.n. It's so funny. This is a must-read for all of you people out there who don't support the ban. ( Oh yes. No worries, it's PG-13 btw ^_^ )


	54. This soup tastes kind of funny

"C'mon! Inside everyone! I'm starving!" I said, carrying my pizzas inside. Mike and Kakarot followed close behind, Kakarot only carrying one pizza now as he had quickly eliminated the other. We set down the pizzas on the table with the sodas as J'dee and S'rac finished putting out their food. I sniffed the air, "That stir fry smells delicious!"

"Thanks!" S'rac grinned.

"Ooooo! Chicken soup!" Kakarot drooled as he smelled the wonderful scent wafting from the soup. I looked at it suspiciously though. It was a bit off-color for chicken soup…

"DINNER'S READY!" the Saiyan bellowed without any warning and then begin serving himself food. I quickly sat down and secured some stir-fry on rice with a piece of pizza on the side and some french fries doused heavily in ketchup.

Goten, Chibi Trunks and Mirai Trunks hurried in and grabbed hamburgers, biscuits, pizza, chicken soup, and whatever else was in reach, piling their plate quite high. Krillin entered along with Bana, Rouge and Vicky a little later and the four wrestled food away from the hungry Saiyans as they sat down at the table. Krillin and Rouge even formed a temporary truce so they could wrestle the pot of chicken soup away from Kakarot as he would pour a bowl, eat it quickly, pour another, eat that one, pour again, etc.

"Hey Dad… these biscuits… are… rock hard…" Goten murmured, clutching his jaw.

"That's insulting to the cooks!" Rogue growled, "Now eat it!"

"But it's true, Rogue! You try one! I think I chipped a tooth on mine…" Chibi Trunks muttered, rubbing his jaw.

"This soup tastes kind of funny…" Mirai piped up, "I didn't want to mention it before but it's… uh… different…"

"Eat the food and don't complain!" Bana howled, whipping out her frying pan and knocking the three demi-Saiyans' heads around a bit.

"Yes ma'am!" the three chimed and began chowing down on the food, no matter how horrid it tasted.

"But the hamburgers are burnt on the outside and raw in the middle…" Krillin said, poking at his with a fork.

"Don't make me have to destroy you!" Rogue hissed, eyeing the monk threateningly.

"Ulp!" Krillin's face turned pale and he slid down in his chair until the shiny top of his head was level with the food.

I nibbled on a biscuit, well, tried to. It was as hard as a hockey puck, like the kids said. With increasing fear, I took a hamburger and cut it in half. True to Krillin's statement, it was charred on the outside and raw in the inside.

I took a deep breath of air as I poured myself a bowl of soup. It smelled okay, but like I had observed before, it was an odd shade of yellow. Like piss, really. I grimaced as I brought a spoon of it to my lips. Steeling myself for the worse, I sipped at it.

I immediately spat the concoction out in the bowl. "Jesus! What the hell did you put in that shit?"

"What? Ummm… celery, carrots, chicken…" S'rac answered.

"How did you prepare the chicken?"

"Um, I took it out the bag, put the chicken juice broth stuff in the pot along with some water and other prepared broth, and then rinsed off the chicken and stuck that in too."

"You mean you didn't take out the organs? Or cut it up?" I felt like throwing up.

"Um… no…" S'rac blushed.

"I was wondering why there were no chicken chunks…" Kakarot muttered to himself, poking at his empty dish.

"What about the biscuits?" Goten asked.

"Well, I followed the Bisquick directions to the letter!" J'dee said.

"Oh shit! I forgot! I replaced the Bisquick with flour!" I slapped my forehead, "I'm such a baka!"

"And, well, the hamburgers just didn't want to cook right…"

"At least the stir-fry, rice, and french fries turned out right…" S'rac sighed.

"I thought the chicken soup wasn't that bad. If no one else wants it or the hamburgers, I'll take them!" Kakarot volunteered and began guzzling the soup out of the pot.

"I sure hope Saiyan stomachs are immune to food poisoning…" I mumbled as I watched the hungry Saiyan begin to eat the half-raw hamburgers.

The man advanced at Vegeta, throwing a punch at the Saiyan no Ouji's face. Vegeta dodged it easily and gave the man an uppercut to his jaw. The security guard was knocked a few feet into the air and into a nearby wall. The resounding crash as he impacted with the tiled wall made his cronies back up a few feet and look at Vegeta in a new light.

"Wha are yew waitin' feh?" the man mumbled as he picked himself up from the ground, clutching his broken jaw and grimacing in pain, "Junt da 'ucka!"

"What?" one of the other guys asked.

"Get 'im!" the man howled at his friends and they only paused a moment before advancing on the Saiyan.

Vegeta smirked again. _So they think they can overwhelm me with sheer numbers? Hah! I'd like to see them succeed!_ In one fluid motion, he punched the nearest man in the stomach and elbowed another one in the face who was behind him. He picked up a tall, gangly man and threw him at a few of his comrades, effectively knocking them all down.

"Bring on all of your best!" Vegeta laughed, "I will kill every one of you humans!"

"'You humans'?" one of the men who still stood mumbled to himself and gave Vegeta an odd look.

"Yes! You pathetic, weak, scummy beasts with no power whatsoever could never stand up to a god such as I!" Vegeta burst into a fit of maniacal laughing as he began randomly blasting all over the super market. Rubble fell on the helpless common humans below but Vegeta did not care. He was having fun! For the first time in nearly a decade, he had the license to blast the shit out of whatever he wanted and there were no consequences! And boy, did it feel good!

Still laughing, he picked up the cart and took off into the air. He crashed through the roof and flew off in search of a scenic spot at which to eat his food as the super store crashed into a large pile of rubble and ruins behind him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: Finally some good old fashion Veggie ass-whooping! ^_^ Don't you love it when that hott Saiyan bitch gets mad?

Vegeta: Bitch? *arches an eyebrow at Jeril*

Jeril: :P You know you like it Vegeta. Woman on top, ne?

Vegeta: Uh… no… *walks off*

Kakarot: Woman on top?

Jeril: *sigh* Never mind, Kakarot…

I've decided to make a mailing list, so if you wanna be on it, just send me an e-mail with 'ABDN' as the title or 'Mailing List' and my fics that you want to be notified about in the content. ^_^ E-mail addy: writerjeril@hotmail.com

Oh, and if the cooks feel even slightly wounded by my insulting their cooking, *glomp* I'm soooooooooooooorry!! It's in the sake of humor! Pure humor!! I'm so sorry!! *cries*


	55. Your children aren't special!

Vegeta flew to a park and settled down by a waterfall to eat his dinner. He kept an eye out though. Waterfalls were the favorite hangout of a certain Namek and the Saiyan no Ouji was in a mood that he did not want that Namek to disturb.

Vegeta ripped through the food at an amazing rate, pausing every once and a while to chug down some milk. Passer-bys stopped and stared while children dared each other to see who could get the closest to the Saiyan before he got mad. A small boy got to the ten feet mark before Vegeta looked up and snarled, "Get away brat before I decide to end your pathetic life right here and now!"

The boy giggled and retreated back to the safety of his mother's open arms while she stared with horror at Vegeta. "Children are to be protected and loved! Not exposed to violence! How can you threaten a child like that?" the mother asked in anger.

"Easily," he said, standing up and brushing crumbs off his pants and shirt, "What's so big about a child? I'm sorry to tell you, but your children aren't special! Do you that every time a human man comes, he comes 200 million sperm? And you're telling me that your child is special? Just because one out of those 200 million sperm cells connected with your egg?" Most of the women present gave Vegeta dirty looks.

"I… um…" the mother blinked.

"Wow… man, that's so true!" a punkish looking guy agreed. A few other men murmured an assent.

"What? You told me you loved children though!" a woman who had been holding his hand yelled, "That's it! You know how important children are to me! We're through!" She stormed off.

"What? Melissa! No! Come back, baby! I love you!" the man yelled, running off after his former girlfriend.

"You remind me of someone…" the boy muttered, his little forehead scrunched in concentration.

"Yeah… your voice…" another boy added.

The first boy snapped his fingers, "Vegeta!"

"Are you the voice actor for him?" a teenager asked.

"I heard that the voice actor for Vegeta also does Piccolo's voice!" the second boy said.

"What?! That Namek has the same dub voice as me?" Vegeta growled. He had listened in on a conversation that Bouke, Bana and Rouge had had and so he had picked up so anime lingo.

"What? _You?_" the teenager lifted an eyebrow, "Dude, do you seriously think you're Vegeta?"

"Of course!" Vegeta snarled, "Who else would I be?"

"He does look a lot like the Prince actually…" the second boy looked at Vegeta closely.

"And he's reacting a lot like him…" the first boy nodded, his fiery hair bobbing up and down.

"You two can't seriously believe he's Vegeta?" the teenager asked.

"Why'd you cry on Namek?" the red-haired boy addressed the question to Vegeta.

Vegeta's vein popped out, "Don't ever mention that."

"You exposed a weakness to Goku," the other boy added.

"It wasn't too smart."

"Yeah, he could take over the Saiyan Princeship anytime!"

"Uh huh. What's left of it, anyway."

"Yes, it's very sad…"

Vegeta's vein throbbed wildly as he ground his teeth together. He snarled, "You two are going to die horrible deaths!" he brought up his hands and created giant balls of ki in them.

"Wow! It's the ki energy!" the teenage boy's jaw dropped.

"He's really Vegeta!" the little boy grinned and the redheaded one opened up a little backpack and took out a small notepad and pen.

"Can I have your autograph, Prince Vegeta sir?" he asked, his eyes pleading with the Saiyan no Ouji as he held out the notepad and pen.

Vegeta blinked and chewed on his lip. On one hand, he could kill the brats and do the world a favor. On the other hand, he could sign the paper therefore forever planting himself in the boy's heart and then when he took over the world he would have a loyal follower who would do his bidding.

"All right." He extinguished the ki balls and took the notepad and scrawled 'Vegeta, the Saiyan no Ouji' on piece of paper and drew a quick sketch of him going Super Saiyan. He did not like many people to know, but he liked to draw. He gave the notepad back to the boy.

The redhead looked at the signature and picture and looked back up at Vegeta with shining eyes. "Thank you, Prince Vegeta! I'm going to have this framed!" he ran back to his mother to show her but she quickly picked up the boy and ran away from the Saiyan.

"Wow, man. So you are, like, _the_ Saiyan no Ouji?" the teenager gaped.

"Yes, and if you'll excuse me, I must be going." Vegeta turned to leave.

"But you need to teach me to use ki!" The teenager grabbed Vegeta's arm.

Vegeta locked eyes with the teenager and snarled, "Do you have a death wish?"

"N-no!"

"Then let go of me, boy!"

"Yes sir!" the teenager let go immediately and Vegeta picked up the leftover candy and chips and then took off into the air, leaving the small, dumbstruck crowd behind.

"Oh man, I am so glad we got that pizza!" I said, sighing as Mike, Bana and I cleaned up the food.

"Yeah, we would have died without it," Mike agreed.

"Dude! Check this out!" Bana called out and demonstrated to us how the leftover biscuits had cemented themselves to the plate they were put on.

"That's scary…" I muttered.

"Do any of you know where my father is?" Mirai Trunks asked as he wandered in.

"Actually, no. He wasn't there for dinner…" Mike pondered.

"Yeah, I can't locate his ki either. He's hidden himself."

"Uh oh… that's bad…"

"Not shit, Sherlock," I said to Mike, giving him a look.

"Awh, you should be nicer to me, Bo! After all, we loves you!" he winked.

"Pssh! As if that matters!"

"Awh… you hurts our feelings…" he mocked sniffed.

"Quit it, you two lovebirds. We've got a bigger problem and its name begins with a 'V,'" Bana said.

"No need to worry about Vegeta… He should be finding his way here any time now…" a voice intoned from the doorway that lead out into the backyard.

"What?" I turned and saw a tall, lean brunette with a black cloak on standing in my doorframe, "Who the hell are you?"

"My name is Sango, and I am here to make all your Vegeta wishes come true," she said with a devilish smile.

"'Vegeta wishes?'" Mirai and Mike echoed.

"This doesn't concern you two. Now go!" Sango ordered.

"Yeah! Get out of here!" Bana agreed, shoving the two males out of the kitchen.

"Now from the way you put it and just by looking at you I can tell you are a Vegeta fan too, I understand what's in this for us, but what's the plan?" I asked as Bana nodded.

"Just all of this while locked in a bedroom," Sango showed us a bottle with the word 'Everclear' on the side, "and our dear Saiyan Prince will be helpless…" she grinned evilly.

"Meep!" I stared at the bottle, "I thought they stopped making that stuff!"

"They did, but I managed to get an entire pint. And I figure that for a Saiyan, that should be enough. I know this much would kill you or I," she answered.

"Hey guys!" Rogue walked in, "Mike told me to come in here cause something freaky was happening. Oh, yeah. And Vegeta just got back."

"Let's fill you in on this 'freaky' thing that's happening and I think, after you hear it, you won't be thinking freaky anymore. No, no, no. It'll be more along the lines of 'lucky' and 'fun'…" I grinned.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: Wow… Holy fucking shit! IT'S BEEN AN ENTIRE YEAR PEOPLE! I HAVE BEEN WRITING THIS STORY FOR A YEAR!! O.O Wow… I'm awed… I never knew it would be this long… in both time and story length. *shakes head* This is a sign that I need a life, ne?

Kakarot: Wow. A week has spanned a year…

Vegeta: You… need a life.

Jeril: Never! Anyway, free chibi Vegetas and Kakarots for all! *tosses all the chibi dolls to the reviewers* They even go Super Saiyan if you poke them in the eye. ^_~ *lol*

Vegeta: You're just sick… *watches as Jeril pokes the chibi Vegeta doll in the eye and giggles as it goes Super Saiyan*

**Story Advertising: **The Firebird Saga  – Story ID = 521448 – A fic telling the never before heard of Son Goken and the Firebird who posses him. Yus, another new son of Kakarot but wait! This one is good and worth the read! Truly! If you're looking for a good fic, read it. ^_~


	56. A complete personality 180

Vegeta dropped off in the kitchen what little food he had left over and, carrying the candy he had brought back, then headed to the laundry room. He opened the door to the attic only to see his son being snuggled by the girl, Vicky, while Goten and Zar played a game of chess. Vegeta placed the candy he had taken at the supermarket inside the attic and gave his son a look.

Chibi Trunks mouthed back at him, "Help me!"

Vegeta shook his head and closed the door. "I can't believe he can't handle a human girl by himself…" Vegeta muttered as he entered 'his' bedroom.

"Hello Veggie!" a girl he had never met before grinned at him from where she sat on the bed, her black cloak spread out around her.

"Who're you?" Vegeta growled.

"The name's Sango! Nice to meet you!"

"Get out."

"I'm afraid I can't do that."

"And why not?"

"Because I have a bet for you."

"I don't gamble."

"Really?" she looked thoughtful, "Are you afraid to lose?"

"No!" he snarled, "I just don't like wasting my time on useless activities!"

"Okay, I respect that!" she stood up and held her hands up, "If you're too chicken shit to just do one, little bet, I understand. No harm done."

"Chicken shit?" Vegeta growled.

"Yeah, chicken shit."

"I. Am. Not. Chicken shit."

"You are in my book."

"What is this bet?"

"It's simple really," Sango pulled out of a pocket on the inside of her cloak a bottle of what appeared to be water, "I bet that you can't chug all of this in one go."

"What is it?" He eyed the bottle.

"Well, the people of my plant call it 'firewater' and it used to be pretty popular though none of my people can drink this much."

"And if I do?"

"I will be your slave for the rest of my life."

Vegeta arched an eyebrow. The last time he had had a personal slave was before he had came to Earth, "And if I lose?"

"You'll be mine," Sango grinned demonically, "Forever…"

Vegeta thought for a moment. If he lost, like hell he would be her slave. He would just kill her. But if he won… "All right, hand it over." Sango complied, grinning like the Cheshire cat, and watched as he inspected the bottle.

"It's not like I poisoned it or anything," she said after a long pause in which he stood, staring at the bottle.

"If you had, I would be able to smell it," Vegeta stated as he unscrewed the top and sniffed the liquid, "And I doubt any of the poisons on this pathetic planet of yours would be strong enough to kill or even harm me." A label was stuck on the bottle that read 'Everclear'. Vegeta smirked. He knew that drink.

Slightly tangy but pleasing to the taste buds, Everclear was a fruit juice from Frieza's people's planet. It was drained from the newly ripened aisu fruit and then chilled for one hundred years in six-foot thick iron vats. After that time, it was no longer poisonous and barely acidic at all. Vegeta had had it a few times over the years and thought it was quite good. As he brought the mouth of the bottle to his lips, Sango reminded him, "All in one go, mind you!"

As the clear liquid flowed into his mouth, Vegeta noticed something odd. It was tasteless. Then something else came to his attention and he would have screamed if he had not had his mouth full. The harmless looking liquid burned like fire! He nearly spit it out but remembered the bet. To lose now was unthinkable. He steeled himself and began to guzzle down the liquid as fast as he could. The Saiyan no Ouji would not stand down from a challenge issued a mere human!

Sango chuckled quietly to herself and rubbed her hands together as she watched Vegeta down the nearly pure alcohol. Yes, tonight was going to be quite a night to remember…

I waited outside the bedroom door with Bana and Rogue. I was so excited I could barely think straight. "I can't believe this! We're going to be around an inebriated Vegeta! This is every Vegeta fan's dream! I mean, we could probably ask him any question we wanted, and he'd answer it truthfully! That happens to some people when they get drunk, you know. They can't lie."

"Or else he could try to power up and fry us all," Rogue said.

Bana was checking her 'supplies.' "Twister, pack of cards, snacks, drinks…" At the last one she smiled evilly, "You think that Sango girl's gotten Vegeta to drink the Everclear yet?"

"Probably."

"Then why hasn't she opened the door yet?"

The door creaked open and Sango peeked out, "Psst, c'mon!"

"Why speak of the devil…" Bana, Rogue and I filed inside the room quickly and quietly.

"Where'd Veggie go?" Bana asked, looking around.

"The bathroom." Sango pointed to the mentioned area.

"Oh, well, I'm gonna set up the Twister game!" Bana pulled out the mat and spread it on the floor.

"What are the cards for?" Sango asked.

I grinned evilly. "Strip poker."

She grinned back. "Nice. Very nice."

"Voices?" Vegeta's voice came from the bathroom as the sound of the toilet flushing was heard, "I heard voices!" He staggered out.

"Is he drunk already?" Rogue asked.

"Yup! Saiyan's have a fast metabolism, remember? He's pretty gone…" Sango said as she watched Vegeta stumble to the side of the bed and sit down. "He'll probably blackout…"

Bana pulled out the Twister board, "Well, shall we begin?"

"What's that?" Vegeta asked, looking over at the mat.

Bana explained the basic principles of Twister to Vegeta. "Sounds like fun!" Vegeta clapped, "Let's play!"

"Dude, did I just hear what I think I heard?" I asked Rogue.

"He sounded… excited…" Sango stared at Vegeta.

"C'mon! Spin it!" Vegeta said, taking off his socks.

"Right… I'll take the first turn spinning the board." I picked up the board and spun it as the four lined up, "Right hand red!"

Many spins later and after a few collapses and quite odd, and not necessarily unpleasant, contortions, the Twister game ended. "Wow… I never thought I would get such a nice view of Veggie's ass…" commented Bana.

"Yeah, and when his crotch was right in front of my face…" I shook my head, "Man, I think I have never seen anything so nice in my entire life… It was just like _bam!_ Right there! Oh how droolable… so droolable…"

"Mmmmm… how about some poker, Veggie-chan?" Sango said, smirking.

"Okay!" Vegeta exclaimed.

"I think his personality goes through a complete reversal when drunk…" Rogue commented.

"Yeah, sure sounds like it." I agreed, listening to Vegeta drone on and on about how he loved card games and they were so fun and Nappa and him used to play 'Go Fish' all the time but then Nappa died and he had no one to play with except that nasty Kakarot who could not even figure out the rules to 'Go Fish' and ooooo, how that Kakarot made him so mad at times he just wanted to kill him and blah, blah, blah.

I stared at the Saiyan no Ouji. "Hooo boy… Now I know why he never drinks… this is so embarrassing… Complete personality 180…"

"Blackmail time!" Bana announced, whipping out her camera and snapped a pic of Vegeta in mid sentence. He blinked, stared at her for a minute and then grinned. "Picture time!" he held out his hand in the 'V' for Victory sign as Bana took another picture.

"C'mon! Group pic!" Sango called out and took the camera then shooed the rest over to the intoxicated Saiyan. "Pose, people, pose!" She snapped a few pictures of the group and then they all settled down to play a game of strip poker. Of course, Vegeta, being more then slightly drunk, lost completely and, once more because of the fact that he was drunk, stripped down. The girls took more photos, ate, watched TV and partied the rest of the night.

Finally, at somewhere around one in the morning, Vegeta passed out on the bed and the girls left the room, much to the disappointment of some of them. "C'mon!" I said, "Did you see how messed up he was? He wouldn't remember it at all! Please?"

"No! I will not allow any of you to take advantage of the Saiyan no Ouji in such a state of mind and body!" Sango proclaimed.

"Dammit!" Bana growled.

I sighed and changed the subject. You just couldn't argue with some people, "Are you going to stay the night?"

"No, I must leave. It's been fun and all. Nice knowing you!" she disappeared into the shadows of the dark hallway.

"She's an odd one…" Bana commented.

"Yeah…" Rogue nodded, yawning.

"We could go back now!" Bana said excitedly.

"Don't even think about it…" a voice growled from the shadows.

I gave the others a look, "Well, I don't know about you guys but I hear a bed calling my name," I said as I headed to my room. They reluctantly followed me.

"The floor's looking really good right now." Bana rubbed her eyes and yawned too.

Bana and Rogue pulled a few blankets into place on my floor and collapsed on them while I crawled into my bed. My hand knocked something off of my dresser and I bent over the side of the bed to grab it.

I picked up the Dragonball radar from where it had landed and hid a yawn behind my hand when I became aware of a soft beeping noise. I looked at the device in my other hand and froze. A flashing light met my eyes. "Holy shit…" I whispered as I stared at the flashing light on the radar's screen. "No fucking way!"

"What is it?" Bana mumbled sleepily.

"Dude, there's a Dragonball within a fifteen feet radius of us."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bleh, I want the plot to go faster… _ It's nearly done and I have so many other projects I must work on… So, I cut off an entire day of the fic. *is hit by rotten tomatoes and rocks* Gomen, but I didn't have anything planned for that day! *runs away to hide*

If there are any mistakes in this chap or some parts are meant to be funny and are not, it's due to lack of sleep. I stayed up late writing this and so… yeah… I can't think… I gotta go sleep… sleep… zzzzzz…

P.S. If any of you have seen Trigun, please check out my fanfic. Please? *begs* It's good, I swear! You won't regret it!


	57. Come out with your hands up!

"Say what?" Rogue sat up and stared at me.

"There's a dragonball within a fifteen foot radius of this radar," I repeated.

"Man, are you just fucking with us?" Bana asked, sitting up also.

"I'd like to be, but no. Look for yourself." I showed them the screen that proved my statement.

"Dragonballs on the Earth? And we didn't know? Damn it! I could have wished for Vegeta as my own personal slave long ago!" Bana ranted.

"Dude, let's go on a dragonball hunt!" I bounced out of my bed and began searching my room for the dragonball, "Where is it? Why is it in my room? How could I have not found it before now and recognized it for what it was?" I asked as I tore apart my closet.

"We can't answer those questions so stop asking," Rogue said simply as she and Bana stood behind me, dodging the things I threw inadvertently at them as I took them out of the closet.

"But why?" I found suddenly I had run out of things to remove from my closet, "Dammit… it's not in there…"

"Where else could it be?" Bana asked, looking around at my room.

"The only other place is my shelves… and you could see it if it was there…" I tried to think.

"Under your bed?" Rogue asked.

"Dude! Right!" I dashed over to the bed and dove under, happily clawing through the mess in a search for the dragonball. "Socks… banana… Barbies, gotta burn those… books… more books… box of golf balls…" the list went on and on.

I finally crawled out from under my bed, covered from head to foot in dust. "It's not under there either!"

Bana checked the radar. "Well, the device made by the Dragonball Z world's greatest genius says it's under there."

"Give me that! You must be reading it wrong!" I grabbed the radar and looked at it, fuming.

"See a difference?"

"Shut up!" I went back under the bed, looking more carefully now.

"Maybe it's broken and there are no dragonballs here…" Rogue mused.

"No! It's not true! There has to be dragonballs on our Earth! I have so many wishes!" Bana cried out.

"Dammit! It's not here!" I yelled, picking up a box and throwing it against my wall. It made a large, satisfying crashing sound and flung golf balls everywhere.

"Calm down. We'll find it!" Bana exclaimed.

"The radar's malfunctioning. That's the bottom line. I'm going to bed. Good night." Rogue shook her head at my reaction as she crawled under her blankets. I sighed and sat down on my bed, picking up a golf ball that had landed on my bed. I rolled it around in my hand for a moment before dropping it.

Bana stood, looking at the floor. "It's got to be around here somewhere…" she sat on her blankets and sighed also. My eyes traced idly over the white golf balls scattered over my room. Why were there golf balls under my bed? I hated golf. Stupid sport that wasn't even a sport… Then I noticed something odd.

In the corner of my room, by my closet, there was an odd colored, hunter green golf ball just sitting there. I stood and walked over, bending down to pick it up. I stared at it closely. It didn't feel like a golf ball. It was smooth on the outside. As I looked at the ball closely, I saw inside of it where three red stars were floating.

I pumped my fist clutching the small sphere into the air, "Bana! It's the three-star dragonball!" I whooped and tossed the dragonball at her.

She caught it and stared, slack-jawed, at the phenomena that she held in her hand. "Holy shit…" She looked up at me, "Do you know what this means?"

"We can have whatever we want." I grinned.

"Exactly."

"What? The dragonballs _are_ real?" Rogue sat up.

Bana threw the orb to Rogue, "See, unbeliever? The impossible has been made possible!"

Rogue stared at the dragonball. "Wow… why is it such an ugly color?"

"I like the color!" I said and then exclaimed, "With my wish, I'm going to become a world-renowned author and then make my own anime!" I danced around the room.

"I'm going to become a rock star!" Bana jumped up and clapped her hands.

"With the help of the dragonballs, I shall take over the world!" Rogue threw back her head and laughed. Bana and I sweatdropped and gave her a look.

"Right…" Bana nodded, "You do that…"

"We need to find the rest first, and that's going to take a while…" I said, checking the radar, "They're scattered all over the planet and you know how slow our transportation is… We should enlist the help of Kakarot!"

"Yes, with his Instant Transmission thing, we'll get them all in no time at all!" Bana exclaimed.

"We'll have to continue this search in the morning though. It's too late to start now." Rogue said, pointing out the time: 1:33 a.m.

"Yeah, true." I put the dragonball and the radar in a drawer on my bedside table. "G'night all."

"Good night."

"Yeah, night." Bana flipped off the light.

I blinked. The room was still lit. "What the hell…" I muttered, looking out my window. It was night, wasn't it? Yes, it was, but assembled outside my house was a squadron of police cars, all with their lights on and flashing. "Er… guys. We might have a problem…"

"Wake up Kakarot!" I said, shoving the sleeping Saiyan from the couch and then shaking him. "Wake up!"

"Wha? What's the matter?" he muttered.

"What did you do?" I demanded.

"Do what? When?" he blinked sleepily and stared at me.

"There's police outside my house!"

"Why are you asking Goku?" Krillin asked from a chair where he was curled up, "Why not Vegeta?"

"Oh my god…" I stood, staring at the wall. He had been gone for dinner and had not come back till late. What had the stupid Saiyan done in that time frame? I ran to the bedroom he occupied to ask while Mike stumbled out of Zar's room.

"What's up?" the teenage boy asked as I flew by.

"The cops are outside. I think Vegeta might have gone on a killing spree or something while he was gone this afternoon!" I called out.

"Oh… that's bad…" Mike shuffled out to the front door and opened it. He listened to what the cops were blaring out.

"Come out with your hands up! You are harboring a fugitive who is responsible for the injuries of innocent citizens and the destruction of private property! Come out with your hands up!"

"Oh… that _is_ bad…" Mike yawned and closed the door, "I wonder if I'm dreaming…"

"I only killed a few people!" he heard Vegeta's voice roar from the back, "It's not that big of a deal!"

"Oh yeah… this is an odd dream…" Mike nodded to himself and stumbled back to Zar's room.

"Vegeta! This is not your planet! The humans here haven't dealt with people like you! They take it more seriously!" I yelled at the Saiyan.

"They should learn to deal with it then!" Vegeta yelled back, swaying as he stood in front of me.

"God damn stupid drunk Saiyan!" I snarled at him.

"Um, what are we going to do about the cops?" Bana asked from where she stood in the doorway.

"I don't-"

"I'll deal with them!" Vegeta volunteered and walked out of the bedroom.

"No!" I dashed after him and stood in his way, "Don't! I won't let you!"

"Why not?" Not one to be stopped, he pushed me aside to continue his determined walk toward the front door.

"Your way of dealing with people is bad! Evil!" I grabbed the sleeve of his shirt and was dragged along with him.

"Are you saying I have no people skills?" he asked angrily.

"No! I'm saying you have _bad_ people skills!"

"That's nearly the same as saying I have no people skills," he pointed out.

"Shut up!" I yelled at him as he opened the door and walked out onto the front porch with me still clinging to his shirt. I had no choice. If I was to try to stop him, I had to follow him.

"There he is! The culprit!" I heard a police officer yell and watched him point at Vegeta.

"Come out with your hands on your head!" the loudspeaker blasted.

"Like hell!" Vegeta roared back, clumsily trying to dislodge me from his shirt, "Let go, girl!"

"And I quote: Like hell!" I snarled, "You are not going to kill anyone tonight if I have any say in the matter!"

"Technically, it's morning and I'm afraid you have no say whatsoever in my life," Vegeta growled, tearing himself away from me, ripping off his shirt in the process.

Now, being the crazed, obsessed fangirl that I am, what do I do when I see one of my favorite anime characters standing before me with no shirt on? I stand and drool unashamedly of course. _Sexy Saiyan beast… ahhhh… abs… I like, oh I do, I do, I do…_ I thought to myself, feeling my knees get weak.

"You want me? Come and get me!" Vegeta yelled at the cops.

"Oh man… that was corny…" I sighed, the moment broken. I watched as the Saiyan paced back and forth on my porch, bellowing insults and taunts at the police and ranting about how stupid and weak humans were and Saiyans were so superior in every way.

"Man… they are going to think he's so nutty…" I sighed, walking back inside. I had decided Vegeta was going to end up killing people tonight/this morning and there was truly nothing I could do about it. "Besides," I muttered to myself, "the world needs a few less people around. There's so much population pressure these days…"

There was another problem that needed to be solved at the moment. How the hell were we going to get out of the house without getting caught by the cops?

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And once more, Veggie goes on a wild, violent Saiyan spree! Woohoo! The plot I've been trying to get to for weeks now finally appears! w00t!! Yay for plots! Gah, this chap was pretty much pure dialogue. _ I need to stop that…

Okay, I'm going to insert some reviewers into the next chap! It's not going to be a big role, so just review, say you want to be in and tell me your favorite character and your normalish 'net name (such as mine is Jeril).


	58. Wrap it up and let's get out of here!

"I wonder if this is on the news…" Krillin muttered, turning on the TV and flipping to the local news channel.

A sketch of Vegeta was being shown, "-picture of the perpetrator. After assaulting a group of young boys and seriously injuring two of them, he went to a nearby supermarket, stole a vast amount of food and then assaulted the staff and security guards there. He then detonated a bomb, bringing down the roof of the building and killing five innocent citizens and hospitalizing many more. He was seen at a park later that day where onlookers claimed he threatened a small boy and a teenage. Now, the police have tracked him to a home in the rural area of town." The picture changed to badly filmed shot of the house where they were located, showing Vegeta to be on the porch, taunting and insulting the police force. 

"Currently, the situation is unstable. The murderer is standing out on the porch of the house, yelling at the police while the police are trying to devise a way of luring the criminal out without endangering the lives of the hostages inside."

"Hostages? What hostages?" Goku asked.

"They think we're hostages?" Krillin turned to give me a look.

"Yeah, our media tends to over exaggerate everything, especially this channel. It's really killing for ratings right now," I explained.

Zar stumbled out of his room, rubbing his sleep-blurred eyes. "What's happening?" he grumbled.

"The cops have surrounded our house and are demanding that Vegeta surrender and he, Vegeta being Vegeta, won't."

"Oh that's nice…" Zar yawned into his hand and then paused mid-yawn, looking at me over his hand, "Wait… this is bad, right?"

"Very."

"You want me to wake everyone up for some sorta emergency meeting thing?"

"That'd be helpful."

"Okay. I'll be back in a few…" Zar turned around and went back to his room to wake Mike and the chibis. I sighed and turned back to look at the television.

A news reporter sat behind her desk, looking very pleased while a little title reading 'Live' flashed in the upper right corner of the screen, "We have just received some calls from locals with information on this horrible event. Hello, what is your name?"

"My name's Leez!" the voice crackled a little as telephone calls tended to sound when on the television.

"Welcome Leez. Now, tell us what you have to say."

"I know who that guy is!"

The reporter's eyes lit up. "Do tell!"

"He's Vegeta! And he's the Prince of all Saiyans! And his son, Trunks, is one sexy beast!"

"Umm…" the reporter looked a little pale, "Thanks. Good-bye. Next caller!"

"Hi, my name's Schizo!"

"Why am I getting all the calls from the weirdos?" the reporter muttered to herself.

"What did you say?"

"Never mind. What's your story?"

"That's Vegeta and damn oh damn! He looks better in real life then in the anime!"

"Anime?" the reporter's brow furrowed.

"You know! Japanimation! Like Speed Racer, Digimon, and Pokémon! Vegeta's from the anime Dragonball Z and-"

"Right. Well, thank you and good-bye." The reported rubbed her temples. "That's all the calls we are going to be taking right now. Over to you, John."

Vegeta stood on the porch, balefully glaring at the police spread out before him. "C'mon, mister! We don't want to have to hurt you!" a cop yelled at the angered Saiyan Prince.

"You couldn't hurt me if you tried, pork chops!" Vegeta sneered and thumb his nose at the slightly plump uniformed law enforcer.

"Why, you short little bastard! I'll beat your ass into the ground!" the cop snarled as one of his companions tried to calm him down.

"My, my, my. The beast can talk. Here piggie, piggie, piggie! Want a donut?" Vegeta smirked.

"Just you wait till we have you in custody, prick. You're not gonna last long." The cop growled, cracking his knuckles.

A few passer-bys stood outside the ring of police. The neighborhood in which they were located had a high traffic rate, even in the early hours of the morning. One of the teenagers stood with her finger tapping her chin as she watched with brilliant blue eyes the man standing on the porch before her. Her silver hair tumbled off her shoulders and over the black cape she wore. "I know him… I know I do… but from where?" she murmured to herself, her brows furrowed in thought.

"What's wrong Misaki?" a guy standing next to her asked. He wore a black jacket, white t-shirt and a slightly faded pair of blue jeans.

"Does that hott guy look familiar to you, S3?" the girl, Misaki, asked.

"Hmmm… now that you mention it, ya, he does."

"But who is he?"

"I know his name, but I can't put my name on it…" S3 scratched his head.

Suddenly, the man yelled out, "Final Flash!" and a beam of energy shot out and vaporized a few of the cops present and exploded a nearby patrol car.

"Oh my god! It's Vegeta!" the girl Misaki screamed.

"You're right!" S3 exclaimed.

"He's even sexier in reality!"

"Hey, we gotta get out of here! If that's Vegeta, this place is gonna become a war zone in the next few minutes!" S3 grabbed his companion's arm and dragged her away.

"But it's Vegeta! Noooooooo!"

"Where did S'rac, J'dee and that Vicky kid go?" I asked Zar as the demi-Saiyans and others made themselves comfortable in the living room.

"When you, Rogue, and Bana were missing, Mike used your car and took them to their homes and J'dee to her hotel."

"Ah, okay," I turned to the small group and called for attention, "All right people. Here's our situation: Vegeta is wanted by the cops, we're out of food and money and I've found a dragonball." I held up the green orb.

"That's a funny colored dragonball," Krillin said, taking it from me and looking at it closely.

"There are dragonballs on our planet?" Mike asked, snatching the dragonball from Krillin, "Wow, I never thought I'd get to see one of these…"

"We can wish for more food then!" Goku grinned.

"Kakarot, you baka. That's a waste of a wish," I growled.

"But I'm so hungry…" the Saiyan put a hand on his stomach.

"Live with it. Life is pain."

"We should put the wish to a better purpose. Like sending them all home," Mike said.

"Wow, Mike. I would have never thought of that!" I exclaimed sarcastically.

"Yeah, I know. I'm just too smart for you."

"We're gonna have to go home?" Chibi Trunks looked sad.

"I bet your mom's really worried," Zar said, "I know if I went missing for a few days, my mom would flip out and call the cops, State Troopers and everyone else."

"But I've been having fun here!" Goten whined.

"Your mom's got a lot of food at your house and we have none here," Bana told the boy.

"I want to go home!"

"That's what I thought." Bana grinned.

"All right. Kakarot, go get Vegeta," I ordered.

"Can't we just leave him here?" Krillin asked but cowered down when Bana, Rogue and I shot a death glare at him, "Never mind…"

Goku nodded and walked out of the living room and opened the front door. He poked his head out. "Hey Vegeta, wrap it up out here. Hurry up and come inside."

"Why should I listen to you Kakarot?" Vegeta growled, turning to glare at the other Saiyan.

"Well, if you want to go home, you should come inside. But, we can leave you here if you want to stay," Goku shrugged, "Although I think Bulma would be pretty mad and probably chase you here to this dimension and then thrash you good."

"How should I 'wrap this up'?"

"Well, they think we're your hostages so tell them to give you an hour to prepare for your surrender or you'll kill your hostages."

"I will not surrender to this scum!" Vegeta snarled.

"Don't worry, Vegeta old buddy. You won't have to actually surrender. Just say you are."

"Don't ever call me 'buddy' again, Kakarot."

"Okay, buddy." Goku grinned as he closed the door. He headed back to the living room. "Vegeta will be here in a moment," he told the group.

"Okay. I guess we should grab some stuff we might need." I grabbed a backpack that was lying around and dumped the stuff out of it. In the front pocket, I put the dragonball and the dragonball radar. "You people," I said to the characters from the Dragonball Z Universe, "might want to grab anything you want to bring because I don't think you're going to be back here. Ever."

Goten and Trunks went off to get a few things as Vegeta entered the room. I told him the same thing and so he went back to his room. I gave the backpack to Mike and sent him off to the kitchen to try to find anything that might be left over that we could take with us.

I turned to Bana and Rogue. "You two leaving?"

Bana sighed. "As much as I'd like to come with you and see the Eternal Dragon of our Earth, I think I've been gone from my home long enough and my mom's probably going to kill me when I do get back."

I looked at Rogue. "Same thing goes for me pretty much though I'd really love to come along and kick Krillin around a bit more." She grinned and laughed.

"I'll be thinking of you guys," I promised.

"What if there is more then one wish?" Bana asked.

"Like hell I'll wish for anything for you two!" I laughed, sticking my tongue out at them.

"Bitch!" Rogue jokingly said and laughed with Bana and I.

After a few minutes, everyone had returned. Goten had one of Zar's backpacks with his and Trunks' stuff inside, I presumed, and Vegeta had changed back into his spandex body suit with armor. The backpack Mike held looked a little full, so I surmised he had found a few edibles and held them in the bag. 

"All right people! Follow me!" I lead everyone to the window at the end of the hall where we climbed out and onto the roof. I waited to be the last one up and stood by the window to say good-bye to Bana and Rogue.

"See you soon?" I asked Bana, giving her a hug.

"Yup, as soon as you get back!" she smiled.

I turned to my other friend. "Hey Rogue. You think you can set something up to make it not so odd that we all just vanish off the roof without a trace?"

"Why are you going up on the roof anyway?" she asked.

"I dunno. I like the roof."

"Right… well, just leave it to old Rogue. I've already got something in mind," she grinned and gave me the look that said she was plotting something.

I had a bad feeling about it, but I trusted my friend. "All right. Well, bye!" I swung out the window and clambered up onto the roof.

Rogue turned and strode back down the hall, through the living room and then into the kitchen. Bana trailed after her, interested in what distraction Rogue was going to come up with. Rogue opened up the cabinet under the kitchen sink and began pulling out spray cans. "Hmm… Foam cleaner…" she read the back panel, "Nope. Carpet cleaner?" Once again she read the back panel, "Wrong again. Aha! Dusting spray!" she grinned as she read the back panel. "Bingo!" She shook it up and pulled open a kitchen drawer and grabbed a lighter out of it.

"Rogue, what're you doing?" Bana asked, following her friend as she walked back into a bedroom.

"Oh, I'm just gonna set the house on fire."

"What? Dude, this isn't your house!" Bana stopped in the bedroom doorframe.

"Yeah."

"She's gonna kill you!"

"I'm moving in two days." Rogue grinned as she set the bed and dresser on fire.

Bana backed out of the room, followed closely by Rogue who then hurried to the living room and began catching the sofa and coffee table on fire. "Man, this is so not cool!"

"Bana," Rogue turned to her friend, smiling. The fire behind her gave her an eerie backdrop and the shadows played across her face creepily, "This will be good cover up for them, if they wait till the flames block them from view. I also have the feeling that she's not coming back and she's going to go with the DBZ guys. I know I would."

"Then why didn't you go with her now?"

"Because I've got a few things to wrap up here on Earth and in a year, or however long the dragonballs take to reactivate, I'll wish myself there. I found some schematics on a dragonball radar lying around Zar's room. Trunks dropped them," she waved the paper in front of Bana's face.

"Really? Awesome! Take me with you when you go on your hunt!"

"Okay, but let's get out of here," Rogue looked back at the blaze creeping slowly down the hallway and the living room that was being consumed by rich, red flames. "I don't think this is the safest place to be now."

Bana nodded and the two took off running out of the house. They ran through the front yard and into the police officers waiting there. "Officer!" Bana gasped, "He has all the others on the roof! We just barely managed to escape!"

"That demon set the house on fire!" Rogue sobbed, winking at Bana at an angle the police could not see.

"Oh my god! They're going to be roasted alive up there!" a cop stared in horror up at the roof.

Bana turned to answer a question that another police officer had asked her and then stopped. She stared in a look of dismay at a couple in the crowd and slowly shifted back to look to Rogue. "Rogue," Bana pointed to the couple, "those are Bouke's parents."

"Oh fuck…" Rogue paled, "I forgot about them…"

"Yeah… they own the house too…"

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Eh heh heh… um, yeah. If anyone is related to cops or is a cop or supports cops or anything and is insulted by the insults Vegeta used, sorry but he is Vegeta after all. ^_^;; Heh heh…

Sorry if any of you reviewers whom I inserted are disappointed with the amount of "screen time" you got. I told you the parts were gonna be short…

Anyway, I tried to incorporate some more detail into this chap. I think I did a little better.

w00t! 800 reivews!! I love you all! Thanks a whole lot!! ^_^


	59. You gotta be shittin’ me!

"Kakarot," I gave him the dragonball radar, "Find a ki close to one of the dragonballs and transport us there."

"Okay." Kakarot looked at the radar and then closed his eyes, searching for a ki.

"Hey… is it just me or is the roof a little hot?" Trunks asked, shifting his feet around.

"Yeah… it is…" Goten agreed, using his ki to lift himself up a few inches off the roof.

"Why aren't you two wearing any shoes?" I growled.

"I forgot mine in the rush up here…" Trunks said.

Goten nodded. "Me too."

"Kami damn it… I'll go get your shoes. Hang on a minute. I'll be right back." I walked back over to the side of the roof, muttering a few choice curses under my breath as I swung over the side and in the window. A raging inferno greeted my eyes as smoke blew in my face. I coughed and spluttered, turning around and reaching blindly for the window my only route out of the burning building. With more then a little luck, I managed to crawl back onto the roof, gasping for the cleaner air that was located there.

"Shit! Are you okay Bo?" Mike exclaimed, dashing to my side and helping me up.

"Something's burning!" Kakarot's eyes snapped open as he sniffed the air.

"No shit! The house is burning down!" I snarled, "Get us the hell out of here!"

"My stuff!" Zar howled.

"My poor computer…" I felt a tear form in my eye. "Damn you Rogue… That's a little _too_ good of a distraction…"

Vegeta slammed a hand down on Kakarot's shoulder, gripping it hard. "Get us out of here. Now!" he barked. Mike grabbed my hand and dragged me over to Kakarot so he could hold onto the Saiyan's other shoulder. Zar seized my other hand and Trunks' as Goten clutched his demi-Saiyan friend's hand.

"Everyone ready?" Kakarot asked, stuffing the dragonball radar in the backpack Mike was carrying.

"Leave already!" I screamed as I the roof began to catch on fire, the flames advancing toward us.

"I'm too young to die…" Mike whimpered as Kakarot put his fingers to his forehead and his brow furrowed.

The roof and flames suddenly faded from view and for a few moments, the group floated in a black nothingness with all their senses cut off. Then their feet touched down on a surface and they were surrounded by a dark green and black blur. Slowly, a quiet, large forest came into focus along with a cave mouth just a few steps away from them. A startled hiker looked at them then turned around and ran the other way.

I let go of Zar and Mike's hands and then opened up the backpack, pulling out the radar. "Now where is the little bugger?" I murmured, studying the screen. I turned to face the cave. "Oh God damn it!" I growled.

"What's wrong?" Mike asked, peeking over my shoulder at the radar's display. "Is it in the cave?"

"Yes and I hate the dark…" I shivered. There was something about the night that scared me. Maybe it was the fact that I was not able to see anything, maybe it was because I had seen one to many horror movies but most likely, the reason was that the dark represented to me the unknown and we humans tend to fear what we do not know and understand.

Vegeta laughed at my fear. "Foolish girl, afraid of the stupidest things. We Saiyans are naturally equipped with superior night vision. Night is nothing to me and there's nothing in a cave that could possibly be a threat to me. " He took the radar out of my hands and then strode into the cave, his arrogant nature leaking from every pore. The rest of us stood and waited for him to return.

After a few moments, he walked back out. He looked pale and a little shaken. "Vegeta, is something wrong?" Kakarot asked.

"No! Nothing is wrong!" he growled and stormed back into the cave.

"What do you think is in there?" I asked Mike.

"I don't know…" he shrugged.

Suddenly, we heard a shrill scream ensue from the cave and Vegeta came running out, his face panicked. Following him was a large, black cloud.

I backed up a few steps. "What the-"

"Bats!" Vegeta cried out, dashing to the group, "Keep them away!"

"Cool!" Trunks yelled.

"Are they vampire bats?" Zar asked, jumping up and trying to grab one. "If I catch one, can I keep it, Bo?"

"Certainly not! Don't even touch them! Do you know how dirty those things are?" I growled.

After a few minutes of much confusion and yelling, the bats finally all flew out of the cave and away into the dark night sky. I turned to the Saiyan Prince who was running his hands through his hair, muttering about bats and messing up his hair. He had dropped the radar on the ground in his haste. "And someone was saying something earlier about foolish fears?"

"Shut up, bitch," Vegeta kicked the radar over to me, "You go in there and get the stupid thing!"

"Fine! I will!" I growled pushing my fear to the back of my mind. I picked up the radar and stomped into the cave (though a bit of the way in my stomping turned to squishing). There was bat guano covering the floor and it was heaped up in piles in some areas. I groaned. "Disgusting…" I used the radar as a guide as I ventured deeper into the cave. Only by its faint glow could I see where I was going.

Finally, I stopped in front of a particularly tall pile of bat guano. "You gotta be shittin' me!" I screamed.

"Bo, you having any problems?" Mike called out from the cave's entrance.

"Yeah, I am! I'll be out in a minute!" I yelled back. I turned to the pile once more. I set the radar down on a bare patch of dirt, the only one around, and hissed at the pile of guano, "Okay, shit! I'll get that dragonball out of you if it's the last thing I do!"

I whipped off my jacket and put it on backwards so that the back was protecting my front but my arms were still in the sleeves. I grabbed the ends and bunched them up in my fists so that nothing could get through the hand holes. I exclaimed, "I am prepared!" Turning back to the pile for the last time, I laughed and dove in, digging for the hidden dragonball.

Within a minute of furious searching, I had found the shiny little object and wiped it clean on my jacket. "Hah! Take that, shit! I defeated you!" I kicked the pile of guano and instantly regretted it. The bat shit now covered half of my leg. I groaned in disgust as I peeled off the jacket and left it for dead, draped over the pile of guano. I picked the radar and holding that in one hand and the dragonball in the other, exited the cave.

"Get it?" Kakarot asked as I emerged from the cave.

"Yeah, but it was hidden in a pile of bat guano so I'm wanting to wash it off along with my hands," I answered.

"I hear a stream from over here," Mike offered.

"Lead me to it!"

The stream was fast running and soon both my hands and the dragonball were clean and as fresh as a daisy on a sunny summer day. "What's bat guano?" Trunks asked as I dried off my hands on my pants, the parts that were smeared with guano.

I dropped the dragonball in Mike's backpack. "Bat shit." Vegeta and the chibis burst into laughter. "So you think that's funny?" I growled at them.

"Hilarious!" Vegeta smirked.

"Laugh at this!" I snarled, cupping my hand and scraping a handful of guano off my pants and hurling at the Saiyan. Caught by surprise, the nasty treat hit him in the face, splatting on his forehead and in his hair. His face was blank for a moment and then it contorted into a look of hate. "I'm going to rip off all of your limbs!" he yelled in rage.

"Just wash it off, Vegeta. But then again, you look better with it on. It covers that huge ass widow's peak of yours." I stuck my tongue out at the angry Saiyan.

"Little bitch!" He launched himself at me but Kakarot intercepted him.

"C'mon Vegeta. You've been being mean to her. It's only fair," Kakarot said, trying to calm down the Saiyan who was snarling and struggling in Kakarot's strong grip.

Vegeta's vein pulsed and throbbed as he took a deep breath and relaxed. In a voice that said he was far from calm, he answered, "All right. I won't kill her." Kakarot smiled and let him go. Vegeta turned to glare at me. "This time."

"Oooo… I'm so scared!" I mocked him, as I knelt by the stream again to wash my hands.

After both Vegeta and I had cleaned up, we got the group together again and Kakarot once more searched for a ki closest to the nearest dragonball. "Hmmm… that's odd…" he murmured.

"What's odd, daddy?" Goten asked.

"There's no one really close to the dragonball… Ah! Found someone." The forest faded quickly from view and again we were floating in the black nothingness that deprived us of all senses.

The scenery that we arrived at this time was a beach with the vast, blue ocean spreading out before us. The sun was just rising and a group of surfers were heading toward the ocean, obviously trying to beat the crowd that would appear later. One of the surfers had stopped behind his buddies though and was staring at us. "Dude…" he murmured with wide eyes.

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Jeril: Just two or three more chaps left… *sniffles* I don't know how I'm going to live without this. *lol* It'll be weird after having to write this for over a year, no longer having to worry about updating it. *sigh*

Vegeta: That's very sad and pathetic. I have three words of advice for you, human. Get. A. Life.

Jeril: So says the man who spends all of his free time training?

Kakarot: She's got a point Vegeta…

Vegeta: Kakarot, shut up! *blasts Kakarot*

Jeril: *ignores the Saiyans* School's almost out for me!! I just have to wait till the fourth… and then nine days until my birthday!! Woohoo!! ^_^ Maybe I should put the last chap up on my birthday… that'd be pretty spiffy! ^_^ I think I will! So, everyone look on the 13th of June for the last chapter!!


	60. Surfers, the damned hell spawn of Lucife...

The surfer holding his board upright and staring at us as we looked around and got our bearings. Then he spoke, "Whoa! You dudes just appeared out of nowhere!"

Another surfer with a large, fiery hawk tattoo spread out on his back between his shoulder blades looked at his buddy. "Dude! Seriously?"

"Dude! Seriously! They weren't there a few seconds ago!"

"Sweet!" the blond surfer exclaimed.

"Yeah, man! It was crazy! I was just standing here, right? And then all of sudden, they were there! And I was like 'Whoa!' And then I said, 'Whoa!!' And then I was like, 'Dude!'" he nodded solemnly.

"Dude…" the tattooed surfer nodded his head, agreeing.

"Sweet…" the blond nodded too.

"Dudes… you people need help…" I said, shaking my head sadly.

"Dude! You just said 'dude!'" The first surfer (whom I shall call Board for lack of a better name) was amazed.

"Dude! No way?" Tattoo said.

"Dude! Way!" Board answered.

"Sweet…" Blond murmured.

I rolled my eyes and withdrew the dragonball radar out of the backpack. I checked the reading. "It says… it's out there." I pointed at the vast ocean sprawling out before us, glittering in the newly risen sunlight.

"What's that?" Tattoo asked, looking at the radar. The surfer group had been steadily moving closer to us as they had talked and now they practically stood on our toes.

"It's a radar," Mike answered.

"Shibby!" Board exclaimed and reached for the dragonball radar.

"Touch it and I bite your hand off," I growled at the surfer.

"Seriously?" he withdrew his hand and gave me a funny look.

"Yes, I do not joke." I hissed and gnashed my teeth at him.

He blinked and backed up a few steps. "Freak…" he muttered. I glared daggers at the surfer and took a menacing step forward.

Kakarot cut in before I attacked. "So, do you want me to go get the dragonball?" He took the radar out of my hands.

"Yeah. Sure, I guess.."

"All right." Kakarot leapt into the air and took off over the ocean, his energy aura leaving a streak of light behind him as he used the radar to guide him to the dragonball.

"Righteous!" Board blinked as his jaw dropped open, "Did you just see what that dude did?"

"That was beyond awesome." Tattoo looked quite stunned.

"Sweet…" The blond gaped.

"Is sweet all you can say?" Zar asked the surfer.

"Nah, little dude. I just like it a lot. It's a sweet word, ya know."

"Uh, using a word to describe itself isn't exactly the best way you could put it," Mike told the surfer.

"Pssh! Like it matters, dude!"

"He would never pass the high school qualifying exam…" Mike muttered to himself.

"Awh, c'mon man! Loosen up! Catch a few waves with me!" Blond grabbed Mike's arm and dragged him out towards the sea.

"I'd rather not." Mike tried to pry the large hand off his upper arm.

"It'll be fun! Trust me!" the surfer flashed a smile full of pearly whites at Mike as they stepped into the salty water. He slid his board into the water, swung Mike onto it and then pushed off into deeper water.

"I don't want to surf!" Mike wailed.

"What are you so afraid of?" the blond asked as he began to scope out the waves coming in.

"I can't swim!"

"Oh… shit… yeah, that's bad…" the blood stood up on the board as a large wave came rolling towards them, "Well, brace yourself, man, and just try to stay on because here it comes!"

"Kami, why me!" Mike howled as the wave came crashing in.

Goku hovered above the blue ocean as he studied the radar. According to the reading, he was directly above where the dragonball should be located. The Saiyan tucked the radar into a pocket so that he would not lose it, took a deep breath and then dove down into the sparkling sea.

He swam down into the dark blue, shimmering depths, searching for the dragonball. He passed by a shark, which inspected him for a moment and then continued on, and a nice sized school of fish that gave him a wide berth.

Goku touched down on the ocean bed and looked around. Where could it be? He pulled out the radar and checked it once more, silently thanking Bulma for thinking to design it so it could be used underwater. Yes, the dragonball was right in front of him. He looked up from the radar and looked around as he put it back in his pocket. There was no dragonball to be seen.

Frustrated and beginning to feel his need for oxygen, Goku swam up to the surface to breath and think for a moment. He recalled what the ocean bed looked like. Sand, stretching out all over, a reef to his left and a bed of huge oysters in front of him. There was nowhere where the dragonball could be…

Oysters? Goku paused. Wait… there was something about the oysters. Goku took a deep breath and dove back down, swimming directly at the oysters. He grabbed onto one of the oyster's lips and pried, straining against the oyster's locked muscles. He growled and powered up to Super Saiyan. The oyster came flying apart, the muscles ripped apart by the mighty Saiyan's strength. Goku dug through the pieces of oyster, searching for something. He found a large pearl nestled among the oyster corpse. Goku put that in his pocket and moved onto the next oyster, continuing on his search for the dragonball.

After the sixth oyster and another trip to the surface, Goku found the navy blue, six-star dragonball. He blasted out of the water and headed back to the group he had left behind.

"You have the dragonball?" I asked Kakarot as he landed on the sandy beach.

"Ah, Kakarot's returned. I was beginning to get worried." Vegeta said sarcastically.

The Saiyan ignored Vegeta and handed me the blue dragonball, "There you go!" He turned to Mike, who was sprawled out on the beach, coughing up salt water in between extreme vulgar obscenities directed towards all surfers who were "the damned hell spawn of Lucifer himself". "What happened to you?" Kakarot asked.

"Damn Blondie over there dragged me surfing with him, not even bothering to ask if I could swim or not!" Mike snarled.

"It's not my fault…" the blond one scuffed his foot on the ground as water dripped off of him.

"Excuse us for a moment," I said to the surfers and turned to my people, "All right. We have the three-star, six-star, and seven-star dragonballs. Kakarot, find the next one." I put the newly acquired blue, six-star dragonball in the backpack as Kakarot studied the radar.

"Why are they all different colors?" Goten asked, his brow furrowed.

"Yeah, green, black and blue. What's the next one gonna be? Purple?" Krillin chuckled.

"I wonder what kind of Kami dwells here…" Piccolo thought aloud as he looked up at the blue sky.

"Well, I know that he's an asshole," I replied, still smarting from my encounter with the angry god's wrath the day before.

"Dude!" the tattooed surfer turned to look my way with a glare that was on fire, "Don't diss God, man! He rocks!"

"Kami has never helped me before. Why should I respect him?" I growled.

"Haven't you seen _Bruce Almighty_, man? That movie rocks! God knows everything, man, and he knows what's best for you!"

"Oh Kami… Christian surfers… What will be next? A plague of locusts?" Then I remembered something, "Wait, do you know Japanese?"

"Hell yeah! I love Japanese! The best language on the planet!" the tattooed man grinned.

"Yeah, we like getting unsubbed, _uncensored_ anime from Japan. It's the shit," Board winked.

"Hentai freaks…"

"What's wrong with hentai?" Tattoo asked.

"Don't get me started on porno, boy!"

"Bo, you ready to go?" Kakarot asked, "I found a ki next to another dragonball and we all are waiting on you."

"Dragonballs…" Blond blinked, "Dudes! It's Vegeta and Goku and Goten and Trunks!"

"Dude, no way!" Board exclaimed.

"Dude, so way!"

"Shibby!" Tattoo yelled.

"Dude, you do not believe how great this is!" Blond exclaimed.

"Yeah, yeah. We've heard it before. Now _leave_," I hissed.

"No way."

"Hey, it's been great talking with you three and I'd like to give you all something." Kakarot cut in. He pulled five large perfect pearls out of his pockets and deposited them in the hands of one of the surfers. "Have a good day."

"Oh… my… God…" Board stared at the pearls.

"No… fucking… way…" Tattoo fell back onto his ass.

"Sweet…" Blond's mouth had dropped down as far as it would hang and a small line of drool dribbled down his chin.

"All right, let's go." Kakarot grabbed my arm and as the other latched on, put his fingers to his head. In mere moments, we were transported to the next location.

I looked around at the plush, expensive looking office we had arrived in. "Eh… where are we?" I asked Kakarot.

He shrugged. "I have no idea but it's in this room somewhere."

"Who are you? Can I help you?" a voice asked us from behind. I turned around quickly, searching for the speaker. She was a pleasant looking woman, standing at about five foot seven inches, with golden brown hair and hazel eyes. She was wearing some snappy business clothes and I don't know why, but as she stood next to her desk, one hand resting on her desk as she leaned against it, she looked quite familiar.

"Um… we're here looking for something…" I didn't really know what to say because my mind was busy trying to figure out who she was.

Mike was holding the radar and trying to pinpoint the location of the dragonball. He walked over to a trophy cabinet and opened it. He took out a small trophy with a copper world globe on top of it. "Vegeta, come here for a second." Vegeta gave Mike a look and Mike heaved a sigh and walked over to the Saiyan Prince. "Can you see if there's a dragonball in this globe? I think they may have put a copper covering over it or something."

As Vegeta began twisting the orb in an attempt to break it open, the lady objected, "What are you doing to my trophy?"

"Can we have it?" Mike asked as he passed Kakarot the radar so he could scope out the next place.

"Why do you want my trophy?"

"Well," a loud crack was heard and Vegeta held out the dragonball to Mike. Mike took it, "Because that was in there."

Vegeta set down the two halves of the covering on the desk along with the trophy's mount. "Just glue it back together and it'll look as good as new." The woman stared at the group as they got together in a circle, made sure everyone was touching Kakarot and then disappeared. She blinked a few times, rubbed her eyes and stared at the spot they had been moments before.

"Holy shit… did mesa just hear what I thought mesa heard?" She moved to sit in her computer chair, staring right through the large monitor. "Did that guy call him 'Vegeta'? Mesa so confused… Was that… no, no… that's impossible…" she shook her head quickly, "Mesa don't fall for silly things like that…" the President of the United States, also known as DeathStorm to those on fanfiction.net, pushed any thoughts of the odd visitors out of her mind as she peered closely at her computer monitor and typed up a review for a fanfiction.

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I have to admit, the surfers were the product of influences from both _Dude, Where's My Car?_ (which I happen to think is one of the stupidest movies ever) and Crush and Squirt from _Finding Nemo_. Crush rocks. *noddles* Did you know the director of the movie voiced him and also wrote the movie? Anyway, yeah…

I hope you enjoyed the chapter. I struggled a bit writing it but I thought it didn't turn out too bad.

I better get cracking on writing these chapters if I'm to end it on the 13th. We've still got how many dragonballs to go? Three? Hmmm… I think I'll post a chapter on the 9th or 10th then, and the last one on the 13th. See you all then!


	61. Just a tad bit nippily outside, wouldn’t...

The scenery that faded in this time was pink, white, tiled… and extremely cramped. I tried to get a better view of the surrounding area but a body blocked my view. No, more than one. I could see Piccolo's hand poking from underneath Kakarot's armpit and Kakarot's back had Vegeta pinned up against a wall. Tangled in one large mess, our entire group was. "Where are we?" I groaned, pushing Mike away from me, as he had been jammed up against me. I only got an inch of room by trying to rearrange myself though, for we were all crammed in a very small space.

"I have no idea," Mike answered, "But it's like a small room or something. Someone find a door! I'm claustrophobic!"

"You have a lot of problems, don't you, human?" Vegeta growled as he felt along the wall for a door.

"I just inherited all the bad luck of the family, that's all…" Mike grumbled back.

"I found it!" Krillin called out and then our large group came tumbling out of the small chamber to land in a twisted heap in a larger room.

"Smooth move, chrome dome," Vegeta said sarcastically as he began to extract himself from the pile of arms, legs, heads and bodies that were all flailing about at once. I looked over at the Saiyan Prince as I pulled myself out from under Goten and Trunks. _Whoa… Vegeta just said 'smooth move'… freaky…_

"Hey, where are we anyway?" Zar spoke aloud, looking up from where his head lay on the ground… and right beneath the dress of a very attractive woman. "Wow… I don't know where we are… but it's nice, you know?"

"What the-" the lady looked down and shrieked loudly, "You dirty little pervert!" she stomped down on Zar's hand as he brought it up to protect his face.

I jumped up to my feet. "Hey, lady! Don't kill him! He doesn't deserve it! This just a misunderstanding!"

"What the hell are all of you doing in the ladies' restroom?" the woman snarled, giving us all an angry look, "And why were you all in the same stall, for Christ's sake? I could have sworn you weren't in here when I walked in…" She looked at Piccolo and her brow furrowed, "What disease do you have?"

"He doesn't drink enough milk!" Zar piped up, "That's what happens when you don't drink milk!"

"Um… right…" the lady looked at Zar with a slightly suspicious look.

"What?" Zar grinned innocently back, a devilish gleam twinkling in his eye. The lady just stared back. Finally, she turned and was just about to leave when Zar said, "So… does it get a little stuffy down there? Is that why you like to, heh, air it out?" In one swift movement, the lady swirled around swinging her handbag lethally. The large object made solid contact with my little brother's head. _WHAM!_

I laughed slightly as he lay sprawled out on the floor, "Well, he deserved that one most definitely… nasty boy child…"

The woman walked out in a huff and we all were left alone. I grabbed the radar and checked the position of the next dragonball. "Where is it?" Goten asked.

"Second star on the right and straight on till morning," I said with a little half-smile.

"What?" he looked confused.

"You know, Peter Pan and Never Never Land? Tinkerbell, Captain Hook, Wendy, and her two brothers?" He stared at me blankly. "Awh, for Kami's sake, how can you not know Peter Pan and Tinkerbell? They rock! Pixie dust, all the way!"

"Pixie dust?" Trunks cocked his head and looked at me quizzically.

I sighed, "God… never mind. Now, seriously, let's get out of here. I feel pretty weird as the only girl in a group of guys in the ladies' bathroom…" Piccolo cleared his throat and gave me a look. I rolled my eyes, "Oh, right, my bad. The only girl in a group of guys and one asexual pickle man, like that makes any difference! You might as well be a man for all I, and your fangirls, care! The day I see you in a skirt and a tight tank-top will be the day I will call you truly asexual!"

Piccolo blinked, "That will never happen. I prefer my _normal_ clothes, thank you very much."

"Normal?" Mike laughed as we all filed out of the restroom, getting a lot of odd looks from passer-bys, "Calling your turban and cape normal clothes is like saying that if we were to meet a talking pig, nothing would be out of the ordinary."

"What about Oolong?" Goten asked.

"Argh, I'm talking about our dimension. Things like that don't happen here."

"Wow, you must have some pretty boring lives," Trunks marveled.

"Yeah, tell me about it…" Mike sighed.

I looked at the radar. "The dragonball is over this way!" I quickly walked down the mall, checking the radar every few moments to make sure I did not pass the dragonball by. I stopped in front of a jewelry store and looked at the radar's reading again. "It's in there…"

"It shouldn't be too hard to find then, right? After all, how many jewels the size of a golf ball are they going to have in there?" Krillin said as we stepped into the nice-sized store.

"Let's split into groups and look for it separately!" Kakarot suggested.

"Wow. Kakarot, that is one of the smartest things I have heard come out of your mouth yet…" I said.

He gave me a blank, not amused look and then grabbed Vegeta's arm. Kakarot grinned as he pulled Vegeta away from the group. "C'mon Vegeta! Let's go look for it!"

"Baka! Let go of me!" Vegeta hissed as Kakarot dragged him off to search with him.

"Goten, Trunks, let's go!" Zar and the other two chibis dashed off before I could stop them.

"Look's like you, me, and the two losers are the last ones left," I said to Mike.

"Ah, c'mon! Piccolo's cool!" Mike defended the Namek.

"He's asexual," I stated.

"So?"

"He's asexual."

"Your point is?"

"He's asexual."

"Right…"

"Are we going to look for the dragonball or not?" Piccolo asked in a serious tone.

"Sure, why not? Sounds like fun," I shrugged and the four of us wandered down the aisles of the jewelry store, searching for a golf ball sized… well, anything.

After a few moments of looking and not finding anything, I saw Goten and Trunks jumping around excitedly while Zar waved his hands in the air, trying to catch my attention. "Looks like the boys have found something," Mike commented to me as we hurried over.

"Check it out!" Zar exclaimed when we got over to them. He was pointing excitedly at a glass showing case. Inside it was a long row of silver ball bell things and another row of gold ones. I crouched down to look in the case as Zar leaned close to me. He pointed at the back, gold row. "See the ball third down from the end? If you look really closely you can five stars inside."

"How are we going to get it out?" I asked, "Any ideas?"

"Hello," a voice from behind the counter intoned, "May I help you?"

"Um," I stood up so I could face the speaker. She was the same lady from the bathroom, "Oh… hello."

"Oh… it's you freaks…" she glared at us all but my brother especially.

"Hey! Aren't you supposed to be nice to customers?" Goten chirped.

"Yeah! You should be kind and helpful to your customers or else they won't buy anything!" Kakarot bounced up.

"Did anyone find it?" Vegeta asked, giving Kakarot a death glare.

"I found it!" Zar declared.

"Hey! No, you didn't! I did!" Trunks argued.

"I pointed out the balls! They're pretty!" Goten grinned. I began to laugh but quickly strangled the amusement so it came out as a twisted cross between a cough and a hack.

"You okay?" Mike asked me, a smirk plastered on his face. I discreetly gave him the finger in reply and he chuckled, "Guess so."

"Well, are you people here to buy something or just waste my time?" the lady snapped.

"How much are those gold balls?" Mike asked.

"Do they jiggle, uh, I meant _jingle_," I suppressed a large smile.

"Yes, they jingle." The woman gave me a look that said quite plainly, "May your sad, pathetic, immature sense of humor kill you someday because believe me, the world will not miss you." That was one look I tended to get a lot.

"Hey, my friends and I are having a religious party and we need a lot of these ringing bell balls. Could you possibly go find out how many you have so I can know if I need to order some out of a catalog too?" Mike asked, giving her his best dazzling smile.

"I'm not supposed to leave my counter…"

"Please ma'am? It would mean so much to me…" He gave her his best pair of puppy eyes.

"Well…" she hesitated and chewed on her lip, "All right. I'll be back in a few minutes." She walked off, giving us one glance before she disappeared into a back room.

Mike waited till she was out of sight, and then he went into action. He tossed Kakarot the radar, "Scout out the next dragonball."

"All right," Kakarot nodded and looked at the screen.

Mike glanced around quickly. "One of us is going to need to get the dragonball out of there without being seen by the employees."

"Not me. Knowing my luck, I'd drop it and break it or else get caught…" I waved my hands out in front of me as if to keep it away, "Nope, not me."

"I would draw unwanted attention… I believe already am…" Piccolo grumbled, shaking his head. Already people were pointing and commenting very loudly about his skin color, turban and cape as they passed by the Namek.

"Don't even look at me," Vegeta growled.

"I'll do it!" Zar volunteered with a big grin.

"Um… no," Mike answered.

"Why not?"

Mike fumbled for a reason, "You're… too short!"

"But that's a good thing! I can hide from people easier!"

"I don't want you to do it!" I growled at my rebellious little brother.

"Why not?"

"Because you're too young to be stealing things!"

"Are you saying it's okay to steal things and he's just not old enough yet?" Mike asked, appalled at the suggestion.

"Fucking hell! You stupid humans take to long to decide anything!" Vegeta exploded. He stormed over to the glass case, smashed it open and pulled out the dragonball. He shoved it roughly into the backpack that Mike had on his shoulders and then glared at the rest of us. "Let's go!" Spurred on by Vegeta's violent action and the attention it was bringing, we all grabbed onto each other and Kakarot, with his fingers to his forehead, once more transported us to the next place.

After the dark, senseless abyss, the first thing I noticed about the new location was the temperature. It was fucking _freezing!_ Below fucking freezing even! There was snow everywhere and the cold wind blew over us, quickly cooling us down to unnatural temperatures. I thanked Kami it was an overcast day or else the light reflected off the snow might have blinded us.

I was getting frozen solid and I had not been there more than a half a minute. "Where's the damn ball, Kakarot?" I howled, not happy at the predicament we were now in. I slapped my hands on my bare arms, trying to stay warm.

"It's hella cold here!" Mike pulled his jacket around his body tighter.

"Look! Eskimos!" Zar pointed, "Hiya Mr. Eskimo peoples!" He waved wildly at them.

"Zar!" I tackled my brother and bore him to the ground for a through whitewashing in the snow, "Don't get us unwanted attention, okay?"

"Awh… you take all the fun out of it," he pouted, wiping snow off his face, "You know, it's a little cold here…"

"A little?" Krillin barked, "Yeah, just a little!"

"Where is it, Kakarot?" I asked, climbing back up and now regretting having done that. Snow had melted onto my pants and I was not happy. "Tell me now before I kill someone out of sheer frustration."

Kakarot walked away from the group and so we followed him, he being our only way out of the frozen wasteland he had been so kind enough as to bring us to. "I swear, Kakarot; if I freeze to death out here, I will kill you a million times over in the afterlife," Vegeta growled.

"Kind of chilly in that spandex, eh Veg-kun?" I winked at the Saiyan no Ouji. Even in the subzero temperatures, he still looked damn fine in spandex. The Saiyan deigned not to answer. "Just a tad bit _nippily_ outside, wouldn't you agree?" I smirked.

"Why do you wish to die at such a young age?" he asked harshly, turning to glare at me.

"Because I can't help the fact that I'm madly in love with you and want to have your babies!"

He stared at me. "I believe these extreme temperatures are taking their toll on your mental health…"

"I'm just kidding. Like hell I'd ever want kids! Erg! Knowing my luck, they all would turn out just like him!" I jerked a thumb at my brother.

"What's wrong with me?" Zar asked with a hurt expression.

"Everything, baka."

"Ouch, that burned."

"There it is!" Kakarot pointed at a sleeping polar bear. Nestled in between its mighty paws, close by the beast's large head, was a silver dragonball.

"All right! Go fight the beast, Kakarot!" I ordered.

"Will it kill me?" he asked.

"Nah, nah. If it does get you, it'll just maul you up a bit… maybe chew on a few limbs…"

"Oh…"

I grabbed the radar from him. "Now go!"

"Okay, okay!" he snuck forward, trying not to wake the huge beast. He got close enough to reach for the ball and as he did, the bear's eyes opened. Nose-to-nose, with less then three inches in between their faces, the two stared at each other. The polar bear blinked once, twice and then shut its eyes for good.

Kakarot grabbed the dragonball and backed up and away from the huge mammal. "Whoa, he nearly got his face crunched off there," I thought aloud.

"That might have hurt," Mike nodded.

"Yep."

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**~~~Warning: Do not attempt to actually get that close to a real, live, wild black/brown/polar bear. That's like going up to a Saiyan and saying; "Didn't I see your grandmother in the chimpanzee exhibit at the zoo yesterday? Yeah! That was her! They've got her trained pretty well! You must be proud!" It's suicidal and anyone who is stupid enough to do that deserves to be taken out of the gene pool so they will not create spawn with the same, unintelligent tendencies. Thank you for taking the time to read this warning and have a nice day! ^_^**

Jeril: Greetings all. I really had to fight to churn out this chapter on the 10th though it did end up being extra long. I was so tired. ~_~ I did not get any sleep the night before then. I tried but the house was like a boiler room and by the time I actually got around to trying to fall asleep, it was light outside and so… yeah… I apologize for any mistakes that might turn up. *yawn* I read it through once or twice and caught most of them, I believe, but I can miss stuff…

And then fanfiction.net wouldn't let me put it up! _ Arg! I was so mad!! I would upload the chapter and it wouldn't upload!! Grrrrs… so here it is, the 14th! I feel like I failed you all! *starts crying* I'm so sorry! I'll get the last chapter up as soon as I can! I was so looking forward to ending it on my birthday too… It would have been so special…

Vegeta: And is that all you are going to do in this Author's Note? Whine about your lack of sleep and the site not letting you upload?

Jeril: I'm sorry! Forgive me!! _ I'll never do it again! *bursts into tears*

Vegeta: Don't overact, for Kami's sake.

Kakarot: Jeril, your birthday was yesterday right?

Jeril: Yes, it was! ^_^ Wow!! Kakarot remembered!! *glomps Kakarot* You know what? You're not that bad of a Saiyan at times, Kakarot!

Kakarot: *puts his hand behind his head and laughs* I've been trying to get you to see that since I met you!

Jeril: Wow… this fanfiction has taken up over one/fifteenth of my life… That's kind of sad, huh? Lol. No wonder my father tells me to get a life, heh. But I'm perfectly happy with the one I have now! *grins* I'll the get the last chap up soon, soon, soon! Sometime today! I promise! Until then, bai!

**Story Advertising:** In'lar Anth: Through Darkest Destiny – Story ID = 1208503 – w00t!! This is a good fic! I love it a lot. For those of you who are Vegeta/Kakarot fans, this is a good one. Angst, romance, and a little bit of hot, sweaty monkey sex thrown in to spice things up a bit. Oops, did I say "a little"? Might want to make that a lot… ^_~ Heh, anyway, it's good. A joint production of Rogue and DarkSerapha and, IMHO, those two are gods at this fanfiction game we play…


	62. Arise Eternal Dragon! And farewell, ever...

I grabbed the dragonball from Kakarot as Mike pushed the radar into his hand. "Find the next place now!" Mike growled as I put the dragonball into the backpack he carried on his shoulders.

"Hey, Trunks?" Goten said in an inquiring tone as he shifted from one foot to the other in the freezing snow.

"Yeah, Goten?" Trunks answered.

"I can't feel my feet."

"I can't feel mine either," Trunks admitted.

"That's bad, right?"

"Yeah, I think it is."

I grabbed onto Kakarot's shoulder as he put his two fingers to his head. The rest of the group either clutched to Kakarot or someone who was touching him. Then the bleak, snowy environment that we had inhabited for a short period of time faded out to be replaced by the black abyss that deprived our senses. The contrast was stark and left me reeling.

Finally, the final landscape blurred in. I looked around and observed that we were in, what appeared to be, a golf course. The sky was clear and the sun shined down on our frozen bodies, thawing us out. "Oh man…" I lifted my face and let it bathe in the golden sunshine, "I don't know what I would do without the sun…"

"Ow, ow, ow!" Goten fell back on his ass and grabbed his feet, "It hurts! They're tingling and it hurrrrrts!" Trunks soon followed, also complaining of pain in his feet.

"Well, you probably got a mild case of frostbite, what with being outside in cold weather like that with no footwear. If you're lucky, your toes won't fall off," Mike chided the two.

"Fall off?" Goten asked as he rubbed his foot, his eyes wide.

"Yup, it happens," Mike nodded seriously.

"Cool!" the two young demi-Saiyan yelled together, momentarily forgetting the pain in their feet.

Mike sweatdropped, "Well… that's not quite the reaction I was expecting…"

"Hey! The dragonball is just a bit over that way!" Kakarot pointed to our left and so we trudged off in that direction, searching for the final dragonball. Kakarot kept checking the radar's reading as we moved but he stopped suddenly, furrowing his brow as he stared at the screen.

"What is it, Goku?" Krillin asked.

"The dragonball… it's moving toward us," he stared at the display, "In fact, it should be passing by us right about… now."

I looked around for anyone walking by that would have the dragonball but I saw no one except for a golfer up on a hill to our left. I looked up though just in time to see the golfer's ball go flying over our heads. I thought for a moment and recalled that the other balls had been about the size of a golf ball and if one was white…

"Follow that golf ball!" I cried out and scrambled after it. It took the rest of the group a few moments to catch on to why I said that and soon they were following me after the last dragonball.

I picked it up out of the grass and stared into it to locate the four red stars that I knew would be floating inside of it, but yet I could not see any! Kakarot ran up with the dragonball radar. "Yup, that's it," he said, checking the screen.

"Um, guys?" Mirai Trunks glanced behind us nervously, "There's a golfer running after us, waving his club around and he looks really pissed off."

"Book it!" I yelled, taking off down the course with Mike and Zar close on my heels.

"Books?" Piccolo asked aloud.

"Judging by their reaction to the term, I think it must be some slang for 'run away' or something of the sort," Mirai Trunks guessed.

"We should follow them. They have the dragonballs," Krillin pointed out.

"Right," the group blasted off after the dimension's three natives.

They reached us as we were cresting a hill. I paused for a moment, panting heavily as I turned to look behind me. "Has the man stopped chasing us?" I gasped out.

"He stopped three hills back," Vegeta said, standing with his arms crossed.

"Yeah, he was really fat and couldn't keep up," Goten said.

"You mean, I just ran for Kami-only-knows how long a distance for nothing?" I collapsed into the grass, "I was never meant for athletics…"

"But you always did well in gym class…" Zar said in a puzzled tone.

My eyes widened, "That's because I did weight-lifting. Never, ever, _ever_ did I dare to tread on the unholy ground known as… _track team._"

"Oh… right," Zar looked away as if to say 'she's not my sister'.

"Anyway, are we going to call the Eternal Dragon here or are we going to go to a more secluded area?" Mike asked.

"Are you kidding?" I asked him, looking surprised. I jumped up on a small boulder nearby and posed, throwing one fist up into the air, "We have to do it here! We will let the world know, once and for all, that anime otakus everywhere will not stand to be cooped up in the dark! We are proud of what we are and we will not stand to be labeled as nerds and geeks! With one voice, we will roar to the night 'We love anime!'" I called out as thunder and lightning flashed around me out of nowhere.

"Ok, that was cool," Zar grinned, "Awesome special effects, sis."

I laughed, "It's my natural charisma!" Suddenly, a smallish bolt of lightning flashed down through the air to strike me, flinging me off the boulder to land sprawling on the grassy hilltop.

"Did you know that 'otaku' is actually an insulting thing to call anime enthusiasts?" Mike asked, giving me a hand up.

"Baka," I grumbled, nursing my aching head.

"Just because I'm more knowledgeable than you gives you no reason to hate me, Bo," Mike said with a smirk.

"Are we going to summon the Eternal Dragon or no?" Piccolo growled impatiently.

"Hold onto your damn pantyhose, we're getting to that," I hissed.

"Do we just put the dragonballs in a circle?" Zar asked.

"Sure," shrugged Kakarot, "I don't know how the Eternal Dragon here works so that's the best we can do."

"Okay!" Zar and the two young demi-Saiyans pulled all six of the dragonballs out of the backpack to assemble them in a circle. Zar looked around for the seventh and picked up the white dragonball I had dropped by the boulder. He scratched a bit at it, uncovering the fact that it had been painted over with white paint. Under the painted exterior, the four red stars shone bright.

We all stood in a wide circle around the dragonballs, staring at the many colors displayed there; silver, copper, green, white, gold, blue, black and all with red stars. Whoever had created the dragonballs of my Earth could not make up their mind that is for sure.

Kakarot stood straight and called out in a strong, clear voice, "Arise, Eternal Dragon!"

I waited in trembling anticipation. I was so close to seeing the great, almighty, Eternal Dragon that would be summoned by the dragonballs; so close that I could nearly _taste_ it. I shifted on my feet, waiting for the moment when the Dragon would burst from the dragonballs and ascend into the sky to grant our wish.

"Where's the Dragon?" Krillin wondered aloud after a few moments.

"I don't know…" Kakarot thought for a moment, "We said the right words, right?"

"Don't tell me these dragonballs need a password!" Vegeta snarled, looking like he was ready to kill someone. He stormed up to the dragonballs, "Where are you, you fucking, worthless Dragon?" He kicked one of the dragonballs and it shot away, rebounded off the boulder and hit the unprepared Vegeta in the stomach, knocking him flat. Vegeta clutched his stomach and coughed as he struggled to stand and reclaim what dignity he had left.

Suddenly, a cloud of light began to collect around the dragonballs as the sky around the area we were in darkened as storm clouds quickly rolled in. Suddenly, a small, light green figure sprung out of the light and bowed to us. "Greetings," the Eternal Dragon said cheerfully.

We all stared at the short, slightly pudgy Dragon. "Um, hello," Kakarot said in a slightly stunned voice.

"Hiya! Are you the Eternal Dragon?" Goten chirped.

"Yup, that's me!" the Dragon grinned.

"Aren't you supposed to be," I searched for a word for a moment, "…more massive?"

"Eh heh heh," he laughed nervously and played with one of his small claws, "Well, see, I'm new to the job and all, I'm also quite young, so, yeah. I'm a little small…"

"A little? That's an understatement," Vegeta growled.

"So how many wishes do these dragonballs get?" Mirai Trunks asked.

"Three," the Dragon replied.

"Shit, seriously?" I asked, "Damn, this is gonna be awesome!"

The Dragon blushed, "Can you to refrain from using curse words around me? It makes me uncomfortable."

"Uh, yeah. Whatever," I shrugged.

"Well, what are your wishes?" the Dragon positively beamed at us.

"I wi-" Zar began but I had been prepared for that and my hand shot out to clamp over his mouth.

"Oh, no you don't, brat! Like hell I'm letting you wish for anything stupid!" I growled, baring my teeth at my brother. He mumbled something under my hand. "And don't start cussing me out when I can't hear you either!"

"So, I guess we're going home…" Krillin said, looking at the Eternal Dragon.

Mirai Trunks looked quite relieved. "Thank Kami! No more fangirls!" He shuddered.

"It's been good knowing all of you," Mike said smiling, "I won't forget meeting you all and all the fun we had."

"Fun!" Vegeta laughed hoarsely, "It's been pure hell with all those psychotic girls taking pictures of me and obsessing over my spandex! Crazy bitches…" The Dragon blushed again.

"I'm going to miss you, Veggie-chan!" I howled and glomped the Saiyan.

He ripped me off of him and threw me to the ground. "I won't be missing you at all."

"Ouch, that's harsh…" I sniffled.

We all said our good-byes to each other and then Kakarot called out, "Eternal Dragon! I wish that the people present who belong in the dimension of Dragonball Z, as the humans here call it, will return to that dimension!"

"So you want to go back to your own dimension?" the Dragon asked.

"Yup." Kakarot nodded.

"Okay, let me see if I can do this…" the Eternal Dragon put its paws to its head and squeezed its eyes shut in concentration. Slowly, the characters from Dragonball Z began to fade away.

"Good-bye!" Zar called out, waving. "Don't forget to write!"

"Bye Zar!" Goten yelled back, but his voice was rapidly fading.

"See you later…" Trunks' voice was no more than a whisper as the characters disappeared from our sight.

"Awh… and I still haven't gotten to get laid by Vegeta…" I pouted.

"What will we wish for with the last two wishes?" Mike asked a loud.

"Go ahead and take your time," the Dragon said, "I've got all of eternity to hang around and grant wishes. That's why I'm the Eternal Dragon." It grinned.

"What do you want to wish for?" I asked the two guys who stood there with me.

"Five million bucks!" Mike grinned, "Then I could get a nice house, an awesome computer, a couple cars, a football field size swimming pool, etc."

"I want a life-time supply of candy and ice cream!" Zar chuckled and rubbed his hands together gleefully.

"Why not also wish for cavity-proof teeth while you're at it?" I asked sarcastically.

"Good idea! I think I will!"

"No! You are _not_ wasting our wishes on fucking stupid wishes like those!" I snarled.

"Fine, fine… what are we wishing for then?" he asked.

"I vote we wish to become Saiyans and then wish to go to the Dragonball Z universe," I said smirking.

"They won't know we're there!" Zar's eyes lit up.

"Think of all the damage we can do before they find out!"

"I could become a Super Saiyan!"

"I could become a Super Saiyan Stage Three!"

"What about Stage Four?" Mike asked.

"Dragonball GT never happened. Vegeta _never_ had a mustache and Trunks, Pan and Kakarot never had to do that damn disco thing."

"Oh, is that some unspoken thing between Vegeta fangirls?"

"Yup, at least in the group I am part of. GT was one of the most pathetic things ever to happen in the Dragonball world and therefore, it never happened."

"Denial is not only a river in Egypt." Mike grinned.

"Do I look like I care about geography?"

"So is that what we are wishing for?" Zar asked.

"If that's okay with you two…" they nodded, "All righty then!" I turned to the Eternal Dragon, "We have decided our two wishes. First, we wish to become Saiyans. Second, we wish to be transported to the Dragonball Z dimension, preferably in a remote area where the others will not find us."

The Dragon looked slightly concerned, "Are you sure you want to change to another race? It's not exactly a piece of cake… and it might be a little painful." (Hah! "A little painful", my fucking ass! That stupid bastard of a Dragon had made the understatement of the century when he said that.)

"I'm sure," I answered.

"Me too," Mike confirmed.

"And me!" Zar grinned.

"Okay, don't say I didn't warn you." The Dragon put its paws up to its head once more and closed its eyes.

That is when the most excruciating pain I have ever felt in all my years of living exploded throughout my body. It felt like someone was pouring molten lead through my veins and then dunking my body in a vat of acid. I could not move and it was everything I could do to stop myself from screaming. I fell to the ground and started twitching around as the scenery around me began to bleed and blur from view.

Then my world went black and my consciousness drifted away on the tides of an everlasting ocean of darkness...

**THE END**

**OR IS IT?**

**TO BE CONTINUED…**

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeril: Greetings everyone! The 13th was my birthday and so it's time to celebrate! *dances around happily* I am now 15! *hands out cake and ice cream to everyone* The only thing that is bringing me down is my family's moving to Washington in July. ;-; If anyone sees a teenage girl wandering around Washington, looking very lost and confused this summer, chances are it's gonna be me. Lol. I hate big cities. _ Garg! The only good thing is going to be all the stores and stuff! Hot Topic, here I come! w00t!

Kakarot: Ice cream! Cake! *snatches it all from Jeril*

Jeril: No! *hits Kakarot on the head with a frying pan* Share with the reviewers or I swear to Kami, I will make you suffer a thousand deaths before you die! And there will be no food involved whatsoever! *Kakarot pales and quickly begins to help Jeril hand out food to the reviewers* Good Kakarot. ^_^ Good boy.

Vegeta: Kakarot… *shakes his head in despair* You are an utter disgrace to all Saiyan everywhere as I have stated many times before and will probably state again.

Jeril: Lighten up, Vegeta! Have some cake! *hands Vegeta a particularly large slice of cake* Enjoy! *bounces off to serve other reviewers*

Vegeta: *stares at the cake and then shrugs* Can't hurt to try… *digs in*

Jeril: All right! Now that I'm done handing out birthday food, I will say my last, parting words! First, I'd like to thank a few special people who I could not have made it this far without. There's Drogan, who helped me come up with the entire ending plot. I would not have thought of our Earth having dragonballs if it wasn't for her. Thanks Drogan and much love to you! (and I loved my birthday gifts! Squee!! They rock!) ^_^ And then there's S'rac, my muse! A wonderful guy with awesome ideas who I don't know what I would have done if I hadn't have had his rock steady support all along! ^_^ And next there is J'dee, who is one of my best friends, BananaGirl, another awesome friend, and Rogue, who is a little scary but that's all right! Long live the Rogue Order!! XD I couldn't have done it without any of you! Kudos to you all and may your lives be blessed!!

And a special thanks go out to my reviewers, those who have been there since the beginning, those who joined in the middle, and the newbies! ^_^ I couldn't have done it without your support! A million thanks!

For those of you who might be wondering what that little "OR IS IT? TO BE CONTINUED…" meant: **yes, I am planning a sequel.** XD No, I don't know when it'll be coming out though at the least it will be a few months from now. I need a little bit of a break from ABDN, as much fun as it has been. I need to get some new ideas and freshen myself up a bit. ^_^ I'm complying a list of people to notify by e-mail when I post it up. So if you want to be informed about it when it comes out, say so in your review and leave your e-mail address there too. Anyway, it's been great, I'll miss you all and keep an eye out on my account, or your inbox, for the sequel!

I love you all and you'll be sorely missed! Every one of you! Peace out and live great lives!

P.S. Warning: shameless plug! ;p If you get a little bored waiting for the sequel and you happen to watch the anime Trigun, check out my fanfic 'Watashi no Gutaika no Yume' for that anime. Some of you already have and it's turning out to be as popular, if no more so, than this fic! ^_^ Now, for the final time, farewell!


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